The Nest
POOF
"Al you magnificent summoner! That was the best thing I've done all year!"
"Good." Bastard deserves much worse than that. "I wish I could have seen his face."
"You have no idea how mortified he was! Oh man that was pure gold! I'd sell a leg to do that again! What was in his letter?"
"Danzo wanted me to kill Sasuke and give his eyes to him."
"So you drew that? Oh man that is the best thing ever!"
"If you're up for it, can you run this letter to Tsunade?" I hold out another letter. "One less graphic this time."
"Sure thing! Oh man I still can't get over that!" Shirokumo wipes a fake tear out of his seventh eye. "I'll be right back."
"Wait se-"
POOF
"-nd me back first! Dammit now I'm stuck here!"
"Summoner?"
"Oh hey Murasakino." I turn to where her voice came from. "...And the rest of the weavers."
"Do you need any more clothes?" One of them eagerly asks.
"Uh... no?"
The Hokage's Office
POOF
"Tsunade!" Shirokumo happily calls out.
"Drinking buddy!" Tsunade's face lights up. She reaches into a desk drawer and pulls out two glasses that she fills with sake.
"Wonderful job on Al's upbringing! Simply magnificent! I'm so glad he's my summoner!"
"What did he do this time?" She takes a drink. "Heaven forbid he burned down a forest. I know it's only a matter of time, that kid is a pyromaniac. Have you seen some of the things he does with fire?"
"Oh no it's even better than that! Here, read first. I'll explain after, it'll make a lot more sense."
Lady with the Hat,
Danzo has the office under surveillance somehow. Fix it. I don't care how, but I don't need anymore surprise letters from Konoha's underworld ringleader telling me exactly who I am, where I am and what I'm doing! Fix it now or I'll come back to Konoha and fix it myself!
Spider
"I knew it. I knew Danzo was spying on me, I just couldn't prove it. Hear that bastard! I know you're listening in!" She shouts towards the ceiling. Tsunade finishes her glass and pours another. "Round 2?"
"Hell yeah!" She tops off Shirokumo's glass too. "You're not going to believe this: The idiot wanted him to kill Sasuke."
"I bet that went over well." Sarcasm is dripping off her voice.
"You have no idea! His reply was the best thing ever!"
"What did he do?"
Outside of the Hokage's Office
"Okay, this should be the last of the paperwork for today." Shizune mutters to herself. "I just need to keep her away from the sake for another few hours, that should be easy!"
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!" Tsunade's boisterous laugh echos down the hallway.
"Great." Shizune groans. "She's finally lost it. Well, I suppose this stack can wait until tomorrow."
"He actually did that?" Tsunade asks between laughs.
"Yes! It was priceless!" Shirokumo happily swigs down his drink. "Best letter I've ever ran!"
"Squirt, you're one hell of a person." She sighs contentedly. "Thanks for the update Shirokumo, but I should probably get this taken care of. Who knows what else he's found out."
"Of course. See ya next time!"
POOF
"Too bad I can't charge him with spying on me. Then I'd have to reveal how I knew he was and that would blow Alvarcus's cover. You never make things easy for me Squirt."
The Nest
POOF
"Sup Al?"
"GET ME OUT OF HERE!" I scream the moment I see Shirokumo again.
"But we've only made ten new outfits for you!" Murasakino says as she hold up a piece of purple fabric next to me. "Shame, purple is such a lovely color but it just isn't for you."
"Shirokumo! Now please!"
"Haha! Talk about an exciting day. Sure, I'll send you home now." He raises his front two legs and brings them together. "Actually..."
"Don't you dare." I threaten him.
"Why don't you pack up his new clothes first?" He cheekily grins at me. "Wouldn't want all that hard work to go to waste."
"Wonderful idea! Ladies, lets get to it!" Murasakino and the rest of the weavers scamper around and are folding and placing my clothes into a large sack.
"You suck. I just want to go back! Is that asking too much!"
"All done!" Murasakino happily says. "Here you go Alvarcus."
"Oof! Why is this so heavy?" Exactly how much did they make for me?
"Alright, bye Al." Shirokumo brings his legs together.
"Wait I don't have a good -"
POOF
At the Hotel
POOF
" - grip! Ah crap!" I keel over under the weight of my sack of clothes. "Don't fall, don't fall, don't fall crap I'm falling."
THUD
Clothes spill everywhere. Dammit Shirokumo you really suck. How could you do this to me?
"Smooth. You coast straight through the Exams but here you are, defeated by a sack of clothing." Sasuke is making fun of me. Jerk.
"Are those from the Spiders?" Tayuya asks. Uh oh.
"Uh... yes?" I squeak out.
"Gimmie!" With a mad gleam in here eyes she lunges at the half filled sack.
"All yours!" I sidestep the airborne Tayuya.
"... Is this normal for her?" Sasuke asks in mild amusement.
"Yes. Yes it is." I groan out.
"I made a ridiculous amount of money and I get all these clothes too! Best! Day! EVER!"
The Next Morning, Outside of our Hotel
Tayuya jumps onto my back. "Onward trusty steed! To Otogakure!" She's heavier than I remember.
"Tayuya, either I can carry you or I can carry the clothes. Pick one, I'm not doing both." I lay down the law.
"Red carry the clothes." She orders.
"No. Do it yourself." Sasuke is having none of this.
"I'm your superior!"
"Don't care, they aren't my clothes."
"Fine. We'll stop and buy a storage scroll. I'm not leaving these clothes behind."
"Where are we going to find a shop that will sell us a storage scroll?" I ask.
Sasuke and Tayuya both stare at me.
"Oh. Right. Spymaster in the making here. Summoning Jutsu!"
POOF
"Sup Green?"
"Hey Shirokumo. Can you tell us where we can buy a storage scroll? We have no idea."
"... This is for the clothes isn't it?"
"Yes. I'm still mad about that."
"Right this way!" He scampers off down the street.
We make quite an interesting scene. There's Sasuke, an elegant pretty boy wearing a vibrant crimson mask. Then me, a mysterious person with literally every part of my body hidden by clothing. Then Tayuya, a cackling crazy lady hauling a sack of something. And to top it all off, we're following a pure white spider the size of a puppy. This has to be one of the strangest things ever.
"Here we are. This place should have a scroll or two." Shirokumo poofs back to the Nest.
"Well then, let's get it and leave. I want to go back to Sound." I enter the store with Sasuke and Tayuya right behind me. "Have fun finding that storage scroll Tayuya, I'm going to explore."
We're in a weapons store, there's kunai, swords, shuriken, and pretty much every kind of weapon imaginable. Some of these are pretty cool, but none of them are really my style. I suppose the kunai are okay, but I already have my own and I can get them for free back in Sound. Perks of being Orochimaru's student.
"Green! I got it! Let's go!" Tayuya's voice echos throughout the store.
I make my way to the exit. "About time. Can we go back now?"
"Yes, let's go!"
On the Way Back to Sound
"Still can't believe I'm carrying you." I mutter more to myself than Tayuya.
"You know you like it." She leans in to whisper in my ear. "I know exactly where your hands are. Give it a squeeze if you want, I don't mind." She wiggles her very nicely toned posterior suggestively.
Well... she did give me permission. I might as well indulge a little.
~Host, something is wrong.~
"Hold that thought Tayuya. Jiongu, what's wrong?"
"Oh gross, it talks?" Tayuya says to herself.
~I'm sensing something, a large amount of various affinities but they're all in one spot. They're too close to be shinobi, it's something else.~
"How many?"
~Over one hundred.~
What the hell could that be? "How fast and what direction is it moving?"
~Quickly, even by shinobi standards. It's heading right for us.~
"Sasuke! High gear now!" We both take off at our maximum speed.
"Alvarcus what's wrong?" He asks.
"I don't know. The Jiongu picked up on over a hundred various affinities following us at high speeds. They're too condensed to be individuals, it's like they're stacked on top of each other. I don't know what is following us but it can't be good."
~It's gaining on us!~
"Sasuke can you go any faster?"
"Not if you want me to keep this speed all the way to Sound." His breath is labored already. Shit. We're barely a quarter of the way there.
"Top speed as long as you can. It's our only chance. I'll carry you too if I have to." We up our speed again.
~Our speeds are matched. It isn't gaining but we're not getting any further away.~
"Okay." I can work with that. "At this speed we're matched, all we have to do is slow it down and we should be able to get away."
"How do you plan to do that?" Tayuya asks.
"Honestly I have no idea. I could leave behind a monster to attack it, but that's not something I really want to do. I'm open to suggestions."
"Spider clones." Sasuke quickly says between heavy breaths. I don't know how much longer he can keep this pace.
"Good idea. Summoning Jutsu: Spider Clones!" Ten clones pop into existence and instantly sprint towards the anomaly. "That's a start. We'll see how long they delay it for. Really wish I knew how to make a shadow clone. Then I could at least know what happened."
The next minute passes in a tense silence.
"The clones should have been there by now." I say. "Jiongu, update? Has it slowed?"
~For maybe twenty seconds. It caught back up instantly, it's keeping the same distance from us. It could have caught us by now. It's waiting for something.~
"Aw fuck."I know what it's doing.
"What?" Tayuya asks. "What's going on?"
"It's matching our pace. It isn't trying to catch up to us, it's following us. We can't lead it back to Sound."
"No, we can't." Tayuya agrees. "Ideas?"
"Yeah, it's a really bad one. But it's also our best shot of everyone getting out alive. Neither of you are going to like it and I really hate it."
"Let's hear it." She urges. "A bad plan is better than no plan."
Not really sure if that statement is true, but I don't have time to ponder it. "It's rather simple. I'm the best suited to run away from it, so I'll stop running and stall it while you two get to Sound. Once you both get there, get reinforcements. Hell get Orochimaru, I bet he's the only one who can stand up to this."
"I don't like it." Tayuya says.
"No." That's all Sasuke can manage right now.
"Do either of you have better ideas? I'm the one with overwhelming jutsu, I'm the one with limitless stamina, I'm the one that can take a ridiculous beating and still walk away, I'm the one with five lives. Hell there's one hundred other affinities there, I can grab spare hearts if I have to. Come on, I'm perfect for this. The bigger the numbers I go against, the more lives I can have."
"... You're right. I still don't like it." Tayuya grumbles.
"You don't have to like it, I hate it and I'm the one doing it."
"You better" gasp "come back." Sasuke huffs out between huge breaths. "If you don't" gasp "I'm killing you."
"Deal." I toss Tayuya in the air and she gracefully lands next to Sasuke. "Do hurry, I don't know how long I'll last."
"We will." Tayuya says as both she and Sasuke sprint towards my salvation.
"Alright. This is going to suck. How long till it's here?"
~Minutes.~
"Well, if I'm going out, I'm going out with style." Using earth jutsu I mold two thrones on either side of a rocky table. I make two stone cups and fill them with a small water jutsu. "I've always wanted a throne."
"And now for some traps." I pull out all but two of my kunai and attach strings to various trees around the clearing and push the other end into the kunai themselves. Each one flies into a different spot. I've upped the number of kunai traps I can keep at once, I can maintain around fifteen now. I'm getting really good at multitasking and fifteen different kunai should give me a good angle no matter what.
"Final touch." I shrug off my coat and lift my shirt. My earth and wind monsters leap out of me and disappear high into the treeline. Better to have some mobile jutsu cannons just in case. I still have three hearts, I can always pull the other two back if I have to. Or just take it from one of the possible one hundred shinobi that should be here any moment.
I nervously wait the next few minutes in my impromptu throne. This is a terrible idea. Why did I do this?I shouldhave just kept going to back to Sound. I'm sure Orochimaru would have defenses in place for something like this.
~Host, it's here.~
"My my, how amusing." A gruff voice says as it's form lands in front of me. It's hunkered over on all fours. It's hair has the weirdest style ever and a bandanna is covering its mouth. "I never thought you would be so bold."
It's wearing a black coat with red clouds. I know who this is.
"Sasori, never expected to see you of all people." I calmly say to him. This explains so much, the Jiongu is sensing all of his puppets that he has sealed away. That's why it felt like hundreds of people, because in a way it is. This totally ruins all of my plans. Even if I had a week to set up the battlefield to my advantage I still wouldn't be ready to face an opponent of this level.
He tilts his head in mild surprise. "You know me? It isn't often I get recognized in this puppet. It's one of my more popular creations, quite a few others use it."
"Of course I do." I wave at the throne opposite me. "Care to join me? If I knew it was you I would have made the chair more accommodating for Hiruko."
"Why should I?" He asks.
"Come, let us talk. We may be able to settle this with words instead of fists. I may not be able to kill you but I can probably trash the puppet you're in. Wouldn't it suck to have to repair that?"That and now talking is probably my best hope to get out of here unscathed. Or alive. I'd settle for alive.
"You're one weird kid." He hobbles over to his throne. "I can honestly say I've never had something like this happen to me before."
"I can honestly say that if we fought I'd lose. So I figured I might as well try to talk things out first before I tried running for my life again. I'm assuming you were following me for a purpose?"
"Not you specifically." He takes a water cup. "Either of you Oto shinobi from the exams would do."
"Hm." Does he not know who Sasuke and I are? I thought he was Akatsuki's spymaster, surely he should have figured out my identity. "You have one at your disposal. What do you plan to do next?"
"Get eyes and ears on Orochimaru. I will have my revenge, but I won't go in blindly. I want his defeat to be assured." He informs me in his gravely voice."You're one of his new pupils. Who better to spy on the man than those he's constantly around?"
"Sorry, but I'm not up for switching teams." I take a drink of my own water. Surprisingly my hands aren't shaking.
"You misunderstand, you don't have a choice. I'm going to make you into one of my puppets. You'll do it whether you choose to or not."
"See, now that is what I was afraid of. I already have one voice in my head, I don't need another."
"Like I said before, you don't have a choice." He sets his water cup down.
"Is there anything I can do to make you not do that?" I ask. I really don't want to fight him. Right now he'd win against me, the best I can hope for is stalling till Orochimaru comes and saves me. Kami that is a depressing thought.
"I suppose you could actually run away, if you do somehow manage to escape me then I won't be able to impose my will on you."He comments offhandedly.
"Interesting. How about if I told you Kisame wants me as a pet? Would you not mess with my head then?"
"Sorry what?" He asks in confusion.
"Kisame Hoshigaki, big blue sharkman, missing nin of Kiri, has the world's most broken sword ever, and is partners with Itachi Uchiha? They're both a part of your group, you're wearing the same coats. Seriously, you'd think you would know each other."
"I know who he is! How do you know him?" Sasori demands. He is suddenly on guard, the casual air he had about him is gone.
I pull down my hood, I take off my mask and I unwind my scarf from around my neck. "Maybe he mentioned me? He did cut my head off after all."
"Oh, you're the mini Kakuzu. You're Muffins." He groans out. "Dammit. It just had to be you didn't it? We're done here."
"Did you just call me Muffins?" It's my turn to be confused.
"That's what Kisame calls you. No idea why."
My jaw drops. "I'm... going to forget the last thirty seconds." I vigorously shake my head. "What happened to the whole 'I will impose my will on you' thing?"
"I can't do it to you. The Jiongu and that technique don't work together." He starts walking away. "Just my luck, out of all Sound shinobi to get it's the only one I can't kill. Perfect. Since when did he go to Sound anyways? I thought he was a Konoha shinobi."
"Wait what? What do you mean you can't kill me? Surely it would be easy for you. Well, maybe. I'm not going to just roll over and take it." I don't understand this at all, even if he can't make me into his spy he's going to let me live? That's poor form and he knows it.
"Kisame and Kakuzu have both taken an interest in you. Kisame because, well you were right, he wants you as a pet. Muffins. What a terrible name. And Kakuzu because he finds you mildly amusing, you're mimicking him very well. He hasn't admitted it but I think he wants to meet you."
"Well you know what they say, mimicry is the greatest form of flattery." I never thought I would be on relatively good terms with members of the Akatsuki. "So that's it? We're going to part ways because your co-workers find me mildly amusing? No grand battle, no ridiculous puppets, no nothing?"
"It isn't just them that finds you amusing, I myself find you very interesting. You show traits of multiple bloodlines and kinjutsu, yet no one has been able to confirm anything. Magnet release, the ability to fly, the Jiongu, Kisame even thinks you have traits of the storm release. I believe him too, it's the only thing we could think of for your elemental sphere defense. I want to see more of you, and once I've seen it all I plan on adding you to my collection. I may not be able to influence your mind, but I can surely use your corpse to my hearts content! A puppet that diverse, that unique! I'll make it last through the ages!"
Huh. Storm release, that's a new one. I guess if I squint from a distance it kind of fits. "Well... thanks for the compliment? It isn't everyday I'm told I'll be added to a collection of immortal puppets."
"You're welcome." Sasori leaves me alone on my throne.
"I... don't know how to react to that. What's worse, being told that Sasori wants to add me to his puppet army or Muffins?"
~Muffins. Definitely Muffins.~
"Which way is he going?"
~Away from our comrades, back towards Kusa.~
"Well... alright then. This was very strange."
The Entrance to Sound's Base
"Orochimaru we have to hurry! Alvarcus could be getting killed right now!" Sasuke's voice echoes out of the tunnel.
"I am well aware of that. From what you described it is better to be prepared. Even I could have a challenge against this many opponents."
"Come on! Get ready on the way, he could be halfway dead by now!"
Orochimaru steps out of the tunnel. We make eye contact. I cheerfully wave at him. Orochimaru rolls his eyes. "Sasuke, something tells me he's fine."
"I don't care! I want to see him with my own eyes before I deem him fine!" Sasuke roars.
"Hey Sasuke. How's things?" I call out to him.
He explodes out of the tunnel. "Alvarcus! You're alive! How? Did you kill them? Did you run away? How many hearts did you lose?" He's instantly by my side and he's poking and prodding me all over.
"Whoa, calm down. All we did was talk and somehow he decided to walk away. Honestly I'm still confused about that part."
"So you didn't fight?" He asks.
"Nope, it was really weird. We chatted for a bit, I took off my mask, hood and scarf and then he said something about the Jiongu and his techniques not mixing and walked away."
"I expect a detailed report by the end of the day." Orochimaru demands. "Now that we know you're safe, I was in the middle of an experiment. I'm seeing how natural chakra reacts inside deformed or broken chakra systems. So far all I've discovered is a new way to make stones. It's fascinating!" He eagerly walks back inside. "You two can observe if you want. I could use fresh eyes, maybe you'll catch something I didn't."
He wants us to watch him turn people into stone? How fucked up is that? This is the guy I was hoping would rescue me? I must be insane. "No thanks, I'd rather sleep or something. I did just walk away from my fourth S-ranked missing nin."
Orochimaru stills. "I thought it was a group that attacked you? Who was it?"
"Sasori of the Red Sands, I recognized him on sight. I read up on all the S-rank threats out there after Kisame cut my head off. I want to know when I'm outclassed by an opponent."
"We will have a verbal debrief in one hour in my office." Orochimaru vanishes into the tunnel.
Uh-oh, did I say something wrong? Before I mentioned him by name it was just a report but now it's a verbal debrief? Kami this is going to suck.
"Alright, I'm going to at least get out of these bandages. I don't particularly like being a mummy if I don't have to."
One Hour Later, Orochimaru's Office
I'm sitting awkwardly across from my temporary Kage. He's staring deep into my eyes, like he's searching for something out of place. I really don't like this. Something feels off, he's too tense for a debrief. He's ready to attack at a moments notice, even during training he's not this wound up.
"Kabuto, do it." Orochimaru barks out.
Cold hands grasp either side of my head. I feel a foreign chakra surge into my system the second they make contact. It's rifling through my mind, looking for something.
"~GET OUT OF OUR HEAD!~" The Jiongu and I roar in unison.
The Jiongu surges out of my neck scar and lunges at the hands on my temples. I burst out of my chair and whirl towards Kabuto. He's already on the other side of the office. That's not going to stop me, he invaded my mind. I can't let that happen.
"Alvarcus stop!" Orochimaru orders.
"Die! Elemental Strings!" I extend all ten of my elemental whips at him, there's two of every element. He has no hope to dodge, not in these confined quarters. The back half of the office is being torn, beaten, cut, zapped and burned all at the same time. It's magnificent.
"Kabuto flee!" Orochimaru demands.
"As you command." Kabuto says. There's that feeling again. His voice makes me go on edge, but I don't know why!
"NO! He's dying today! No one invades my mind like that!" My whips continue to rage across the office. They'll hit him in a matter of moments.
Victory was snatched out of my grasp by Orochimaru. How, you ask? Simple, he picked me up by the throat and threw me into a wall so hard cracks formed like my spider's webs. That will stop just about anything.
"Alvarcus you will calm down. Now." Orochimaru is deadly serious.
"You should have let me kill him. He was fucking with my head!" I roar into his face.
"I know, I told him too." Orochimaru calmly tells me.
"You have two minutes to explain or I start attacking you next." I force out through clenched teeth as I smoothly slide into a battle ready stance.
"You know I'd win." Orochimaru gloats. But there's something else lurking in him just beneath the surface. He's furious, but it isn't with me. If it was me who made him this angered I'd be fighting for my life already."You can't beat me."
"At this point I don't give a shit! No one fucks with my mind!" No one here at least. I make a special exception for friends if they do it on accident, I'm looking at you Ino. You've done it twice!
"I had to make sure Sasori didn't turn you into one of his spies." Orochimaru calmly explains. Honestly I'm surprised he's still calm, I thought he would have lashed out at my blatant disrespect. "That was the only way to be 100% sure you weren't influenced by him."
"That's why you've been on edge since I've been back." I accuse him.
"Yes. I didn't want to lose one of my most promising shinobi. Especially to Sasori."
I snort. "You don't value me. You don't value anyone, we're all disposable in your eyes."
"That's were you're wrong. You're turning into one of my greatest assets. You can easily stand on par with any member of the Sound Four, I'd even wager that you could best all of them at once. You're nearing Kimimaro's skill level and its been how long since you came to me? Five months?"
That means I have just over two and a half years to get out of here with Sasuke. Has it really been five months already?
"Yeah well torture is one hell of a motivator."
"Careful. I will only tolerate so much sass, even from you." Orochimaru finally warns me.
"Whatever. Can I go sleep in my own bed now?"
"Yes. Do not attack Kabuto again, he is useful to me. For now." Orochimaru orders me with a suspicious narrowing of his eyes.
"Fine." I growl out. "If he ever becomes a problem will you let me deal with it? I don't know why but he rubs me the wrong way." Sometimes even more than you do.
Orochimaru raises a skeptical eyebrow. "Interesting."
I walk out of his now trashed office. I'm not sorry about that at all. With my head held high I go back to my room. "Kami I've missed you bed. Murasakino's hammocks sure are nice but nothing beats a bed. I wish I knew why Kabuto rubs me the wrong way."
Hold up a moment. I can figure out why Kabuto irritates me, I'm an aspiring spymaster now.
I hop out of bed. "Summoning Jutsu!"
POOF
"Sup Al? How's things back in Sound?" Shirokumo scuttles up a wall to the web covered ceiling. "Oh I've missed this. There's something special about webs you make yourself."
"Yeah, you've got a mini fortress going on up there. Anyways I need your help." I plop back down on my bed. Now that he's here there's no need to stand.
"With what?"
"Remember Kabuto Yakushi? I had you deliver a report on him once."
"Vaguely. Never met the guy in person but I do have a plethora of information on him."
"Cool. Basically he rubs me the wrong way, there's something about him that I can't quite place that causes me to hate him but I can't figure it out. I want you to figure it out for me." Wait a moment. "How do you have information on him?"
"Oh that?" Shirokumo smirks from his web. "I've got a network set up here already. I did it while we were in Kusa. Figured you might need help spying on people here."
"Shirokumo you're brilliant!"
"I know I am." He smirks at me. "Honestly I just wanted to take some stuff off of your hands. You really overwork yourself. How many different things are yo trying to plan around now? Firstly you're protecting Sasuke to the extreme, you're spying on Orochimaru while being trained by him and I have no idea how that's still going on, then there's whatever the hell Akatsuki is. Anything else you want to add to the list?"
"Well... There's the whole Rinnegan thing." I have no idea how I'm going to handle that.
Firstly I need to somehow be in a position to do something and frankly I have no idea if the plot is even intact anymore. Then comes the real question, what do I do with them? The easiest solution is to destroy them. No Rinnegan means no one can summon the Gedo Mazu to imprison the bijuu and reform the Ten Tails, no one can use Rinne Rebirth to bring back Madara, and then no one will be able to cast the Infinite Tsukuyomi, and that means no Kaguya. Honestly that's probably the best idea I'll have.
But, and this is a major but, I have the Jiongu. It can take in other organs to enhance me, for example all of my hearts. It's feasible that I could take them for myself. Sure they might be a massive chakra drain but I have the chakra of more than one person, that won't be a problem at all. Then I'd always have access to all of the elements and I get way more dangerous if I use any of the Six Paths, especially the Asura Path.
The Asura Path grants the user mechanized limbs, weaponry and armor. I have a head full of memories from another world and in them is a bunch of weapons that no one here has ever seen. Hell if I do it right I could make a Gatling gun. I don't care how good of a shinobi you are, no one can stand up to two thousand metal slugs a minute.
Is it worth it?
"ALVARCUS!" Shirokumo yells.
"Hmm sorry what?" I sputter out. "Got lost in thought there."
"No shit. I was calling your name for a good thirty seconds." All eight of his eyes roll. "Now correct me if I'm wrong, the Rinnegan is the legendary dojutsu of the Sage of the Six Paths himself, yes?"
"Yep that's the one." I confirm.
"You know what? Fuck it, I don't want to know. Let's get back to the Kabuto guy. You know, the whole reason you summoned me in the first place?"
"Yeah that's probably for the best. Start with the closest problem. You said you have information on him, let's hear it. We're looking for any interactions he's had with me for starters."
"Let's see, there's the whole Konoha Chunin Exams thing. Kabuto approached the gennin under the guise of a helpful older nin who you all could turn to for advice and help. He was also supposed to help Sasuke, and by extension you, get to the tower after Orochimaru gave him the cursed seal."
"Knew that already. I don't think it's from the Exams." What could it be? "How about before? Did he scout me for anything?" I'm pretty sure Kabuto was Root trained. Did Danzo take an interest in me before now?
"Hmm... no. Maybe. If he did there's no record of it here." So that's possible then.
"Dammit. When did he leave Konoha? Let's try and narrow down our time frame."
"He left during the invasion." Shirokumo really knows his stuff. "No one reported him missing, in fact I'm pretty sure they assumed him KIA. I think his name is on the Monument and everything."
"Wow. I'll have to fix that when I go back. If I go back." I pause. "The invasion? What did he do during it? I never saw him."
"If my information is accurate - and it should be since it's from Orochimaru's files - he was the one who cast the genjutsu that put the stadium to sleep."
No. Could it be? Impossible.
"He was masquerading as a Suna ANBU to hide in plain sight."
I refuse. I don't want this to be true.
"There's this part I don't get though, the report got really evasive and inarticulate. From what I saw I think he was given a special task to complete before the tournament even started. It looks like Orochimaru had him hunt down and kill a random gennin for something. It doesn't make sense, the files didn't say what the purpose of it was. The gennin wasn't even a clan kid, there was no bloodline present at all. Kinda strange if you ask me, all of the other mission reports were very detailed and specific."
"The gennin. What was their name?" I whisper out.
"Let's see... if memory serves it was Sakura Haruno."
"Shirokumo get me to the Nest. Now." I'm livid. Those bastard. I'm going to kill them. I'm going to kill every last mother fucker who had anything to do with this!
"What? Why? I just got here!"
"Because I'm about to freak out. Really freak out. If I don't get out of here right now I'm going to slaughter everyone here until someone kills me." My voice is laced with fury.
"Give me ten seconds."
He poofs away.
I'm soon to follow.
The Nest
I land on my feet in a large empty clearing. Shirokumo is a healthy distance away from me.
"Shirokumo, warn the others to leave me alone for a while. I need to express some unadulterated rage."
"You got it." He runs off.
"They're behind it. They're behind Sakura's death. They're behind my parent's deaths. They're the reason I never met my sibling!"
I raise giant earth mounds out of the ground. I need a punching bag.
PUNCH
~They stole from us!~
The force of my blow causes a tremor in the ground. "I know!"
PUNCH
~What will you do now? Will you let them get away with this? Let them get away with the pain and suffering they've caused you?~
"Never! Their lives are forfeit! They will die!"
PUNCH
~I don't believe you. You've always known something has been off about that day, about that moment. You've never had proof, but deep down you knew it was them. Yet you live with these murderers, you break bread with them! Show me your resolve!~
"Oh believe me, they will die. Dying isn't enough, no it isn't near enough. They have to suffer first. They have to feel the pain I did!"
PUNCH
~YES! How will you do it? They took the only things you treasure in life, it's only fitting you do the same to them. Tell me, what will you do? How will you achieve your revenge?~
"I will tear Otogakure to the ground. I will force Orochimaru to watch as I pull Sasuke away from him, I will force him to watch as I burn everything he has worked so hard to build up. Then, and only then will he get to die."
PUNCH
~And how do you plan on killing him when that moment comes? A slit throat like your teammate? A beheading like your parents?~
"No. I'm going to do the only thing that I can, I'm going to put you inside him. I'm going to let him experience the agony that he put me through."
~MAGNIFICENT!~
With Shirokumo and Arachne
"What's wrong with him?" Arachne asks. "Last time he was here he seemed angered, but not like this. Even when he came here when he killed that child he wasn't this animated. This expressive. Something truly horrific must have happened."
"So you did see that. I always wondered if you did. Not much makes it past you, does it?"
"Shirokumo do not try to avoid this. He is my Summoner as well as yours. You know you need to tell me."
"I'm not completely sure, but I think he just found out who killed his family." Shirokumo gravely says to her.
"His family is dead?" She asks in shock. "I never knew."
"Worse. They were murdered right in front of him. I think he just found out who exactly was behind it and why they did it."
"Explain please. I won't ask him, I can't imagine the feeling of going through that. I don't know what I'd do without you."
"He always had a feeling, I could tell from watching him. His distrust of Orochimaru runs deeper than what you'd see on the surface, there was something more. He didn't realize it himself but it's part of the reason he came here, he wanted to find out if his family truly were murdered or if they were killed by chance. He found his answer today, Orochimaru was behind it all. He had our Summoner's family killed so he'd have one less reason to stay in Konoha. That's how twisted and sadistic the Snake Summoner is, he's willing to sacrifice lives for a mere chance of getting what he wants."
"... I'm beginning to rethink our alliance with the Snakes."
"Their next Summoner isn't bad. It's just this one, this Orochimaru. I've met the next one, he's Alvarcus's friend. I would even go as far as a brother. The way they care for each other you would think they came from the same egg sack."
"Really? It's rare for spiders to have bonds like that."
"Really. Sasuke's one hell of a person. He's brash and arrogant, but somehow that balances out Alvarcus's meticulous planning and playfulness. You wouldn't believe the schemes he has floating around in his head."
"So they're good for each other."
"Yeah. Never thought it could be possible, but it happened."
"Do you think he could make a good Sage?" Arachne asks. "Do you remember the last one?"
"I do. That was our first summoner, wasn't it?"
"Yes, she really was quite the handful wasn't she?"
"That she was. Sometimes I miss those days. The world was a simpler place. That was back when I still had color on my exoskeleton!"
"So, do you think he could become a Sage?"
Shirokumo hesitates. "I don't know. I don't know if he even can, the Jiongu could have irreparably damaged his chakra network and it might not be able to handle the stress of natural chakra. Even if he can, it's years too early to start him on it."
"He can summon you." Arachne pointedly says. "You know what that means."
"Just because he can summon me doesn't mean he is Sage material. That's only the first condition, there are many more trials he has yet to go through. Although I admit, I've never been the first spider to be summoned before."
"You're right as usual Ancient One." Arachne gracefully bows to Shirokumo.
"None of that now. We've worked on this, there's nothing wrong with questioning me."
"Sorry. It's a habit."
Two Hours Later, Back in Alvarcus's Room
POOF
"Where the hell have you been?" Tayuya's voice assaults me the moment I'm back.
"Needed to blow off some steam so I went to the Nest." I briskly reply.
"You couldn't even tell me that you made it back in one piece? I thought you died today! Last time I saw you, you were going to face down a hundred opponents by yourself! What the fuck man?"
"Tayuya!" I roar. She flinches at the volume. "The second I was back in Sound Orochimaru whisked me away to his office and had Kabuto rape my mind. I took exception to that and tried to kill him. Would have done it too if Orochimaru didn't save his sorry ass by throwing me into a wall! Then I came back here and went to the Nest to blow off steam because if I didn't I would have gone on a murderous rampage!"
She snorts. "Please, you don't do murderous rampages. You're not the type. I would know, I've met my fair share of them."
Most of the tension in my body leaves me. That's one of the good things about Tayuya, she doesn't get hung up on things most other people would. "Sad thing is you're right. I probably would have gotten through one or two dozen people and come back to my senses. What do you know, I guess I do have a shred of humanity still. I wonder when Orochimaru will corrupt that too."
She boldly strolls fully into my room and plops down on my bed. She pats the spot next to her. "Want to talk about it?"
I sit down next to her. "Not really. I got most of it out of my system already." Plus I can't exactly explain everything to her. Something like 'I just found out Orochimaru had my family slaughtered to get me here so he can fill his sick twisted sense of fatherhood that for some reason is fixating on me because he pulled me from the afterlife.' I'm sure that would go over well.
"You sure? I'll listen." She wraps me in a hug.
Stupid. This is stupid. I shouldn't let her be here. I should kick her out and tell her to leave me alone. I should distance myself from her. I need to do that, I can't get attached. I can't have someone here that I care about besides Sasuke. Only Sasuke is irreplaceable to Orochimaru, everyone else can be used against me.
"Maybe another time." I lean backwards and force both of us to fall onto my bed. I'll work on distancing myself from her later. For now I'm going to enjoy not being alone. "Right now I just want to sleep. I want this day to be over."
"If that's what you want." She snuggles deeper into my side. "I'll keep you warm this time, kay?"
I crack a small grin. She totally wants my body heat again. "Whatever you say."
We fall asleep like that.
The Next Morning
"Psst! Jirobo check this out!" Kidomaru whispers from the other side of my cracked open door. "You're not going to believe this!"
"What do you want Kidomaru? We're supposed to be looking for Tayuya. She missed this morning's group training exercises. I swear if this is- Holy shit. Sakon get over here."
"What's gotten you both so- Damn. When did this happen?"
"How should I know?" Jirobo says in exasperation. "Should we wake them up or leave them alone?"
"Leave us the fuck alone you assholes." Tayuya grumbles from my side without lifting her head off my chest. "Unless you want your asses kicked."
Kidomaru snickers. "Better yet should we go get Orochimaru-sama?"
"Do it and die." I growl out with the least amount of movement possible. I'm very comfortable right now, and contrary to what I said last night Tayuya is actually keeping me warm. "This was such a pleasant morning. Then you dicks showed up."
"You sure we're the only dicks to show up?" Kidomaru wisecracks. "Hold up, can you even get it up? Your thread thingy didn't have side effects did it?"
I snap open an eye to glare at him. "Yes you insufferable heretic! I will kill you. They will never find the body. It will be the ultimate stress relief."
"That's not the only thing that's going to be relieved!"
"Kidomaru enough." Sakon cuts in. "We will leave the lovebirds to themselves this time. As nice as it is that you two are... now whatever the two of you have become, I expect you to not miss practice again Tayuya."
Thankfully the three males of the Sound Four leave us.
"I hate your teammates." I growl out. "Who the fuck asks that?"
"That's okay, I hate them sometimes too." She snuggles deeper into me. "How long can we stay like this?"
"As long as we want. Or until Orochimaru demands something from one of us."
Minutes Later
"Orochimaru-sama you're not going to believe this!" Kidomaru calls from outside of Orochimaru's office. Jirobo and Sakon are flanking either side of him.
"And what, pray tell, will I not believe?" Orochimaru looks up from an illustration of the human body's chakra network.
"Tayuya and Alvarcus slept together last night!" Kidomaru blurts out.
"Good." Orochimaru goes back to his diagram. "I'm surprised Tayuya got him to move that quickly, I thought he was more reserved than that."
"Oh, not like that." Kidomaru hastily specifies. "We caught them sleeping in each others arms. It was adorable."
"Interesting." Orochimaru taps his chin with his pen as he contemplates something. "Perhaps it was a good idea to have Tayuya seduce him to strengthen his ties to Otogakure. His presence here is tentative at best. This way it will be more than just Sasuke keeping him here."
"Wait, you knew Tayuya was trying to get him?" Kidomaru asks in surprise. "I thought for sure you'd be pissed that your child got corrupted by her."
"Of course I knew." Orochimaru condescendingly says. "I ordered it myself when he showed the tiniest hints of attraction to her. Why do you think I always chose Tayuya to fetch him? Why do you think I sent her as their escort for the Chunin Exams? Neither Alvarcus or Sasuke would have any trouble with genjutsu and Sasuke is formidable with them on his own. It was a farce to get them to accept her presence so that Tayuya could get closer to Alvarcus. In all actuality you, Kidomaru, would be the most effective of the Sound Four to accompany them. Both Sasuke and Alvarcus are close range fighters, you have very diverse long range fighting capabilities."
"Huh." Kidomaru smartly says back to his boss. "The more you know. It's weird though, I've seen her seduce people for missions before. I would swear that there's genuine attraction going both ways."
"Sakon, Jirobo. Do you agree with your teammate?" Orochimaru asks.
"I could see it." Sakon replies. "When we first met him, the flirting and such was forced. Now it seems... natural."
"Yeah, it's definitely different from when she forces it. Either she got really good at acting or she's genuinely smitten with him."
"How unexpected." Orochimaru smiles deviously. "Unexpected, yet not unwelcome."
Unknown to everyone present, a small brown spider hidden behind one of the scrolls starts to shake in fury.
OMAKE: Orochimaru Reacts... Differently
"Orochimaru-sama you're not going to believe this!" Kidomaru calls from outside of Orochimaru's office. Jirobo and Sakon are flanking either side of him.
"And what, pray tell, will I not believe?" Orochimaru looks up from an illustration of the human body's chakra network.
"Tayuya and Alvarcus slept together last night!" Kidomaru blurts out.
"My child did what?" Orochimaru hisses out through clenched teeth.
"Slept with Tayuya that's what he did! We caught them this morning still in each others arms!"
Orochimaru flies out of his chair and storms over to the intercom system. "Alvarcus. My office. Now!"
"We're... going to go now." Kidomaru, Sakon and Jirobo make a quick escape.
Alvarcus walks into Orochimaru's office. "You called? I was having a nice morning. Did this have to happen now?"
"I've already been informed you had a 'nice' morning. Sit down." Orochimaru orders.
Alvarcus takes a tentative seat. "Look... if this-"
"Silence!" Orochimaru roars. "Do not speak."
Alvarcus nods vigorously.
"Good." Orochimaru walks over to a blackboard and slaps up two very detailed diagrams of... the human reproductive systems? "Welcome to Sexual Education."