Sparky357 - Profile

Greed but with caution is good to have when you are not the strongest.

yes the fool reminds me of actors in a play.

ok now we are getting to the good part.

glad he is being intelligent and learning from his past mistakes and exercising caution.

cunningness and scheming I am all here for it

I must admit he sounds like a spoiled child a lot of the time and how do the traits affect him anyway and is the childness intentional and if so what are his goals and aspirations?

this is why he should have wished for a perfect mindset

that is why for the last wish he should have used it on the perfect mindset for success.

Honestly I would wish for the perfect mindset and will to achieve eternal life.

either way it's a good refresher since their are many paths to power in your book so I don't mind extra context on the subject of power.

I love the greediness.

what about the ancestral trials when he was a egg same question.

so question did legion take every single trial or only the best ones once he qualified.

seriously I was extremely confused 🤔

Hahaha you are funny but I wish you the best in your writing it's tough writing hope my critiques didn't discourage you but give you feedback and some points you can incorporate if you so choose.

drat is referring to myself

back in time drat should have gone back to the drawing board.

some constructive criticism A fact of a world with cultivation if you are running with such a world that is are that those at the top exploit those at the bottom to accomplish tasks and gather resources in exchange for techniques,protection and future prospects. It should be ingrained at this point that the strong can do whatever they want which doesn't seem to have clicked in the 16 odd years that the MC has been their. Another point I am trying to make is why give these so called disciples anything if they are not contributing to the sect in any way except to slaughter them which would raise the question why invest resources in the first place if they are not instructed correctly.

how generous to allow them to sit up to hear his voice surprised our mc didn't go full Karen mode.

very interesting start I am eager to know what his aspirations and goals are.