For over a month, Xuan Yue had been tirelessly on the move, making this lunch her most sumptuous in recent times, with delectable dishes and fine wine.
A rose wine aged twenty years had just been opened, filling the entire dining hall with a rich, heady fragrance. At the very first whiff, Xuan Yue felt as though she were floating, already intoxicated by the aroma alone.
Licking her lips, Xuan Yue rose from her seat, snatching the bottle of rose wine from Bai Zhan Feng's hand. She brought it to her nose, savoring the potent scent and the pure, rich hue; one look was enough to recognize this as an exceptional vintage—indeed, age had only refined its depth.
"Old Bai, is this the only bottle you have?" Cradling the bottle like a cherished treasure, Xuan Yue gazed at Bai Ao with a playful smile. She was notoriously possessive, especially when it came to fine food and wine. Although this wine wasn't hers, she couldn't resist the urge to claim it entirely.
Bai Ao merely smiled, using his chopsticks without a word, while Bai Zhan Feng chuckled and attempted to reclaim the rose wine, only for Xuan Yue to elude him deftly.
"There are still a few more bottles. If we finish this one, I'll bring another." Bai Zhan Feng's face was alight with a rare warmth, far from his usual reproachful tone. Such generosity brought a smile to Xuan Yue's eyes as she remarked, "Well, Bai Zhan Feng, you're quite the generous host! Full marks!"
Instead of a wine cup, Xuan Yue handed a large bowl to Bai Zhan Feng. "Since Old Bai is in high spirits, join us for a hearty drink. Once we're full, rest here, and I'll have two big bottles sent your way."
Xuan Yue protested, "Bai Zhan Feng, I don't do well with small sips. Let me drink to my heart's content this time! I haven't had a drop for over a month, setting an example for others. The fragrance alone is driving me crazy!"
As she spoke, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath, looking utterly enraptured. Bai Zhan Feng could barely contain his reaction, while the attendants nearby struggled to hide their amusement.
"Leave us," Bai Zhan Feng commanded, waving the servants away. This uninhibited display was too undignified for others to witness.
"Feng'er, it's fine. Let her drink from the bowl," Bai Ao said with a smile. Xuan Yue grinned at Bai Ao and turned to Bai Zhan Feng, urging, "See? I was going to drink straight from the bottle, so I'm already showing restraint."
Helpless, Bai Zhan Feng poured her a large bowl of wine. Before he could hand it over, Xuan Yue had already risen, taking it from him. Without waiting, she lifted it to her lips, the rich aroma of roses mingling with the lingering warmth. Satisfied, she placed the emptied bowl on the table, licking her lips in contentment. The rose's delicate flavor, both soft and enduring, rivaled Lan Yi Xuan's plum wine; it had been so long since she'd tasted something this exquisite—one word: bliss.
"Xuan Yue, you certainly have a remarkable tolerance!" Bai Ao laughed, lifting his own cup. Watching her drink was infectious, making even the most restrained person feel the urge to indulge freely. In her company, all formalities seemed to fade, replaced by a sense of liberation.
"I've always had a strong tolerance." Xuan Yue laughed, handing the bowl back to Bai Zhan Feng with one hand, while with the other, she continued picking at the various dishes. Each nation had its own cuisine, and many of the dishes on the table were ones Xuan Yue couldn't even name. Yet the flavors were exceptional—likely due not to the chef's skill alone, but rather the particular tastes that suited her so well.
The state of Chu bordered the sea, with frequent rains and damp air. Due to the climate, people here enjoyed spicy foods, as spiciness could counteract the humidity. Among the six nations, the people of Chu were the heartiest when it came to spice, a preference that Xuan Yue shared. The warm burn of the wine, combined with the lingering heat of the spicy dishes, filled her stomach and left her feeling invigorated, almost euphoric.
With Xuan Yue present, even the largest bottle of wine would be too little. Inspired by her, Bai Ao also indulged in several more cups. Before the meal was over, a pleasant haze had already settled over him.
"Xuan Yue, I owe you a great debt," Bai Ao said, holding his cup. His face, lined and weathered, softened by a gentle intoxication, was stripped of its usual sharpness and seemed, for once, genuinely approachable. Gazing at Xuan Yue, a trace of guilt lingered in his eyes.
"When you fell from the cliff, I turned a blind eye. And yet, since then, I've asked for your help countless times. If not for you, our Chu state—and the entire Bai family—would have been lost long ago."
Bai Ao's voice was choked with emotion, and Xianyue could understand. She understood his attachment to Chu, his devotion to the Bai family. These words he spoke to her now weren't solely born of guilt; rather, they were the truths he had to share, things buried in his heart for too long, now slipping out under the influence of wine.
"You are a rare and admirable young woman. In all my years, I've encountered every kind of noble lady and demure maiden, yet only you have earned my respect. At such a young age, you are considerate, discerning, and capable of thinking for others. Though I watched Ruoxi grow up and always envisioned her as the Bai family's future matriarch, to be honest, she is no match for you. Ruoxi is gentle and virtuous, yes, but she lacks your broad-mindedness and cannot understand everything that crosses her path. She's insightful and intelligent, and that worries me."
With a sigh of apprehension, Bai Ao spoke of the concern that would later be proven true. Ruoxi's inability to forgive Xianyue and Bai Zhanfeng would eventually lead her to actions that almost brought disaster to the Bai family and those around Xianyue—a scar that would never truly fade.
Xianyue listened silently. She understood the meaning behind his words. He was now firmly on her side, hoping that if she one day rose to power over the Six Kingdoms, she would show Chu mercy and continue to support the Bai family. He wished for the Bai legacy to endure within her dynasty. As for Ruoxi, a woman she had never met, she trusted she must be refined and highly capable—Bai Ao wouldn't have chosen her otherwise. He was giving her a preemptive warning, hoping she would show Ruoxi kindness and tolerance. Yet magnanimity was not every woman's strength, particularly when it concerned one's husband. Love and relationships often brought out one's most selfish side. If Ruoxi harbored deep affection for Bai Zhanfeng, disliking Xianyue would be natural; even Xianyue wouldn't have managed to feel otherwise in her place.
Bai Zhanfeng looked at Xianyue, steadying Bai Ao's figure, but said nothing.
Suddenly, Bai Ao turned towards Bai Zhanfeng and patted his shoulder. "Feng'er, it is I who have wronged you."
Compared to his earlier words, this apology was weighted with a far deeper meaning.
As his grandfather, Bai Ao had always tried to consider his needs; from a young age, he had arranged for him to learn martial arts with Nian Tianba, knowing he disliked political intrigue. When he had reached mastery, he hadn't forced him to return to inherit the Bai family legacy immediately. He had done his best to fulfill Bai Zhanfeng's wishes, but in the end, duty had weighed heavier than dreams.
No one could bear to let such an ancient family perish in their hands, and Bai Ao, who had fought and sacrificed for it his whole life, was no exception.
"I know you resent me, that you hate me for binding you. But Feng'er, I am your grandfather. How could I stand by and watch you go to your death?"
By the end, his voice cracked. Though she wasn't privy to the details, seeing Bai Ao's expression, Xianyue guessed Bai Zhanfeng harbored a profound grudge towards him related to that incident in Death Valley.
Xianyue suddenly recalled the question Bai Zhanfeng had once asked her: would things have turned out differently if he had been the one to fall alongside her? If both he and Lan Yi Xuan had held onto her, would he have still had a chance? It was a question she still couldn't answer.
Perhaps, if it had been Bai Zhanfeng who had fallen with her, she might have felt gratitude enough to marry him; after all, he would make a far better husband than Lan Yi Xuan. But it wouldn't have been love. When Lan Yi Xuan fell with her, it hadn't been gratitude that moved her but shock—and a wild elation. She knew then she held different feelings for him, feelings she had fought hard to suppress.
It was understandable Bai Ao had made that choice; Bai Zhanfeng was his beloved grandson, his legacy bearer. Any person would have acted similarly in his place. And if Bai Zhanfeng resented him for it, that was only natural; emotions were often beyond reason.
Between love and duty, Bai Zhanfeng had chosen family. Yet, in doing so, he seemed to have abandoned both. Perhaps he now understood why Bai Zhanfeng had changed so drastically; perhaps, in the end, Bai Zhanfeng's heart had been extinguished.
"Feng'er, forgive your grandfather."
Watching the old man slumped in her arms, Xianyue guessed he rarely drank, certainly not enough to become this drunk. He must have wanted to find courage to bridge this rift with Bai Zhanfeng. In her memory, Bai Ao had always commanded respect, maintaining the authority of an elder with Bai Zhanfeng.
Bai Zhanfeng glanced at Xianyue, uncertain, with a hint of unease.
"Xianyue."
She offered a faint smile. "The old master has had too much to drink. Help him to rest and see he is well looked after. When you return, bring me a few more jars of his best wine—enough to make him wince."
Friendship may not mend the cracks left by love, but she hoped Bai Zhanfeng would learn to treasure this bond of family.
Bai Zhanfeng nodded, supporting Elder Bai as they left. Soon, he returned, placing several large jars of wine on the table.
"Xianyue, since we met, I've never truly had a drink with you."
Xianyue looked at Bai Zhanfeng, sensing that, like Elder Bai, he was weighed down by unspoken burdens. If drinking could coax these words out, letting him release what was trapped inside, perhaps it would do him good.
From Elder Bai's words, it seemed that the woman in question wasn't particularly generous. Today she wasn't here, thankfully. Xianyue didn't mind dealing with difficult people, but if the woman were her friend's wife, things could grow complicated.
However, regardless of who she was, she was Bai Zhanfeng's wife, the one destined to be his lifelong companion. So, no matter what, she wished for them to find harmony together. Perhaps true, unwavering love was unlikely, but mutual respect would suffice. She didn't want any rift between them caused by her, though it seemed unavoidable now. She certainly didn't intend to avoid Bai Zhanfeng either; that would only bring discomfort to them both.
Bai Zhanfeng had always been straightforward and loyal, never deceiving or using her, even standing up for her on multiple occasions. She truly considered him a friend. Yet, in these times, pure friendships between men and women were rare. Furthermore, Bai Zhanfeng had once openly declared to everyone that she was his.
Elder Bai's judgment was something she trusted, and if he had chosen Chen's granddaughter, she must be a wise person. But in matters of love, even the wisest can lose reason.
"Bai Zhanfeng, have I ever asked if you're happy?"
After finishing a large jar of twenty-year-old rose wine, Xianyue felt a bit light-headed. She didn't recall ever asking. That day, Bai Zhanfeng had come to ask if she was happy, though she knew he wasn't. In truth, neither of them was truly happy. But she didn't want him to hide behind empty words like she often did, claiming to be fine. She had congratulated him on his marriage to Chen Ruoxi, urging him to cherish this rare bond, knowing well it wasn't his true desire. Yet she had no choice; she hoped he would let go entirely and find happiness.
It may have been difficult to hear, perhaps even painful, but he couldn't deny Chen Ruoxi was now his wife. He, like Elder Bai, faced unspoken pressures.
"Isn't that true?" Xianyue pointed a finger at Bai Zhanfeng, laughing.
"In fact, that day when you asked if I was happy, I wanted to ask if you were too—but I held back. Because, honestly, you didn't look happy at all."
Xianyue spoke as she drank, letting the wine's bittersweet taste flood her senses, concealing the ache in her heart. She couldn't confide in her brother, knowing Lan Yixuan would feel the same pain, if not more. She had wanted to pour out her troubles to Bai Zhanfeng, to tell him her suffering was worse than his, but she restrained herself.
Bai Zhanfeng looked at Xianyue. He could tell she was tipsy, though he was not. He longed to drink himself into oblivion too, but ever since that time, he hadn't dared. One mistake had been enough; he feared that inebriation would only lead him to further missteps.
"Bai Zhanfeng, don't make this harder on yourself. You should feel fortunate that now, we're friends, not foes. Whatever may have transpired between you and Elder Bai, he's still your grandfather. Perhaps he's not your only family, but he is your closest and the one who cares for you most. You may think he's too harsh on me, but he's nothing to me—just a stranger. You might believe he sacrificed you for the Bai family, but this is your duty, just as it is his. He's endured countless difficulties he can never speak of. When he sees you suffering, it's certain that he suffers even more. That old man sees more than you realize; he could have chosen Xuan Yuan to mitigate Bai's risk, yet he still chose you. Everything he's done has been for you, whether you see it or not. Bai Zhanfeng, let go of the past, those endless grudges and loves—leave them where they belong. The only thing worth treasuring is the present."
The more she spoke, the more Xianyue's heart ached. Others could cherish the present, but what about her? Her current situation filled her with bitterness; there was no path forward, nor a way to retreat. Every direction brought pain, leaving her devoid of what she truly sought.
"When a tree wishes to be still, the wind never ceases; when a child wishes to be filial, the parent is gone. Bai Zhanfeng, Elder Bai has grown old. One day, when he's no longer here, all the regret in the world won't bring him back."
She wasn't cursing Elder Bai; she was merely stating an inevitable truth. Just as she now looked back on her time with Lan Yixuan, wondering why she hadn't cherished those early days, why they had always clashed, why they parted ways after Beijing.
Bai Zhanfeng's affection for Elder Bai was likely no less than his feelings for her. Otherwise, on the edge of Death Valley, no one could have held him back. A man like Bai Zhanfeng, driven by duty and honor, could not be restrained by mere responsibilities. After leaving Qiutian Mountain Villa, he had challenged various martial arts masters, not for fame but for Elder Bai. He didn't inherit the Bai family out of love but rather a deep unwillingness to let Elder Bai's life's work crumble.
"I understand."
Bai Zhanfeng gazed at Xianyue, her bright, tipsy eyes, clear and vivid, yet shadowed by a sorrow he couldn't quite decipher. They say wine loosens emotions, but strangely, despite his sobriety, he felt a sudden urge to weep.
Men rarely shed tears, but now he felt compelled, for he seemed to glimpse the sadness in her gaze, the turmoil hidden deep within. She wasn't nearly as happy as she appeared.
For the old master, indeed, he harbored resentment—not solely due to the incident at the valley's entrance, which had merely sparked the conflict. Growing up in the mountains, he'd embraced the frank camaraderie of martial circles, despising the scheming and hypocrisy he associated with the political world. Yet his grandfather persistently forced him to accept a reality he loathed, even pushing him to change who he was. He preferred life in the camp, surrounded by men of iron and straightforward hearts, where he felt truly at ease. But at home, with all those flattering visitors' faces, he found only vexation.
Xianyue nodded with a faint smile. "He's already given you a way back. I never thought the formidable Old Master Bai would show such a vulnerable side."
She blinked playfully, grinning as she recalled his tears. Bai Zhanfeng smiled too, feeling surprised—he'd never seen his grandfather like that. He understood his sadness, his struggle and pain, for he shared them; he was no better off.
"And make time to visit him. An old man's heart is lonely, after all. He longs for you to spend time with him. Even a brief visit would make him happy, you know?" Xianyue patted his shoulder. "Bai Zhanfeng, have we somehow switched roles? You've grown silent while I sound like an old nag. Oh, right—I seem to remember needing your help with something… but what was it?"
She rose, tracing circles in the air with her finger, trying to remember through the haze of drink.
"Xianyue, you're drunk. I've arranged a room for you. Let me help you down."
Bai Zhanfeng approached and placed a hand on her shoulder. She had certainly drunk too much at noon; the whole world seemed to spin.
"I don't need your help, Bai Zhanfeng. Let me tell you—I'm not drunk at all."
"Madam, please slow down."
Chen Ruoxi quickened her pace. Since yesterday afternoon, upon hearing that Xianyue's troops had arrived in Yecheng, she had felt restless, yearning to rush to the camp. But she had restrained herself, rising early that morning to visit the camp under the guise of delivering clothes, only to learn that Xianyue and her husband had already gone to Bai Manor. She hurried back, only to witness this scene: her husband supporting a woman inebriated, his usually cold eyes filled with an unfamiliar tenderness.
For a moment, she was dazed, glancing at the woman in his arms. Just as the rumors described, dressed in white, her brow adorned with a vibrant cinnabar mark. But far from the beauty she had imagined, Xianyue seemed little more than a coarse, uncultured woman. Yet her husband, undeterred, was patiently coaxing her. He barely acknowledged Chen Ruoxi, merely offering a dispassionate "You're back" as he continued on.
Chen Ruoxi turned, baffled. What charm could this vulgar, already married woman possess that bewitched him so entirely?
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