searingsoul

I don't mind the unnecessary dramatic build up but I feel the story's flow is being ruined because there characters sound like people from Chinese cultivation novels. American characters don't think or talk in such manner which is really affecting the whole story.

Sequence Potions from Lord of Mysteries, Nice Touch.

I am really not following this chain of conversation that went from "You entered my territory" to "Let's fight so that I can break through my limits against a 15 year old with more brains and hard work than the entire supernatural world". If humans could truly use blade blacksmith such a way then they could have created their own sacred gears by now and devils would have destroyed all the pantheons in the world.

So ... MC can shoot pebbles through tree trunks but had trouble dealing with a few hundred zombies. Yeah, that makes sense.

MC seems like a maso simp, he totally acting like some sort of pet/mascot/guide for the group. Even gave the leadership to Takeshi, Pathetic. Also his fake history rants are annoying, like he has not even gone through any of that stuff but simply inherited some warped memories that are a mix of Mukaza from Noblesse world and HOTD world's fake vampire and werewolf history. The story really lacks proper foundation for the MC.

I think this MC is a stupid brute because despite being powerful he keeps fighting head on even when he does not need to. He could have just lure the dead out of the way to clear the path in advance? The zombies are not really smart and would follow anyone who makes a lot of noise. He could have just created a distraction and escape from the roof but instead he took the whole group to fight the dead head on while having their back against the wall. Clearly very stupid to entirely depend of the plot based rescue when things are already different from the plot.

I don't have any ill intention when I say this but the author seems to be overly descriptive about unimportant things and also uses too much of flowery language which is having a negative effect on the reading experience.

Interesting start, I think I have rarely seen MCs in fanfic obtaining their wishes in such a manner.

Am I the only one who feels like this is a dialogue between two Chinese scholars?

Disgusting! This guy is really spineless, he lets both Stark and SHIELD walk all over him.