Just stories written while im on the toilet or in the restroom in general

Hello WebNovel Readers,

"Your Potty Partner" is the new-age way to get your daily dose of Adult humor, anytime, anywhere - with WebNovel's easy-to-use app and website. 

Don’t blush: 80 percent of the mobile users admit to using their phones in the bathroom. 

'Add This Book to your collection' - for your next bathroom visit: check out the latest added Jokes to pass the time during your next extended reign on the throne.

These adult jokes are guaranteed to put a cheeky smile on your face. You can also share your own jokes in the "comments section - below the chapters".

Have Fun!!



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Kitty looks down at Ketan and sees that he is doing well after having the demon come out of his body. She sighs and takes a step out of the room. She moves back to her bedroom. She starts to feel completely drained and curls up on the bed. The mark on her side heats up and finally gives her the pain that usually comes with being marked by another being. She grabs the blanket underneath her and holds back her screams. Once the demon's mark of powers flowed through her body she relaxes but is unable to move yet. Unable to tell how long it has been she tries to open her eyes weakly.
Ketan woke up alone in the room and got up and went downstairs feeling a million times lighter than before. He saw that everyone but Kitty was at the table having lunch. "Where is Kitty? She should be eating with you guys."
"Ketan, how much do you know about demons? I know a lot about fox demons but I am talking about the other kind of demons." Cindy looks at Ketan and asks this right away.
"I know way too much about them. Why are you asking…..no she did not." Ketan thought about the past and thought back to how Kitty would talk to both his father and Asmoday. It was only when he would come around they would switch to telepathy. He disappears from the kitchen and appears by Kitty's side and he can smell the demon's mark on her. "KITTY! WHAT. DID. YOU. DO?!?!"
Kitty kept her eyes closed, "I made a deal with Asmoday many moons ago. The deal has become in effect. If I did not then people would've died and I stopped that from happening. Asmoday will come to me in eight years to collect what he wants from me." As she was laying there she felt that she should get up so she struggled to get out of the bed.
"A fool no matter what you do." Ketan grabs her arm and takes her to the bathroom.
"Yes, but I am a wise fool for someone so young." Kitty felt a liquid leaking between her legs, "Ketan get Cindy up here and fast please." She held onto the counter and looked at her reflection in the glass. Ketan left the room to go and grabbed Cindy who was pacing at the bottom of the stairs. "Cindy, Kitty is calling for you."
"She is pushing herself so hard I had hoped that with her carrying a child it would calm her down but I guess that is just like her." Cindy rushed up the stairs, "Ketan, I might need you to go to Leo and bring him home."
Ketan followed her up the stairs. "I can and will do as you ask." He stopped outside the bedroom door but did not enter the room.
Cindy rushed into the room and looked at the bed then went to the bathroom. "Kitsune, how are you feeling?"
"Ukemochi, I think the water has broken and there is a different type of cramping in my stomach." Kitty looked pale and was holding on to the ledge of the counter. 
"Lay down on the floor and I will touch your stomach to see how close your contractions are." Cindy grabbed a towel and placed it on the ground to hold Kitty's head on the floor. 
Kitty laid down on the ground and placed her head on the towel. She started breathing a little more deeply and tried to make herself comfortable. 
Cindy placed her hand on the belly and felt the intervals of the contractions. "Your water definitely broke. It won't be much longer until the baby is born. Breathe in and out as we practiced. I will tell Ketan to get Leo here." Cindy got up and went to the door. "Ketan go get Leo and bring him home and ask Anna to come here."
Ketan walked downstairs and found Anna in the laundry room. "Anna, Cindy is asking for you can you go upstairs? Oh, and she is in Leo and Kitty's room."
"Of course I will go up right away!" Anna grabbed a stack of soft but older towels and brought them to the room and entered the bathroom. "I brought the towels that you have asked for."
Ketan left the house and went to Leo and company.
Leo and the group had finished with the first place with ease and didn't find anything that could be of any use to them and went to the second place. Leo found a room that had information about werewolves and that surprised him. As they were not normally informative about their information. "This is unusual."
"There is heavy blood in this room. I am willing to bet that the owners of these books are dead. It is a pity that it has happened but that is beyond me. I want these books brought back to your place if it is possible. I do not want them to reach the wrong hands again." Carlos touches the spines of one of the books. 
"Yes, I agree with you, Carlos. I was planning on bringing all these books back to my place. I do not want them to fall into the wrong hands. Let's work on packing these up and head to the third place." Leo started to help pack up the books.
Ketan appeared in the room and smelled the blood. "It smells like a bloodbath in this room. Leo, I have been asked to bring you back to the house." 
"Alright, I will come back with you. I'll ask that the three of you finish packing this room and bring the books back to my place. We will finish the house searches tomorrow." Leo got up and looked at Ketan.
"The baby is on the way so I will come back and help finish packing up this place. I feel amazing and Sylvie, I remember that part of my past once again." Ketan touches Leo's shoulder and takes him back to the house. They arrive at the door and they hear the baby's cries. 
Leo enters the room and goes to the bathroom. "Sorry, I am late love."
"Congratulations Leo, you are a proud father of a ….." Cindy was cleaning the baby off and was saying this as Leo rushed to Kitty's side.


Will she hunt him or will he hunt her? Kitty is a demon with powers beyond belief. She goes through life alone and has suffered many losses but nothing could prepare her for falling for someone who is meant to hunt and kill her kind. Leo a hunter sworn to change the paths of the hunter association must make the choice of hunting the one whom has captured his heart or turning his back on his way of life. 

Neither of them expected that the one night they spent together would change both their lives forever. 

From attraction to the desperate desire of want, this unlikely couple will face all obstacles to fight the systems in place for centuries. The forbidden love of a hunter and his prey. Will Leo and Kitty be able to protect what is theirs or will they lose it all?

Entrance, Outer Gate, Blue Bells Villa 
The blue Bentley stopped at the entrance and Sara hurriedly got off as Allen watched her every move. Without turning back, she got into her private jeep and she drove off. The gate closed automatically upon its departure. Allen finally broke his silence. 
"Dad, why did you let her go?" he looked at Steward Leo with disbelief, "It is still dangerous."
"Allen", Steward Leo spoke in a deep voice, "Sara  never needed your sympathy or support to move on."
"Dad, I..." Allen tried to refute his words. 
"That's enough", the old man rudely cut him off, "Now go. Do not come back unless you are needed."
Allen sighed deeply and frowned when he saw his Dad get off the car. Then, he gestured the chauffeur to drive him away. Allen could only sigh helplessly.
...
By then, Sara had already driven in her jeep through the main gate and entered the Villa's compound. She stopped the jeep in front of the doorsteps. She hopped down from the jeep and hurried inside. The living room was a little messy. The cushions from the sofa were mauled over the floor. In the kitchen, the bowl of vegetables was still sitting in the kitchen sink. She slowed down her steps when she saw some blood spilled on the kitchen floor. It was her blood. She inched closer and squatted down next to it. The blood had dried but the raspy, rusty smell attacked her olfactory senses. Bloodlust swept through her body and she hurriedly stood up to calm herself. She took a deep breath and rushed upstairs to her room. 
For now, she thought of settling down for a comfortable and warm shower. She entered her room. It had a sea blue hue as its backdrop. Opposite her door, there was her bookshelf. Most of the books were crawling on the floor now. She could not be bothered about those now. The round bed sat cold in the center. On its left side was her dressing table and opposite to it was her closet. On the right side of the bed was the pink side drawer. A pink lampshade sat on it. Beside it was the bathroom door. She walked up to it and pushed it open. She switched on the geyser and set aright temperature for her warm shower.
Sara stepped out of the bathroom and mauled her hair over her right shoulder. It revealed the bare caramel skin of her neck. Her neck was bare of any accessories. Her hands reached behind her back and she deftly unzipped the gown. The gown slid down her body and landed softly on the floor. Within minutes, she got rid of her undergarments and quickly entered the bathroom.
She switched off the geyser but did not immediately turn on the shower. Instead, she moved inside and stood in front of the mirror placed above the washbasin. She looked at her tousled expression in the reflection. Her reflection seemed to mock her endlessly. She sighed and turned on the shower. She stood with her back facing the shower. The warm water showered down her long hair and traveled down her bare skin. She planned to wash away her thoughts along with the shower. She closed her eyes.
...
"If I get lost someday, you will find me, right?" the young girl in two pigtails asked the cute, smiling boy beside her.
"I will find you. I promise, I will", the boy smiled and gave her a peck on the cheek.
The girl blushed and smiled as she fidgeted with her fingers. With a tiny smile on her chubby face, she asked, "Promise?"
"Promise", the boy grabbed her palms as a peck landed on his cheek. His face broke into an adorable smile.
...
"I kept my promise, didn't I?"
"I don't think our relationship was that of friendship."
"You are just hiding your feelings, Sara. You are lying."
...
Riley's words kept echoing in her mind. Her eyes flew open. Her breathing became unstable and she was feeling dizzy. The wound on her forehead had not even completely healed and the continuous flow of water made her wound open up. The warm blood flowed down her cheek and dropped on the cold bathroom floor. She finally couldn't take it anymore. So, she quickly turned off the shower and pulled out a towel from the wardrobe. She dried herself with it and wrapped it around her torso.
Then, she swiftly moved to stand in front of the washbasin. With great difficulty, she removed the bangs stuck on her forehead. Then, she grabbed the hand towel hanging by the basin and soaked it under the cold water running out of the faucet. She roughly pressed the towel against her forehead and grabbed the basin with her left hand. She closed her eyes. She removed the bloodied towel and saw that her forehead was not bleeding anymore. So, she tossed the towel into the washer and walked out of the bathroom. She sat on the bed facing the side drawer and pulled out the last closet. She reached for the first aid box and pulled it out. Her eyes fell on a silver box placed inside. She stared at it for a while before shoving the closet inside.
Sara sighed deeply and moved on the opposite side of the bed. She started applying an ointment on the wound her forehead by looking at her reflection on it. Finally, she bandaged it. She placed the first-aid box inside the drawer and avoided sneaking glances at the silver box even if she wanted to. She picked up a random dress and put it on. It was a simple, knee-length dress, light green.
Then, her eyes fell on the books lying in a mess on the floor due to last night's shock wave. She sighed again and went ahead to tidy them up. When she was about to start picking, the book covers caught her attention. They seemed to fit in like jigsaw pieces. Instead of picking them up, she started arranging them on the floor itself. The pieces seemed to fit in. Almost all the pieces were arranged, making it look like a giant jigsaw puzzle. But, it seemed like a single piece or a book was missing. Sara stood up and walked up to the bookshelf. She rummaged through the few books left on the shelf and pulled out one of them. She placed it as the missing piece and it perfectly fit in.
The first point was that these books were all about different scientific studies and theories. Then, why did they have such strange covers instead of the original ones? Why didn't she notice them before? The second point was that the puzzle pieced to form an abstract painting of a woman. She found the painting familiar. She had seen it somewhere but failed to remember it.

Warning: If you want to earn EXP, don't do it at the expense of my novel. ANY ZERO CHAPTER REVIEW  BE DELETED BY ME!
 
"Come at me with all your might. I will silence your cries at the expanse of night."

Sara James~ 23-year-old CEO, filthy rich, capable, arrogant, elegant, sharp and deadly dangerous!
Riley Brown~ 25- year-old, charismatic, wild natured, cool, carefree and the nation's prince!
She has a secret covering 7 years of her life.
He... is rather mysterious when it comes to dealing with life! They were not meant to be. But 'ENCOUNTERS' do happen!

"As a lady, have you ever chased a guy, so passionately and so romantically before?" she spoke as she twirled in front of the camera like a professional vlogger.
He amusedly tossed the camera away. It landed quietly on the velvet sofa. Then, with one swift movement, he lifted her and made her seat on the kitchen counter. 
He had his arms hooked tight around her waist. He slowly leaned closer and she closed her eyes in anticipation. But, instead of a kiss, she heard a hoarse whisper right beside her ear, "As a lady, have you been desired so much by a man before?"
Hearing his suggestive word, she blushed. Then, she prodded her forefinger and jabbed his chest in an attempt to push him away, "Mr. Brown, isn't it going out of the script?"
Saying so, she jumped down but was held back and pushed into a corner. He aimed at her lips, nibbling them gently, "Mrs. Brown, don't you like when it's out of the script?" 
"Mmm-hmm", she moaned, enjoying the kiss.


---
Hey, there! Greetings from the author. Mind you, I am a student... So, I may miss some updates. Hereby, I diligently apologize early!



Cover by WEBNOVEL

It was 6 PM in the evening, and Roy was finished up with his paperwork. But, even after that, he had a prior appointment with the guests from Xing. So to visit them, Roy and Riza went to the hotel where the Xingese guests were staying.

They were in their car where Roy and Riza were sitting at the back seat and two soldiers were sitting at the front seat. There was small glass window in between the front seat and back seat, just because Roy had the privileges of a General now. Because Roy and Riza now had a little bit of privacy, Roy asked, "How is the search going on?"

"Search operation in the East city and its nearby area is over. From tomorrow onward, the search team will be operating in the smaller towns. I have ordered them to search in my hometown first," Riza replied and then continued after a small pause, "I don't know why, but I have a feeling that Oli will be there."

Roy held her hand to give her some assurance and said, "Don't worry, we will find him."

Riza looked at Roy and smiled. They were sitting very close to each other, and Riza was looking into Roy's eyes with a smile. Roy felt like the young Roy falling in love again in those amber eyes. He approached Riza as if he had no control of his body at that moment. He was about to kiss her, but before he could come any closer, Riza cleared her throat and Roy snapped out of his uncontrolled actions. Roy quickly sat properly and started looking out of the window on his side. "Ed found Master's book," Roy informed.

"The one you lost?" Riza asked.

"Of course, how many master's books do I have?" Roy replied.

"A few years back, I heard from General Hughes that you were searching for the other three books as well," Riza said.

"Yes, but I gave up the search long ago. After all, there are more important things than those books," Roy clarified.

And in the meantime, the car stopped. They had reached the hotel where the Xingese guests were staying. Roy and Riza got out of the vehicle and went inside the hotel while the other two soldiers stayed in the car. They went to the room where the guests were staying which was on the second floor of that building. There were 2 Amestrian soldiers guarding at the front door of that room. When the soldiers saw Roy and Riza, they saluted them. Roy nodded to acknowledge and then pressed the doorbell. They waited for some time to open the door, but there was no response, not even the maid who was allotted to serve the Xingese guests opened it.

Roy pressed the doorbell and knocked at the door multiple times, but there was no response. So, Roy looked at the two soldiers who were guarding the room. "Did they leave for somewhere?" Roy asked.

"No Sir. We haven't moved from our positions, and we didn't see anyone coming out of the room," One soldier replied.

Roy got angry and pulled out his ignition gloves from his shirt's lower pocket, and put them on. Watching that, the two soldiers gulped out of fear. They thought Roy was going to burn them, but they were confused about why Riza was standing so calm and not trying to stop the General.

Roy snapped and both the soldiers closed their eyes, but when they didn't feel any burn, they opened their eyes and found out that the door was no more there. In fact, Roy and Riza were also not present there. So, they looked inside the room and saw Roy and Riza were inside the huge room to figure out what was happening. Roy was ready with his gloves on while Riza had pulled out her handgun. The other two soldiers also followed them inside with their rifles ready.

The room was pretty clean and everything was in place, but there was no noise or any kind of sound as well which could give them any hint that someone was in the room. Roy looked at the soldiers, and ordered, "You two, go left and check if someone is there."

Both the soldier went to the left side of the huge room which was a big bedroom with an attached bathroom. There were a total of three bedrooms like that in the room which had attached bathrooms. Roy and Riza went to the bedroom on the right side. Both the parties searched the rooms thoroughly but they were unable to find a single person. It was as if they vanished somewhere.

Roy and Riza then proceeded toward the final bedroom. Both were on guard to face any incoming danger. They were taking each step with caution and paying very close attention to their surroundings. But, even that room was abnormally silent and everything in that room was in place. They searched the whole room and were about to have a look into the bathroom whose door was closed. And then suddenly they heard some sound from inside the bathroom. Riza quickly pointed her gun toward the bathroom door. The door to the bathroom then slowly opened.

They were expecting someone unknown coming out of the bathroom, but it was Hu Zemin, the political advisor of Ling. He came out of the bathroom as if he woke up just a few moments ago. When he saw Riza pointing her gun at him and Roy raising his hand to snap, he was startled and raised his hands.

Roy looked at him with narrowed eyes. "Mr. Zemin!" He exclaimed.

"Yes?" Hu smiled with a scarred face.

Roy and Riza calmed down and lowered their weapons. And after everything was under control, Roy and Hu sat on the sofa in the hall. "Where did everyone go?" Roy inquired.

Hu sighed and answered, "I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know? Everyone from Xing disappeared somewhere and you are telling me you don't know?" Roy shouted.

"They drugged me Mr. Mustang….and put me in the bathroom. When I woke up I found this letter next to me," Hu handed over the letter to Roy. When Roy opened it, he saw the letter was written in Xingese language, and no Amestrian present there could read Xingese.

"What is written in this letter?" Roy asked

"It's an apology for drugging me. They have also written not to worry about their whereabout, and that they are fine," Hu replied.

Roy still had some suspicion over Hu, so he put the letter in his pocket to verify whether Hu told him the truth or not. Then he questioned, "Are the Yin-Yang twins also with Ling?"

"May be," Hu answered.

Roy and Riza then stood up and took Hu to Central command in order to ask him some more questions.

Meanwhile somewhere in a passenger train going to the Eastern Area, Ling, Lan Fan, and the Yin-Yang twins were in one of the compartments. "I can't believe you drugged Hu," Ling looked at Yin and laughed out loud.

"I thought he will pose a problem if we tell him where we are going," Yin replied calmly.

"Yeah, even I don't like him. He is kind of boring… by the way, If whatever you said is true, then Krid Novak will not try to hurt us," Ling said.

"But my brother here will try his luck again," Yin sighed.

"This time I am stronger than ever," Yang intervened.

"You told me that the last time, and what did you return with? A scar on your eye?" Yin mocked.

Ling placed his hand on Yang's shoulder and said, "Don't worry Yang, you are not alone this time. Although I am not going to help you kill him."

"I don't need your help," Yang gently removed Ling's hand from his shoulder.

"Why are we even going there? I mean what if we get into unnecessary trouble, and the emperor finds about it. He might punish us," Lan Fan said.

Everyone looked at Lan Fan for a moment with narrowed eyes, then they ignored whatever she said and again started discussing. Looking at that, Lan Fan sighed out of frustration and sat on her seat looking out of the window.


Roy and Riza have a son, named Oliver whom they have hidden from the world. Oliver has grown knowing that Roy is his father, but he never got to know about his mother. When Riza decides to reveal that she is his mother, something terrible happens. Meanwhile, someone in Drachma is finally stepping into Amestris with his deadly army, now that he knows Father is dead.

Find out, whether Oliver will ever know, who is his mother. And will Riza ever get to listen, the word "Mother" or "Mom", from her son's mouth. And what has Father left behind, which can bring down his own legacy. And what is the role of Oliver in all these events. Is he the key to save Amestris or he is the doom?

Hi I am Grace a tall girl with curly dark hair that likes to read,and when I say read I mean to read ALOT. "Grace you must stop reading those books!"Hollered Susan."we are going to be late!"
"Susan!" I groaned. That's my friend Susan.She's been my friend since kindergarten,and as you 
can see she does not like to be late. I walked up to the shelf to put the book away.Then,I walked to
 Susan.
"Come on we are late."
"But-"
"No buts"
We walked to the classroom.It turns out we were not late (like always). Well , after a few minutes class started. I didn't feel good. I felt itchy. I raised my hand. "Can I go to the bathroom?" I said.
The teacher nodded.I walked to the bathroom and looked at the mirror. I had blue dots all over my body.No wonder it was itching. It was like blue chickenpox. I have read every book in the library. Well almost all the books. There was one dusty book that I couldn't read because the "late monitor" said we were late.But I do know that if you itch yourself when you have chickenpox you will get a permanent scar.I couldn't help It ,so I just scratched. "Ow!" I looked at the mirror. I just found a scar my hand.

I closed my eyes and started thinking of a bonfire with its crackling blue flames produced by the oxygen molecules that comes in contact with nitrogen and carbon dioxide. Slowly this would shift the hottest blue flames into slightly milder orange flames graduated from red.  I gathered the tingling feeling of molecules inside my hand and pushed it outwards.

When I opened my eyes, I saw the surprised faces of Christopher and Luke. The room that used to be never ending turned into a medium twenty metered square room with white walls and floors. Their faces looked like their jaws would drop to the floor and they kept on staring at me for a few minutes. Maybe this was the result of the unlimited MP that I got from God? Even though I never actually saw the flame, maybe the result of the flame destroyed the never-ending room. 

To break the awkward silence, I asked, "So how many points did we end up getting?"

Christopher quickly regained his composure and replied, "10 000 points."
-------------------------------------------------------

After that big event, nothing eventful happened afterwards for the remaining subjects. In the end, Luke and I got 20 000 points. Sigh. It looks like we still have a long way to go. 

When we got back to our medieval like room, we saw a tablet on the floor. I grabbed the tablet and looked at the screen, which displayed: Would you like to upgrade your room?

I pressed 'yes' almost immediately as the screen changed soon afterwards. There was quite a few options in the upgrades. It first asked if we would want to move to the upper floors, or if we wanted to stay in the basement. It cost 15 000 points to move to the second floor, where we would get a decent bathroom that resembled mine from my previous world. After I pressed 'yes', the tablet starting shining and on top of the tablet was a room key that wasn't previously there. 

I grabbed all my stuff (which was only my school bag and uniforms) and made Luke carry his own and went to the second floor using the modern looking stairs dragging Luke along the way.

I used the room key to get inside to see a ten metered square room that was absolutely empty and a bathroom that was shown in the tablet. 

I forgot about the bedding and only thought about the room! At this rate, it wasn't that much better than the basement except for the modern bathroom. I glanced at Luke for help and passed him the tablet to make the decision of what we should do for the remaining points. 

Sitting beside Luke while putting our stuff on the wooden floor, Luke went over all the options of how we could use the 5000 points. It cost 10 000 points to buy one bed with the framing, pillows, blanket with a mattress that was the standard size for one person. However, it cost only 4950 points to buy the mattress (with the mattress cover included) of a king sized bed.  So we ended up buying the mattress, so that we didn't have to sleep on the floor. Sigh. 

The room was absolutely empty except for the mattress that suddenly appeared in the middle of the room after the tablet started shining again. I swore to myself that I would study harder to get a decent bed and apologized to Luke within my heart that I wasn't as capable as him. Sigh. 

Fortunately, this empty room had two closets, but it was also absolutely empty. I pick up the stuff I had on floor and placed them inside the closet. I started to get ready to take a bath, but I realized the only clothes I had was my uniforms. Sigh. We still had 50 points left, so I ended up using 25 points to buy one cheap piece of underwear and pyjamas and gave the rest of the points to Luke. It seemed like Luke decided to buy the same things and we ended up using all the 20 000 points in one day.

There was one week until our next examination so that the school can see how well we've adapted after a week. Until then, we would have to survive on these bare conditions. This was the first time, I was thankful for exams! 

At least I got to sleep in for tomorrow because it was the weekend starting from tomorrow like my previous life. After taking a blissful shower, I flopped onto the bed and fell asleep. 

Well at least that was the situation that I was planning to do, but I couldn't sleep. I was too anxious about getting enough points that I caught Luke after his shower and dragged him into the library study room. After making Luke sit down with passing his backpack in front of the table, I went out of the room to pull out some books from the dimensional library based on the content on the exams that we had today and went back inside the study room to slam a huge pile of books on the table. Eventually, the pile of books resembled Luke's height. Fortunately, Luke looked way to tired to ask where I got these books from and just grabbed a book to start reading.

I soon chose a book from the pile while sitting down and took a sheet of paper and a pencil out of my backpack. The study room fell into a silent atmosphere for the next twelve hours, until I fell asleep while reading and the world around me faded into black.

I was captured and put onto a stake to be lit on fire as part of the ongoing witch hunt conducted throughout the land. I had to do something. But, this life really sucked. 

This all started when I was accidentally killed by God. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to kill you. It was just that I was overworked lately by my superior and I just wanted some time to relax and vent my stress out," he confessed.

"So, while I was snacking, I accidently dropped one potato chip into the human realm where the child tripped over the potato chip onto a den of steep stairs." God guilty admitted.

So I reincarnated into the most adorable girl with the largest orange-speckled eyes that contrasted her pale white skin void of any imperfections.

'How could someone look this pretty?' I thought as I admired my new appearance.

I was nowhere close to this pretty in my previous life. Did God put me into this new vessel as an apology?

But some things were too good to be true.
***
"We can do this the nice way or the hard way," My fiancé’s brother started off.
"The nice way is where you willingly come with us back to the first district and the hard way is where we forcibly take you back, which would be hard for all of us," Lucius gave me a warning.
Why was my life so depressing? He practically meant I didn’t have a choice! 
***
Few months later, I was at a party that I planned to escape from my fiancé’s family.
"I still get to continue with my naps on the weekends?" I tried to confirm with them.
No one answered as I almost cried from giving up my rare nap times from the mess I got involved with. This life was too bothersome!

After telling Evangeline that he was fine, Jam cleaned his cultivation area, and headed to his bathroom. After the ordeal he went through to complete his Bone Realm body, Jam was dying to relax.

On his way to the bathroom, Jam noticed that Evangeline had started moving around. He didn't know what she was up to, but his fatigue made him unable to care about her problems for the moment.

Jam made it to his bathroom and filled his bathtub full of hot water. The house that the academy gave to Jam had an over-the-top bathroom. Not only was the bathroom the size of any other room in the house — excluding the cultivation chamber upstairs — Jam's bathroom had its own separate showering area from the bathtub; it wouldn't be a problem for several people to use the bathroom at the same time.

After learning to clean himself with energy, Jam stopped regularly taking showers. But when he did take a shower to relax, he wouldn't usually use the bath. The fatigue this time was truely top tier, seeing as how Jam felt the need to take a bath.

As the warm bath was being prepared, Jam slowly took his time showering. Jam was very meticulous with his time in the shower, as this was a luxury he didn't enjoy often. But more importantly, after his breakthrough to the Bone Realm Jam had a ton of damaged skin hanging all over his body.

Jam would make sure all this old and broken skin fell of his body before he entered the bathtub. He used a sponge to clear anything he didn't want on his body. This included both the old ragged pieces of skin, as well as the impurities that he had expelled while cultivating.
 
Jam had reached peak-insanity, when he decided to take the 20 Bone Spurring Pills for each cycle of energy. Sure, that allowed him to quickly complete his Bone Realm body, but it also made him bleed the impurities out of his body. This mixture of blood and cultivation impurities was nasty to say the least. Even if Jam used his energy to dispel the stick mixture from his body, he would find it troublesome. Moreover, that god-awful smell would still linger; he needed this bath and shower combo.

Jam made sure that his body was brand-spanking new, before entering the bath. He wouldn't be able to relax in the bathtub, if there were impurities floating around in his relaxation vessel.

Jam stepped into the bathtub, and managed to relax for a total of three seconds before he heard his bathroom door, open. Jam was greeted by the sight of a VERY exposed Evangeline, only covered by a towel. At first, Jam thought he was still hallucinating, but after scanning Evangeline with his Detecting Form, he realized this was really happening.

"Why?" This was the only word Jam could utter. He couldn't think of any possible reason for why Evangeline would have wanted to enter the bath at this point in time.

"Huh?" Evangeline was surprised at Jam's lack of reaction. She came with the expectation of seeing Jam's face turn red, and kept imagining Jam's flustered behavior in this situation. Too bad Jam was still not interested in the opposite sex.

"Why did you come in now?" Jam clarified his previous sentence.

"To… to comfort my worn out husband. Yeah, that's why I'm here... Why? Would you prefer that I leave?" Evangeline bullshitted her way through her response, and turn back the tides on Jam.

"Nah I don't really care. It's just that your behavior always seems to amaze me. You constantly act in ways contrary to what the books I've read say."

Evangeline didn't understand what Jam meant when he talked about the books he had read, but she blushed at Jam's shameless admission to not minding her presence in the bath with him; at least that was what her mind interpreted.

Evangeline was a true champion of the heart, as she straight up dipped herself into the bath, with Jam still in it. Just to see what expression Jam would make as she raised the stakes. She had been waiting for over a week to prank Jam, and by god, she would get her desired result today!

Jam disappointed her, as he looked like this situation was just another arbitrary moment in his life. Instead the person who ended up with a red face and showed flustered expressions was none other than Evangeline. Because, as she entered the bath and looked at Jam, she saw that he wasn't covered by a towel like herself.

Moreover, Jam seemed to care even less about being exposed in front of her, than when he saw her enter the room. Jam's apparent voyeurism told Evangeline that Jam was a tough nut to crack, and that to get the reactions she wanted from him would require the use of extreme measures.

Evangeline's pride became her downfall today, as in her attempt to embarrass Jam, she discarded her towel, bringing about an equilibrium of nudity to the room. This action certainly got a reaction out of Jam. However, instead of embarrassment, a look of confusion spawned on Jam's face.

The books he had read on social affairs made him certain that the chances, of Evangeline revealing herself in such a manner, happening were impossibly low. It wasn't even an option Jam had considered for this situation.

However, Evangeline was a girl and Jam had yet to see a living example of their "partless" crotches. She seemed to not care about the awkwardness of nudity between the two genders, so Jam wouldn't let this chance go to waste. Jam started speaking.

"Hey, I was wondering… could you stand up for a second." These words might have been acceptable in other situation, but they were directed by a boy to a girl, who was naked in his bath; it wasn't appropriate for these circumstances, to say the least.

'Oh, shit. I've seriously fucked up this time around. He's my future husband so I don't mind letting him see me naked, but if he tries something funny...' Evangeline thought to herself. She didn't think of what would happen if Jam "tried anything funny," but the result wouldn't be pretty...

Evangeline took a deep breath, gave Jam a glare full of complex emotions, and stood up, revealing herself in the totality of her perfection. 

It should be noted that Evangeline had been seriously cultivating her body, and had even reached the beginning phases of the Bone Realm. Each time a person made a breakthrough to the next Stage or Realm in body refinement, their body would become closer to that of the ideal body. This in turn made Jam look like a devilishly handsome eighteen-year-old, and Evangeline looked like an eighteen-year-old world class beauty. 

Honestly, the scene of both of them in the bathroom, looked less like a bunch of derpy ten-year-olds playing around in the bath, and more like a mature couple acting out some sort of soft foreplay.

As Jam looked at the the now exposed Evangeline, he couldn't help but mutter under his breath "It really is true… they really do have partless crotches..."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Evangeline had heard Jam's mutterings as clear as day.

"I read a book on anatomy, but up until this very moment, I've never managed to see a real woman's crotch. I had always been skeptical about the rumors, but they were really true! Men and women have different crotches!"

The ridiculousness of Jam's explanation diffused how tense the mood was, and Evangeline felt atmosphere lighten up. So, she sat back down, and the two enjoyed their bath for a while. Evangeline, while wanting to trust Jam, still couldn't help but be on guard against him during their bath. Jam on the other hand, closed his eyes and fully enjoyed his bath for the span of its duration.

When Jam felt relaxed enough, he got out of the bath, dispelled any lingering drops of water still stuck to his skin with his energy, and put on his uniform. Whenever Jam was out of combat he would walk around in his bare uniform.

Evangeline was still pulling herself back together after that experience she shared with Jam in the bathroom, but soon followed after Jam's steps in re-clothing herself. 

The two Dao Companions were trying their best to understand the others intentions. Jam acted completely different that what was expected of a boy his age, and the same could be said for Evangeline.

...

After this desperately needed break, Jam returned to his cultivation room and resumed his energy cultivation. Now that Jam had completed his body cultivation for the Spirit Realm, he could focus more time on his other core skills and energy cultivation.

Jam and the other core disciples, had about a weeks worth of time to prepare for the trip to the Titanic Beast Mountain Range. During this time, apart from improving his relationship with Evangeline, Jam managed to reach the peak of the Soul Condensing Stage, as well as master all the core skills available to him from the Thunderfire Cataclysm.

After Jam's willpower had been strengthened through his experience with the Bone Realm of body cultivation, Jam's souls grew to be several times more resistant. Therefore, allowing him to feed his soul larger amounts of energy at a faster rate. This resulted in him being at the peak of the Soul Condensing Stage by the end of the week. Jam's soul was now the same size as his body.

Right before the core disciples would meet in the classroom to leave with Cecily to the Titanic Beast Mountain Range, Jam also collected the techniques he was promised for being in the champion squad of the hunting competition. 

Tzatziki recommended that Jam should take a Demonic technique for the Saint Realm technique, and a Yang technique for the Sage Realm technique. Jam could understand why a demonic technique was picked. Jam had his True Demon Form, but it had no skills aside from the transformation. But, the Yang technique? Why on earth would Jam need a Yang technique, after all the Daos he was currently studying?

Jam tried to ask Tzatziki, why he could possibly need a Yang technique. But all he did was giggle non-stop and put on a peculiar face — ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). In the end Tzatziki finally put together a complete sentence through his laughing "Your going to need it in the future. TRUST ME."

Follow the adventures of a boy named Jam on his journey to gain a purpose. Thrust onto the world of cultivation because of the silly encouragement of his foster grandmother and his ridiculously one-track-minded self, Jam's adventure is bound to be full of action, comedy, and self discovery. Hopefully, his stupidity will be cured before it affects his life too badly.

-----

Here's my cringy first attempt at a hook, so let me be more straightforward with what this will turn out to be~

A "dense" MC in all the wrong ways, who's OPness brings Xianxia protagonists to shame.

Some wacky situations that exploit the density and idiocy of the MC, which will inevitably shape his future self.

A band of overpowered companions that follow Jam in his journey to find purpose, with only a single love interest (for now, and probably forever~)

-----

[Current] Schedule: Hiatus...

[Relationship] Goals (End the week's rating with):

100 Power Stones = Extra chapter (Week of January 7, 14)

150 Power Stones = Extra chapter (Week of January 21)

The automatic robots did the heavy lifting, carrying and setting materials at appropriate places and then human use tools to connect them. The day started with the automatic robots placing the appropriate steel poles onto the correct place for the workers to mend the poles into place. This cycle repeats for most of the day.
Prince Hue Chi had been working remotely for the last several days at the cruise ship. He got a lot of works done for not having to travel back and forth between the Royal Palace and Aires Royal Corporate Square. Long Kue had been busy preparing and coordinating the next business travel trip for the Royal Prince.
Hue Chi had sent Dao Txu to go on a few days errand run to meet up with another shadow guard currently away for a mission. Therefore, Dao Txu was not around to bother anyone while PengXu stayed behind to guard the Prince as usual.
The foundation frame will take about one week to finish, and that will be right before when Prince Hue Chi will leave for his trip.
Yu Sha has been avoiding night strolls to avoid meeting Hue Chi. She usually spent her time idling on her balcony if she could not sleep. The cycle repeats itself and before long, a week has gone by.
One morning, Prince Hue Chi asked Long Kue to email Jake and Su Na that he would go out to inspect the site on behalf of Ether the next day. He wanted to give them the one day notice to give everyone time to prepare themselves.
Later that afternoon, Dao Txu came back from his few days errand run for his Lord. When he arrived back at the cruise, he brought a bag full of books, looking merrily as ever after. The first thing he did was went to the Prince's suite. When he noticed that everyone was busy doing their own thing, with the Prince in his office, Long Kue sitting on the dining table working on his laptop, while Butler Zeu ironing the Prince's clothes. Dao Txu walked right over to the living room and sat the bag by the big comfy couch before sitting down.
Dao Txu then casually took out a book titled, "Dating 101 For Men" and pretended to read the book. After ten minutes, he set the book down on the small table on top of a couple of magazines, grabbed another book and headed for the balcony. He found himself a chair next to the table and started reading the book called, "Dos and Don'ts Guide to Romance."
About five minutes into the book, Dao Txu casually left the book on the balcony table, walked back inside by the couch, and grabbed another book. Once he had the book in his hand, he casually walked to the kitchen, opened the fridge, and took out some leftover food. He heated the leftover food and went to sit on the dining table to eat while reading the book, "How To Impress Your Woman." After ten minutes, he casually left the book on the dining table.
Long Kue glanced at Dao Txu, 'this guy here does not read and why is he reading today?' When he looked at the book title, he knew that this guy was up to no good again. How in the world does he have time and energy to come up with such things?
Dao Txu's next target was the office and bedroom, but that would be too obvious so he opted for the bathroom. He went back to the couch and grabbed another book from the bag before heading to the bathroom. Dao Txu went to sit on the toilet flipping a couple of page of the book titled, "How To Attract Women." After five minutes, he flushed the toilet and left the magazine on a towel shelf before walking out.
His lord sometimes sits on the dining table in the kitchen and or balcony while reading the news and sipping coffee every morning. The chance of his lord seeing the book on the dining table and balcony is higher than the living room or bathroom. But as long as he could pique his lord's interest into just glancing any of the books longer than two seconds, he would've won the battle already.
After hanging up the ironed clothes, Butler Zeu went to restock the towels in the bathroom and noticed the book title. He automatically knew what Dao Txu was up to. Since he felt the same way as Dao Txu, he allowed Dao Txu to litter the place with dating books. Hopefully, his prince would pick up some dating tactics.
Butler Zeu walked over to the prince and convinced him to have his meal out on the deck as it was not good to stay coop up in the suite day after day to which the Prince agreed. Butler Zeu then happily called the kitchen staff to coordinate dinner for the young men to eat dinner out on the deck.
The day ended and the construction crew wrapped up their work. Yu Sha and Su Na had reduced their working hours. Everyone usually went back to their rooms, showers and changed before coming out to have dinner. Sometimes, not everyone eat their dinner out in the deck but most people go out to the deck since the kitchen there always had ready to eat food around breakfast, lunch and dinner time.
PengXu surveyed the surrounding and there seemed to be no suspicious activities. If there was no suspicious activity or person, he can openly join the group for dinner up on the deck. Prince Hue Chi and his confidants made their way to the deck. When they arrived on the third floor of the deck, the server had just finished setting their foods on the table.
Everyone found a spot to sit on the table on the third floor. It usually was rare for them to dine on the same table together at the same time with their big Boss, the Prince. Dao Txu looked forward to this dinner the most, as he knew the daily routine of the construction crew. Most of the time, everyone came out to eat on the deck for its convenience.


Genre: Modern Fantasy Romance, Super Natural, Multiple Lives, Action, Comedy, Mystery

Yu Sha was born prematurely and her heart wasn’t fully closed. The first several years of her life, were often spent in the hospital undergoing procedures. But she did not let her condition defined who she is. She worked hard and excelled in sports and PE class. 

Su Na’s mother had gone through a traumatic experience which caused her to be frequently hospitalized. As long as she could remember, she never had a father. It wasn’t until later she learned the ugly truth and make it her life long mission to build her own empire in order to crush the person who made her mother suffered. 

The hospital was where they met and became good friends. They attended the same classes and schools. Upon graduating early, they embarked on a journey to stardom to build Su Na’s empire. 


Hue Chi, Prince of Aires, had everything anyone could dream of but carried an illness to himself. The woman that haunted him in his sleep, who was she? How was she able to control his emotions, waking him up in the middle of the night, sometimes, in terror, in pain, and sometimes in happiness? The emotions she elicits locked his heart cold, unable to like any other woman, thus distancing himself from others. People are scared to approach him due to the distant and icy auras around him. 

Just as the universe planned it, Yu Sha and Su Na won their bid on a project in Aires, which will require them to live in Aires for at least half a year. As Prince of an entire continent, he felt unsettled of two young female prodigies. Do they come with hidden motives? Not sure if they have anything to do with the secret organization he has been after, he ordered them to fly into Aires for a meet and greet with the investors and other companies involved in the project. 

Unforeseen in his calculation, his eyes drifted towards her anytime she was nearby. He reasoned with himself that he just wanted to make sure of her status and purpose, but somewhere in his heart, he couldn’t gravitate away. The way she talked, her behaviors, her voice, and demeanor elicited the same emotions of the woman that haunted him in his dreams. 

Some may think destiny is cruel and some may think that destiny is kind for playing with people’s heart, as it seemed the world was not small enough to allow them to be lovers, but not wide enough so their path will never cross.

With a wave of tremble, the Wuling Hong Guang drove up to the sidewalk and stopped in front of the pet shop.
The door opened and Zhang Zian got off the car.　　
The chic ladies glanced at him while they passed by, then covered their noses in disgust and kept a distance from his car.　　
Despite the fact that he didn't specialize in the seafood business, he drove to the beach each day, and often took rare marine creatures, such as fish, shrimp, and crabs, back. He could not wash the containers in the car everyday, so after some time, the car inevitably smelled like fish.　　
Wang Qian and Li Kun greeted him, and carried the new marine creatures into the aquarium. They sorted them and put them into different quarantine tanks so that they could adapt to the new environment.　　
Zhang Zian walked into the shop. The cleaning job was almost done, so he didn't have much to do. He took the underwater loudspeaker battery upstairs to charge.　　
He met Old Time Tea on the stairs. He hinted Old Time Tea and asked gently, "How is it?"　　
Old Time Tea smiled gently. "Everything is under your expectations."　　
The man and the cat looked at each other and smiled.　　
"Quack! What are you talking about in secret? What are you hiding from me?" Richard had sharply sensed the unusual atmosphere while it flew by. 　　
"Right. We are discussing you behind your back––specifically plucking your feather and making you into a stew," Zhang Zian threatened. "After you become stew, the world will be quiet."　　
"Quack! My meat is old and dry––it wouldn't taste good in a stew. I suggest you pick another bird!" Richard flew away quickly.　　
Old Time Tea walked downstairs slowly for the television, while Zhang Zian headed upstairs to wash his hands. They carried a fishy smell after they were soaked in the sea. He could still feel some fine, sea salt granules after his hands were dry. 　　
As soon as he entered the bathroom, he saw Sihwa hide something in a hurry.　　
He pretended not to see it. After turning on the tap, he asked, "Why aren't you broadcasting today?"　　
Sihwa was angry and humiliated after hearing his question. "Today… I'm not in the mood today! I don't want to broadcast!"　　
"Okay. It's nice to take a day off sometimes." Zhang Zian wiped his hands, then left the bathroom.　　
"Wait a moment!" Sihwa shouted behind him.　　
"What is it?" Zhang Zian stopped.　　
"Emm… This… Emm… That…" she stuttered. Her pale face turned red because she needed his help. After stammering for a long time, she took out a book from under a towel. "I can't read. What can I do?" she asked, troubled. "I know a few Korean words, but not any Chinese words…"　　
She could play with the phone, as the phone functions were simple––as long as she remembered the icons. She could make guesses on others, or ask Zhang Zian if it was too hard to guess. However, reading a book full of Chinese characters was mission impossible to her.　　
In fact, she had learned a few Chinese words since she had arrived in China. But she had learned them mechanically; she didn't have any formal, systemic teaching.
"You must be laughing at me, aren't you? You absolutely are!" She pointed at his face in fury before Zhang Zian had even said anything. She was almost embarrassed to tears.
"I'm not laughing at you. It's normal to be illiterate. Nobody is born literate." Zhang Zian shrugged. "Otherwise, they'd be a freak."　　
After hearing his words, Sihwa's mood calmed down a little.　　
"Well… Is there anything you can do to make me literate?" she asked, lowering her head.　　
"Yes. Lend me your phone for a moment." Zhang Zian took her phone and downloaded a few early childhood education apps from the app store. They were all basic-level, but entertaining word learning apps nonetheless; he started with Pinyin, which had real people's voices. The apps were already quite developed, and the functions were complete.　　
He compared a few quickly, then left the most user-friendly one and deleted the rest.　
"Here you are. Follow this. You'll learn them soon." He gave the phone back to her.　　
"Wow! So childish!" She complained as soon as she saw the interface for young kids. "Are there any long-legged Oppas or big-boobed girls teaching the lessons?"　　
"Save it. I'd love to learn if these teachings existed!" Zhang Zian took up her book and flipped through it. The book from Old Time Tea was not suitable.　　
He returned the book to Pi, then found a few fairy tale books with pictures from his childhood book collection. Each character was marked with a Pinyin illustration.　　
"After you learn Pinyin, you can read these books. Just learn the words while reading the stories." He piled the books on the bathroom closet. "Oh, right––books are not waterproof. Dry your hands before you read them. These are books from my childhood. Most of them can't even be found these days."　　
"Books from your childhood?" Sihwa seemed skeptical. "Could there be… Any dirty content in them?"　　
"These are all fairy tales, okay?" Zhang Zian said with frustration. "What kind of person do you think I am? These are the books I read at the age of five or six. What kind of dirty content can there be?"　　
"Fairy tale books? I'm not interested… too childish." She shook her hands. "Let's get something dirty!"　　
Did this fish get contaminated by that bird? What was in her head all day?　　
"You are wrong. In fact, fairy tales are not necessarily childish," Zhang Zian said. "Even adults could interpret content differently sometimes."　　
"What do you mean? I don't understand." Sihwa grew slightly interested.　　
Zhang Zian thought about it, then made an example she could understand. "In fairy tales, you often read stories of Cinderella meeting the prince…"　　
"I know this! It happens a lot in Korean dramas, too!" Sihwa suddenly turned excited, as if she finally found someone with the same interests as her.　　
"Yes, right. That's why people often call Korean dramas 'fairy tales for adults.'" Zhang Zian suddenly changed his tone. "But have you ever given thought to the fact that, in the end of fairy tales and Korean dramas, the story stops where Cinderella marries the prince?"　　
She nodded in agreement.　　
"What about the story after?" Zhang Zian continued to ask.　　
"What story after? It's over!" She didn't understand.　　
"I mean, two people from completely different worlds… Are they really happy after marriage? The prince and Cinderella had completely different educations, family backgrounds, and growing experiences. After marrying the prince, Cinderella must have faced a truckload of royal relatives. Did they really respect and accept her? Did love really defeat all the challenges? Even if it did for a while, what happens after the passion dies out?"　　
Zhang Zian's series of questions made Sihwa astonished.　　
"The boring, everyday life of the world after marriage is never mentioned in fairy tales, nor in Korean dramas. They always end with the line that Cinderella and the prince lived happily ever after. Although they didn't mention this, you can try to imagine, then tell your audience about your thoughts in the live broadcast. Isn't this great?"　　
Sihwa was drawn in gradually. In the past, she had never used her brain to watch dramas. She either laughed or cried as the story went along. She had never thought about the questions Zhang Zian had brought up.　　
"Would the audience like to hear this?" she asked.　　
"Of course," Zhang Zian said in certainty. "You can also try to make up sequels to fairy tales and tell everyone. You have such lovely voice. I'm sure people will like it."　　
"Really? I have lovely voice?" Her confidence was already shaken from one blow after another. She was no longer as arrogant as before. 　　
"It's absolutely lovely. I'm not joking. If you don't believe me, ask the other elfins," he said, suddenly feeling that his words might have been too mean in the past. 　　
"Oh… okay. But don't lie to me…" she mumbled gently as she picked up the fairy tale books.　　
"What are these?" She browsed through the covers one by one.　　
"They are all classic fairy tales written by great writers all over the world, such as fairy tales by the Brothers Grimm, fairy tales by Hans Christian Andersen, Aesop's Fables, One Thousand and One Nights, Zhang Yuanjie's Fairy Tale Collection, etc. They'll last quite a while," Zhang Zian said, introducing them one by one.　　
"Oh." Her eyes glided through the colorful and entertaining covers. She saw a prince with a sword on a white horse, a grey wolf wearing a pajama hat, a little girl with a match stick in a snowy night, a tin man with big belly, a little duckling staring at the sky, a fox with a broken tail, an ugly toad, a mouse driving a tank… She also saw a little mermaid sitting on a rock, overlooking the sea. 　　
For some reason, the figure seemed so lonely.　　
Under an unrecognizable impulse, she opened up one of the books, even though she didn't know a single character in it.　　
"I can't read it…" she said in disappointment.　　
"It's fine. You'll understand it once you learn the characters." Zhang Zian encouraged her. "Be patient! These fairy tales may seem childish, but in fact, you can find non-childish stuff in it. As long as you read them with your whole heart, you'll surely discover something different… Then, you can share your thoughts boldly with your broadcast audience."　　
"Okay. Let me try." Sihwa looked at the fairy tale covers again. She was more eager to learn now than ever before.　　
She wanted to be able to read the fairy tales. She wanted to do what Zhang Zian described––to write sequels for the finished fairy tales. She was the only one who could do it, and who was qualified to do it.　　
She picked up her phone and entered the child education app, imitating the mouth and sound movements against the image on the screen.　　
"A… A… Bo… Bo… Ci… Ci… De… De…" she read off while peeping at Zhang Zian's facial expressions; she wanted to confirm that he was not laughing at her. She then continued reading boldly.　　
"It's fine. You can read loudly. Raise your head and straighten your back. Read every word boldly," Zhang Zian encouraged her.　　
"A… A… Bo… Bo… Ci… Ci… De… De…" she read even louder, like a baby learning to talk.　　


1. Download a suspicious game
2. Catch a few magical pets as partners
3. Go through interesting daily routines and lead the pet shop to a whole new level

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