TheNeeD - Profile

Reading the comments, I see an extremely sad situation. Everyone likes this work so much that I have doubts about the objectivity of the assessment. But who am I to tell people what's good and what's not? The story could be interesting, but the implementation is as always... 1) The alignment of forces in the world is completely ignored, there is no balance (Without seals, the whole JL overcomes, and what will happen when at least 5 are opened?): 2) The logic of the characters is completely broken (Deprived of someone's limbs? And let's call her to the headquarters! The Batman... BATMAN pushed aside his paranoia and took her to the orbital base. And if you look more closely, it becomes scary there in general) 3) Another evil character who became evil just to be evil. No motivation, no personality development, just under the yoke of an experience that he doesn't even remember. 4) Character selection (subjective opinion).

You know, I wanted to write a lot, but for some reason I changed my mind. The problem of authors who try to write in the style of "wuxia" is that they try to imitate too much and take not the most reasonable things. An example is the ratio in the battle of different ranks (Chapter 7). On what principles was this relationship based, was individual skill and teamwork taken into account? The area, the composition of the group and further on the list. Personally, I doubt it and it was invented like: "Well, it will do." But there are other problems, but I'm too lazy to write about it. It was certainly interesting, but with this work we are not on the way. I wish the author success.

I opened this work with the thoughts: "Darkseid in Marvel? It will be interesting." But this unfulfilled dream was shattered by grammar. I realized that everything was very, very bad when I felt the moisture that came out of my eyes, and this moisture is not tears.

With each new chapter, the story looks worse and worse. 1) Zero emotions, an empty hero - Died? Well, he died and died, who doesn't happen to? Zero emotions, zero reactions. Met God? Pfft. I see them every day, what's the big deal? The hero has no past, just an unnecessary dummy. 2) The smartest, most logical, most correct move on the part of the heroine. Which one? And the one when she tells everyone right and left that she can shift the boundaries. Hmm.... Okay. How did he (Vali) know she it shifts exactly these boundaries (see the fifth chapter). What prevents her from using the same time or space to increase the activation of the mechanism or redirect magic somewhere into the void? 3) Oh yes, another author who forgets that in English (and not only) there is such a thing as "PRONOUNS" in the language. Is it that hard to replace the name "Yukari" with "She"? Of course, it's easier to write her name ten times.

"I think you missed the point. When she calls herself rational the whole point is that she actually isn’t and everyone else knows it. The Reginleif even points out your exact point in like the very next chapter…" ------ And that's not typical? The heroine is "The smartest", everyone knows this, except the heroine herself. This has never happened before and here you are again. A typical "Rational" heroine. ----- "Also heroines aren’t “typically lazy” " We open the first chapter and see such a line as: "Personality: Lazy". If the author himself says that she is lazy... Okay, convinced. We open the chapter in which the event is taking place, when they were given cards, what does she do? Come on? Oh, and she's sleeping. And how did it happen?

"hateful" How convenient, isn't it? And to read the works and the essence of my claims?

Everything you need to know about this story. 1) A typical lazy heroine. 2) A typical strong heroine. 3) A typical heroine who explains to everyone that they are wrong and that she is the most rational. 4) I can still describe how typical a heroine she is, but I won't. Although the wariness appeared even after " Cebrail Caritas - BIO", but for some reason I decided it would be a good idea to try to read it. I think you understand that this was not a very good idea. The 10th chapter caused the most disappointment. "The only enforcer who does not kill," "Swore that she would not kill anymore.".. That's never happened, that's never seen this. The demons wanted to kidnap and sell the Valkyrie? Oh, well, let them walk. Can they get up and find another victim in a week? Oh, yes, she's "Rational."..

The author rewrote the story 3 hours ago. There was another basis of the plot.

Let me try to sort everything out. 1) She was a scientist who wanted to conduct experiments on humans, but she was not given the go-ahead. 2) She turns to criminal gangs to find support there. 3) Representatives of law enforcement agencies come to her. 4) She, who got caught trying to experiment on people, goes to play intrigue with Danzo. So here's the question. How does she, who got caught by ordinary people, want to beat Danzo and the root? Let me remind you that there are such clans as Aburame, Nara, Yamanaka, Uchiha, Hyuga. Do you yourself believe that she had at least a chance? Now, as for her genjutsu. Logic? Balance of power? What for? Kekkei genkai. It's such a hackneyed topic that I don't even want to talk. And the last one. The author rewrote the story a couple of hours ago. So there is no point in commenting on it anymore.

You know, reading this story, I begin to understand that logic and this fanfiction are incompatible. If everything was +-good before DxD, then complete nonsense began. He is seven years old. SEVEN, but he is already an alpha male who crushes every woman he meets. Pure-blooded demon, longinus, golden figures of evil. I don't even know what else to add. What the fuck is this pretentiousness? Why all this posturing? Another important factor is the narrative. Before each dialogue, insert the word "Said" ... why are you doing this to my eyes? Have you even read your own text? If you don't give a shit about the minimal signs of logic, if you want to watch a hero at 7 years old fuck everything that moves and what doesn't move, moves and fucks, as well as cheap posturing, then you are here.

How much the story is cliched and beaten up, which is terrible. The first chapter passed with a big squeak. A typical mom's killer/researcher/Special Forces soldier who moves to another world. Okay, you can live. The heroine, at the age of 7, begins to make plans how to enslave the root... At 7 years old. I am completely calm. A man who lived in peacetime, who was FOUND trying to experiment on people, in the second chapter, Danzo overplays. Is everything okay with logic? Okay, it's been more than once, we'll endure it somehow. And here's next... I don't even know how to describe it. It would be good if it wasn't so bad. But when it came to the kekkei-genkai, I realized that I had to run from here and run as fast as possible.

I don't even know how to evaluate this work. I was interested in it, I'm interested in reading, but the problem is that the translator didn't even bother to adapt the work. In Japan, special suffixes are used when communicating (san, sensei, sama, kun and others), but right there we see "Senior", "Junior". Constant repetition of character names, okay, just names, but their full version (Rei Miyamoto, Takashi Komuro)? When the name of some key characters is completely lost somewhere (Busujima). The work is interesting, but when the original work is based on Japanese fundamentals, and you continue to bend the line to the Chinese, then there is a desire to quit.

How would it be easier to explain. Do you use only first names or pronouns when talking to someone? Description of landscapes (We could see the mountain, the mountain was high) | (We could see the mountain, it was high.). Description of the person (Alex was standing next to me, Alex was blond) | (Alex was standing next to me, he was blond.). Or as an example (The sun was at the zenith, the sun was yellow.) | (The sun was at the zenith, it was yellow). And the problem is that pronouns are not used in principle (Maybe it was a couple of times). When one name is mentioned five times per paragraph, it hurts the eyes. The use of the simplest pronouns (He, she, it, you, we) is not as difficult and not as eye-cutting as the constant use of the name.

After reading half of the chapter, I had one question: Does the author know what pronouns are? In each (well, almost) paragraph, the hero's name is mentioned more than twice. And to protect my eyes, I decided that with this work we are not on the way

Everything you need to know about this story: 1. The name of the hero... A setting in which everyone has Japanese names. Finn... Anderson... Words are superfluous here. 2. In each new sentence and/or paragraph, the name of the hero. It's like I didn't understand his name the first time. 3. Another slave of the system.

If everything was fine at the beginning, then some nonsense began a little further. 1) Doppelganger ring? Seriously? The beauty of the original story is that we are looking at the development of ordinary office plankton into insensitive, cruel undead, and then immediately such a indulgence. 2) Name change? What for? Remind me why Momonga changed his name in the original? 3) Oh yes, titles. I'm even too lazy to paint and explain anything. 4) Most of the story is, in fact, a copy of the original. Why new characters? To pull over a couple of lines and actions? What has changed in the world? I'm disappointed.

Last time I stopped at chapter 61. I decided to reread it, but the result turned out to be about the same. Everything has descended to the typical Chinese cultivation garbage. Is the student drowning in greed? It doesn't matter, I'll come up with any stupid excuses. Why direct him to the right path, make him a worthy member of society? Everything is fine as it is. Then the question is: Why were these doubts to take her as a student or not, why was it necessary to check her character if they eventually scored on it? The second STUDENT may have doubts,? No, he's definitely my student already. Well, yes, well, yes... Enemies are contacting it is unclear with whom? Come on, I'll stand and wait. Could there be problems? Well, that's fine. Wait a minute, though... Not so long ago it was said that he (the Hero) already has enough problems ... Oops. As a result: One of the main functions of the teacher is not fulfilled, a typical Chinese humor that will ignore everything, come up with stupid excuses, will complain about life, although it is his own fault or the solution to the situation is so obvious, but the hero will ignore it. And then what? Typical jokes about topographical criticism? Thick-skinned? "Lonely dog"? We know, we have seen, we have passed.

What can I say other than "praise" for the timeliness of this advice? Thank you, otherwise I didn't realize that I had to stop reading this work when I saw enough "ingenious" solutions in half a chapter.

"Even Ainz used a sword." Why did he use it? Did he use it on a regular basis or for some purpose? Did he use it to show off or for some purpose? Does he need a sword because it looks "Cool" or for some purpose? I think that three times used "For some purpose" for something will make you think. --- The main claim is not that he uses a sword, but for what purpose he uses it. --- Have you read my comments or just decided to take out of context only what you need? --- Why a magician who can use the magic of space and time sword? I think it's not worth explaining that he, the main character, knew what kind of world he would get into and what would be waiting for him.