Bab 93: Juggernaut
"Heehehehe hahahahaha hohahahe!" I laughed uncontrollably when we were told that Bayville High School was sending its kids to a survival training camp hosted by retired drill instructors and asked if we wanted to go to that or train with Wolverine.
Storm did not appear amused.
"Oh…" I stopped laughing, "You're being serious."
"I am." Storm responded.
"Hhaaahahhahaha!" I laughed again, "Oh my God. Thank you. I really needed that laugh. We are definitely choosing Wolverine."
"Mr. Gatatog. Next time refrain from laughing in my face when I ask you a question." Storm declared then left.
Damn she is good coming and going. Especially going.
After everyone left Wolverine turned to us and I cracked out the Horn of Party Hardy.
"Hey, man. Train to see if we can survive infinite liquor?" I offered the manlet.
Logan took in a deep breath, held it a moment, then grinned.
"My man!"
Many hours later on the stairs to the X-Mansion.
"Who dafaq is this big motha faka breaking down the gates to my new pad?" I grumbled while Cain Marko, AKA the Juggernaut, broke through the gate of the X-Mansion.
"Don't know." Logan grunted his answer, "But he'z lookin fer and ass whoopin!"
Watching Wolverine, drunk on liquor that completely resists advanced healing factors, run up and get punted by the Juggernaut was pretty funny, but I couldn't laugh because some fucking loser just walked up and punted my boy! My stoop brother!
It's time for some mother fucking vengeance, baby!
I held out my hand and summoned Volendrung. Sure, I was dickriding Thor and Kratos when I added that feature to my hammer, but I'm not going to pass up a slick feature just because someone else did it first.
"You done fucked up tiny." I said to the shorter and less physically developed combatant.
"Bitch, I'm the Juggernaut!" He shouted in a rip off of himself circa X-Men: The Last Stand.
I decided to take the opportunity to cut loose on someone with the tankiness to make me work up a sweat beating ass. A flood of Rc cells covered my body, casing me in a suit of blood red segmented interlocking plates and sprouting a massive pair of arms from my back. The head to toe armor was soon joined by large spikes emerging from my traps and a blazing pair of wings spreading out down the extra arms. My tail thickened and grew a massive blade. Both my arms thickened and lengthened, becoming a smaller match to the pair that came out of my back, and a spiked pavis formed over my left forearm tipped with a diamond hard lance.
My face was covered entirely by a red mask that split open to create a jagged maw and a trio of eyes grew out, black sclera and each bearing three pupils. My horns grew larger and a series of spikes grew from the back of my head to join those growing out of my traps.
I basically looked like Gore Magala, Nergigante, and Glavenus got together and made a blood red baby that can take on the world.
With a draconic roar I pounced on the approaching Juggernaut and slammed the Hammer of Might into him with a full powered explosion that shattered the mansion windows.
"I actually felt that." He grinned behind his stupid looking dome helmet.
Rather than talk I bathed him in fire till he put a meaty paw over my mouth.
"Damn, Puff." I grunted, "That fucking hurt!"
I got my shield up in time and shunted most of the damage of his strike to the stars of Skyrim before hitting the bastard with two quick overhand wing strikes that backed him up before spinning around and slamming my bladed tail on him in a blow that knocked the wind out of him.
"Nice!" He shouted as he pulled back and caught his breath, "Ain't been hit that hard, well, ever. Going to enjoy tearing you apart, lizard."
He ran at me to cover the distance and even if he isn't his best self, I knew better than to stand in front of him once he has got some momentum. I brought down an overhead strike of my hammer in front of him and blew the ground out from underneath him, causing the Juggernaut to trip and then I played a vicious game of whack a mole on his back that kept the big boy from getting up.
As I upped the power of the strikes to the max I began striking away his armor and flesh, breaking his ribs and spine.
I won, but it was against one of the weakest incarnations of the guy.
At least he brought lunch.
As I tore strips from the broken Juggernaut I felt something like a fly buzzing in my head. Annoying, but nothing worth stopping dinner over.
"Grunt, please stop!" Came the frantic voice of Charles Xavier as he ran out of the mansion.
"Lot of meat here that he isn't going to be using with his back that fucked." I commented on the shattered vertebrae sticking out of his skin.
"Be that as it may, he is a defeated foe, in his state he cannot hurt anyone so I must insist you stop inflicting harm on him." Charles demanded.
"But why though?" I asked.
"Grunt, there aren't many moments in a life where a person can be a hero." Xavier spoke impassioned, "Defeating my brother was a reaction, stepping up in a moment of crisis, but what you do now, after he is defeated is what defines your character. Yes, you are strong, but strength is not a virtue. It merely is. How you choose to use that strength when there is no pressure on you is more important than how you use it in the heat of the moment. Right now it is your choice what to do with Cain, and it is that choice that will determine whether or not you are a hero. There aren't many moments when these choices appear. Make a sacrifice, conquer a flaw, save a friend… spare an enemy. In these moments, everything else falls away. The way the world sees us. The way we…"
I couldn't help myself. I raised up my bladed tail and when the time was right drove it into one of the wounds Volendrung broke open on his back, impaling the Juggernaut and raising him into the air and sending him flying into a nearby tree.
Seeing his brother mortally wounded, Xavier bent over and puked.
"Why?" he cried.
"You were droning on!" I complained.
"This is why you people need High School!" He decried, "You teenagers are fucking savages!"
Dude. Not cool. That's totally ageist.
The atmosphere around the dinner table was frosty to say the least. Professor X had called the kids back as reinforcements and they caught the tail end of the fight. Get it? TAIL end! You know, because I killed him with my tail.
Anyway, they didn't appreciate me stopping a convicted serial killer who broke out of prison from murdering his brother. Especially Scott, that fucking boy scout. Almost makes me okay with the fact that Xavier is grooming the guy to be his personal fuck toy.
I also think it doesn't help our relationship that Jean is sending me major bedroom eyes all the time. She gets like that around Jack too, but not Kat and Linda. I'd consider it a hard pass if she wasn't her X-Men Red version. The whole Phoenix thing never goes well for the people around her, but with her looking like that I'll have to take some time to brush up on my cosmic entity psychology.
As I ate another piece of pork I muttered, "Not as good as the Juggernaut."
"Okay!" Scott erupted, "Are we just going to act like we don't have a bunch of cannibals at the table. Like this giant lizard alien didn't just kill and eat a guy in front of us!"
"Scott." Professor X chided, "They have never been to High School."
"How does that matter!" he made a good point.
Xavier just put his face in his palm as a sign of disappointment in his protégé, "One day, you will understand, Scott."
I was starting to wonder about the magic of High School. Was I walking into a trap to make me a better person?
I was quad deep in a bent over Linda when a knock on our door sounded.
"Do we need to start putting a sock on the door?" I asked my squirting lover, "All my roommates are here getting pounded, so that doesn't seem necessary…" I mused, "Fuck it. I am always willing to advertise that I am getting laid."
I pulled out and Linda collapsed when I let her go and answered the door. Jean was there and she looked like she wanted to say something before she got mesmerized by my smooth lizard cock.
"Gimme that!" she shouted and pushed me into the room with her mind before following herself and literally tearing her clothes off.
For some people, her behavior would be a sign. A sign to run like a scared little bitch, but you can ask Zaeed how many fucks I have to give about encounters like this.
PERTIMBANGAN PENCIPTA 
JManM
JManM Before people get up in arms about Grunt beating the Juggernaut, remember that this is the Evolution version. Cain isn't conceptually unstoppable, he is just a guy who is really strong and really tanky. He is a season one scrub enemy.
Also, this is the max power Grunt. With his connection to Skryim resestablished Grunt's striking power is more than doubled and so is his tankyness. Through in his powers as a Red One and a demigod weilding what has the potential to be a Noble Phantasm level weapon and we are starting to get the picture on how ideal a fight this was for Grunt.
For those interested, Grunt's wings aren't physically capable of providing the lift required for him to fly, but they do add tactile telekenis to him, allowing him to fly and always generate max leverage.
You can support me and my family at
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Bab 94: Storm Breaker
I am almost certain that Jean is obsessed with me and Jack because of our descent from Ormagoden. Like the Phoenix that is repressed inside her, Ormagoden is a creature of fire, destruction, and life. In a case of like reaching out to like, we all possessed an intense attraction towards each other that we didn't fight.
While most of the X-Teens were put off by the suddenness of our new relationship, no doubt whipped up at every opportunity by Captain Lasers, free love Professor X was very supportive of it. Young people exploring their boundaries is the spirit of High School, he said.
When we finally attended this American High School that was supposed to grind down our rough edges and see us become working members of society it was already finals week. We attended two half day sessions at the school and breezed through a few exams that would serve as the entirety of our grade for the semester. The response to us was as negative as expected, but far different from what would have happened in a normal X-Men romp.
I had determined one key difference in the absence of Sublime. For the uninitiated, Sublime is a microscopic parasite hivemind that has infected the entire human population except those with the X-Gene who are immune to it. Because of this Sublime makes all baseline humans hate X-Gene mutants to greater and lesser extent based on plot necessity. Basically Sublime is a McGuffin used to reset any progress the X-Men should make via their heroism.
Without Sublime gunking up the works, Charles Xavier has already won most of the battle for mutant civil rights, having gotten anti-discrimination laws passed federally after decades of campaigning. He was the Mutant Martin Luthur King Jr. to Magneto's Eldridge Cleaver.
During this time period Kurt Wagner and Rogue got into some Mystique related shenanigans but Team Eat'em wasn't invited to participate for obvious reasons.
We didn't actually do much with the X-Men - as they refused to train with us and honestly the danger room isn't advanced enough to test us - until we were hanging out in the backyard of the mansion and got attacked by teenaged versions of Burner, Lifter, Peepers, Shocker, and Slither. If you aren't impressed by that line up you're in good company as we weren't either.
"Nice." I barked when a silver orb came down to take me up to Asteroid M.
"Let Jean out of the cryo tube." I told Magneto, "Should probably keep Storm in there, but Jean will be cool with us here."
"You believe that you can keep the psychic in line?" Erik Lehnsherr asked in his neat bad guy uniform.
"Wouldn't have recommended it if I didn't think I could." I answered.
"Very well." Eric agreed and let the girl rapidly thaw out.
"Grunt?" Jean sighed, "What's going on?"
"I'd tell you to chill, but we just thawed you out." I told her, "Xavier's pal Magneto has got an offer to buff our mutant powers with a device he has made. I am taking the opportunity and so are Jack, Kat, and Linda. For you… eh… maybe. Side effects haven't been tested much yet so I suggest you put it off till we have had time to observe all the results."
I fixed an eye onto Mags and he nodded his head in understanding.
After everyone assembled, Jack and I hit the machine first. I felt the powers we took from Sabretooth maximize, but other than that no changes. If it had maxed out all the power we'd taken over the years that would have been sweet.
Linda and Kat got far more power proportionally out of this shebang than we did by the virtue of Sabretooth's powers making up proportionally more of their overall strength than ours. The Summer's brothers were the first people to experience side effects since Sabretooth himself had been on the run since our encounter and thus wasn't here. They came out of the chamber buffed up with bone white hair and apparently completely stripped of emotion. The smugly superior smirks on their faces made lie of that which means that Scott and Alex are just assholes high on a power trip for what comes next.
Alarms blared and Magneto ordered the pair to defend Asteroid M from the approaching X-copter. They botched it and Jean had to pull them away from the crashing vehicle. After that everyone was kung fu fighting as the X-Men and the Brotherhood beefed it out. Scott got a very stern talking to from Jean which didn't seem to have much of a reaction aside from letting him know what a knob he was being.
In the end he and his brother blew their Cyttorak loads before it settled by blasting Asteroid M with their full power, reverting them from their Chad enhanced forms right back to their virgin teenager forms and everything went back to normal like the Cauldron never happened. Except for me and my battle harem. We got to keep the powerup till it fully set because none of the fighting was even close to making us expend effort.
Over the summer, the number of teens living at the X-Mansion increased, but despite the growth of the team the local chapter of the Brotherhood was undeterred to start shit once the school year kicked off. They ended up launching a terrorist attack on a local soccer game. After getting their asses kicked Xavier wiped all the minds of the civics so that the power of High School could correct the anti-social behavior of the teens.
Soon after, Jean's power started spiking up, causing her to unleash her psychic powers uncontrollably in the middle of the mansion. It was fun to deliver Rogue to her to drain off the excess power, but I don't understand how this was a permanent solution.
We made a game of completing High School and the four of us each had our own means to do it. Jack slept in all her classes, refused to do homework, and aced all the tests and quizzes for a C's get degrees approach. I used the time to study college textbooks Xavier was kind enough to provide for me to round out my education from pure tech and engineering focus to a full polymath. Kat played video games on a pad we made in Halo, and Linda actually attended High School like a normal High Schooler.
What a stone cold psycho.
We didn't have anything to do with the various X-Drama till Storm started getting tormented by a Shaman from Africa and I sensed my opportunity to clap them cheeks. I let the mother fucker bother her till her stress became readily apparent then offered my assessment and assistance.
After her nephew crept away from his eavesdropping I approached the pair of Storm and Charles in her room.
"If I may be so bold." I interrupted their discussion about sending Evan home to her sister, "Your nephew has nothing to do with what is going on right now."
"What do you know of what is happening with Storm?" Charles asked.
"Shaman magic." I sniffed the air, "I can smell it."
"You believe that this is a mystical attack?" Charles questioned.
"I am a master of two magic systems." I informed the man, and it was true with me finishing out my training in Skyrim magic while we were here and having started stealth training with Jack, "I can provide assistance."
"I'll gladly take it." Storm said almost pleadingly.
"Okay." I grinned and rubbed my hands together, "All we need to do wait for the next attack and I'll handle the rest."
"Then I bid you both a good night." Charles nodded his head and left us together.
I employed my old tried and true method of seduction. Asking her about herself. Not in a lame way like saying 'Tell me about you.' but by getting her to talk about a safe topic and listening to her response to form ever deepening questions. This process was briefly halted when the Shaman next attacked and with a quick application of demon magic I inflicted his exposed soul with a curse of agony. The man would never again feel anything but pain throughout his entire being and would kill himself within the next hour.
To those who doubt such a thing, I can only envy the pain free life you have led. True pain is crippling, maddening. Anyone who has bought the idea of the main character of a novel rising above true pain to deliver justice or whatever such nonsense is kidding themselves. It's a literary flex to make a protagonist seem cooler.
Pain can be so bad the bearer will believe amputation or death preferable.
Thank God I am a Krogan and my nervous system can completely block pain with just a little anger.
"And it's done." I grinned.
"So easily." She cocked an eyebrow.
"Some loincloth wearing shaman just tried to go against a master of Demonic magic." I chuckled, "Of course it was that easy. His primary method of casting involves sending his soul at his target. I could defeat him and a thousand like him just as easily."
"Thank you, Grunt." she smiled and gave me a relieved hug, "I don't know how I can thank you enough."
"I can tell you how, but that would be quite unseemly." I smirked.
"I think I know what you want." She grinned and stood up, sitting back down in my lap and grinding her huge round ass on me, "You've been staring at it like a dog since I first met you."
I grabbed her hips and smiled, "Let he who is not obsessed with this ass cast the first stone."
I stripped down after chucking her onto her bed.
"I am going to destroy you."
PERTIMBANGAN PENCIPTA
JManM
JManM
The next chapter will have the crossover with Does Voldemort Even Lift, Bro? play out. For those of you who haven't read Zugrian's story, go read it on fanfiction . net. I really can't recommend it enough.
I actually did a prewrite for a similar story I titled Harry Potter and the Hands of Stone, in which a young Harry would dream to grow up to be the heavyweight boxing champion of the world, only to have his dreams crushed at 13 (The AU age people go to Hogwarts at) when he realizes his body is such a temple because of magic, and all his amature wins are because of his magically enhanced athleticism.
Any way. I am always thrilled to see that I am not the only one left in this fading world who likes buff heroes beating the crap out of bad guys. Swimmer's body is now code for don't read this pathetic story.
Onto other news the next arcs are Mass Effect: Alter and Fate/Grunt and CO Fuck Shit Up. Both will include major life altering events, and Prepare to Cry for the Fate Arc cause not everyone is making it out and of those that do, some will never look the same again.
If you want to support me and my family and contribute to the weekend bonus chapter stockpile like SeekingRaven, you can do so at
ko - fi . com / jmanm
P.S. Mad props to SeekingRaven for dropping all those pictures in paragraph comments.
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