/ Action / Rinnegan in Boruto
摘要
Thanks for supporting
English is not my first language.so sorry for bad grammar.
Slow paced story
Getting Rinnegan in Boruto.
Same generation as Boruto but both are in different class
標籤
你也許也喜歡
3.47
與他人分享您的想法
寫檢討GooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooD
揭示劇透It’s not just bad grammar but horrible spelling that makes it seem like you’re losing your brain cells reading it. I understand English is not their first language but yhey can at least put in the effort to search up the correct spelling or invest in a dictionary.
This is a wonderful fanfiction in my opinion but there is stuff u need to improve ɎØɄ ₱₳₴₮ 100%!![img=update] yayayayyayayayayayyayauauayayayayayyyayayyyayaaayayyayayaayayayayayayay
揭示劇透Chapter 4 currently: The concept behind this story is good but the execution is subpar at best. The main flaw that the author has is that they rush through things too quickly. Now let’s get to the main points: Writing Quality: Barely readable. As stated earlier, the author rush through things and doesn’t give characters any type of emotions behind their actions. This make it difficult to understand characters and the action they take. Story Development: There’s barely anything i can say here since it’s just the start. Character Design: This is a bad one. Currently, characters have no personality whatsoever. Actions done by them make no sense. Take the “neglected treatment” for example, I doubt that the main cast would allow things to get that far, especially naruto who has been a victim of such thing. World Background: Literally everything revolves around “Root bad, Danzo bad, Mc and his family are treated badly, woe be me” and it’s annoying. Not to mention how flawed the backstory of the ocs are, Root agents are literally brainwashed till they’re blank state. Danzo is not a character that can trust anyone with that type of information or power. And even if somehow the ocs backstory are somehow true, Danzo literally have failsafes on his root soldiers. I doubt he’ll let the father live since he knows so much.
I dont like it and i think its waste of time Amateur and mc like child .q Jdjdjsjsjjdjdjdjdjdjdjdjdjdjddjjdjdjdjdjdjdjdjdjdjdddhhdjdjdhdhdhhdhdudyeysdd
Author, Give the a Redemption Arc, at least make Him neutral good/evil. I read too many Fics with overly Good or Evil Mc. Any ways I read more of your releases hopefully a Mass release. Good luck.
揭示劇透is this dropped??? it is pretty good ....... .. ...............................................................................................................
mc is a naive child with extremely low eq, he is like one of those idiotic emo wannabe villains, I personally didn't like his character ... the grammar was also bad ... But some people might like the mc who knows 🤔
Pretty good but there are a lot of annoying grammar and spelling errors. I recommend grammarly, it’s free
GIVE ME MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRR................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
mc is actually a naive villain, huh. just a few people's fault he hit flat. he wants true friends without pity, but mc's own condition has made people feel sorry for him. mc himself can't understand the feelings of some of his friends, why should his friends know the true feelings of this stupid and naive mc
The grammer is bad but i like the story and his goal. I just hope Mc and Airin will be together forever and they will not betray each other.
作者 Dead_Armor
More please[img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update]