Bab 6: Desolate area and the giant grinning shadow
Five big black cargo trucks were traveling towards the frontline. It was in the eastern part of the Blue Nara Region.
The frontline.
If one looked at it from above, they would see that it resembles a sun with eight rays. It is a gigantic fortress that has protected the humanities for many decades now.
Many high-ranking soldiers were assigned here as it was the nearest to the border in which friction against the alien race was frequent.
They could easily send reinforcements if their armies on the border needed some assistance.
After an arduous trip, the students, together with some instructors and teachers, had finally made it to the frontline.
It took them a week-long to arrive. Most of the students had ashen faces when they climbed down the cargo trucks. They vomit and vomit while on the trip. If only they had known that it was this hard to travel inside the closed cargo truck, they would not have chosen to ride it.
Even Jem himself had an ashen face as the others. He wasn't the type of person who gets dizzy even though he wasn't used to traveling in cars.
But this time, Jem was not looking better than the others. Looking at the puking people around him made him want to puke as well.
The only regret he had was that he was not in the same truck as Desty on this trip.
"Everyone, come here!" A female teacher called out. She was together with the other teachers and instructor. Some people in military uniform were with them too. They were standing near what seemed like an entrance.
To make it more vivid. It was a gate.
The students moved sluggishly to where the teachers and instructors were. Out of all the students, only a few looked better. One of them was the two students that he never saw in the second evaluation exam.
On top of it, he knew the other one. It was the girl in the washroom, who took his first tooth. Before they departed, the other students were looking at them like they were the king and queen. But now, everyone was too exhausted to care.
Even Jem felt his head was about to break.
"Hey, toothless, move faster!" An annoyed yell came from his back.
For some reason, hearing it irritates him, especially now that his head was aching from a long ride. He wanted to give a smack on this fool. But since he was too weak to do it, Jem could only knit his brows. Out of reflex, he glanced behind him. But what greeted him was an angry face of a young man, who he knew.
It was a student from Class C. His name is Brad, short for Bradley. He was the one who popularized the nickname Toothless on him. Jem frowned.
After he looked behind, Brad yanked the collar of his shirt. "Slowpoke!" Then, he pushed him aside. Jem staggered and fell on his butt.
He could not prepare himself for that sudden assault as he was yet to regain his strength and he was slightly groggy. Though even if he had his peak, it was still uncertain that he could dodge it. After all, Brad was from Class C while he was in Class F. Not to talk about the gap in their stats.
After his fall, the mask on his mouth flew away and revealed the wide gap in between his teeth.
Brad and his friends in Class C laughed at Jem while calling him toothless or ugly.
He forced his body and crawled towards the masked. But before his hand could reach it, "Oi, where are you going?" Brad's friend stepped on it and spat.
The other students just glanced at them. But soon, they continued walking. They were too tired to mind others' business.
However, Brad's friend did not expect that Jem would pull his feet. Taken by surprise, the person had his balance wavered and fell to the ground.
Jem Hansen did not waste the opportunity. He leaped and mounted him. Then rain punches on the person's face.
He already had enough of these people. Even if he lost another tooth, it would not change his situation anymore.
So, for now, he wanted to take this person's tooth as well, to have a fill of his misery. Unexpectedly, he felt an inexplicable satisfaction as he did so. 'Hehe, this is great!' Jem thought inwardly with wide-eyes open. Just then, Brad and the others woke up from a daze.
Although Jem wasn't as strong as them, it didn't mean his punch could not injure. After all, they were still in the same rank. All of them were yet to advance. So even if Jem was weaker compared to the rest, his punch could still inflict damage on them.
Brad and the others tried to pull him off. But Jem struggled to free.
"Hey! What are you guys doing!?" One of the instructors seemed to notice them. He shouted at them and approached.
In the end, he woke up inside a cell. He was confined and needed to cool off. Before the instructor could come close, he felt a strong impact behind him that took away his consciousness. Which he suspected came from Brad.
Before he lost his consciousness, he also saw Desty not far from them. She was shaking her head while massaging her temple around her classmates.
Jem massaged the back of his neck. The joyfulness and satisfaction he felt while beating that bastard from Brad's circle only left him with bitterness aftereffect.
It must be what they called as--- conscience.
Jem felt guilty for what he did. He did it out of anger. He knew it wasn't only his fault but. But maybe the reason he felt so guilty was not because of what he did. Probably, it was because Desty saw him in unsightly behavior.
Jem, who was sitting on the bed, looked up. A white ceiling and a single lump in the middle that illuminates the room with white brilliance is what he saw.
But even though he was staring at the ceiling, his mind was beyond it.
"This is not good…"
"It was already two months and beyond, but still nothing changed…"
"Every day is only getting worse…"
"Coming to the academy might be wrong in the first place…"
Jem started to lose confidence and the will to continue.
"Even if I practiced three times harder than the rest, I still won't be able to catch up with them…"
"Maybe they were right. That I am a defective one."
"It isn't normal, that in fact, I am the only one with the weakest light."
"Right."
"I have decided."
While Jem was in deep thoughts, the door of the cell suddenly pulled open.
"Learn to forgive and control your emotions. Become a fine soldier and protect the world against the alien race. Or become part of the law enforcer and help to maintain the law of equality," said the counselor.
After leaving the cell, they brought him to a room for counseling. Sitting in front of him was unexpectedly the girl in the washroom. She was silently listening to the counseling. On his left, their adviser was giving some advice.
Although Miss Sylva was a good teacher, she was the same as the norm. She was one of those people who spoke about equality and how to become a responsible person.
"Sorry, Teacher, I think--- I can't go on. I will quit the Academy…"
"..."
Teacher Sylva fell silent. His reply was unexpected, "Why? Have you thought of it over and over?"
"I understand your circumstances. However, do you know that quitting the academy around this time is a big loss?"
"Teacher, I don't think the loss or gain is necessary for me at this point. I mean, it's already two months, and beyond but still, my improvement was so subtle. I have been thinking about it for so long now. And just recently that it made me realize that quitting the Academy is for the better. This whole time I was clinging to a little hope. That maybe if I persevere, there's a chance for me to become a better person in the future."
"But… I could not see it happening. My days in the Academy only worsened," Jem said with a shadow cast over his face.
"Erm!" Miss Sylva cleared her throat before starting her reply. "Hansen… stopped looking at the negative side. Your academy life is yet to reach the middle part. The difficult times are just in the beginning. Stop looking in the future and stay in the present. It will certainly help you to make a reasonable decision. Enjoy your academy life while you are at it."
Jem fell silent and sighed inwardly. It looks like Miss Sylva misunderstood him. 'Teacher, I have no future nor present in the Academy. I can only return to my past. To the farm, to where I live peacefully. With no one bothering me. Then, live my life till I grow old and die.'
'I don't care about the world, or do I care about the millions of people in it? I don't have that desire to become a hero. My only desire is to become a better person for the few people I care for.'
'But this Academy can't give it. It only makes my life worse.'
'That's why… I want to quit…' Jem confessed it, but in his mind only and did not voice out.
"Forget it, Aunt. I think he already has decided."
The girl in front of him, who was silent the whole time, had suddenly interjected.
"Also, the armies and Law Enforcers do not need weak-willed people," she added in a slightly cold tone after placing back the glass of tea on a small plate.
"Eh? F-Fate, don't say that. Uhm, Hansen, don't mind her. For now, rest in your chamber and try to rethink about it over and over."
'That's wrong, she's wrong. Knowing my limitations doesn't mean I'm a weak-willed person. I'm just honest to myself. It's better than persuading myself for the impossible,' he thought before leaving the room.
Jem followed his adviser's order and went to his room.
After he left, "Uhm, Fate, honey, don't you think that's a little rude saying like that to him? Haha..." Teacher Sylva inquired and laughed listlessly to her niece, Fate Margaret.
But Fate pouted as she looked away from her Aunt.
"Humph!"
Teacher Sylva sighed at her reaction. She was aware of why she said it. Fate Margaret dislikes a person with low self-esteem. "Please understand him. He has the lowest Exo points among all the freshmen. It must be the reason he's so modest."
"..."
She remained quiet.
She didn't care about that person. She was just annoyed at his negativity. And also, it was a little payback for seeing her in a half-naked state.
She was borrowing Class F's washroom at that time. And it was her aunt who recommended her to use it. Never she imagined that someone of the opposite sex would enter the girl's washroom. Is he an idiot? Thanks to her having more self-control if not, she would beat him to death.
Every morning, the students performed some work out in the training field. They did all sorts of exercise. However, everyone noticed that Jem had not joined them since the first day. There were different kinds of gossip regarding it. One of the popular ones was that he fell into an illness.
Because he was a person with bad luck and a terrible reputation in the Academy, he was quite infamous.
"Hey! Desty, do you know that the talk about Jem's absence is quite popular these days?" Wendy, who was stretching her arms beside Desty, informed.
"Huh?!" Annoyed, Desty raised her voice. "Why do you keep on minding someone else's business?" She added with a frown. "I mean… Aren't you worried about him?" Wendy asked with a smug face.
"Stop poking your nose in someone's business and focus on yourself. Regardless, I heard we are going to step into the desolate area next week. I also heard that fighting an actual beast can help us break through faster," Desty informed her.
Although she just wanted to change the topic, what she said was also true.
After their training, everyone formed a party to explore the desolate area.
The night before everyone explores the desolate area, Jem received an unexpected visitor.
It was Desty.
Jem was glad to see her. At least before he left the Academy, he could say his farewell in advance.
Desty did not expect what she heard. She asked him if it was because of her ignoring him.
Even though Jem already knew about it, it still surprised him. She explained that she just wanted him to become an independent person. It was her real reason for ignoring him. But in truth, there was another reason that she could not tell him.
She tried to stop him from his plan of leaving the academy and told him to join their party. She also said she was sorry for ignoring him this whole time.
But Hansen's reply was unexpected to her.
"Sorry, Desty, actually I didn't decide to quit the academy because of it. I decided to quit because I saw no improvement in myself. Maybe the Academy was not for me. Regardless, even if I quit, I hope for your success."
"Listen, Hansen! There's a chance to improve in the desolate area," she informed him with confident eyes.
"Desolate area?" He asked.
She then told him what she knew. "But I'm weak. And might drag the whole party down because of me," he responded in a sad, yet honest voice.
"Don't worry! I am here! If something happens, I will protect you!"
She kept on telling him that night that she would protect him. It made him so happy. Although skeptical, he agreed.
However, that shit happened.
Hansen was left alone in a desolate area. And now in a life and death situation.
Meanwhile, he was standing in a dark space. And in front of him was a giant grinning shadow.
The grinning shadow told him that he was his Guardian System. With the codename of The Trader.
Confused, Jem found himself at a loss of words.
"..."
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