The hallway of the hotel was brightly lit. Nothing could escape from someone's eyes as every inch of it was illuminated by the exquisite lamps hanging on the ceiling and the walls.
Ding!
The elevator had arrived yet, neither Himari nor Kazuya entered. In the end, the doors of the elevator closed again.
Three people, one woman and two men remained standing in front of the elevators. All of them carried different expressions on their countenances.
Himari stared at Jun. The five years of being with him before made her understood the look in his reddened eyes right now.
Her heart might no longer contain the feelings she had for him but, the memories remained no matter how faint they were.
Besides...
There was one hidden thing that forbade her to accept him back.
If only he knew what happened after he went abroad.
About what his mother had done to her.
She kept it away from everyone. Not even her mother or Nanako knew about it.
If she revealed it...
Her heart would be torn to pieces.
Himari drew a long breath. With an unwavering gaze, she stared at the man with who she used to pour all of her love.
"Jun, I know you are a reasonable guy. When I said it's over between us, it is really over. There would be no possibility of rekindling our relationship whatsoever."
Some said, even though we felt nothing for the ones we used to love, it might be because the feelings were suppressed deep within our hearts.
If we did something or anything that would lit up the spark once again, we might be swallowed whole in its flame.
And, when the burning passion failed again, the consequences would be extremely dire.
It might totally kill you inside.
"No! If it's really over, why do you remain alone all this time?" Jun burst out in frustration. The calmness that he always showed to other people crumbled in an instant, "You're waiting for me, isn't it? I don't believe that you have anything with this man!"
His eyes were as sharps as daggers once they were directed to the man beside Himari.
Kazuya stared back at him with an equally piercing gaze.
Why couldn't he respect Himari's decision to not have anything to do with him again?
Wasn't he supposed to be a bright man?
Indeed, humans tended to act far from how they used to if they couldn't handle their emotions well.
Kazuya's eyes fell on the young lady next to him. He was amused to see how straight her back was, how unfaltering she appeared in front of the man who she used to love.
Himari's brows slightly furrowed at the face of Jun's pleading.
"You shouldn't dictate or assume over the choices of someone's life. Whether I have someone with me or not, it's up to me. My life has no longer revolving around you."
Letting go was hard.
The fond memories of them together always resonated in her mind in the early days of their separation.
Yet, the pain gradually lessened.
Himari didn't know if it was because she had completely moved on or the reason was that she had been numbed by the pain.
Jun shook his head. His expression twisted as countless emotions were surging in his heart, broke through the layer of defense with him. Veins popped on the back of his hands as he gripped his fists tight.
How could he really accept her reasons?
Seeing that it would waste more of her time, Himari turned around. With a glance at Kazuya, she said softly, "Let's go."
Kazuya faintly nodded. He followed the lady's small steps. Himari had already pushed the button of the elevator.
Jun was exasperated. The moment he saw Himari turning her back to him, something snapped in his mind.
"Himari!"
He reached out a hand to grab her wrist but with a sudden smack, his hand was pushed to the other side.
Jun's eyes widened. He stared at the man who suddenly slapped his hand hard. The quick smack almost numbed his had.
To the man who was stubborn, Kazuya gave him a smirk, "You should be a gentleman, aren't you? When a lady says no, it's a no. You should know that it's bad to force your feelings on someone who has moved on."
The words struck Jun hard. He darted his eyes to the man and to Himari who didn't even spare a look back at him.
Ding!
Once again, the doors slid open.
Kazuya smiled again but his eyes were cold.
"Learn to respect someone's decision, okay?"
With that, he turned around and entered the elevator. Himari had already stepped inside. She kept her gaze straight in front of her yet, it never fell on Jun again.
Before the doors slid close, Jun was desperately looking at her. But, he only met with a cold expression on her face.
Thud.
The doors were closed.
Inside the elevator, both Himari and Kazuya were quiet.
Himari threw her gaze out to her side of the elevator, seeing at her reflection on the shiny surface of the panels. Her eyes no longer carried the same resolve she had when she faced Jun earlier. She pursed her lips hard, trying to keep the turmoils of her heart in check.
Ding!
They finally arrived at the lobby.
Once the doors were opened, the symphony played inside the lobby greeted them. People were still walking back and forth in the huge lobby, either with friends or lovers or businessmen who had just arrived with their suitcases.
Kazuya extended a hand, asking Himari to step out first. She gave him a faint smile.
They walked out of the hotel. Himari just followed the man's lead. After walking down the side road for a bit, they arrived at the parking spot of Kazuya's car.
Neither of them talked until they left the hotel. Himari's eyes fell on the side mirror. The image of the hotel got farther and farther away as the car entered the main road.
The neon lights of the buildings and lamp poles in their surroundings fell in the inside of the car, lightly illuminating their expressions. Soft music slowly transversed in the spaces between them.
Kazuya steadily and carefully maneuvered the car on the road.
"Are you sad? Meeting him like that?"
His voice broke the silence between them. Kazuya's questions drew Himari back from her complicated thoughts.
"Rather than sad, I'm kind of disappointed," Himari was being truthful as she answered him.
Kazuya lifted up his gaze to the rear mirror, looking at Himari who was now frowning with her eyes lowered. In a second, his eyes were back on the road ahead of him.
"Why? Do you actually want to return to him but the consequences pull you back?"
His straightforward question incited a faint laugh from Himari. Kazuya was confused to see her laughing.
"What's wrong?"
Was there something wrong with his questions?
Himari laughed again. Her laughter was crisp, like the sound of the wind chime.
"How could you directly ask me that? People don't usually ask that kind of questions so straightforwardly as you did."
Her eyes curved into crescents as she continued laughing.
"...Sorry."
Kazuya silently cursed himself. He himself didn't understand why did he be so forthright when asking her about that man.
"I'm sorry, really," He repeated his apology with his eyes downcast.
Himari's laughter gradually died down. She looked at him with a hint of teasing in her eyes.
"I've always thought you're a considerate and thoughtful guy but, it seems like my impression of you should be re-evaluated?"
"No, I am a considerate and thoughtful guy. Just keep my good image in your mind. Please excuse my blunder earlier."
Once again her laughter filled the car.
Kazuya could really be shameless in viewing his own good qualities.
Well, Chiharu had really learned well from him.
"Ah, that's a good laugh," Himari's lips curled into a smile. Turning her head to the man next to him, her smile softened, "About your questions, I really have no intention to go back to him."
Her stance on that matter was firm. It wouldn't be easy to persuade her to break her resolve.
Kazuya glanced at her for a second, "Then, why did you say you feel disappointed?"
The speed of the car was slowed down as it entered an intersection.
Himari's smile drooped. She moved her gaze from the man to the outside of the car.
They had arrived at the street of 'Sakura Under the Lights'.
From afar, Himari could see countless people walking down the streets. Bubbly laughter of theirs got carried away by the gentle night breeze, slowly dispersing in the air.
"I don't really know how should I say it but, seeing how he acted earlier makes me disappointed," Himari bit her lower lip.
Kazuya turned off the engine. He properly leaned his back on the seat, hummed inaudibly then looked back at her.
Seeing that she didn't continue beyond that, he tapped one hand on the dashboard.
"Let's go out. The night is breezy. It might help to cool you down," said Kazuya gently. He treated the last question he asked her as it never happened.
Himari hooked up the corners of her lips. She nodded, "En."
The two got out of the car.
The very moment Himari emerged out from the car, a cool breeze blew past her, lightly twirling the soft fabric of her dress.
The lights hanging over the cherry blossom trees twinkled brightly in the night, sending rays of light in the darkness to people who yearn for it.
There would be some darker parts of the story, both involving Himari and Kazuya. As to what are they, let's find out later ;)
Well, if this book is about a couple who gets back together, Kazuya would be the pitiful Second ML who couldn't get the MC but...
Hehe, what do you think?
The two of them left the parking area. Slowly, as their feet brought them to the street that was filled with lights, little by little the merriment of the area lifting up their moods.
Aside from the visitors who were either talking to their friends and partners or even taking photos to commemorate their time there, there were also booth vendors who set up small stalls at the roadside. Music blasted in the air, passing down the street.
The vendors were selling handcrafted items, spring clothes, toys and even food. The acceptance of the visitors toward the stalls was great as they kept stopping from one stall to the next.
Both of them continued walking yet no one said a thing.
Himari silently looked at Kazuya beside her.
He kept pressing his lips together. His brows almost knitted together from time to time. Both of his hands were put inside his pockets, the moving bulges appeared as if he was clenching and unclenching his fists.
All of his little actions showed that he was having something troubling him right now.
"Kazuya, didn't you say you want to talk to me about something?" Himari took the first step to disperse the silence between them, "What it is? You look restless."
The lady's words brought him back to reality. Kazuya paused his steps, lowering his gaze to her yet he still said nothing.
Himari stopped walking too. She patiently waited for him to speak.
"I do have something to talk to you about," Kazuya opened his mouth after a long expanse of silence, "It's just... I do not know how to say it."
"It is about Chiharu and Izumi?" Himari made a guess.
Kazuya lightly shook his head. He exhaled a long sigh. Darting his eyes left and right, his gaze finally fell on a place.
With one hand pointed to the direction, he said, "Why don't we sit down first?"
There was an empty bench placed under a lamp pole, a bit far from the twinkling cherry blossom trees.
Himari just agreed with him. The man and the woman walked again.
They sat on the bench. Once again, Kazuya appeared listless. Even so, at this time, Himari didn't push him with more questions. She just let him took his time.
She couldn't help but wonder, what made this man who had always look carefree and confident to be at a loss of words?
As Himari was thinking with her eyes drifted from one place to the next, they settled on one of the booths located on the other side of the street.
"Kazuya, wait here for a moment."
Himari stood up, threw the words to him and ran to the booth before Kazuya could say anything. He ended up watching her stopping at the booth that was selling beverages.
Was she thirsty?
Unknown to what Kazuya was thinking, Himari queued at the booth. There were two more people in front of her. After some time, it was finally her turn.
"Please give me two cups of cherry blossom tea," She made her order.
Soon, the seller placed two small spoons of pickled cherry blossom petals inside two paper cups each. He brewed the tea, letting the floating petals spread out in the hot water before he covered the cups with the lids.
Himari quickly paid for the tea, thanked the seller and rushed back to Kazuya.
Kazuya was stunned when he saw the lady ran to him with both her long hair and her dress billowed out around her.
Himari reached out a hand, lightly shaking the cup in her hand, "For you, cherry blossom tea. Ah, if you do not favor the salty taste, the seller gave me a spoon to remove the pickled petals."
Her words made him smiled.
"I don't mind. Thank you."
The cup got transferred from her hand to his. One of his fingers brushed her pinkie, discerning the softness of her skin.
Himari sat down next to him. Both of them savored the tea. The warmth of the cups seeped into their hands, warming them in the cool spring night.
Drinking this tea reminded Himari of her mother. Her mother always pickled cherry blossom petals once the flowers bloomed in spring. She couldn't wait to go home tomorrow.
"Himari, I actually want to ask you about something personal."
After drinking half a cup of cherry blossom tea, Kazuya finally let the words came out of his mouth.
He shouldn't delay it any longer. It would just make him anxious as well as confusing her.
"Something personal?" Himari raised her brows. With both hands holding the cup, she moved her chin toward him to see his side profile, "What it is?"
Never did she expect Kazuya would ask questions about something personal from her.
What was wrong?
"Before, you said that you broke up with that man at the hotel three years ago. I wonder if something else happened on that night, inside the same hotel?"
The man's words baffled Himari.
Why did Kazuya suddenly mention it?
It was true that she herself told him about her breaking up with Jun in the hotel, but, why did he extend his question to what else she experienced there?
Did she ever mention something else when she told him about it during their picnic last week?
Yet, his question made her mind inevitably recalled that night.
That sad yet strange night.
Himari retracted her gaze from Kazuya, lowering her eyes to the paper cup that was held firmly in between her palms.
"That night, I stayed at the hotel. Nanako told me it's better to nurse my broken heart in a five-star hotel room instead of returning to my small apartment. So, I did."
If not because of Nanako's encouragement and the voucher that she specially gave to her, Himari would really return home.
Her real intention was to soothe herself in the hotel room.
But, something else happened.
Himari suddenly broke into a laugh.
Kazuya lifted up his brows, feeling weird when she laughed.
How could she laugh?
Wasn't that night made her sad and afraid?
Or, did she really not remember it?
Soon, her words dispelled his worries.
"Hehe, do you know, I encountered a strange event on that night," Himari's lips curled up. She looked up, turned toward him and continued.
Her voice was soft, sounded carefree, "Someone barged into my room. I knew it's dangerous but, I was really panicked at that time to think about what I should do. In the end, I just let him stay. Ah! But, nothing happened between us! Really!"
Himari quickly added the last sentence, afraid Kazuya would misunderstand.
She rarely recalled that night but, once she did, she would laugh by herself.
"Weren't you really scared about that man? How could you just let him be?" Kazuya lowered his voice.
Himari tilted her head, thinking back of that uncanny night.
"Well, I think he was drugged, intoxicated. He spent most time inside the bathroom. When he finally came out, his whole body was wet with cold water all over. He asked if I could let him hide inside the room so, I did. He has even apologized to me for causing a disturbance."
Kazuya was in a complicated mood.
This girl! How could she let a stranger stay inside a hotel room with her? Didn't she has any sense of danger?
Well, even though she had actually helped him by hiding him, but, Kazuya was still distressed.
He wanted to erupt in frustration but, he held himself back.
The scene of her crying in her sleep slowly floated in his mind before the image gradually became clearer.
At that time, did it happen because her feelings were in disarray due to the breakup? After all, it was the man that she loved for years before she initiated the separation.
How could she not feel sad?
No matter which party brought up the breakup in the first place, it was still a sad thing.
Kazuya pursed his lips, thinking of his resolve to admit that man was him.
He wanted to be truthful but, he was afraid she would feel scared of him later.
Yet, he couldn't be peaceful as long as he didn't admit to it.
That was why he strengthen his heart and asked her out for a meeting.
The longer he delayed the matter, the more he would feel guilty whenever he saw her smiling and laughing beside him.
"That man... Have you ever thought who is him?" Kazuya's voice got a little lower than before. He tightly held the paper cup, almost crumpling it.
Himari didn't immediately answer his question. She pondered in silence before letting out a soft 'En."
"He left me his business card and a note, saying that I should reach out to him if I ever needed his help," admitted Himari.
"...Did you throw those out?" Kazuya was startled at the mention of the name card and the note.
Himari shook her head, "I didn't throw them out. I remember I put them inside a book but, I couldn't remember which one. En, is it my old planner or a random novel?"
While Himari was thinking, Kazuya didn't know either to laugh or cry.
He had always thought that she had tossed the card and note inside a dustbin as early as three years ago.
"Then, why haven't you contacted him? It is because you're not in trouble?" Kazuya cautiously asked another question.
But, instead of having an answer, Himari stared at him with confusion written all over her face.
Her eyes right now appeared as if she was contemplating what was wrong with him.
Kazuya gulped, "...Himari?"
Did he has exposed himself before admitting to her first?
Well, well, well, how would our girl react? Hehe ;)
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