Desainer kepala SI Corporation yang terkenal, Xiao Yu, masih muda, menjanjikan, dan penuh dengan bakat. Tetapi siapa yang mengira bahwa surga akan cemburu dengan kejeniusan kepahlawanan ini ?! Setelah bangun dari kecelakaan mobil, dia tiba-tiba terlahir kembali sebagai hamster!

An unlikely team, Snake and Hamster, put their heads together to escape the pet store on the only day of the year there is no staff; Christmas.

A one-shot for a writing prompt - target length 1k words.

Su Min a young teenager died early in his last life but was shockingly reborn in another world. Terra a world of beastmen! While there are many beastkin imagine his disappointment when he learns that his species, the hamster species are the weakest race in the world! They even forgot how to transform after the war of Doom! In this world where the weak rule they only survived due to a stroke of luck!

After some shock Su Min gathered his courage.
Big Brother Ben decided to educate his strange little brother who was 4 months younger than him.

“ What are you saying?Laozi will not die in three years! F* that! Do you know how difficult it is to have a healthy body !”

Su Min saved all the pups from danger and helped them survive winter and the dry months.

The hamsters gathered to laugh at the strange young hamster who always had weird ideas.
“ Laugh. Laugh at you want now ! One day you will bow and call Laozi King!”
 Su Min taught them to fight ,cultivate and transform into beastmen form. He awakened hidden blood lines and powers.

The beastmen mocked him in the arena and he half- squeaked , half- roared.

“ SO WHAT IF LAOZI IS A HAMSTER! DON’T YOU BELIEVE THIS HAMSTER WILL BITE YOU TO DEATH!”

In the end there’s just one thing to say- dynamite comes in small packages.

Su Min slowly but surely became a winner in life becoming a great and powerful king who controlled life and death in his hands. He began to build a utopia and set off to find a beautiful hamster wife.

Umm... No? He brought back a powerful and domineering male tiger who spoilt and petted him the whole day!

Su Min and Husband:I love you so Much that I would kill for you and die for you! 

☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

Hamsters:(´⊙ω⊙`)

“Kings stop feeding us dog food! Enough is enough!”

Other tigers:(¬_¬)

Zhang Yun is a gaming hamster. For a special mission in the Lost Kingdom, he has been a hamster for ten years. To his surprise one day, the game suddenly announces that the server will be permanently going offline just as he's about to complete the mission…

However, at the moment the game goes permanently offline, he actually brings the game system to an alternate world. He also brings along everything in his inventory, including his hundred million summoning scrolls.

Uh?

For a ten-year hamster to become rich overnight, what worries does he have at conquering the alternate world?

Ah, I'm sorry. You're mistaken. I don't want to fight. I just want to be a silent hamster…

Zhang Yun has a habit of hoarding stuff in games. For the sake of a special quest in the game 'Lost Kingdom', he's been hoarding all kinds of items for ten years straight. Just as he's on the verge of completing that quest, suddenly there comes an announcement that the server will be taken offline.
And then, at the moment of shutdown, he's transported into the game world, along with everything in his inventory... including one hundred million summoning scrolls.
Huh?
Ten years hoarding all this loot... every challenge rendered moot?
Ah, but please, don't get the wrong idea. I'm not looking for any trouble--just a quiet little hoarder, nothing more...

In the world of Beast people, there is one rule that needs to be abode by all-- that hierarchy must be preceded. It is a place where strongest predators prey and immortals rule over others, it is only to ensure the balance in the cycle of life.

For Chii, coming from a hamster litter; it isn't an easy life.


Dragon!mainlead, hamster!maincharacter

"Master, mayroon kang manloko, mayroon kang manloko! Mahirap para sa karaniwang mga halamang panggamot na mag-alaga ng isang hamster na naghahanap ng ginto, ngunit mayroon kang mga espirituwal na halamang gamot! Kung hayaan mong gamitin ang mga espirituwal na halamang gamot bilang pagkain, mabilis itong lalago!" 


Sa kontinente na ito, ang ordinaryong, mas bata na henerasyon ng mga maharlika ay gagawa ng isa o dalawang mga espiritung hayop upang maging kanilang mga kasama! Noong nakaraan, hindi ito si Yun Luofeng ay walang ganoong uri ng paniwala, ngunit dahil hindi siya nagtataglay ng isang smidgen ng kapangyarihan, kahit na ang ibang tao mula sa Pamilya ng Yun ay nagpakalma ng hayop na espiritu para sa kanya, sa kalaunan ay magiging isang araw kapag ang espiritung hayop na iyon ay ipagkanulo siya! Ang hamster na naghahanap ng ginto, na masayang kumakain, sa wakas ay naramdaman ang kanyang titig sa katawan nito, kaya mahigpit nitong pinihit ang ulo nito.


 Sa isang split segundo, nakatagpo ito ng isang pares ng mga nefariously na nakangiting mga mata.


 "Squeak!" 


Ang hamster na naghahanap ng ginto ay nag-squeal, at sa loob ng isang instant, nais nitong singilin patungo sa pintuan. Gayunpaman, bago ito makaalis, kinuha ito ng isang kamay at inilagay sa kabilang banda.


 "Squeak, squeak, squeak!" 


Sa kamay ni Yun Luofeng, ang hamster na hinahanap ng ginto ay dalawang beses nang kumalaban, at pagkatapos ay hinila nito ang mga daliri ni Yun Luofeng. Gayunpaman, ang balat ni Yun Luofeng ay hindi pa rin nasira sa ilalim ng pag-atake nito, at ang kanyang nakakagulat na mga mata ay kusang tinitigan ito ng isang malabong ngiti sa kanila.


 Sa wakas nawala ang lahat ng pag-asa at sumuko sa paghihirap. Ang expression nito ay napuno ng kawalang pag-asa; maiisip nito ang nakahihirap na hugis nito nang ito ay naging isang hamster na pagkain. 


"Little guy, paano ang tungkol sa pagsunod sa akin?" 


Kung kailan ang hamster na naghahanap ng ginto ay walang pag-asa sa punto na hindi masiraan ng loob upang mamutla, dahan-dahang binuksan ni Yun Luofeng ang kanyang bibig upang magtanong. Ang expression ng hamster na naghahanap ng ginto ay nabuhay muli. Namula ang mga mata nito at blangko na pinapanood ang napakagandang batang babae na may expression na nakangiting demonyo. Ano ang ibig niyang sabihin niyan? Hindi ito kailangang maging isang hamster na pagkain? 


"Alam kong maiintindihan mo ang aking mga salita. Sundan mo ako at maaari kang magkaroon ng gamot na makakain araw-araw. Paano ang tungkol dito?" 


Kung ang isang average na tao ay narinig mong sabihin na magkakaroon sila ng gamot na kakainin araw-araw kung susundin ka nila, tiyak na bibigyan ka nila ng isang pag-ikot ng pagkatalo. Ngunit ang hamster na naghahanap ng ginto ay iba! Matapos marinig ang mga salita ni Yun Luofeng, ang pares ng itim na mga mata ay naiilawan, nagmadali at may mabangis na tumango sa ulo nito, at namula nang isang beses.


 "Pagkatapos ay bibigyan kita ng isang pangalan," nilalaro ni Yun Luofeng kasama ang ginto na naghahanap ng ginto sa kanyang mga kamay, ang kanyang mga mata ay nagbubunyag ng isang masamang expression na nakangiting. 


"Nakikita na ang iyong kulay ay katulad ng gatas, tatawagin kita ng Milk Tea mula ngayon." 


"Squeak!" 

Ang hamster na naghahanap ng ginto ay tumugon nang may tunog. Hangga't mayroong gamot na kakainin araw-araw, hindi nito naisip kung ano ang pangalan na ibinigay nito.


 "Ang Spirit-Gathering Medicinal Liquid na ito ay naiwan mula sa aking paggamit. Hindi ito kapaki-pakinabang sa pagdaragdag ng iyong lakas. Hindi magtatagal, pupunta ako sa Medical Pavilion upang matulungan kang bumili ng ilang mga sangkap na herbal. Gayunpaman -" 


Tumigil si Yun Luofeng, " -Kapag sinusundan mo ako mula rito, hindi ka maaaring magkaroon ng anumang reserbasyon. Halimbawa, kapag kumuha ka ng ilang mga panggamot na gamot mula sa labas, dapat mo munang ibalik ito sa akin. " 


Matapos sabihin ang mga salitang ito, itinago ni Yun Luofeng ang Gatas ng Milk sa kanyang manggas at lumusot sa silid. Apat na araw! Siya ay nasa loob ng isang buong apat na araw. Sa loob ng mga apat na araw na ito, bukod kay Yun Xiao, na nakagamot sa kanyang mga pagkain, at Second Uncle, na nangangailangan sa kanya upang gumamit ng acupuncture upang malunasan ang kanyang mga binti, wala siyang ibang nakita. 


"young Miss, sa wakas lumitaw ka." Nang makita ng dalaga, si Qingyan, si Yun Luofeng na naglalakad sa likuran ng bundok, mabilis siyang lumakad, nagmamadaling nag-uulat, "Young Miss, na si Mu Shen ay muling dumating." 


"Mu Shen? Nakakuha na siya ng 45 milyong mga taels?"


 Si Yun Luofeng ay gaanong hinipo ang kanyang baba, na nagsasabing, "Qingyan, kailangan kong pumunta sa Medical Pavilion ngayon. Iiwan niya ang pera, at para sa anuman, hintayin niya ako sa hulihan ng hukuman bukas." 


Ito ay huli na, kaya hindi siya nagkaroon ng oras upang bigyang-pansin si Mu Shen. Saglit na tumitig si Qingyan. Di-nagtagal, nakita niya si Yun Luofeng na patungo sa likuran ng pintuan, at ang kanyang malaking mata ay napuno ng pagkalito. Mula pa nang nabigo ang Young Miss na magpakamatay, parang ... ang kanyang pagbabago ay sobrang sukat.


 Ang kanyang dating sarili ay habulin ang Crown Prince ng Kanyang Kahalagahan sa buong araw, ngunit ang kasalukuyang kanya sa halip ay tatakbo patungo sa Medical Pavilion buong araw ...

Si Luo Feng, henyo ng Hua Xia Medicial School, ay namatay dahil sa isang aksidente at ang kanyang kaluluwa ay naka-link sa walang katapusang miss na miss ng Miss Xia mainland. 

Ang pag-aaksaya ng isang pinakalumang miss na ito ay hindi lamang basahin o magsagawa ng martial arts, ngunit malaki ang dibdib, walang utak, ay mayabang at may gusto sa sarili. 

Dahil ang pagkakaroon ng korona na prinsipe bilang isang perpektong kasintahan ay hindi sapat, talagang inagaw niya ang isang medyo batang lalaki sa publiko, na humahantong sa korona ng prinsipe na nagwawakas sa kasal. Ngunit hindi niya mapigilan ang annulment at ibitin ang sarili. 

Pagbukas muli ng kanyang mga mata, hindi na siya ang nakaraang walang silbi na miss. Kinontrata niya ang isang papet ng Diyos at may dalang espiritwal na espasyo. Sa pamamagitan ng mga kamangha-manghang mga kamay na maaaring magbagong-buhay at mga kasanayang medikal na bumabagsak sa mundo! 

Parehong ang mga maharlikang inapo at maharlika sa itaas at ang mga mangangalakal sa ibaba, lahat ay nakikipagkumpitensya upang matanggap ang kanyang pabor. 

Maging ang Kanyang Royal Highness, ang korona na prinsipe, na dati nang sumira sa pakikipag-ugnay, ay pumatok sa pintuan na nais makipagkasundo. 

Kaugnay nito, isang mahiwagang lalaki ang sa wakas ay hindi makatiis: "Kung sino ang maglakas-loob na lumapit at manggulo sa aking babae, hayaan silang bumalik ngunit hindi na bumalik!"

[Eidolon Key]
isang malakas na artifact na maaaring tumawag ng celestial beast.
"Pwede ba talaga akong tumawag ng celestial beast gamit itong item na to?"
*DING*
*Yes, sa oras na makasummon ka ng isang celestial beast, magiging loyal sayo ito at ikaw lang ang kikilalanin niya bilang master*

"Hahaha ayos!" sigaw ni Ye Song.
Napatalon siya sa tuwa dahil hindi niya inaasahan na magkakaroon siya ng pagkakataon para makapagsummon ng pet!
Pwede niya itong gawing mount habang naghuhunt ng mga halimaw o kaya naman ay gamitin niya ito pang hunt ng halimaw habang siya ay nanonood lang sa gilid.
Hindi na nag atubili pa si Ye Song at dali-daling pinindot ang [Eidolon Key]. Nasasabik na siya kung anong uri ng pet ang kanyang makukuha!
[Gusto mo bang gamitin ang Eidolon Key?]
"Yes!"
[Establishing a connection on heavenly world, please wait a moment]

15%..
Nagkaroon ng kaunting paglindol ang lupa habang nag eestablish ng koneksyon ang [Eidolon Key] sa Heavenly World.
45%..
Habang tumatagal ay lalong lumalakas ang galaw ng lupa at nang ang koneksyon sa Heavenly World ay nasa kalahati na, nagsimulang dumilim ang kalangitan!
90%..
*DING*
[Connection complete!]
Isang portal ang biglang lumitaw sa harapan ni Ye Song.
Naglalabas ito ng nakakabulag na ilaw kaya pumikit siya upang protektahan ang kanyang mata.
Sa mga oras ding iyon, isang hayop ang naglalakad palabas sa portal.
Nang ma-adjust niya ang kanyang paningin, bumungad kay Ye Song ang isang hayop.

Ang hayop na ito ay nagbibigay ng vibe na siya ay isang celestial being!
Nang makita niya ang itsura nito, napabukas ang kanyang bunganga dahil sa gulat!
Hindi siya makapaniwala sa kanyang nakikita!
Ang nakita ni Ye Song ay ang daga na pinatay niya kanina ngunit mayroong kaunting pagkakaiba.
Muka na itong hamster ngayon!
Hindi na rin ito dambahula katulad ng dati, malaki pa din ito ngunit kasing laki na lang ito ng baka.
Malaki ang pisngi nito at mataba ang katawan, kapag tinitigan mo siya ay muka itong kaibig-ibig!
-
Ang Rat God ay nalilito kung ano ang nangyayari at sinubukan niyang alalahanin ang nangyari kanina.
"Namatay ba ako?  lumipat ba ako sa ibang mundo? hmm" sinabi ng Rat God sa kanyang sarili habang malalim ang iniisip.
Hindi napigilan ni Ye Song ang pag tawa nang marinig niya ang sinabi ng hamster dahil sa pagiging cute nito.
"Anong tinatawa mo diyan ah?!" tumingin ang Rat God sa direksyon kung saan niya narinig ang tawa.
Paglingon niya ay nakita niya ang isang binata na mukang pamilyar at nang ito ay titigan niya ay unti-unting bumalik ang kanyang alaala.
Nang mapagtanto niya kung sino ang binatang ito, nagsimula siyang manginig sa takot.
"I-Ikaw, P-paano.."
"Tinawag kita gamit ang susi na nakuha ko kanina"
"Ahh, ang swerte naman tsk. kahit na wala akong sinaktan, ganito pa rin ang nangyari saken. Sinummon mo ko pero bakit lumiit ang katawan ko! Malaki, cool at poging Rat God dapat ako nakakadismaya naman na pumangit ako 😞" naiiyak na sinabi ng hamster.

Ang hamster na ito ay may malaking pride! 😂
Napapangiti si Ye Song habang pinagmamasdan ang pagkadismaya ng hamster sa kasalukuyang itsura nito.
"Binalik ko ang buhay mo kaya ako na ang iyong master. simula ngayon, kailangan mong gawin ang makakaya mo para sundin ang mga utos ko"
Wala siyang balak pakawalan ang celestial being na ito dahil gusto niya itong makatulong sa kanya sa paghuhunt kaya naman kinumbinsi ni Ye Song ang Rat God na tanggapin siya bilang master ngunit ang Rat God ay napakataas ng pride at hindi tanggap ang pananaw ni Ye Song.
"Sana di mo na lang ako sinummon..." mahinang bulong ng Rat God.
Dahil sa kataasan ng pride ng Rat God ay naisip na ideya si Ye Song. ang mga katulad nitong Rat God ay mahilig sa mga pambobola!
"Makinig ka sa akin, medyo chubby nga ang mukha mo pero nagsilbi naman itong charm mo para magmuka kang cute at kaibig-ibig! parang ang sarap mo tuloy yakapin di ba!"
"Wahahaha!"
Ang simple mag-isip na Rat God ay madaling nakuha ang loob dahil sa pambobola ni Ye Song.
"Mabait si master, mukang okay naman siya pag silbihan" masayang sinabi ng Rat God.
"Oo naman, kailangan mo lang sundin ang mga utos ko sayo :)"
"Okay~ pero kailangan ko ng bagong pangalan master"
"Bakit?" Tanong ni Ye Song.
"Dahil panibagong buhay ko na ito, hindi na ako si Enimen"
Nag isip si Ye Song ng pangalan para sa demanding na hamster na kanyang sinummon.
"Master, mag isip ka ng magandang pangalan please~"
Mataas ang inaasahan ng Rat God sa kanyang bagong pangalan. Bilang isang god level monster, gusto niyang makakuha ng pangalan na nag nagkakatawan sa lakas at pride!
"Hmm simula ngayon, tatawagin kitang Ahoka!"
"Hindi ko alam kung ano yun pero tunog pa lang parang dominante na master! ano pong ibig sabihin nun?" masayang tanong ni Ahoka kay Ye Song.
"Ang ibig sabihin nun ay pinakamalakas na beast :)"
"Wow salamat master!"
[Ahoka LV.1]
Celestial Beast
Type: Pet
STATUS:
Skill:
[Unlocked at LV.10]
[Unlocked at LV.20]
[Unlocked at LV.30]
[Unlocked at LV.40]
[Unlocked at LV.50]
HP: 890
[MAX: 99,999]
MP: 320
[MAX: 99,999]
STR: 150
[MAX: 9,999]
VIT: 75
[MAX: 9,999]
DEX: 110
[MAX: 9,999]
AGI: 130
[MAX: 9,999]
INT: 25
[MAX: 9,999]
LUK: 8
[MAX: 999]
TITLES:
Rat God
Cute and Cuddly

Isang araw, biglang sumulpot ang mga halimaw na galing sa ibang dimensyon upang sakupin ang ating planeta. Sinubukan lumaban ng mga tao pero ang naging resulta ay kalunos-lunos.

Dahil dito, maliit na parte na lamang ng mundo ang natira para pamuhayan ng mga tao.

Pero bago maubos ang sangkatauhan, binigyan sila ng langit ng isang pagkakataon. Isa-isang nagkaroon ng kapangyarihan ang mga tao para maipagtanggol nila ang kanilang mga sarili.


Pero may isang tao na nagkaroon ng medyo kakaibang kapangyarihan...


Nagising si Ye Song mula sa mahimbing na pagkakatulog at nakita niya na ang mga halimaw ay nagsimulang maghasik ng karahasan.

"System, ano na ba level ko ngayon?"

*Ding*

*Ang level ng host ay 999*

Syaitan hamster berkata, "Saya tidak ada duit langsung."
"Ah? Awak tidak bawa duit semasa awak tinggalkan rumah? Awak tak tahu ke ayat 'tanpa duit, seseorang tidak boleh melangkah setapak pun ke depan'?" Ye Si berkata dengan riak wajah yang serius. 
"... Sebenarnya, saya boleh berikan awak batu rohani untuk menggantikan duit yang digunakan oleh orang biasa," kata syaitan hamster itu. 
"Saya pun ada batu rohani! Tapi kalau saya mahu pergi membeli-bela dan beli sesuatu, saya tidak boleh gunakan batu rohani!" kata Ye Si.
Selepas diam seketika, syaitan hamster itu berkata, "Kalau begitu, boleh saya bayar lain kali?"
"..." Ye Si. 
"Lupakanlah, saya akan belanja awak secara percuma kali ini. Tapi, lain kalau kalau awak keluar rumah, pastikan bawa duit tunai bersama. Duit sangat berguna dalam dunia utama," kata Ye Si dengan ikhlas kepada syaitan hamster itu.
Selepas bercakap sebanyak ini, dia menghulurkan tangannya dan dua teknik penyembuhan pun digunakan ke atas amster tersebut. Kebanyakan luka hamster itu agak ringan. Tambahan pula, Ye Si yang menyebabkan kecederaan itu. Oleh itu, dia tahu di mana yang memerlukan lebih rawatan. Selepas menikmati dua teknik penyembuhan tersebut, hamster itu boleh bergerak semula dengan sedikit usaha.
"Terima kasih," kata hamster itu. 
"Lain kali awak datang ke dunia utama, ingat, bawa Renminbi bersama awak!" Ye Si marah lagi. Selepas berkata sebanyak ini, dia kembali ke dalam badan Shuhang.
Selepas bangun, hamster itu menoleh ke arah Song Shuhang dan menggenggam tangannya, lalu berkata, "Kalau begitu, marilah berpisah di sini, Rakan Dao Shuhang."
Hamster itu agak malu. Sekarang ini dia telah menerima dua teknik penyembuhan daripada 'musuh', ia memalukan dan tidak boleh bertindak sombong seperti sebelumnya lagi.
Selepas bangun, ia segera mengucapkan selamat tinggal kepada Song Shuhang dan membuat keputusan untuk pergi.
Ia menggunakan azimat untuk mengawal arena pertempuran dan membuka pagar ruang, lalu bersedia untuk masuk ke dalamnya.
"Tunggu sekejap!" kata Song Shuhang terburu-buru. "Rakan Dao Hamster, boleh awak uruskan arena pertempuran ini sebelum pergi?"
Sesuatu yang sama telah terjadi dahulu. Selepas perlawanan tamat, hamster itu telah mencipta satu lubang kecil dan pergi sendiri, meninggalkan Song Shuhang. Mujurlah, Putih Yang Mulia ada waktu itu dan dia telah menggunakan kuasa ruang untuk mengeluarkan Song Shuhang daripada arena pertempuran tersebut. 
Namun, kali ini, Arena Pertempuran Dimensi telah dinaik taraf dan sehingga sekarang pun, Putih Yang Mulia tidak boleh menjumpainya. Jika hamster itu telah pergi tanpa membuang arena ini dahulu, Song Shuhang akan terperangkap di dalamnya. 
Hamster itu menepuk kepalanya dan berkata, "Saya hampir terlupa tentang arena itu. Sebenarnya, saya memang terfikir untuk meninggalkan awak terperangkap di dalam tempat ini. Dengan itu, awak tidak bolehlah menggoda tuan saya lagi."
"..." Song Shuhang. 
Awak buta ke apa?! Bila masa pula saya menggoda tuan awak?! Lagipun, Senior Putih Dua, tuan awak itu pun seorang lelaki, faham?
"O ya, saya akan serahkan ini kepada awak. Awak boleh anggap ia sebagai balasan untuk dua teknik penyembuhan ini," kata syaitan hamster itu dan mencampakkan azimat kecil ke arah Song Shuhang. "Awak boleh mengaktifkan azimat ini selagi awak menuang qi sejadi ke dalamnya. Apabila diaktifkan, azimat itu akan buatkan awak terus dapat dilihat. Selagi awak tidak berjumpa dengan Penguasa Tribulasi Tahap Sembilan, awak tidak perlu bimbang untuk diketahui. Disebabkan azimat inilah saya berjaya lari daripada pandangan pertapa manusia ini. Azimat ini masih boleh digunakan sebanyak dua atau tiga kali. Terserah awaklah bagaimana mahu menggunakannya."
Selepas bercakap sebanyak ini, syaitan hamster itu pun membuang arena pertempuran tersebut. 
Setelah itu, ia melompat ke dalam pagar ruang kecil, lalu hilang.
❄️❄️❄️
Selepas arena pertempuran itu hilang, tubuh Song Suhang tiba-tib muncul di atas puncak bandar terlarang.
Pada masa ini, rakan-rakan dao Kumpulan Nombor Satu Sembilan Wilayah telah berpindah ke tempat lain.
Namun masih ada beberapa orang yang tunggu di sana. 
Putih Yang Mulia memiliki riak wajah yang ingin tahu sambil mencangkung di atas bandar terlarang itu, kelihatan sedang mempelajari sesuatu. Nampaknya, sesuatu telah menarik minatnya.
Pari-pari Dongfang Enam sedang memegang burung kecil comel di tangannya dan sedang bercakap dengan burung ini dalam suara yang lembut. 
Abang Senior Tiga Alam dan Guoguo pula sedang duduk di satu penjuru di puncak bandar terlarang, menunggu dengan senyap.
Mahaguru Ubat dan Sungai Kabus Ungu pula duduk di sebelah Tiga Alam. 
"Kawan kecil Song Shuhang sudah keluar."
Daripada kedudukannya, Pari-pari Dongfang Enam merupakan orang pertama yang menyedari kepulangan Song Shuhang. 
Song Shuhang berkata, "Senior, maaf kerana buatkan awak semua bimbang."
Putih Yang Mulia berdiri dan berkata, "Shuhang, awak pergi ke mana tadi? Saya telah mengesan kuasa ruang turun naik dan seterusnya, awak tiba-tiba hilang. Saya tidak boleh mengunci posisi awak. Setelah itu, saya menemui beberapa kesan menarik di tempat awak hilang dalam kesan itu, terdapat sesuatu yang berkaitan dengan teknik magis yang menjamin 'tidak dapat dilihat', yang saya rasa sangat menarik. Ia terasa seperti sangat biasa dengan teknik pertapaan yang saya berlatih."
Song Shuhang membalas, "Macam ini... hamster itu telah heret saya ke dalam arena pertempuran lagi. Hamster yang saya katakan adalah hamster yang sama yang sama jumpa ketika pertempuran antara Akademi Awan Putih dengan syaitan Alam Kubur."
Putih Yang Mulia faham apa yang berlaku. "Jadi, ruang aneh itu lagi. Arena pertempuran itu telah meningkat ke kali ini?"
"Ya." Song Shuhang berfikir sejenak dan berikan azimat yang dicampakkan oleh syaitan hamster itu tadi kepada Putih Yang Mulia. "Senior Putih, jika awak berminat dalam teknik magis yang menjamin kemahiran tidak dapat dilihat, awak boleh lihat azimat ini. Azimat ini adalah barang yang digunakan oleh hamster itu untuk menjadi sesuatu yang tidak dapat dilihat."
Mata Putih Yang Mulia bersinar sambil dia memegang azimat kecil itu dan mula mengkajinya. 
"Kawan kecil Shuhang, awak tidak cedera, bukan?" kali ini Mahaguru Ubat pula yang bertanya. 
"Saya tidak cedera pun. Terima kasih atas keperiatinan awak, Senior," Song Shuhang menjawab. 
"Lega saya kalau begitu. Rakan-rakan Dao, Kabus Ungu dan saya pergi dululah kalau begitu," kata Mahaguru Ubat sambil tersenyum hangat. 
Sebenarnya, yang lain masih tidak biasa dengan Mahaguru Ubat versi budak lelaki mesra ini.
Song Shuhang teringat sesuatu dan bertanya, "Oh ya, Senior Mahaguru Ubat, bila awak ada masa lapang? Saya mahu tanya awak beberapa perkara tentang pil ubatan."
"Oh begitu. Awak boleh datang dan cari saya bila-bila masa sahaja," kata Mahaguru Ubat sambil tersenyum. 
Song Suhang menjawab, "Terima kasih Senior."
"Sama-sama," Selepas bercakap sebanyak ini, dia pun pergi bersama dengan Sungai Kabus Ungu. 
Seterusnya, Abang Senior Tiga Alam pun datang bersama dengan Guoguo. "Shuhang, saya perlu berterima kasih kepada awak kerana menjaga Guoguo dan yang lain beberapa hari lalu. Tiga orang budak itu mesti memeningkan kepala awak."
"Sebenarnya, kebanyakan masa, mereka patuh juga," kata Song Shuhang. Ya, tiga orang budak itu telah menjadi sangat mendengar kata selepas dia menyebat Guoguo dan Zhu dengan kejamnya.
"Guoguo memberitahu saya segala yang berlaku. Sebab itulah saya kata budak tidak mendengar kata akan patuh kalau menerima sebatan!" Abang Senior Tiga Alam berkata sambil tersenyum. 
Selepas bercakap sebanyak ini, Abang Senior Tiga Alam mengeluarkan bebola benang sutera putih, lalu memberikannya kepada Song Shuhang. "Shuhang, ini adalah hadiah menarik yang saya janji untuk berikan kepada awak sebelum ini."
"Apa ini?" Song Shuhang bertanya kerana ingin tahu.
"Ini adalah sesuatu yang dikenali sebagai 'benang bilah' dan ia merupakan bahan tiruan. Oh ya, awak telah lihat pedang orb yang digunakan oleh Pertapa Bebas Sungai Utara semasa pertempuran menentang Senior Trigram Tembaga tadi? Benang bilah inilah salah satu bahan mentah bagi menghasilkan pedang orb," Abang Senior Tiga Alam memberi penjelasan. "Benang bilah ini adalah bahan mentah dengan ciri-ciri tajam yang digunakan untuk memalsukan pedang orb jenis pemotong. Apabila saya tiba-tiba perlu menguruskan beberapa perkara beberapa hari lalu, saya perlu mengutip benang bilah ini. Saya sudah dapatkannya, jadi saya berikan bebola ini untuk awak."
"Jadi, inilah bahan yang digunakan untuk memalsukan pedang orb! Hebat." Song Shuhang mengeluh beremosi dan berkata, "Malangnya, saya hanya bagus dengan pedang lengkung."
"Ahahaha." Abang Senior Tiga Alam ketawa dan menepuk bahu Song Shuhang. "Mungkin awak boleh dapatkan pedang lengkung orb atau sesuatu yang sama dengannya?"
Song Shuhang menjelingkan matanya. "Pedang lengkung orb? Awak mahu saya gunakan benang untuk mengentalkan pedang lengkung yang besar?"
"Ahahaha. Cukuplah buat kelakar. Oleh sebab awak baik-baik sahaja, Si kecil Guoguo dan saya juga akan pergi. Sudah tiba masa untuk tidur bagi lelaki kecil ini," kata Abang Senior Tiga Alam. 
"Abang Senior Shuhang, selamat tinggal," sami kecil itu berkata sambil menggosok matanya. 
Song Shuhang melambaikan tangannya dan berkata, "Selamat tinggal."
Abang Senior Tiga Alam mengendalikan pedang terbang dan pergi bersama dengan sami kecil itu. 
Para pertapa Alam Tahap Empat boleh menunggang pedang terbang, hebatnya! Song Shuhang juga sedang ternanti-nanti untuk melakukan perkara yang sama. Pada masa ini, dia tidak terlalu jauh untuk meningkat ke Alam Tahap Empat dan dia telah pun membuka tiga daripada empat meridian misteri Tahap Tiga, iaitu Median Matahari Terik. 
Kini, dia hanya perlu membuka Meridian Raja Tidak Berbentuk untuk mendapatkan kelayakan bagi meningkat ke Alam Tahap Empat.
Walau bagaimanapun, masih banyak perkara yang mahu dilakukan sebelum mengecapi Tahap Empat. 
Dia perlu mempelajari beberapa formasi tambahan yang boleh membantunya semasa tribulasi. Lagipun, tribulasi syurgawi Tahap Empat pun boleh tahan juga dan dia tiada niat untuk mati dalam proses itu. 
Selepas Abang Senior Tiga Alam pergi, Oari-pari Dongfang Enam mendekati Song Shuhang sambil memegang burung kecil di tangannya. 
Kemudian, dia menghulurkan tangannya dan menyerahkan Si kecil Cai kepada Song Shuhang. 
"Eh? Si kecil Cai!" Song Shuhang boleh mengenali burung ini dengan sekali pandang sahaja. Ia adalah raksasa burung yang telah meluahkan perasaan kepada pemburu raksasa pertengahan umur bernama 'Yan Shao' selepas betukar menjadi bentuk manusia.
Malangnya, cinta ini nampaknya hanyalah lawak dari Tuhan dan Si kecil Cai hampir terkurung seumur hidup selepas dia meluahkan perasaan kepada pemburu raksasa itu.
"Si kecil Cai berkata yang dia mahu meluahkan rasa bersyukurnya sendiri," kata Pari-pari Dongfang Enam sambil tersenyum. 
Si kecil Cai kemudiannya mengangkat kepalanya dan berkata dalam suara yang jelas dan tajam "Encik Shuhang, terima kasih kerana selamatkan saya. Selain itu, saya juga berterima kasih kepada awak untuk Benih Teratai Emas Mulia dan air mata air itu."
"Sama-sama, tidak mengapa." Song Shuhang menghulurkan tangannya dan mengambil Si kecil Cai, lalu mengusap bulunya dengan lembut. 
Semoga, burung kecil ini akan segera sembuh daripada sakit yang diterima setelah luahan perasaan itu. 
Raksasa burung Si kecil Cai menoleh kepalanya ke belakang, kelihatan sangat selesa dan kemudian bertanya, "Encik Shuhang, boleh awak beritahu saya kenapa raksasa dan manusia tidak boleh bercinta?"
"Siapa kata raksasa dan manusia tidak boleh bercinta?" Song Shuhang bertanya semula. "Walaupun saya menjadi pertapa tidaklah begitu lama, tapi saya nampak dalam Pertapa Harian yang beberapa pertapa berkuasa telah memilih pertapa raksasa sebagai teman mereka."
Si kecil Cai mengeluh beremosi dan berkata, "Oh, salah soalan... maksud saya, raksasa dan pemburu raksasa. Kenapa mereka tidak boleh bercinta?"
"saya rasa mungkin lebih baik awak tanya sendiri kepada pemburu raksasa tentangnya," jawab Song Shuhang. Namun selepas berfikir sejenak, dia menambah, "Sebenarnya, saya mempunyai kawan pemburu raksasa dan dia kata yang setiap kali pemburu raksasa mendapati diri mereka berada di depan 'raksasa', mereka akan mempunyai gerak hati yang aneh untuk menangkap dan membunuh raksasa itu dan mereka tidak boleh mengawalnya."
Selepas mendapati yang Pengarah merupakan pemburu raksasa, Song Shuhang akhirnya faham 'gerak hati' yang kawannya ceritakan sebelum ini.
Disebabkan oleh gerak hati aneh ini, permusuhan akan lahir setiap kali raksasa berjumpa dengan pemburu raksasa. 


Satu hari, Song Shuhang dimasukkan dalam satu kumpulan perbualan yang terdiri daripada orang-orang tua yang menghidap penyakit mental. Mereka memanggil setiap ahli sebagai Rakan Dao dan pelbagai nama panggilan yang lain seperti Mahaguru Istana, Ketua Gua, Raja Agung, Mahaguru Abadi dan lain-lain. Haiwan peliharaan ketua kumpulan yang telah lari dari rumahnya itu juga dipanggil dengan panggilan Anjing Raksasa. Perbualan harian mereka biasanya melibatkan tentang cara menapis ubat, meneroka ke kawasan tinggalan sejarah atau berkongsi pengalaman tentang teknik-teknik untuk kemahiran tertentu. 
Selepas beberapa lama dia berada dalam kumpulan perbualan itu, tak semua benda seperti yang disangka...


Looking at Little Celery's astonished face, Zhang Zian laughed, "Don't you talk to the little hamster and Mini Lop?"
"Yes, but…" Little Celery was confused. "Adults don't talk to pets…"
Zhang Zian pointed at himlself, "Do I look like a normal adult?"
Little Celery thought about it, "Maybe not."
"That's true. I am a special man. You are a special girl. We don't have to worry about what other people think," Zhang Zian put the skewers back in the lunch box, "Little Celery, this might be too hard for you to comprehend. There are two kinds of people in this world. One follows what other people do and the other stays true to their heart and does not care about what others think."
Little Celery was even more confused.
"It's okay if you don't understand. I am trying to tell you that you don't have to follow what other people do. You should try your best to be yourself and be a good student."
Little Celery thought for a minute and said, "That means I should do what I am doing."
"Yes. What you are doing is already great!"
Zhang Zian knew from their conversation when they walked up to the store that there were a few naughty boys in her class that always caused trouble. She didn't like them.
Zhang Zian couldn't really do anything about it, so he tried his best to encourage her. 
"Okay," Little Celery again went into deep thought and then nodded confusedly, "I see."
"Don't overthink it. Let it be," Zhang Zian knew that she wouldn't understand fully at this age. If she overthinked it, it would only make her unhappy. She was only a little kid. She deserved to be happy. 
"Oh, right, Mr. Manager, when you talk to them, do you think they understand?" Little Celery curiously stared at Snowy Lionet, who was eating the chicken.
"Of course, didn't you see them meow to answer me?" he answered affirmatively. 
"Really?! So, they meow to talk to you?" Amazed, Little Celery's mouth opened into an O-shape. She turned back to the little hamster and Mini Lop, "So do you think Xiao Ling and Ear can understand me?"
"Oh. You named them Xiao Ling and Ear?" Zhang Zian laughed, "I am sure they understand. Hamsters and Mini Lops don't meow, so they can't talk back."
"That's great! I never thought they understood. I thought it was only me talking to myself…" Little Celery was happily surprised. 
Zhang Zian wasn't sure if the hamster and the Mini Lop could understand her, but he was quite sure that they could feel her love. 
"Are they going to turn into a person someday?" Little Celery looked at him with hope. 
Looking into her eyes, Zhang Zian decided to tell a white lie. "Yes, if you keep talking to them, one day they will turn into a person and play games with you,"
"Really? That is great!" Little Celery jumped up and down, cheering. 
Zhang Zian looked at her with a real smile on his face. 
Someday, Little Celery would grow up and find out that there was no Santa Claus and a princess didn't always marry a prince, but she would remember when Mr. Manager told her a joke about animals turning into humans… Childhood was priceless. He wished her to enjoy it as long as possible. 
Little Celery tore open the zip-lock bag, and took out the nuts and dried fruits to feed the hamster and Mini Lop. She said seriously as she fed them, "Slow down. I can get more for you."
When they were chewing with their mouths full of food, she stared at them and said happily, "Xiao Ling, Ear, I haven't seen you in a long time. Did you miss me?"
The hamster and Mini Lop glanced at the source of the voice, then continued chewing on the food. 
"Mr. Manager said you can understand me, right?" Little Celery asked.
Fina, Old Time Tea and Snowy Lionet finished breakfast. Zhang Zian was picking up their bowls. Neither him nor Little Celery was expecting a response from the hamster and the Mini Lop.
However…
"Little Celery, long time no see."
A strange voice appeared all of a sudden.
The voice was soft but low, so you couldn't tell the gender. Zhang Zian was sure he had never heard that voice before. 
He was terrified and almost threw the bowls in his hands thinking that a thief had come in. 
He turned around and found that Little Celery was extremely excited. 
"Brother Manager, you are right. Xiao Ling and Ear are talking to me!" Little Celery was so excited that her cheeks and ears all turned red, "I am not sure who was talking to me, Xiao Ling or Ear?"
Zhang Zian was still scared. Glancing through the store, there was no one in there besides him and Little Celery. He turned to Old Time Tea for help. 
Old Time Tea also looked surprised. Its eyes screened through the store like a radar but found nothing. 
Fina opened up its eyes and stood up from the tall cat tree. It was on top of the store so it could spot the thief as soon as possible. 
Snowy Lionet didn't care and it continued to look at Fina's tail and daydream.
Galaxy also didn't care and continued its game with the kittens. 
Was it… a ghost?
Zhang Zian thought he had made a mistake, but everyone in the store heard the voice. 
Old Time Tea raised a paw and pointed at the direction behind Zhang Zian.
He turned around and looked…
What the f*ck?! It was the b*tchy bird!
Richard was hiding behind the display cabinet of the hamster and Mini Lop, giggling and winking at Zhang Zian.
"I am Xiao Ling. Can't you tell this is my voice? That breaks my heart!" Richard said in the same voice.
"Oh, Xiao Ling. I am sorry I couldn't tell it was your voice," Little Celery apologized to the hamster, who was eating the nuts and dried fruit.
"That's fine. You don't have to apologize. We are friends, right? No apology is needed between friends," Richard continued the show. 
Knowing that they were okay, Zhang Zian relaxed. Old Time Tea kept on watching TV. Fina stared at Richard and laid back down on the cat tree. 
"Yup, we are friends. Good friend. Best friends forever!" Little Celery nodded. 
"So only it is your friend, and I am not?"
A strange, gentle voice that sounded like a girl appeared this time. 
"Oh?" Little Celery was again surprised. 
"It is me, Ear. Don't you call me Ear?"
Little Celery was even more excited. Putting her face against the cage, "Ear, are you talking to me?"
"Of course, am I your friend?"
"Yes, yes, yes! You and Xiao Ling are both my friends!" Little Celery confirmed. 
"Okay. Let me tell you as a friend that you are almost late for school!"
Little Celery realized she had to go!
"Xiao Ling, Ear, Mr. Manager, I am sorry I have to go. I will come see you tomorrow!" She waved in a rush and ran out of the store to go to her school. 
Richard flapped its wings and landed on Zhang Zian's shoulder, "Lolita complex?"
"What the f*ck?! Shut up!" Zhang Zian laughed.
For the first time, he realized Richard's voice was quite useful sometimes.


1. Download a suspicious game
2. Catch a few magical pets as partners
3. Go through interesting daily routines and lead the pet shop to a whole new level

Manuel stares at the photo on the computer screen like a psychopath,
"So this is what the wife of Hades looks like."

I cannot believe my eyes. A beautiful graceful blonde smiles playfully into the camera next to that fugly monster.

There are two reasons why they are together:

Money

Money

MONEY!!!


"We need reinforcement", I say.

Manuel snaps his fingers, "No problem! We have Angela, Julius Plato S., Emo Ute..."

"And ice block. Diablo could freeze the wife of the anti-burrito dwarf with his icy aura."

"I'm going to recruit my cousins."

That actually doesn't sound like a stupid plan.

"I'll round everyone up.", I grin and for the first time in forever I feel something that could be described as "hope".

About 30 minutes later, the entire crew has gathered in Manuel's burrito cave.

"Oh, there's a dead hamster lol."

I lose my faith in humanity.

"All living beings are doomed to death's scythe. We are namely prisoners of this fate and slaves to our instincts. And as we lose sight of our finality, we begin to crave more and more worldly resources such as food and other pleasures and forget the true meaning of our lives. We want to fulfill the duty of producing offspring like our animal counterparts instead, only to disappear into posterity in the end stuck in our foolish self-righteousness, believing we have taught our children the 'right' values. But he who brings virtue also brings vice.
Exactly because of those values, however, there's an even greater burden for man to bear.
Moral thinking and understanding distinguishes us from the animals. We became smart, but also more arrogant because of our intelligence. Unfortunately, wisdom is exactly man's fatal flaw, which Christian theologians call 'original sin'. Our wisdom leads to the fact that death is felt as something unnatural. We become afraid of the fading of the self by the complete extinction and annihilation of the mortal body and see the 'new birth' in the ether not as redemption from the body, but damnation, because we are afraid of the uncertainty of non-existence. We should seek to reduce ourselves to nothing to numb the vice we brought upon this world. As we were born from nothing, we shall return to nothing.", Emo Ute says.

My faith is no longer lost, but hung on the gallows, shot, chased under the combine, burned and reduced to atoms, then on its ashes Manuel danced Macarena three times in the tune of the Super Mario Theme.

"Kate?"

I stare at the wall, mind numb, and subject myself to these depressing thoughts.

"How do you want to make her go away.", the wood log asks in such a monotone voice that I didn't notice that it was a question at first.

"Ist doch klar!", beginnt das VSCO girl.

"Isn't it obvious?", the VSCO girl begins. I hope she'll choke on her bubble tea in her hydro flasksksks.

"We take her beauty away! Then he's gonna throw her away like a plastic straw!", she gleams.

Manuel draws his brows together, "And how do you want to do that?"

"Yo, scallywags, we'll jus' loot off her make-up!", Julius Plato S. says. "Arrrr.", he adds.

"What a dumb idea!", I protest, "I know how. We'll send her to a very special hair stylist who'll ruin her hair!"

For a few seconds, silence lingered in the round.
"Arrr, me spouse be a hairdresser." The old man again. "She earns somethin' like that on top o' her pension. I'll tell her wha' we be up t'."

"Great, and how are we going to reel her in?" Manuel asks skeptically.
"With a voucher!", Angela Merle sings.

Emo Ute begins to tremble,
"Diablo. I have to confess something to you."

She takes a deep breath and chokes.

After a coughing fit and a brief respite, she has regained her voice. The foolish thing, however, is that she now sounds like a drug-addicted pubescent eighth grader, just like Manuel.

She inhales deeply,

"At which hour thee taint'd mine own heart with sweetness, t'was a slippery slope,
oh, woe, I am in love with a knave from the grove. 
mine own second wing, mine own ladybird,
I wast not a blinking idiot f'r passion,
anon t's thee I am wanting. 
Would thee beest mine? Would thee beest mine tonight?
Couldst beest kissing mine own fruit punch lips in the bright sunshine
for I like thee quite a lot, everything thee did get, thee not knoweth?
T's thee yond i adore, though i maketh the boys falleth like dominoes."

"Ok.", he answers.

I start scratching my head.

"What's the second step?", I can feel the excitement rising up inside me.
"When we have taken away her beauty, we have to take the anti-burrito guy's job next."

A creepy grin begins to form on Manuel's face. He looks like the dead hamster.

"With the hamster corpse!", Mrs. Tomie suddenly appears.
"Mrs. Tomie?! Go away! You are not plot-relevant and do not appear in this arc!", I shout indignantly. I didn't even invite her.

I sigh and continue, "My idea is, we have to find his favorite restaurant which he also inspected and have the hamster show up there. When authorities find out that he basically lied about the authenticity of the food, he'll lose his job."
I have to admit, I didn't think it through. Whatever.

"And how are you going to find out his favorite restaurant?" Asks Ms. Tomie.

"I told you to get lost!"

"It says so on Facebook, Chinese.", Manuel replies and points to the photo of him in a chic asian restaurant on the computer screen.

"Alright, then let's do it that way."

I hide a dark secret...

When night falls, I like to run across the streets without looking left and right, hoping to be run over someday. The only driving force in my life is waiting for the day I die. I scream, but no one hears me.
Especially at school, I am constantly reminded of this bleak reality: I'm surrounded by idiots!


German to English translation and edit by Engelhardt. This book is a free-time project by Engelhardt and Ramon and is supposed to parody bad writing.

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