The Immortal (twilight fanfiction)

LV 10

SpeedyG

This story is awesome, is original and plot makes sense, right amount of time skip w/o leaving unexplained gaps. It keeps you engaged in every chapter...

LV 14

war777

really excited to read more! one of the few twilight fanfic's that adds to the wold.

LV 13

Apollocus

It's quite good even I like the set up at the start and he seems pretty realistic as a person. I saw some people saying that oh he has no ambition and why did he learn to fight only after fighting a vampire. Well it's plain and simple, he can't die and it isn't even the start of the original twilight series we are still in old times and right now he is just enjoying life and what is currently happening is just the set up. Now for the fighting, that was the first vampire he fought and everything before that he could just one shot since he can't die. Like you can't tell you need something until you experience failure that shows what needs to be improved and how you can improve your weaknesses. All in all very good and I want more chapters.

LV 4

mow

Not for me, the MC lacks ambition its just boring, dude spent over a thousand years doing nothing but living in tribes and did not even bother to learn any combat arts until after his first vampire fight. I honestly see no point in putting him this far before canon cuz he's doing nothing with his thousand years beside learning combat arts now and going around healing humans. If someone is this far back I expected some form of legacy being created like a Kingdom or a very strong Clan of descendants but nah its just yapping until canon finally arrives.

LV 4

TinyBookDragon

The author isn't lying when they say 'average writing'. The grammar is fine but expect inconsistencies and an incompetent and dumb MC. He hides from a vampire, a vampire that should be able to hear his heartbeat and smell him. After being alive for over a thousand years he states that he still doesn't know how to fight and only decides to learn after fighting and killing a vampire. He learns how to use weapons even though the only thing that can hurt a vampire is another vampire. So many other things but you get the point.

LV 14

Beans_on_a_tree

What can I say? 😘 ----------------------

LV 13

Raventan

live more than 1000+ year but master of none even trash these day better than this if they have that much time you try to write this you should make it better mc if this keep going to the way of modern time MC can only be beggar or homeless with this MC kind of mindset he will achieve nothing

LV 2

Otaku_Brasileiro

I really liked this fanfic but it takes a long time to update, I highly recommend this fanfic. Could update faster since this fanfic has a future

LV 1

funny_lol

I thought he would try to become stronger, but no, he does not train, does not test his body for strength at all, it is not clear why?! I thought he wouldn 't shoot everywhere , but would open his intelligence to know about everything, he has money but he doesn 't actually use it. Does it make sense to have a lot of money and guard it? Couldn't he have trained vampire hunters? He couldn't use money to change the Bible about himself?! it seems like a normal plot , but a lot of things are missing from where did the vampires come from ? Are there any magicians? Where are the werewolves? Vampires would hardly have appeared without magic! In short, does the author want to make hidden enemies for our gg? but where does he have enemies , what nonsense did the author come up with ? how much do I know at dusk vampires seem to take strength from blood so that it's nonsense that vampires burn from his blood))

LV 10

theanimemail

So, this story has quite a few issues: comma usage is minimal, which leads the writing to feel quite stilted (note: a common issue for novels on here); characters' appearances and clothing aren't described, which was really prevalent to me since I've never really watched the show or read the books (note 2: this is one of the biggest issues so far); the world and the MC surroundings are only given barebones descriptions, which makes most of the scenes pretty bland to read about, most aspects of the MC's journey are skimmed, which, while making for good pacing, makes his thousands of years of life seem kinda inconsequential and impactful to his base personality and thought processes (Note 3: I'd have liked the author to go into more depth when it comes to some of the stuff the MC has seen over the years; I want to know what large settlements in China looked like and the peoples culture from the MC's perspective, what the top of mount Everest looked like). So, in summary, while I'd only tentatively recommend this book, I really hope to see the author steadily improve his writing skills as this fiction continues. P.S., please use the Grammarly + Quilbot method I mentioned in the comments.

LV 4

Child_of_Azathoth

well, never thought I'd find myself reading and enjoying twilight fanfiction... but here we are.

LV 4

behind_your_sister

BEST TWILIGHT FANFIC .............................................(I WANT SOME TWILIGHT FANFIC RECOMMENDATIONS)........................................

LV 4

Humbuub

4-5-3-2-5. The earlier chapters have some redundant paragraphs, it did get better. I enjoy the pacing so far, kinda reminds me of that Eternals fanfic. The MC is a bit bland, the emotional dampeners ruin any chance of character development. The updates are inconsistent and on the slow side.

LV 13

Storm20074

Love the story so far. I have seen Twilight but not enough to know the story. Even then though it is quite easy to follow and still enjoyable.

LV 4

IzzyApproved

well written,hope the update is consistent

LV 1

MarkJr

The story is super great! Its just, The MC described and the coverart MC differs. I mean, The MC inside is tall, masculine, chad like handsome, the coverart looks dwork still a 4.8 stars

LV 14

Mike_Davis

Refreshing fun, read. Very well written. Definitely recommend reading.

LV 14

deadimp

great story so far cant wait for more chapters. the story is great, and the background makes it more enjoyable, and i like that it is not rushed to get to the main story. i like how he is unique, not a wearwolf or vampire

LV 3

Novel_Lover_2360

One of the best... No, the best twilight fanfic so far, keep the good work man 👍.................... Oh and please no rosalie or alice or any vampire uf you can just a shapeshifter will be a good choice