/ Anime & Comics / Danmachi: Bell Gojo throughout the Multiverse
Danmachi: Bell Gojo throughout the Multiverse
Peringkat tidak cukup
Ringkasan
Bell with a diffrent mindset and Gojo Satoru's Abilities.
tagar
Penggemar
-
![WRizz1]()
WRizz1 Berpartisipasi 85 -
![Nikluas]()
Nikluas Berpartisipasi 6 -
![Voidreality0001]()
Voidreality0001 Berpartisipasi 5
Status Power Mingguan
-- Peringkat
Power 
-- Power
stone Anda Mungkin Juga Menyukai
7Ulasan-ulasan
- Kualitas penulisan
- Stabilitas Pembaruan
- Pengembangan Cerita
- Desain Karakter
- Latar Belakang Dunia
Bagikan pikiran Anda dengan orang lain
Tulis ulasan
Author, I think you had a good idea for the story, but you still need to improve your writing quality a little. As another guy commented, you need more description of the scenes, and also better formatting, because there are places that needed a paragraph and don't have one... but the idea is good, your writing stability is also good, you just need to improve your writing and you'll be a good writer.
It's entertaining, so that your inspiration doesn't go away you should upload chapters every two or three days, obviously the chapters being longer, or else short chapters but every day, in the end it's you who decides.
How do you feel this story should progress? Please comment, as I need your opinions to improve my story if there is something that people think is missing.
too fast, and i can't feel the thrill from it's fight. even the romance is too bland. i mean is it anticlimactic story but why I feel it too bland?, well your explanation of enemies is too short. it's felt like even the juggernaut is just canon fodder. why it's suddenly become level 6??. anyway... you author did good work make the concept of adding Alfia skill on bell. but seriously? he don't have many interaction with character. (simply too short, i cant feel the soul of your work buddy) you got my five star on character design. and one star for world background. [this proud dragon gave you honest review ] **smug**
Membuka SPOILER
es el clásico Isekai del tipo que dice todas mías, amigo la estructura de la escritura necesita trabajo, es algo difícil de leer el protagonista no tiene peso ni sustancia. se siente muy monótono la historia.
You only get such a low score mainly due to your writing being awful, I'm not gonna sugarcoat it because then you wouldn't learn from it. This entire story sounds like it was written by an 8-year-old. I suggest using either Grammarly or QuillBot Ai, they don't instantly make your writer better, but they can scan your text tell you what's wrong, and give you ideas on how to improve.