Chapter 72: A Land of Opportunities
We traveled east to the nearest Motor Forge and took our first trip into the heart of the world. We rode the dark tunnel into the glowing red core where giants worked stone anvils and the Guardian of Metal, a deific being shaped as and voiced by Ozzy Osborne waited impatiently.
"About fucking time!" He shouted as we stopped in front of him, "I have been waiting for you both since you got here. Sick bike by the way."
"I wanted to collect a bunch of fire tributes before coming here." I admitted, "I hate seeing things I can't afford. Makes my hands itchy."
"And we wouldn't want that." The Guardian smirked, "The gods were very pleased by your arrival. Two maniacal ministers of Metal moving through the multiverse. People who eat, sleep, and breathe brutal, it would have been a fucking shame if you didn't come to our corner of existence."
"We're fucking stoked to be here." Jack grinned and shouted, "ALL ABOARD!"
"AYE AYE AYE!" The Guardian of Metal crowed then coughed into his hand in embarrassment, "I don't know what came over me there. Anyway, it's good that you've started the process of becoming demigods. Keep that up." He mused, "There are several more opportunities available to you should you wish it."
"Lay it on us." I grinned.
"You have within your possession several demonic artifacts that can be empowered while you are here. A certain hammer, ring, and sword."
"Neat." I said.
"Very," he agreed, "Now Malacath is a demon god the Titan's approve of, give me the hammer and it will be reforged to contain Ormagoden's flesh, blood, scream, and fire. The latter two will require a little augmenting on your end to express. As for the ring, Namira will require a bit of a specific pleasing to grow the power of her artifact. Eat the liver of Doviculus if you want the ring to power up. I have personally partaken in some nasty meals, but to eat the liver of a guy that calls himself an infection. Fucking nasty, man. And the blade…"
Ozzy looked like he didn't want to speak of it.
"We Metal Heads are fine with a lot of shit, but we are brothers and betrayal has always been a step too far." he shook his head, "The gods will have nothing to do with the blade; however, there is a sea - a lake some may call it - of black tears. Use the blade to destroy that ancient abyss of treachery and madness and it will become more powerful than it was ever intended to become."
I tossed him my hammer and he returned with the beast reforged.
"Don't mind the lack of weight in the hand, its mass has become a bit conceptual after the union. Light as a feather, but striking like an enraged dragon's tail. Better yet, the more blood shed with the hammer the stronger it becomes. I doubt you will have any qualms feeding the beast." The Guardian chuckled as he handed me my reforged hammer.
The metal of the hammer had darkened and taken on an incredible gloss. The heart of the hammer had transitioned from a blood red to a fiery liquid orange.
"Sweet work on the hammer, but what can you guys do for our wheels?" Jack asked.
"So much." Ozzy grinned and we spent our fire tributes upgrading the power of our motorcycle and its guns, as well as the quality of the tires and suspension, and picked up a sick Ace of Hades paint job.
"I'd also recommend a trip to the Spider Queen's layer." He spoke, "Get yourselves some more powerful strings and a proper job restoring that bass guitar and six string. They should be able to continue working their basic magic even across the lines of the universes. Healing and inspiring respectively."
"Thanks, Guardian of Metal." I tipped my head to the man, "We're off to take divine power for ourselves."
"Go forth and shine the glory of Ormagoden on the multiverse!" The Guardian screamed as we took off back to the surface world.
Our trip to the Motor Forge had raised our spirits considerably. So what if we weren't going on a badass adventure with a pack of good friends, we had quite a few new opportunities to hunt down, the first of which had me waiting out in front of the Spider Queen's Lair while Jack ran a stealth run on the eight legged freaks. She returned with enough strings to upgrade a dozen guitars and we set off to pick up more fire tokens via jumps and dragon statues so we could purchase some excellent power ups for our instruments.
We soon discovered what the fire of Ormagoden did for us when we freed our fortieth statue. Jack could now ignite her biotic powers, causing them to burn anyone caught in them and explode in fiery conflagrations when she detonated a combo attack. I gained the power to breathe fire. I could now murder foes with fireballs and streams from my mouth, but the more important aspect was the ability to heat up metals using my breath. Not only did my breath heat metals faster, but made the metal easier to work with, more pliable to my will. This would be a godsend for more stubborn materials like the titanium gold I used to build my power armor all those years ago, or especially the Phrik from Star Wars. That stuff really didn't want to cooperate.
While we were exploring the northern coastline, we encountered Fletus, a Road Demon of the Motor Freeks clan. The big grey bastard was standing by his car just waiting for challengers when we came up. I briefly wondered how he ate when his teeth were all smoking exhaust pipes.
"That's a sick bike, boy." he grinned, "But you won't be getting any respect in this world unless you build a car and learn to race."
"Is that so?" Jack asked with healthy skepticism.
"It is, lass." the Road Demon answered, "The clan has a garage nearby. Let's see what kind of instincts you got, boy."
The Motor Freeks garage was packed full of cars being worked on and the various demons working on them. They were a colorful and shapely bunch, and by that I mean they were all sorts of weird colors and shapes, not that I wasn't in the same boat.
"Got a new build!" Fletus shouted and the work in the huge garage stopped, "Go on, boy. Show us what you got."
With the parts available and some quick applications of my metal forging breath I put together a convertible muscle car with a turbocharged twelve cylinder engine and a pair of boost tanks on the back. They had some nice off-roading tires and suspensions that I helped myself to and a classy chrome air scoop. I engraved 'The Good Evening' on the shiny grill and called it a day.
"Wheeew!" Fletus whistled, "Damn, boy. You got talent," he admitted then shouted to the rest of the garage, "But can he race?"
"Race! Race! Race!" The demons shouted and led us out to a nearby starting line.
"Just follow the spotlight!" Fletus grinned and revved the engine of his muscle car, The Squealer.
"Blow doors down, babe." Jack ordered from the passenger seat.
We raced along the roads of the cliff strewn northern coast being guided by a magical spot light beaming down from the heavens. Either the Druid Plow is faster than my car, or the game went too easy on Eddie, cause the Road Demon dogged my rearview the entire time and I remember being able to crash my car and still beat this dude in the game.
In the end we won the race and picked up a nice fire tribute from the Titans and some street cred with the Motor Freeks. I ended up racing a few more of them with similar to far greater results, making my grin wider with each new win and the incoming love of the Metal gods.
The Road Demons threw a huge party in honor of my wins and we left the next morning with a new social circle and the location of other Motor Freek garages marked on our map.
We spent our days scouring the Brutal Lands, raising Buried Metal, hunting down the Tab Slabs, freeing the Bound Serpents, Viewing Legends and Landmarks, jumping through clouds of Lighting Plug Bugs, and winning races which became all the easier after a couple of trips to the Motor Forge turned The Good Evening into a howling beast of speed and power.
Jack and I freed the final Bound Serpent Statue deep in the jungles of the eastern Brutal Lands. I can't imagine why we would save the jungle for the end of our continent crossing journey. No, I certainly can't imagine why a giant lizard man of obscene sexual prowess would hope to have no reason to leave the jungle anytime soon.
Oh no, is that the Zaulia surrounding us.
I can't imagine how this is going to turn out for us.
CREATORS' THOUGHTS 
JManM
JManM If you want to support me and my family and contribute to the Bonus Chapter Stockpile, you can do so at
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Chapter 73: Carry That Weight
I sat at the head of my oversized bed in the back of my jungle palace serenading a pile of fucked unconscious women who look like they should be on the cover of a Manowar album with my magical bass guitar. In thirty minutes or so they should be ready to go again.
Jack and I had always been on the extreme end of sexual appetites, but since transitioning to demigodhood things had cranked up even further. I now understand Zeus. People always give him shit for being such a horny fucker, and he deserves most of it as the guy was very rapacious, but I get it. Randy as a god is no joke.
All that power, all that ego, all that brain blood descending to your boner. It's a recipe for fucked up choices. Dude should have taken a tribe of sexy Amazonians who paint their faces like KISS to serve as his harem so he wouldn't feel the need to turn into animals and rape people. I know I certainly don't feel the need to turn into an animal and rape people, so I must be doing something right.
Jack had left already to go play in the tank I made called The Good Nait. She loved riding around in that thing and shooting the laser panthers that terrorize our new jungle kingdom. I preferred beating them into submission and making them live in my kitty conservatory, but the wife wasn't as thrilled with them trying to burn her tattoos off with their death beam eyes. To be fair if they could do more than tickle me with those laser peepers of theirs I'd be on board to kill them all.
While Jack spent her days taming the fearsome jungle, I spent mine trying to build the Zaulia into something more than a late development addition, and with the powers of Brutal Lands demon teleportation I had no troubles doing it. I was only a spell away from any resource I may need be it part, material, or beast.
I built a forge where I attempted to recreate some of the feats of the Titans, such as making armor that made a warrior faster. My many failures made me begin to suspect that the Titans were far more technologically advanced than their backstory would imply. While they certainly maintained a specific aesthetic as barbarian warriors, my experimentation into the energy produced by the 'fans' of this world revealed it to be incredibly potent.
I believe that specific feat was achieved through a power armor, likely similar to the later Mjolnir versions used by the Spartans in Halo. Through a neural interface the armor would move faster than the body through the use of superconductors simulating a nervous system in the armor picking up the commands in the brain and carrying the signal faster than even the Spartan's augmented nerves could achieve.
It would take me years of experimentation to see if I was right, years I didn't intend to spend here despite the setting proving very enriching and pleasurable.
"Your holiness!" an excited younger Zaulia messenger entered the boudoir and kneeled, "A car of unknown make has approached the palace."
"Describe it." I commanded as I stopped strumming my guitar.
"Long and black, decorated with a skull in the engine block and purple painted flames." the girl answered.
"Thank you, my dear." I grinned, "It seems I will be having an acquaintance at my table for breakfast today."
Though meeting her naked would be the comfortable alpha move, I didn't feel a particular need to mesmerize Drowned Ophelia. I pulled on my pants and belt and headed down to my dinning room where a table waited with various fruits prepared for easy eating while the cook would bring out fresh grilled and roasted meats after I sat down.
Ophelia timed things just right as the meat had just been delivered when she stepped into the room.
"Love the look, girl." I chuckled, "Always preferred my goth girls with huge tits, but you pull it off well enough."
"You certainly know how to make a girl feel wanted, Grunt, and pissed off too." Drowned Ophelia growled as she took a seat at the table.
"I'd offer to carve, but I hear Eddie already beat me to it." I laughed, "The human revolution really must have meant something big before it all went to shit. Now look at you. A shade of a girl."
"Lars really did choose his hill to die on." Ophelia sighed, "Just like you said. And with him gone it didn't take Lita anytime at all to turn Eddie against me. Eddie, who was supposed to love me. Trust me. Just a few words was all it took for him to 'carve' my heart out."
"And a sad girl followed the call of the Black Tears, the sorrow of Aetulia harmonizing with her mournful soul." I added.
"They made it real easy for me." Drowned Ophelia stated, "Eddie is trying to cross the gorge and traverse the jungle to get to the Sea. I want you to join forces with me and stop him."
"And what do you have that I want?" I chuckled at the offer.
"Vengeance, mayhem, slaughter." Ophelia answered without hesitation.
I might have to check the perimeter for spies, cause girl knows me.
"Nice keywords." I grinned, "Of course vengeance would have required the humans to have hurt me."
"They rejected you. Spat in your face." Drowned Ophelia growled.
"If anyone spat in my face there would be no need for talks of vengeance." I stated, "There would just be vengeance. Immediate and violent. And rejection, a heart that can't take rejection is too timid by far to survive in my chest. My immune system wouldn't tolerate its weakness."
"Then what do you want, Grunt?" Ophelia hissed, "What do I have to give you to make an alliance?"
I stood up and clenched my fist, "I want everything you can think of, money and women, power and sex, status, glory, I demand the finer things. And in my entire life there hasn't been anyone or any group strong enough to stop me from taking them. You, Eddie, Doviculus… all of you can clash for my amusement, your drama a fine performance and all the world a stage. And if I get bored I'll show up and crush you all myself. Violence and mayhem achieved."
"You really think you're that much greater than all of us?" She scoffed, "That this whole world is yours to take anytime you get tired of your harem of jungle sluts?"
"You don't want me to come over there and prove it." I growled, "Get out while you can, cause if you stay here any longer I'll give you a real reason for sorrow and fear."
Drowned Ophelia raised her arm and tried to impale me on a spike made of black tears that came to a stop harmlessly on the scales of my chest.
"You aren't the first woman of your complexion to try to murder me in my home." I chuckled and exploded across the table in a burst of speed like a wildcat. I wrapped a hand around Ophelia's head and slammed her down face first into the table, "Tell me girl. Can you feel with that constructed body everything a real woman feels."
"Do your worst." Ophelia managed to growl out from under my grip.
"My dear, you would not survive my worst." I laughed and then whispered into her ear, "And you are going to carry that weight."
CREATORS' THOUGHTS
JManM
JManM
Would have wrote more but I am very tired. The begining of Grunt's monologue is one of the best things to come out of Full Metal Alchemist.
I ended up watching Eureka Seven with my son today. Not the whole thing obviously as it is fifty episodes with a sequal I hadn't heard of before. Made me honestly want to put Jack and Grunt in a Mecha world, but I don't think I realy have the heart to do all the research it would take to be fun.
If you want to support me and my family and contribute to the bonus chapter pool you can do so at
ko - fi . com / jmanm
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