A nicely orchestrated romance in a high fantasy realm. Well, there's nothing quite like young love in an interesting setting and with an unusual twist. The main character seems to be finding herself and potentially she may be coming to understand her feelings for a few people in the future. The author has painted a very vivid picture of the aristocratic world that is being introduced. That being said, there were a few grammatical mistakes, especially in the earlier chapters; so, I'd recommend the author give the work a fresh read-through to touch them up. Still, this has all the right fixings for an interesting romance tale. I'd recommend it, keep up the good work!
Perhaps, you could break this paragraph up into a few more. So far, your prose is good, and the story is entertaining.
I was an avid daydreamer, a cherished childhood pastime that had stuck with me as a lifelong habit. My daydreams often revolved around traveling and engaging in activities my father would never allow. However, on this particular occasion, my thoughts transported me to a picturesque orchard. Birds filled the air with joyful chirping, butterflies danced in the breeze, and fallen leaves were gently carried away. Descending from my swing, I reached for an apple within my grasp. Stretching on tiptoe, I sensed a presence from behind, swiftly plucking the fruit from the branch. Turning to identify the unknown guest, I found myself met by the gaze of King Elrond. He graced me with a warm smile, tenderly kissed my hand, and said my name with a mesmerizing cadence, it felt too good to be true and of course it was because he continued saying my name as if he were summoning my attention, uttering, "Princess Aiyana, Princess, Princess Aiyana." His voice echoed as I slowly returned to reality, only to realize it was Sephora gently tapping me.
Cupid Royale
Fantasy · The_Vntage_Pen
Wow okay, quite the ride. This story's world is pretty interesting, especially with the latest chapter's development. A very different and very cool take on the use of systems in a novel. I like it, it will lead to a lot of new development for the genre. There are some definite grammar and punctuation errors, and some parts seem slightly rushed, but with polish, I think this story has a lot of potential (story essence is far more important than technique that can still be refined). I can nitpick a few other things, but in the end, it's the author's story to tell, and they seem quite capable of telling a good one. Good luck, and I look forward to future updates.
Kind of an abrupt transition. Maybe just add a little more detail to this reawakening so it's more obvious what's occurred to the reader.
This paragraph has been deleted.
The Duke's Youngest Son is a Regressor
Fantasy · Rerian
Thank you for catching this! I've corrected the error.
"At least this cell has a companion," he mumbled, his gaze resting on the infant yakshi, the nascent divine soul of a tree deity, that slumbered peacefully, resembling a flawless porcelain doll, nestled amid a cushion of newly sprouted lichen and the roots of the majestic banyan tree at the stern of the raft.
Mythra: A New Age of Heroes
Fantasy · ATriste
Alright, so the stability of updates could use a bit of work, but I'm guessing this is a work in progress. The premise of this story is really quite good though, I hope Rerian tries to develop this story more because I'm actually interested to see what happens next despite there only being a couple of chapters. There are some grammar and punctuation errors, but nothing so major that it makes the story hard to read. I personally think the story should stay in the first-person perspective, the storyline feels very personal, which I think gives the plot a little something extra. So Rerian if you read this, please keep it 1st person. All-in-all I'd say this will be a really decent read once more chapters come out. Sirius is a very likable and relatable main character and the first chapter is pretty compelling for an introduction. Good job!
This book has been deleted.
Capitalize 'some' and 'which' in the following line. The prose are good though.
This book has been deleted.
-
original Mythra: A New Age of Heroes
4.82
Author Updates: *Attention* TUESDAY'S RELEASE WILL COME OUT WEDNESDAY DUE TO EMERGENCY! *** Synopsis: A long time ago, there was a golden age for mortals. Heroes walked among the masses, and the dao was the pursuit of all. It was a time of great prosperity. But then, calamity struck, and nearly all life in the mortal realms was wiped out. Desperate, survivors beseeched the gods for aid, but their prayers seemed to go unanswered—until Ea, The Great Savior, King of the Gods, descended. He subdued the calamity, herding it away to the depths of the earth, and was never heard from again. Now, 1000 years later, a new age of heroes dawns. However, in times of heroes, disasters often lurk. With Ea still absent, the pressing question remains: If the sky is to fall, who will rise to bear its weight? Welcome to Gaea, where mythology intertwines with fantasy in the epic saga of a boy's journey—a tale of life, heroism, and the divine. *** Release Schedule: 3-4 times per week; usually every other day. *** Warnings: *ATTENTION* The first 8 chapters (Titled: There Once Was a Great Flood) are PROLOGUE, you do not have to read them to understand the main story, but they will add context for you later on. As this novel chapters will be released multiple times weekly the chapters following chapter one will be closer to 1500 - 2000 words per chapter. This book contains sexually explicit scenes, inappropriate language, physical and verbal abuse, violence, and gore which may be triggering for some readers. Please read at one's own risk as a trigger warning will not be designated at each chapter. If there are any changes to the update schedule I will post it on social media and the discord so please follow and join the community. I will also post fun updates and character art on social media. *** Extra Content: IG: @TheRealATriste X: @TheRealATriste Discord: https://discord.gg/ux35ema9 World Map: https://imgur.com/a/jPmohPh18 Chs 11 Collections
Shameless author 5-star review because f*ck yea I love my story! If you're following along and enjoying the story please leave some comments and reviews. I love to hear what you guys think about the story, it makes my day. Also, keep the power stones coming [img=update]! Love you all!
Mythra: A New Age of Heroes
Fantasy · ATriste