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Awesome read! There's only three chapters so far but the world and the characters are beautifully painted (or war-painted). I'm a sucker for wars on paper, both steel-armed and political. And I can't wait to get to the latter. Also excited on what will become of Cornelius and Commodus. Only reason I didn't give full marks was the shifting tenses. But that can be easily remedied. I'd suggest to pick one and stick to it throughout. It's minor though and only slightly took me away from the fantasy. I hope this comment doesn't come off as harsh criticism but as fellow advice from a fellow author to another. Advice aside, this story was a breath of fresh air. I'd done some review swaps but I like your story the most so far. I'll put your story in my collection, not for the sake of it but because I'm already invested in where the author will take me. Kudos to you and keep up the great work! **: Haven't played Total War yet but because of your story, I might just give it a go :)
The atmosphere is really "chill" or should I say give chills ! War is coming at their door and characters are ready to fight. I like the way they are going on their separate ways. I'll dont spoil here but continue like this; Good work
Awesome read! There's only three chapters so far but the world and the characters are beautifully painted (or war-painted). I'm a sucker for wars on paper, both steel-armed and political. And I can't wait to get to the latter. Also excited on what will become of Cornelius and Commodus. Only reason I didn't give full marks was the shifting tenses. But that can be easily remedied. I'd suggest to pick one and stick to it throughout. It's minor though and only slightly took me away from the fantasy. I hope this comment doesn't come off as harsh criticism but as fellow advice from a fellow author to another. Advice aside, this story was a breath of fresh air. I'd done some review swaps but I like your story the most so far. I'll put your story in my collection, not for the sake of it but because I'm already invested in where the author will take me. Kudos to you and keep up the great work! **: Haven't played Total War yet but because of your story, I might just give it a go :)
The atmosphere is really "chill" or should I say give chills ! War is coming at their door and characters are ready to fight. I like the way they are going on their separate ways. I'll dont spoil here but continue like this; Good work