Jens, who once wakes up in the middle of a city without memories of his past other than this name is the protagonist of the story. He starts his journey with meeting new friends and rivals, eventually learning things about his past and regaining portions of his memories. The magical journey starts becoming a horrifying nightmare...

~Daniel POV~

When morning sun rises in, I can feel the slight weight on my shoulder. I open my eyes to the most beautiful and bedazzling image in my eyes. That is the sleeping face of my most precious wife. 

I prop her chin up and trace my finger from her forehead, her nose and down to her dewy sexy red lips that still a little swollen cause by our passionate kisses. I really want to kiss her lips again but I have to hold myself. I don't to wake her up because I know that she still exhaust because of our passionate love making for last few hours. 

I kiss her forehead and smile to myself. 'Hahaha… I don't know that my stamina is that high because it been long that I can move my own body. If I don't hold myself in that last few hours and let myself sleep… If I don't remember that we still have things to settle down today… probably I would be still devouring you and would not let you go out from bed the whole 3 day… Hahaha…   I'm sorry my wife… you got yourself a horny husband… ' I thought to myself still smiling from ear to ear. 

'OMG… I think I should put **DO NOT DISTURB SIGNED** by our door… If not… there'll someone will budge in… I want to let my precious wife sleep in for few more hours… So that she can have enough rest after our session last night…' I thought. I slowly put her head down to her own pillow before I am up and out of the bed. I take my cardboard paper then I write on it with big bold font on it. 

*** DO NOT DISTURB US YET… WE ARE BUSY IN OUR OWN LOVEY DOVEY WORLD…***

'HAHAHA…' I laugh at my own naughtiness. 'If my wife saw the signed she probably cripples me once again.'

I stick the signed on the outside of our bedroom door. Then I went in our bedroom once again and lock out door.

I took off my upper pajama and throw it to the side before go back to accompany my wife in our bed once again. I took her body and cuddling her once again. I just love this view the most. I can do this thing the whole day by just looking at her sleeping face. I feel satisfied and happy. When I saw her eyes fluttering a little bit I close back my own eyes. I want to know what she will do. 'Hahahaha…' 

I can feel some movement from her. Then I feel her touching me and she traces her finger on my face. 

Then she traces it on my lips then down to my neck, she traces it slowly to my collarbone down to my chest then slowly to my 6 packs stomach follow with her soft kisses. 

Even though I can't move my lower half body for many years. Kelvin, Jonathan and Bryan will help me to work up every day since I woke up from my coma. So my body will always stay in perfect shape even though it is tough to do the work out when you are half paralyzed. I am thankful for their love and support every day. They are really my best friend forever and swore brothers. 

I can feel my body getting hot and she makes me turn on once again because of her touch.

'OMG… My Love… Are you trying to seduce me again… Are you ready to pay for the consequences…? Hahaha'

I open my eyes slowly with my eyes lowering and saw my wife still tracing my body with her finger while giving all her soft kisses on it. I can't hold on anymore and cradles her body to the side and make myself on top of her once more. I tickles her side and she laugh so much till her eyes had a teary on the side. Then I stop my movement and stare straight into her beautiful eyes again. 

"Good Morning… My Love… You are so naughty early in this morning by seducing me with all the kisses… Are ready to accept all the consequences because of your naughtiness??" I say with my eyes that already gazing her with my passionate love. I don't give her time to answer and started kissing her lips again and again. I can't hold back anymore. We engage in another passionate love making.

She falls asleep once more after our session. I kiss her forehead before I slowly got up and went to the bathroom to take my own bath. After taking my bath and put on my comfy casual cloth and long black sweat pant, I went to my secret room. 

I went in and get the medicine. I need to consume this medicine until I am really sure that I am fully healed. So, I consume it in the usual amount. After that I went back to our room and found that she already woke up and not in our bed. I heard the water from the bathroom. 

'Owh… She is taking her shower… I would like to join her in the shower again… Hahaha… It would be nice and hot…' I thought. There's two tiny evil and angle pop out from my mind.  

Tiny Evil : Just go join her… you can devour your wife again… hahaha…

Tiny angle : Don't be so horny… Don't both of you has something to settle   
                      today. Don't you pity her…? She will be all exhaust if you go 
                      for another round.      

'Hahaha… I think we can continue this session again tonight. Now I think I should let her on her own for now…' I thought. After a while, I am still debating in my own mind. 

She came out from the bathroom with only a short towel cover her body. I can see all the love bite all over her neck and collarbone. Her white pale body and her slim long leg are still flushing red after her warm shower and it's so compelling. Her hair now still slightly wet make her look sexier now.  

'OMG… you are seducing me again my wife…' I gulp down my saliva. She looks at me and blushing hard. 'She is So cute while blushing like that…' 

I can't help myself thinking nothing else matter other than to throw her back on the bed and stay there the whole day. But then, I hold myself thinking that we still need to settle the things with her family lawyer. 

I can see her runaway like a scared kitten to our walk in wardrobe. 'Owh… so cute… I love you…' I kept my thinking to myself.

She went out from our walk in wardrobe in her comfy casual shirt and a long black sweat pant. In the past we would always wear couple casual shirt and couple pant and we are now in this couple cloth. 

I smile to her and take the towel from her hand and let her seat on our dressing table. I help her to dry up her hair with the towel then blow it with the hair dryer. "Thank you love…" She says.

I bow down and kiss her forehead and back hug her. "This feels like a dream. Now, you already healed. But, you can't neglect your health from now on. I will ask Bro Bryan to follow up your appointment to do fully body check up afterward. Okay?" She asks with her puppy eyes. "Okay." I agreed. 

It is a miracle for me to be healed now. It had been four years after the accident. I am actually losing my hope on my recovery. Maybe it is because of my wills to protect my wife is so strong that really make the miracle happens.

"Thank you Love… For return back to me and accepting me in my most unperfected selves as handicap man… I love you so much" I say to her.

"I am so thankful to you too… because you are so loyal to our love without even asking anything from me in returned. I am feeling thankful for giving chances to be back to your side and you accepting me as your wife. I love you too."                                        

She gave a peck on my cheek then to my lips. I return the kiss and then bury my face near her neck and kiss it.

"Let go to have our breakfast now. It's already 10am. Probably they are waiting for us." I say to her. I take her hand in mine and intertwining her finger with mine. 

"Owh… no.. Wait… I need to put some concealer to this love bite around my neck to conceal it." She says with a slight blush on her cheek. I chuckle and say to her; "Let me help you put it on." She glares to me because of my laugh still blushing hard. Now I can see the redness till the tip of her ears. 

"Hahahaha… You are so cute, my love. You know what… I am thinking now that I don't want to do anything else other than to throw my cutey little wifey back to our bed…" I kiss her again on her lips.

"Stop that pervert mind of yours. If you continue that action I probably cannot walk straight afterwards." She replied bowing her head to hide her red face.

"Hahahaha…" I laugh and she pinch hard on my stomach. "OOuch… okay… okay… I will stop laughing… hahaha" I say with my surrender signed hand. Then I take the concealer make up and help her to conceal the love bite on her neck while still smiling from ear to ear. She still blushing and her face really like a rip red tomato. 

After finishing off to put the concealer on her love bite. Once again I take her hand in mine and intertwining her finger with mine. "Let's go now, my love." I said while smiling at her. She follows me obediently.

Feeya Valerie Joseph just an ordinary woman who has a loyal heart when she falls in love. 

On her wedding day, she has been sold by her fiance or her groom to the cripple billionaire for 1 billion dollars. 

Feeya is the most beautiful and pretties bride. She walk down the aisle beside her father with sweet smile on her lips when she suddenly feel so anxious when she look to the front and she found that the groom is seated on the wheelchair. In her mind and heart started to ask so many question... 'Why is Richard seated on a wheelchair? What has happen to him? OMG... Is he got involve in accident when he's coming here?' she so worried about him... 

When she come nearer to the groom, she was startle and shock written whole over her face.. "Who are you?? Where's my groom??" with so many question that she can't voice out. 

On the other side, the cripple groom still in daze and shock to look at the most beautiful and prettiest bride, he only snap from his daze within a second to answer her "I'm Daniel Stephan.. and I am your groom the second I check.. You are my most beautiful and prettiest bride for today..." with his most charming smile. 

~~~~~~~~~~~

Hi, I'm your aurthor. This is my 1st novel. I just want to share some of my creations. Please ignore if there is any mistake on my sentence/vocabulary/grammar. Hope all of you can give me some guidance and support. (~v~)

KYLE'S POV

Another week passed by and there was still no change in Maya's condition. It's like her mind and body had gone into hibernation. Dr. Morrison deduced that she was probably, suffering from emotional trauma, and she had withdrawn into the coma as a protective mechanism. She didn't want to come back to the real world because she didn't want to face reality or to deal with her grief. 

Try as we might we couldn't bring her back. 

The children visited every day and took turns reading to her or just talking to her, but she didn't even blink or twitch to acknowledge their presence. 

"We'll just have to wait it out," Dr. Morrison advised as he did his routine check-up that afternoon. "There's nothing more we can do I'm afraid."

"The waiting s driving me crazy Doc," I balked as I resumed my position at her bedside. 

"While I sympathize with you, that's all we can do right now, I'm afraid." He frowned his expression every bit as serious as mine. "I'll see you later." He patted me on the shoulder and left.

I hopped onto the bed and lay next to my wife, my hand on her midsection. "Come back, babe... I need you. We all need you, Maya," I whispered to her. "I can't do this without my love. Please wake up and come back to me..."  The monitor began to beep and I turned his attention to the screen. "I know that you're hurting babe... I know that you can never get over what happened to Rita and your parents-and I know you think it's your fault-you must be blaming yourself... but you had no control over what happened. None of us did babe." I traced the outline of her cheekbones, trying to get through to her somehow. "Don't give up Maya-we still need you. Our best days are still ahead of us babe, so, if you can hear me, please come back my love...please? I'm begging you-and you know that I haven't asked for a lot from you babe-come back to me...that's all I'm asking-just come back, babe..." I rested my head on her shoulder and cried. Just when I thought I had no more tears to cry, they slid down my face involuntarily. 

I heard a shuffle of feet as someone entered the room but I never bothered checking who it was. I just felt a big, firm hand rubbing my back. 

"It's going to be okay son," my father consoled me in low and soothing tones. "She's going to be okay. You just have to believe that."

My breath caught and it took effort to force out a response. "I just want her back Dad..." I said in a choked voice. "Is that asking for too much?" I muttered, with a sniffle.

"No son, you're not asking for a lot."  He replied. My heart contracted at those simple words.

"I'd give anything to have her back. I'd even give my own life-if only she-would-" I broke down again. 

"I know son. So would I," he said in a calm, sincere voice. I knew that he meant it. 

"I'm sorry to disturb sir," Robert towered at the door. "But the Governor of Texas is here. He'd like to offer his condolences and check on Mrs K-" 

"I'm not in state to see anyone, Robert. Please offer my apologies," I said, not moving from my current position. 

"Of cos Sir." Robert nodded.

"Wait-let me have a word with him rather," Lorenzo offered. "He's an old friend. Maybe if he hears it from me, it won't seem like a rebuff." 

"Okay," I agreed. 

"I'll be right back," he said before he followed after Robert. 

"I know that you didn't really want to see him right? I addressed my wife. "You don't really like company when you're sick anyway. You prefer to curl up in a ball and ride it out," I let out a short laugh. "But I know that you like it when I sing to you but I'm not in a good place babe. I don't feel much like singing or doing anything really." I took her hand as I leaned forward and brushed my lips lightly against her; imprinting my essence on her sub-consciousness. "I miss you so much Maya... and I love you... and I live for the day that you will open those pretty brown eyes..."

Before I knew it I was singing to her, with her hand clutched in mine and as tears ran down my face, I poured my heart out to the love of my life.


There are days
I wake up and I pinch myself
You're with me, not someone else
And I am scared, yeah, I'm still scared
That it's all a dream
'Cause you still look perfect as days go by
Even the worst ones, you make me smile
I'd stop the world if it gave us time

'Cause when you love someone
You open up your heart
When you love someone
You make room
If you love someone
And you're not afraid to lose 'em
You'll probably never love someone like I do
You'll probably never love someone like I do

When you say
You love the way I make you feel
Everything becomes so real
Don't be scared, no, don't be scared
'Cause you're all I need
And you still look perfect as days go by
Even the worst ones, you make me smile
I'd stop the world if it gave us time

'Cause when you love someone
You open up your heart
When you love someone
You make room
If you love someone
And you're not afraid to lose 'em
You'll probably never love someone like I do
You'll probably never love someone like I do

All my life
I thought it'd be hard to find
The one 'til I found you
And I find it bittersweet

'Cause you gave me something to lose
But when you love someone
You open up your heart
When you love someone
You make room
If you love someone
And you're not afraid to lose 'em

You'll probably never love someone like I do
You'll probably never love someone like I do
You'll probably never love someone like I do

(Source: LyricFind
Love Someone LUKAS GRAHAM© O/B/O Capasso)

The Billionaire's Song Sequel

One night was all I needed before I broke her heart and shattered her trust. I knew that this would probably be the last time we would be this close-this open with each other. I wish I hadn't kept this from her. How I wish I could turn back time and do this all over again. But it was too late now. I just hope our love was strong enough to survive the storm that was coming...

~ despise is such a strong emotion that describes and gives emphasis on how much you loath a person

---

Sometimes love ain't fair.

When you ask for it to appear because you highly needed it, then it'll come out wrongly, and ironically enough to change your perception of love.

It sometimes come as a surprise.

A void emotion.

A challenge.

Or a mistake.

But these happenings give us an idea of what real love meant or how it works.

It opens our eyes to see what reality is.

Somehow, the pain that it might bring will shape us, motivate us to be better and give us a good lesson.

As what the saying goes, "our experiences were the best teachers we had".

Have you experienced being hurt?

By those people you love the most?

By those people whom you trusted dearly?

And from those people whom you think might love you back?

If yes.

Then, we're on the same page.

"Been there, done that" like what I always say

So I stopped hoping.

I stopped believing.

I begged to differ from every relationship that's successfully existing.

I rebelled from every positive view of love.

Why?

Because it's stupid!

Does it really exist?

If you base it on Sciences, it is only the brain that manipulates our emotions, so how come love came from a sudden heart beat when you abruptly saw the one?

Lies.

Lies.

Lies.

I don't wanna get myself stuck in a crazy lie.

Love doesn't exist.

We just care for other people.

We just want to protect them.

Give all the time we have.

And make sure to bring happiness, but that won't mean it's love.

It isn't.

Affection is far from love.

Infatuation is not love.

As well as admiration.

But all of them are emotions we usually feel, then right away we conclude that we're in love.

...

This are my silly thoughts right now, in every glass of tequila that I drink, furthermore drowning myself, and literally killing every cells in my body.

This is life.

This is my life.

And I write my own story.

I'm just lonely but not vulnerable. Hard headed but tolerable. Cold but not that bitter.

I just wanna dance in this bar. Let men drool. But that won't mean I wanna get laid after. Heck I might be frustrated, but I won't stoop that low. My dignity meant everything to me, and that's the main reason why I'll remain as a virgin.

Sounds boring right?

Well what can I say? I AM ME.

Alone with my thoughts, a guy pulled me up from the bar counter. In my drunken state it was easy to pick me up without wasting much force. I'm a little bit sober, I just can't control every wage of emotion that my body gives as a reaction to his unannounced appearance.

He hugged me, and whispered something in my left ear. But I was too drunk to let the words sink in my head. I'm too occupied by my own sad thoughts that I never bothered taking his words seriously.

Out of the blue, he held my waist as tight as possible. And kissed me.

If you ask about electric shots or that shivering feeling they exaggeratedly describe when they meet "The One"  in fictional stories well it ain't real. There's no thunderbolt that'll appear when you kiss a stranger.

Heck, I don't even think that "the one" as what they call it, or the perfect guy exists. Nahhh that's somewhat unreal.

He cupped my face and lean his forehead against mine when he broke the kiss. Still catching each others breath. We held gazes the longest possible.

His warm breath was fanning against my cold cheeks. And his sinful lips were inches far from mine. He stared back at me.

Then a flash from a camera lighted the darkness of the bar's dance floor.

What the hell did I get myself into?

***

(Skyler's POV)

~ when your past still hunts you, never look for an escape, don't try to runaway and hide, you'll get better if you face it

---

Michelle, such a sweet name for a woman. But behind her smiles, she's a traitor. Behind her words, are lies that you don't want to hear. And behind such innocent beauty, there's an evil creature. She's a temptress and a good deceiver.

I can still remember how many times I've saved her sorry ass. How many nights I've wasted next to her. How many opportunities swept away because I prioritized her well-being and her wants.

I gave her all of me. Mind, heart and soul. But instead of returning the favor back, she betrayed me. Cheated behind my back, kissed someone without notice, and opened legs her to every other man she'd stumbled upon.

She's nothing but an empty shell. A whore of all kinds. And a broken revengeful person, who can't move one from her ex. I totally despise her, I loathe her existence.

All girls are the same. My biological whore of a mother who eloped with my uncle right after my father's 40th birthday. My sister, another bitch who fucks every guys she likes and ruined my best friend Zach. My stepmother who disgusted me in every way I can imagine, trying to get her hands down to my father's business associates.

In this world you can never trust your heart not to get broken with a woman. They are all little bitches who whisper in your ears and seduce you. Control your life. And manipulate everything that you do. They deserve no love at all. They deserve pain and agony. They deserve to get hurt.

With these bitterness I have inside, I drank my last glass of Scotch. Then my eyes landed to someone so familiar. A pair of green eyes met my blue ones. 

"Speaking of the devil, Michelle herself, such an unpleasant surprise".

She made her way to mine. Same old seductress she is. But her eyes were no longer vibrant. Her face somehow aged. And her hair was cut halfway through her shoulders. But somehow her appearance still indicated how much of a gold-digging bitch she was.

"Hello baby" she tried to reach for my hand but I dodge far from her sickening touch.

"Ms. Morgan" I greeted back, she should be pleased that I still gave a remark of her existence.

"Oh hush my love, don't act so formal around me. We have been through a lot before. I missed you babe" she tried to move a little closer to me.

"Sadly, the feelings' not mutual anymore, now if you'll excuse me" she held my hand and grip it tightly, I removed her hands from mine.

"I want us back baby" she whispered

"Ahahaha, what a nonsense Ms. Morgan, next time don't you dare lay one finger on me. I might not take it well" I threatened, but as stupid she is, she interpreted it the wrong way.

"Oh right! I knew it babe, I knew you'd missed me on your bed" she smiled as if she grew another head

"Nope, I didn't even know you still existed until you showed up, those nights were only spent because of lust and nothing more, after all you're just nothing but everybody's favorite whore" I spoke harshly, her smile faltered.

"You loved me Sky. You still do" I laughed at her remark.

"Past tense, so might as well why don't you vanish, I hate to bring this to you, but it disgusts me to see your pathetic face" she laughed at me

"Says the man who loves fucking me anywhere, says the man who begged for me to stay and the man who can't move on from me" I'm already loosing my patience, but I need to hold myself back and refrain from causing any scandal. I breathed deeply, and smirk at her.

"Funny as ever Michelle, but as you see I'm here with my soon to be fiancé" then I scanned the crowd for a potential candidate, hoping there would be someone who's decent enough. Then one girl caught my eye.

"She's perfect" the words escaped from my mouth loud enough for Michelle to turn her head to where I was looking. Damn it!

"What? No way! You! You bastard! How? Imposing what you said is next to impossible. I know you still love me. We can still fix us. I can make love to you better now, just say what you want and I'll do it. Just don't leave me! YOU LOVE ME SKY! You do! You still do! And we both knew it" she burst in fake tears.

"Well sorry to bring the bad news to you, but I am certain that I will marry the love of my life" I look back to the girl who's been my target, I think she's still somewhat sober. My feet walk on its own accord. The effect of liquor made me take the risks. I just hope that this girl is single, or else I'll be in deep trouble. Before I made it too far, Michelle blocked my way.

WARNING: This book is rated SPG (Strong Parental Guidance) which is not suitable for ages 17 below. It contains scenes with themes, language, violence, sex, horror, or drugs, which may not be suitable for children. Strong parental guidance is advised, strictly for reading purposes only. The readers should be responsible enough to avoid enactment of the explicit scenes that the book contains.

Ignited by passion and despise, the 28 year old Alexandra Lewisville was caught in a most embarrassing mistake with the city's most eligible bachelor Skyler Penicillin. 

Skyler was trying to get over from his psychotic, manipulative and gold digging ex. But his ex tried seducing him at the bar. Upon making a lie, he spotted a woman who's getting herself wasted. He grabbed her and told her to ride along, and even proposed to her as he claimed her as his fiancée.

Alexandra on the other hand was pursued and pressured by his grandfather to get married. She doesn't know where to look for a husband who'll meet her standards. Luckily she took the opportunity when a man laid it out to grab.

The next morning they caught themselves signing a contract for marriage. However Skyler never thought that the woman is his best friend's little sister. Who has been recommended to date him for the past 12 years, but he avoided thoroughly because of her once nerdy appearance.

---

"How did you become someone who's hotness drive people crazy? You're addictive" Skyler murmured

"You're just blind" Alexandra whispered back while she pinched his cheeks

---

How will the two work on a lie that Skyler created as an escape from his psychotic ex? Will they be in a hopeless romantic fake relationship? or will they deny the fact that they're falling?

After the warm bath, Minho gave me ginger tea. And then we both huddled in front of the fireplace because it's getting colder.
I was focused on watching the fire, thinking of how to say it to him. And Minho, Minho's not saying anything. He's just looking at me, then stoking the fire, then back at looking at me. He's quiet but I can feel the pressure in it.
But I'm afraid. I don't know how to say it. I don't know where to start. And I'm not used to this because I'm not really a good sharer. 
I sighed. Oh whatever. Here goes.
"Uh..."
Minho stared at me. I gulped. Scaryyyy. 
"Uh, the thing you said earlier.. "
"Which one? The one where I told you to take a warm bath?" Oh he cut me off. Is he mad? 
"No. Earlier than that?"
"That we're gonna talk? Well we're talking." Uh-oh. He really is mad. 
"Yes well. Still earlier than that."
"Oh! You mean when we... You know.. In the room?"
"Yeah."
"So what about it?"
"The thing that you said it's wrong to do it?"
"Oh that. Well, honestly, I believe that sex should be done right after marriage. It's the greatest gift a man or a woman could ever give to his or her other half. I mean, how precious could it be if you give your first time to the one you're married with."
I sighed. "Ok. So what if you marry-"
"With you."
I choked. "Ehem okay. Let's just say you didn't know me. So, you married. And then, on the night of your honeymoon, she divulged to you that she's not a virgin anymore. What would you do?"
I looked at him expectantly. He moved his eyes down, and kept quiet for some time. 
"Well, I-I don't think it matters anymore. I love her and I love her for all that she is, flaws and all. It will really be hard to accept but no matter, I will still love her."
My eyes welled up. Okay okay Cassidy, not yet. "Okay, so what if you knew about that lost virginity when you're still dating, or in the boyfriend/girlfriend relationship? How would you react? What would you do?"
"Why these questions Cassidy? Something bothering you?"
Uh. "No, well yes. But just answer first Minho. Please."
"Uh okay. So regarding that situation, I really don't know." He sighed. "It's just, it's a far cry from my priciples in life. I vowed in my youth before that I would never marry someone tainted with some other guy."
I inhaled sharply at that. I was greatly offended. But what can I do, it's his opinion.
"But, if she's the one I truly love, I definitely would still love her. It's not her fault. We are all sinners, and sometimes we can't resist temptation. So, it won't matter. I will still love her more for being brave and honest that she told me about it."
I looked down. Should I tell him? But he said, he will love more. But will he accept me? I don't know if his love for me is enough to do that. But still, I have to do this. Better now than later.
I looked back at him, then,  "Minho, I want to say..."
I took a deep breath, "I want you to know that I may be not as innocent as you think I am."
"I know 'cause we all have that fair share of badness."
"Yeah. And I've had sex with my boyfriend before. When we were still together." I covered my eyes, afraid of what expressions I would see in his.
But he pulled my hands away, and looked me straight in the eye. "So what?"
"You, you don't hate me?"
"I told you, it doesn't matter. If I truly love her, I'll love her. It's in the past now. And we're on to the future."
"You're not disgusted with me?"
"No. I'm just happy that you trusted me of your secret. It makes me feel so loved. So, no.  Never. Never will I feel disgusted of you okay? Don't look down on yourself. You have done what you have felt is right."
I sobbed. Minho hugged me. "Minho, you don't really mind about it?"
He sighed and kissed my head. "Actually, I feel a little disappointed that I wasn't the first. But, what's done is done. I just have to accept it you know. But it won't change the fact that I love you."
I looked at him. "Your love wasn't subtracted or anything?"
"No. In fact, it's multiplying a thousand times every single day. And today, it's multiplied a million times even more."
I laughed and lightly spanked his shoulder. "Silly."
And then I looked at his eyes, those mesmerizing eyes. I want this man for myself. I want him so bad.
I moved closer and held the back of his head. He touched my cheeks as well.
"Minho," I whispered. "Will you mind if I do something bad to you?"
He answered, breathing heavily, "What bad thing?"
"Oh, I don't know." I inched closer until I sat on his lap.
"Cassidy, what are you trying to do?"
I smiled wickedly and rubbed myself into him. "Minho, will you hate me if I showed my bad side to you?"
"Cassidy, stop doing that, okay?"
"But I like this Minho." I leaned and whispered seductively on his ear, "Don't you like this Minho?"
I felt his hands hold my waist. Hmmm. I traced my fingers down his neck. I saw him close his eyes and then... 
I was pinned down on the couch. Minho was on top of me. My hands were above my head,   and Minho's pinning them down. There wast lust in his eyes; lust, hunger and and anger.
"Cassidy. Don't. Test. My. Patience!!"

He gave up.. 

We broke up.. 

We moved on and made our lives worthwile.. 

But then he calls.. I answer..  And we shared everything about ourselves. 

I was like his secretary. He was like my secretary. We know everything about each other. 

Are we now back as a couple? Or just that, friends? 

Are we doing this right? Or should I watch out?

The rain is pouring hard but the moon shines so bright that looking at it caused a a person a terrible pain in the eyes. It was Ajan and when she looked at it directly, she was reminded with how the moon used to look before, back when she still have him... he always used the moon as his metaphor. 

She misses him, but she really doesn't love him anymore.. Maybe she loves their memories, but not him... She don't know how it all faded, but everything is gone. 


"I swear." 

Ajan was writing on her journal when a letter came dashing on her window which contained a very familiar handwriting on the outside. She sneaked into the window and picked up the letter, and she seemed ro be frozen from astonishment because the letter- it was from him. She almost burned the paper in the fireplace, but something inside her told her to read it... Something is wrong. There were 3 periods on the envelope, which was Cammy's trademark or pen name when writing. 

"Cammy, why write me now?" 

She opened the envelope and saw a light brown paper that were glistening, but when she opened the letter inside it, the inks were distorted and trails of tears had almost erased them. 



________


To my Love, Mae Ajan.

			Hello, my love. How are you? I just hope that you are fine right now because if you are, then I'd be so happy to know that. 

			I miss you so much. It's been weeks already, and I miss talking to you... It's really so hard to restrain myself from taking to you because you said you wanted space. I can still feel you near me despite having you away... so away that just thinking about it makes my heart hurt more, because it longs for you... It longs to be with you. Please smile Ajan... You know how I love those smile of yours... 

			Your smile is a scenery I will never get tired of seeing for the rest of my life... I still hear your voice through distant shores. 

			I went back to our everything which has now turned to nothing- and realized what I have done to you, my love and I am very sorry for not being enough. I lacked support because I was so busy trying to support myself. I'm sorry if you felt untrusted because you know for a fact that i really don't trust humanity but believe me, I gave my entire trust to you. 

			Always and forever, I love you and I will forever entrust my heart and soul to you my angel. 

			I still can't believe that everything we ever had all vanished in front of my eyes in a split second. I just can't believe that you are gone in my life because you are the only person who can replace the sun and the moon I adore- and their beauty combined cannot surpass your beauty. So what is the purpose of my life now? You have been my source of strength, my happiness, my inspiration. This is why I was working so hard, so you can see me succeed, so I could finance you as well and we could succeed together. 

			I can't write anymore. My arms are numb now but I will still write because there are so many words left unsaid that I don't want to be stored in my heart till my very last breath. I want to pour it all out now, and say my darkest secrets, to you, my favorite human, the only one I trust. 

			I love you. 

			I'd like to start from the very beginning- do you still remember, my love when I transferred to your school and saw you? Your name really intrigued me.. Then we talked in our phones 'till 3am until our phones run out of battery. I was the happiest because you accompanied me when I was having a hard time. 

			Then we began talking at school as close friends... You even defended me from Lem, Lei and Kris when they were bullying me. 

			Because this is all I am... A nerd. And that's why people kept on hating me because just my very presence is annoying for the competitive people. 

			But you did not care.... 

			You loved me so much, and you accepted my worst sides. 

			It hurts me now that it should be written in past tense.... Because everything is all in the past now. 

			My love, do you remember what happened in August 11, 2016? Something special happened.. You got an award and I was soooo happy for you my heart started to ache I had to take my medicines right away. 

			Or do you remember September 11, 2016? This is when I confessed my love towards you through a letter and kaboom! I courted you for months and we became a couple everyone envied because we are both at the top of the class. 

			Still, the 3 bastards kept on bugging me but you were there to support me. The only friend I have back then was you, my lover. 

			No. My past lover whom I loved the most. Tell me, my love, how did we become strangers when we knew everything to each other? How can our love not last when everyone was adoring how strong we were? 

		To be honest, i love you more than I loved myself.. You were the one who picked me up from the trash where I was imprisoned. You gave luminance to the sun that once faded in my life.. 

			Because of you, I wanted to live. 

			I wanted to live.... 

			You are the best blessing I have ever had in	my life and I am so proud of you... My heart breaks more if yours does.... So please, refrain from crying. I know you are sad too... 


			Or at least I hope so. Haha

			Maybe we really aren't deserving. I don't deserve you and I don't deserve this life.

			I don't deserve a life with you.. But my love, you have accepted every ugly thing about me but why did you leave me because of them? You said you would be with me even if I become an old man. You said we'd have a beautiful family and they will be loved so much.. You said you'd never leave me... 

			In my dreams, you are mine, but in reality, you are a dream that will never come true. A dream I once had, that will forever lurk deep into my heart. 

			But if you were a dream, I'd sleep again so I can be with you. Even if it's temporary... Even if all of it is.... 

			Fake. 
			I will endure it all because I want to be with you. I'm always astound to how one person can become another's entire universe in a span of time. 

			Before I met you, I was diagnosed with depression and I was suicidal... The thoughts inside me clouded, but when you came, the sun shined, and the darkness ended. 

			More than that, i have another confession.... 



			I have a heart disease.... And by the time you are reading this, I might have gone from this world... But I have lived my life to the fullest. Thanks to you...  My temporary forever. 

			Goodbye, Love... 

			I love you. I miss you. You mean the whole world to me... Please survive... Your mental health, please take care of it better, okay? Please take care of yourself okay? 

			If I ever have the chance to relive again, I would choose to be the rain, because when we are together, it always rains.... 

			And I want to make you happy. 

			I hope I somehow managed to make you happe even once in my sad lifetime. I was happy to have lived in this world.. I was happy to have you around... Please remember that.. 


-Cam

_________

"What the actual fuck did I just read? It's so creepy I can't believe he wrote that. I refuse to believe everything I have read.Him dying? No. He is one of the strongest person I know in my life." Ajan told to herself but tears started to make the paper wet in her arms. She had noticed the pain Cammy was experiencing but she never cared to ask because she thought he was strong.

Vincent*** 

Later that night a take Colene home with smile in my face. I'm so happy I cannot put it in to words how happy I am. I was driving my car the night is so silent. But still the moon is so bright it gives the road a lighter light. And it's give me  cozy feeling.

But that silent night didn't stay that long when I stop and look at the side road I'm on the right timing as I stop. The car that made a uturn bump into the motorcycle! A loud scratch and boom in filled the air! And after that the siren of the ambulance. And that's trigger me to remember... 

My head hurt like crazy at that episode that I witnessed right before my eyes.

Something that I surely experience already.

My life in this few months rewind in my mind like I been watching a movie although is a bit faster but still I understand it.

This pass few months I see that my focus is it only in one person and its none other than Hanna Stewart at first I see that it's because of my anger. But as my memory comes back one by one I truly get it now. This is not all because of his brother. It's all because of my feelings towards Hanna.

I'm feeling so guilty for doing such a horrifying things.

I understand now why I'm being hot and cold. Cause I'm balancing my feelings but I get it Hanna comes inside in my heart that fast over and over again.

This is not happening but it is...

I love you...

Fuck!

I love her! For Pete sake! Why did I do a lot of horrible things to her! But we're ok now right? I will definitely made this right. From now on!

I didn't notice my tears flows and now I'm crying like stupid inside my car. Crying and smiling!

I remember completely the first time I call her earth. I remember saving her a lot of times kissing her and hurt her.

I close my eyes and the noise of the car at my back made me decide to drive my car to her house.
********
Hanna***

I been rolling a hundred times in my bed but it's already pass eleven still I can sleep. I already count a thousand sheep but my eyes still wide wake. 

This is because of Vincent. I been thinking about him since a lay down in my bed. And he doesn't want me to sleep. V what are you doing to me? 
You make me cry a lot of times but you still make me happy after all. 

I heard my phone ring and when I saw Vincent is in the other line i calm my nerves before answering. 

Earth sorry.. 

She smiled because of that. 

You don't have to say sorry I'm still not sleeping idiot. 
She hear Vincent laugh. 

Do you want me to sing you a song so you can sleep? 

She smile again. Is that your way to say thank you for our surprise birthday party for you? 

He laugh again and said. Sort of... 
So be it V. 

...

~~~Sorry
Is all that you can't say
Years gone by and still
Words don't come easily
Like sorry like sorry

~~~~Forgive me
Is all that you can't say
Years gone by and still
Words don't come easily
Like forgive me forgive me

But you can say baby
Baby can I hold you tonight?
Maybe if I told you the right words
At the right time you'd be mine

~~~	I love you
Is all that you can't say
Years gone by and still
Words don't come easily
Like I love you I love you

But you can say baby
Baby can I hold you tonight?
Maybe if I told you the right words
Ooh, at the right time you'd be mine

Baby can I hold you tonight?
Maybe if I told you the right words
At the right time you'd be mine

You'd be mine

You'd be mine~~~
......

As she heard Vincent singing she feel how sincere he is in every word come out from his mouth. And he has a beautiful voice a smooth and lovely. Every one can hear him surely will fall for his voice.
Earth I'm sorry I've done a lot of bad things to you. 
I smile and it's OK. 
Earth can you forgive me for all bad things that I've done to you? 

I smile again. 
It's nothing V I forgive you already. 
I don't know if I'm on the right time but still I want to say it.. 
Vincent you make me nervous what is happening to you. 
Nothing don't worry. I'm sure as hell that I'm not in trouble now. 
A bit silent.. 

Earth do you know why I proceed to call you that endearment?

I shook my head even if I know he cannot see me.

Because I mean it your my Earth indeed. I think I cannot revolve now without you. 

I instantly stop breathing.
Do you know that my memory comes back now? 
I still don't move. 

Earth you still there?

My tears are flowing I can say anything.

Fuck! Earth are you crying? I'm here outside of your house please I want to see you...

I run immediately as I hear what he say. And indeed Vincent is standing at the side of his car. Staring and waiting for me. I slowly walk closer but Vincent walk fast closer to me and instantly hug me.

Tightly... So tight...

Earth?
Hmm
Sorry
Hmm
Forgive me
Hmm
I love you...
Hmm
Can you be mine...

I push him as his word process my brain.

What did you say? 

Sorry can you forgive me? 
I love you can you be mine? 
But if you're not ready I can wait just let me hold you for tonight huh? 

Vincent hug me back and I don't know why but I hug him too. 

His been murmuring over and over again how sorry he was. 

I love you earth I'm really sorry.

Why does I feel that his talking about something?

I'm planning a big revenge to his brother so using her is the perfect way to broke him. And loving her is not on my plan but I fuck up big time when I feel sudden fast beat inside of my freaking chest...

........
I'm  apoplectic since I saw her picture. 

It's seven in the evening when this info come up into me. 
I waste money for this damn. 

I'm sitting comfortably in our living room with my sister and Trish my current girlfriend. 
tsk... 

With this fucking sister's picture of my consider enemy since he messed up with my sister. 
With her information and whole thing about her. 

I doubt if I fail. 

So this is his sister... 
Hanna Stewart nice name to play with.. 

This anger and excitement raise hell up  inside of me. 

She has a long brown wavy hair
from her almond shape face to her cute emerald eyes down to her perfect not so pointed nose then at last to her red lips. 
I bet its soft like marshmallow.. 
I laughed in my head  like an idiot. 

I stare again on it like their's no tommorow 
I feel my heart skip a bit and why  do I feel sudden pain in it.
until realize what I'm doing and shake my head. 
I can not be attracted to her no not a million way.

Takeshi is sitting on the couch of Aiko's room at the hospital. Beside him is Mr. Waseda. Both men are sitting in similar way, elbows on top of knees supporting hands that covers noses, eyes looking at Aiko who is sleeping, but minds are having their own thoughts. They've been doing it for more than twenty minutes.

Mr. Waseda is the first one who sighs and moves. He pats Takeshi's shoulder to comfort him. "I'm sure she only had cold feet and panic attack," Mr. Waseda says to him. "Her dream is to marry you. There is no way she's backing out," he continues. "You do still want to marry her, don't you ?"

Takeshi nods. "I won't back out my decision."

"Good. Once she wakes up, we can talk nicely to her and set out another date of your we.."

"I don't want to marry him," suddenly Aiko's weak voice cuts her father's words.

"My dear.. you got to be kidding," Mr. Waseda says at the same time with Takeshi's surprised words, "You're awake!"

"Father.. I need to speak with Takeshi in private, please," Aiko says to her father as a request for him to leave. Mr. Waseda fulfills it without any objection. Takeshi stands up awkwardly. Once Mr. Waseda closes the door, Aiko smiles softly to Takeshi.

"Would you sit next to me here ?" she asks. Takeshi comes close to her and sits on the edge of the bed. Aiko hugs him tight as Takeshi hugs her back.

"Thank you," she whispers.

"For what ?"

"For pretending to love me all this time"

Takeshi loses his words. "What.. what did you mean ?" He finally able to ask only after few seconds of dumbfounded.

Aiko rubs his chest and smiles. "When I went to your apartment, I found your small notebook. I was so curious what was its content, so I read it. One thing that attracted me was a page about your promises to your ex."

Aiko then lays her head to Takeshi's shoulder before she continues, "At first I didn't notice anything weird. But then I went to your website and found out that you often asked your fans' supports so you can keep on facing your days with smile. It is one of your promises to her, right ?" She speaks with a very calm tone as if she is telling him a story she read in a book. Takeshi can only nods vaguely to confirm it.

"Despite knowing that you still keep your promise to your ex, I really didn't know the reason. I also didn't know why you approached me and became my boyfriend. I just thought that maybe I am just your love trains."

"I'm really sorry.." Takeshi whispers full of guilty. "I only wanted you to be happy. You were saying that you would be happier if we're officially dated.."

"I was happy. I didn't care whether you really love me or you making me love trains. To have you as my boyfriend was a dream come true. Even more when you asked me to marry you," Aiko continues with a smile that loses her eyes.

"I thought.. you were really in love with me back then. You really are a great actor, you know.. or maybe, I'm just naive.."

"I didn't act to you.."

"Come on.. you only wanted marry me because of your deal with my father, didn't you ?"

"No, I wasn't .."

"I knew it all, Honey.. I knew you made a deal with my father to have a relationship with me as an exchange for your career support," Aiko cuts him. There is no slice of anger or hurt in her tone. Aiko even embraces Takeshi tighter, making herself more comfortable in his arms. Once again, Takeshi is dumbfounded.

"The new medicine they've given me makes me sleep restlessly. I've been easily awaken by a small distraction when I sleep. But since I was so weak, I usually couldn't open my eyes right away. In that state, I overheard many things.."

"One time, I heard my father cried on the phone. He thanked you for willing to marry me. He said he promised he would guarantee your success and your wealthiness. It was few days after you asked me to marry you. I was so hurt that time, knowing you wanted to marry me over money. I was so disgust of you, I wanted to cancel our engangement. But then, I had a second thought. Whatever your reason was.. I had my dream come true, to marry you. To have you as my husband. So what if you only marry me over money ? I love you, and I believed that with time you would love me, too. But I was so angry and confused to receive your care and attention. How could you act so good ? You were so patient dealing with my angers. You accompanied me and bearing with my emotions through out my chemo sessions. You even postponed a lot of your works. That's what most confused me. If you were eager to reach success, why would you decide to postpone it just to accompany me ?"

"That's because.. I've never after for success," Takeshi finally able to speak. "You are right, but you are also wrong. I .. I did made a deal with your father, but it's not like you thought."

"So.. what is it ?"

Takeshi exhales heavily. "My mom had a heart failure. She needed a new heart and I couldn't afford it. Your father offered his help. He didn't want me to repay him the money. He just wanted me to make you happy. And the only way to make you happy is to be with you." 

Aiko raises her head so she can see Takeshi's face. His face is red with eyes holding back tears. "So.. I broke up with my girlfriend and be with you to save my mother. Your father insisted to help my career as a bonus. It had never been in the agreement."

"So.. my father did forced you to marry me?"

Takeshi shakes his head slowly then smiles at her. "He has never forced me. His requirement was just for me to make sure that you are happy. He never told me to officially date you, even less marry you. I did it on my own decision."

"But why ?"

"To make you happy.."

Aiko nods. "Because I'm dying, right.. ?"

Takeshi bulges his eyes. "What ? You know.. ? How..." 

Aiko places her head on his shoulder again. "I overheard your conversation with Doctor Tanaka. It was after I fainted at our pre-wedding photoshoot. I only got four months left at that time, he said."

Takeshi skips a sob. "No.. you will be fine.."

"Don't lie to me, Hon.. I know my time will come soon," Aiko once again raises her head to meet his eyes. "That is why I don't want to marry you."

"But.."

"Before I knew I was dying, I was so selfish. I knew you didn't love me.. you still don't love me, do you ? I knew it, but still I wanted to have you. I saw you typing message to your ex, pretending to be Hiroshi and told her that you will keep facing your day with a smile no matter what. It broke my heart tremendously. We were so closed for being married. I thought that somehow you started to love me. But, instead you still kept your promise to her. But I still kept being selfish. As long as I have you, that will be fine."

"..."

"But after I knew about my condition, I started to think differently. While I still wanted to be with you for the rest of my life, I also considered your future."

"Then marry me.. we still have few months together.."

Aiko shakes her head. Tears are falling on her face. "I can't be selfish. Al though you don't love me, but you are so kind to me. Al though you lied to me, but it is the sweetest lie. I can't torture you any longer.."

"Aiko, I am willing to marry you.."

"Do you know what kind of marriage you will get through ? You will only being my nurse. I can't serve you as your wive, not in kitchen or on bed. My health will be dropping low any time soon, you will be busy taking care of me and your life will be miserable."

"I don't mind.."

"I do. I mind a lot seeing you sacrificing your future for me." Aiko rubs his cheek softly. "You've done enough, my love. Al though you never loved me, you have made me felt being loved. And I can't thank you enough for that. For these last nine months, you have give me happiness that I could not even imagine. You gave me reason to live, to fight the cancer. But now, I'm sinking. And I don't want you to sink with me."

"Aiko-chan.."

Aiko wipes her tears that continues to fall. "I want you to leave me. Never see me again."

"Aiko-chan.. I am willing to accompany you.."

"No.. i don't want you to. I want you to leave me, only having beautiful memories about me. I don't want you to suffer with me. That will ruin your memories of me. Don't you get it ?"

Takeshi nods few times. His face is ugly having tears and snots all over.

"Don't worry. I will make sure you still have support for your career."

"I don't need that."

"I know. But I want you to have that. I will tell my father that you have done your part perfectly. That I am very happy because of you. So, he surely will keep his promise to you."

Takeshi kisses her. "I'm.. I'm sorry.. I wish.. I can love you," he says with chokes and sobs. Aiko shakes her head gently. "That's okay, love," she says gently then kisses him. "I love you. Remember that." She seals it with another kiss.

It is 2000, where social media hasn't born yet, we go for internet by dial-up modem or internet cafe, and Korean hasn't ruled the entertainment world. It is where a simple Taiwanese day dreamer girl, Xiao Ping, falls completely in love with a Japanese super star, Hasegawa Takeshi. Thus she decides to chase her love. One event after another, coincident by coincident happens during her effort. Eventually, will she ever wake up from her dream or keep on chasing her dream lover until it comes true ?

A few more months go by,  the babies are almost one now. I spend a lot of time with them and even Ichiru. There are nights I still can't sleep fully so I visit him. Nothing has taken place, since that kiss months ago. I just lay on the other side, knowing he is there next to me, makes me feel calm. It makes me able to sleep better. I haven't gotten the courage or feelings to do anything more with him.    In many ways, I feel like I am betraying Zero just by being next to Ichiru. I know Zero wanted this, it just feels strange to me.

As I am getting the daily mail, I find a brown envelope addressed to me, inside it's my divorce papers. I feel a sigh of relief at least one part of this mess is over. I am free of Joel.  It wasn't like the first time where I dwelled on it, this time I even forgot about it. The papers coming to me, without me even checking on things. I had no urge to remarry. No urge for anything this time. I was just taking things as they came.

Ichiru comes home from work and I show him the papers. I see a relief wash over him. 

"I am so glad this went without a hitch. I wasn't too sure when he was standing him last time we talked to him. It just seems he let it go." Ichiru admits.

"He really didn't have a choice, did he?" I answer.

"Are you happy about it this time?" Ichiru asks.

"Yes, I am glad it's over. It's sad in a way it had to happen all over again, but at least now it's done. He has made the girls come over more and doesn't drop them off like he used to. He was just using that to see me. Once he saw you were here and I wanted a divorce he stopped that. That has made things easier as well." I state.

"Yes, I have noticed that also. He also saw I moved in, so it helped with him realizing things were over. I think tonight I am going to give you a break and take the twins to the park. I think you need some alone time just for yourself. You can relax, sleep take a long bath. Whatever you need." Ichiru says.

"That would be great. Thank you so much. You are always here when I need you, I can't thank you enough." I reply.

"You don't have to. I love being here and I love the twins. You already know how I feel about you." Ichiru answers with a smile

"Yes, I do." I smile back.

Ichiru takes the twins out, leaving me alone. I haven't been alone in a while it feels nice. I am going to do what he suggested and relax.  I need it, it's been a long eleven months. I head upstairs to the bath where I get in just relaxing with the warm bubbles surrounding me. I close my eyes and just relax for a bit. The quiet feels so good. I stay in there for at least thirty minutes, then getting out and walking to my room, where everything is still the same. I walk over and slide my damp feet into Zero's slippers  Sliding on his white dress shirt that still smells of his cologne. I just take the smell of him in, still missing him very much.  

Tonight I just want to let go and be close to you.  I slide into bed, under the covers placing your pillow long ways to hug as if it was you. I hold it close, closing my eyes. You on my mind and in my heart fully.

I haven't felt this way in a long time, finally calm enough to do this. Without breaking into tears, I drift off to dreamland in no time. 

I hold the pillow close, it just doesn't feel like a pillow anymore. It feels like you. Your warm slender body that I always wanted to snuggle up to, always wanted near me. No matter how upset I was with you, I still needed you close.

I can swear I feel your arms around me, it feels like heaven. I open my eyes to your pale chest. It can't be, I close my eyes, scared that if I look up at your neck, its going to be Ichiru.  I just know I need to see what is going on, so I reopen my eyes looking up at your sweet neck. I see the tattoo that I have come to know and love. I look up at your face, into those lavender eyes that I can never forget.

"Zero? Is it really you?" I ask.

"Yes, babe it's me really me. You finally let go enough that our connection was still strong to come through." Zero says.

"Does this mean you can stay? I have you back?" I say sitting up on top of him.

"No babe, it's just in a dream state. I am dead in both of our worlds. There is nowhere to go. Your connection is so strong to me, you still can bring me here." Zero answers.

"God I miss you so much! Why did you do this? Why leave me this way, why not tell me the truth?" I say holding him so tight

"I know you do, I miss you as well. I know you don't understand why I did this but you will. The ten years I gave back to you, to have what you always really wanted even if it's not with me." Zero states

" If you love me as you say, how can you just throw our life to your brother? Your just handing me over to him. Any feelings I start to feel towards him makes me feel like I am betraying you." I reply.

" I know how much you love me. Really love me.  You gave me so much, and I want to give that back to you. I can't be jealous of him having you or the life that was mine. I did have it and there were a lot of things I wish I did differently that I know he will. He can love you fully, never hurting you. You just need to open yourself up to it.  Don't think of it as betraying me, your not. I watched him for many years, I know how you feel about me, he feels about you. I believe together you can make a wonderful life. Making both of you happy. I love you both and want that for you. I don't want to be selfish like I was when I was alive. When I first came here all I thought about was myself, the life you gave me I didn't want to end. When it did, I finally saw so much more, I loved you fully and I know you always have me. I just wish I could have offered that to you sooner. Instead of chasing a dream." Zero explains.

"I don't know Zero, I think the only reason I have any feelings towards him, is because he looks like you. I find myself staring at him, thinking of you. That's not being fully there or being true." I admit.

"No, it's not but in a way, Ichiru knows this. He knows how much you love me, he hated me for it. But him looking like me, is giving you everything you want rolled into one. Even if at first that's how your feelings start, you will see past that with the way he treats you. And how much he loves you will win over." Zero answers.

"I do see how much he cares how much he will do anything to make me feel better. I see myself in him, and its why I don't want to hurt him." I reply.

"That's another thing. You know how it feels so you will think before hurting him. Its what makes you both perfect for each other." Zero responds.

"I still wish you wouldn't have did it this way. I would love to still be able to be Mrs. Kiryu. To be able to lay next to you when the time comes." I say.

"You still will be Mrs. Kiryu. And even if no one knows I exist you will always be my wife. You don't understand why but you will. I see the bigger picture, I left it all up to you to start over again." Zero states.

"And if i don't want to? How about If i want to come with you? I don't want to be here." I answer.

"Babe, I love you but you can't. That would only mean we would both be dead. Not in your world or in the anime world. I do not want that. You have so much to live for. I left two children so you would go on. I thought that would help you push through." Zero confesses.

"No! IT doesn't. It just made me hurt more knowing they won't know you. You took all the memories away from our son. Do you know how much that hurts me?" I spat.

"He will remember as he gets older, the memories are still in his mind. I know you wanted to have more children with me, so I gave you our daughter. I know I can't be there to raise her, even though I would love to. I do know she is in the best hands and will turn out wonderful as our son did." Zero answers.

"I am glad you're sure of all this because I not. It's even more painful than when you ...went with Yuki. "I  admit.

"It will be fine, everything will be. You just need to let go, and let things happen." Zero comments.

"I can't just forget you, I can't just act like you never existed. You were and are all I ever wanted." I say.

"I know and it makes me happy to know this. You don't have to forget just open up to new things. I will be here when its all over if you still want me. Just when that time comes, you may not want to." Zero announces.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"When it is your time, I can come to get you and we can be together. If that is what you still want.  Just now live your life and be happy." Zero says.

"Why would you ever think I wouldn't still want that?" I say.

"You may want to go with someone else. You may find things better than they were with me." Zero states.

"I want to be with you. I will always want to be with you." I answer.

"Then we have a deal. I will come back when that time comes. Now you live and enjoy things. Promise me?" Zero comments

"Ok, I want to be with you now, I want you to hold me, to touch me. " I respond.

"We can do that, but you will have t ogo back," Zero says.

"Not now, in a bit. " I answer kissing his lips.

This about you, waking up in Yuki's body. You finally are able to see what Zero is all about. To be with him. Is it all you ever wanted? Will, it last When he finds out your not her? Or will he run back to her? What if you could bring Zero into the real world, make him live a real life? Would he accept it? Or miss everything about his old life?

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