Chương 7: Birth of The Green Devil
As Alister's knowledge of glyphs grew, so did his skill's level. He spent hours with Shizuno, going over the nuances of the language after thoroughly memorizing its alphabet. In the middle of one of their lessons, Pinky called and asked for help at the mall.
Alister decided to tag along since he had nothing better to do, and all of his training lately was literally just moving. She wore some fancy dress while he wore a Hawaiian button-up shirt, shorts, and flip-flops. Usually, he dresses really well but Alistar just didn't have the energy.
"Geh, why is he here? Masaka! You two are a couple and I get Nii-sama all to myself!!!?"
"In your dreams, Ranjo-san," Shizuno said challengingly.
"Can you two measure flaps later? And why are we here again?" Alistar was genuinely confused.
"Oh, I need help picking out a birthday gift for Nii-sama," the other two turn to leave, "Wait wait please I'll buy you food!"
"Fine, we'll help or whatever."
They walked around the mall for seemingly an eternity before they decided to take a break outside. The skies had turned gray, and the girl's faces were rather sour. It might have something to do with Alistar clowning on them about not knowing Moroha at all even though they claimed to like/love him. They made fun of his weird bracelets and anklets with a bunch of obviously demonic symbols.
Alistar didn't usually give a damn what people thought but their comments stung a little bit. So, all three of them are now sitting on a bench near the ocean shore, eating crepes, and not looking at one another. All three of them enjoyed their desserts and the salty but cool breeze washing over them. It was then the weather got worse all of a sudden, and the ocean's wave patters became erratic.
Just as the chaotic environment reached its peak, a giant serpent burst through the water's surface! It took a moment to register the situation, but then everyone started screaming and running like chickens with their heads cut off. Some of the parents even ran, forgetting their children.
"A Metaphysical!?" Pinky shouted.
Pinky and Shizuno sprang into action, the former rushing the reptilian while the former called for backup. Alistar wasn't done with his crepe yet since he was still struggling with fine motor control. As soon as people saw that two Saviors were already on the scene, they almost instantly calmed down. A few even pulled out their phones and started recording.
This was the power of media. Even a snake as enormous as a small skyscraper becomes nothing but a spectacle to be observed.
""CAN WE GET SOME HELP PLEASE!!!"" Pinky and Shizuno yelled at Alistar who just finished the last bite of his dessert.
Still feeling a little petty from their comments, he said, "Nuh-uh."
""FYM NUH-UH!"" They yelled again.
They both ran towards the now-empty shopping mall, trying to lure the thing away from the spectators. Alistar, on the other hand, started pulling what seemed to be sound equipment from his inventory. Giant speakers, a mixer, and an old iPod were laid out in front of him. It took a few minutes for everything to be set up. As he hit play, six more snakes burst from the ocean, all heading toward the mall.
Alistar stored the resistance bands in preparation while shrouding himself in his signiture emerald aura. He began jumping to the beat of the song, Black Betty, as all six heads turned toward him and the spectators. Looking back at all the cameras, he smirked and formed two comically sized war hammers in each hand.
He wanted to play around a bit, so he used [Godspeed] to sprint toward the snakes that he had lured into a clearing.
*SHAAAAAAA*
The first head tried to bite him with its colossal jaws.
*BAM!*
The hammer struck its head right on beat as he got into a rhythm. The other five heads all attacked at once.
Left Right Left Right Left Right Left Right Left Right! Each strike sounded like a cannon but still didn't overpower the music.
He used both hammers in turn, striking the snakes on beat. Teeth, flesh, and blood went flying in a bloody symphony of guitar strums and hammer strikes.
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Alistar began laughing hysterically as he beat the shit out of them as if trying to get candy out of a pinata, or some sadistic game of whack-a-mole.
At some point, a news truck showed up, catching Alistar's hysterical dramatics in 4k.
One of the heads tried to spit some petrifying mist that he just redirected using the force of the hammers, petrifying patches of land and trees. After a visceral strike to one of their heads, it splattered into a metaphorical sea of blood, only fueling Alistars hysterics.
Dropping the hammers, he grabbed the neck of the now deceased head and tore it from the main body some unknown distance away. It was now time for his favorite technique…
Beating a Motherfucker with another MOTHERFUCKER!
One of the heads tried to target the spectators since he was distracted.
"AAAAAAHHHHHHH! HEEEEELP!" Random number 1 screamed.
"I HAVE A CAT!" One of the newscasters squealed.
Just as the snake was about to chomp on them, Alistar appeared with the now severed head in his arms. He swung the shlong as hard as he could.
*SPLAT! SSHHHHHHH*
Doom Eternal: The Only Thing They Fear Is You begins playing.
As the heads made contact, they spontaneously exploded from the force. Blood and guts rain down like a typhoon from hell. As the cameraman with balls of steel panned to Alistar, illusory, devil-like horns were jutting from his forehead. A scythe made of pure mana appeared in his hands as he turned back towards his prey.
[Mongyoku]
Using the gory raindrops of blood as footholds, he rushed the remaining four heads while cackling like a madman in a blur of emerald and crimson. His giant scythe rends their flesh and bones asunder.
Only one head remained. He stared it down with gleeful insanity. Time seemed to slow as the scythe came barreling towards it. The lone snake head looked at its fallen brethren and accepted the blow with grace. Its head slid from its torso with no resistance.
At the mall, six more heads were still rampaging, however, Alistar didn't move, he didn't have to.
"Yin-Yang Kurikara!" Moroha's voice reverberated throughout the surroundings.
*BOOOOOOOM!*
An explosion rocks the surroundings, spreading all manner of gore, and showering the spectators with blood yet again. They really can't catch a break, can they?
And so two S-rank Saviors were born.
(AN: In the anime, it's hidden that these creatures exist but that's rather boring, so I'm doing this instead.)
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