Kapitel 82: A Sleepover and a Story from the Past
"You know, Mahiru, your skin is so pretty."
Mahiru heard the faint sound of skin breaking the surface of the water as
Chitose submerged herself right in front of Mahiru and quietly mumbled
this compliment.
The bathtub, which was spacious when Mahiru was alone, felt a little
small with two people in it.
But Mahiru had gotten so used to Chitose's presence that being a bit
cramped felt cozy.
Chitose, who had come to stay over on the weekend, had wanted to take
a bath, so with no reason to decline, Mahiru had agreed. But even with
another girl, she didn't love the idea of being looked at.
The only reason she didn't feel too uncomfortable was probably because
the person looking was Chitose, who offered her pure admiration.
"Thank you very much. If it looks that way, I guess that means my
efforts are worth it."
There was no being modest in the bath, so Mahiru nodded and simply
accepted the compliment.
She was the type of person who was willing to put in the work and who
always held herself to a high standard, so naturally she took good care of
her skin.
Mahiru went out of her way to dress herself in clothes that were nice to
the touch and made of materials that were gentle on the skin. She believed
that a beautiful body started from the inside, so she paid attention to the
nutritional balance of her meals and made sure to get plenty of sleep. She
was careful not to get dehydrated or sunburned, and she avoided exposing
her unprotected skin to ultraviolet rays.
She always kept clean, and after washing gently and carefully in the
bath, not scrubbing too hard so that she didn't damage her skin, she applied
toners and lotions as well as oils after getting out, to lock in plenty of
hydration and stay moisturized.
By doing all that together, she kept her skin springy, smooth, and soft.
She couldn't slack off just because she was young. Beauty was
something deliberate, an ephemeral thing that could crumble away if she
didn't put in the effort. That was a lesson from her housekeeper, Miss
Koyuki.
Thinking about all the effort she put in, Mahiru accepted the praise as
well-deserved. Chitose's gaze made her a little embarrassed when it fell on
her face and her chest where it was sticking out of the water, as well as the
parts that were under the water's surface, but she wasn't going to rebuke her
friend for looking.
Still, she didn't like being stared at.
"…It's so smooth and milky white. I've got a little bit of a tan,
unfortunately. I'm jealous."
"I don't think you should be jealous. Sure, you've got more color than
me because you spend more time outside, but I think it's a healthy,
attractive color. If I got any paler, I'd look ill."
Chitose really did have a nice, healthy complexion, though unlike
Mahiru, she didn't make it her mission to completely avoid the sun, so she
wasn't so pale that her veins showed through.
Mahiru turned red if she ever got a lot of sun and went through hell until
it healed, which was why she was so cautious, so she actually felt slightly
envious of skin like Chitose's.
Chitose had called Mahiru pretty, but from Mahiru's perspective,
Chitose's lean, graceful figure was just as attractive.
Chitose had mentioned that she found it difficult to put on weight, and
Mahiru knew that Chitose exercised, but even so, to a girl like Mahiru, not
having to pay attention to calories despite eating a lot sounded like the
ideal.
"I know everyone wants what they can't have, but seriously I'm really
jealous of you, Mahiru. Of course, I'm sure that the upkeep must be a total
pain. No amount of effort on my part is going to change the skin color and
chest I was born with, I guess."
Chitose went on to bemoan the fact that her chest wouldn't get any
bigger no matter what she did, and Mahiru could do nothing but frown.
There were genetic factors at play, so Mahiru knew it wasn't her place to
say anything, and she thought that any comment would sound offensive,
since she understood what her own figure looked like.
She gently pinned down the bulges that felt a little lighter than usual
because they were underwater and let out a quiet sigh into the bathwater.
When it came to her chest, Mahiru was already well-developed, so she
didn't have much to complain about.
In fact, she'd had trouble figuring out the right size underwear once she
hit puberty. And she had had to put up with rude stares all through
elementary and middle school.
But that wasn't the sort of information that Chitose would find helpful.
"Itsuki's always making fun of me for it, can you believe that? I get
enough to eat, and they get massaged plenty, but they won't get any bigger,
so I don't know what else to do. I can't let him at them any more than I
already do, so I'm just gonna say it's his fault."
"I don't think you ought to talk about such things so openly!"
"It's just you and me, Mahiru, so no worries, no worries… Mahiru, you
can relax, you know. Guys usually like big ones."
"That is not relaxing information, and it's not necessarily the case that
Amane likes big ones!"
"I didn't say a thing about Amane, now did I?"
"Ah—"
"Okay, I get it, stop attacking me with your army of ducks!" Chitose
cried with a satisfied smile on her face.
When Mahiru vented her anger by shoving the ducks that were floating
on the bathwater at her, Chitose seemed to just enjoy herself even more.
Mahiru glared at her in irritation, but the smile on Chitose's face never
abated.
"You're awfully attuned to the preferences of the guy you like, huh?"
"…I think Amane is the kind of person who doesn't care about body
type."
"Sure, well, I think that he probably doesn't care once he already likes
someone, but even so, I'm pretty sure bigger is better. I don't think you
have to worry about that, though, Mahiru."
"…Amane is not that big of a pervert."
"I think that's your own fantasy, though, Mahiru. Amane's also a…well,
I guess more or less, he is still a guy."
"Aren't you being a little harsh?"
"Look at how he behaves himself."
Judging by his typical behavior, Amane was actually quite considerate,
and he seemed like the perfect gentleman to Mahiru, but within the confines
of the current conversation, that might not actually be ideal.
Chitose had once referred to Amane as someone who always erred on
the side of caution, and he certainly did seem to be a real worrywart to
Mahiru. But that was something she actually liked about him, and it didn't
bother her.
Though she did worry on occasion if she might be lacking a certain
appeal.
"…Anyway, leaving aside all this talk of boobs—"
"You're the one who brought it up, Chitose."
"Yeah, yeah. Anyway, you sure are pretty, Mahiru. I mean it. White as
an egg, you could say. How nice, to be smooth and springy and moisturized
and glossy and supple!"
"I think you're describing an egg, or maybe some kind of gelatinous
material?"
"Aren't you already jelly? You're ridiculously soft…how do you keep
this skin so moisturized?"
"I usually use toner, lotion, and oil. If you want, you could give it a try,
too, Chitose? Though I don't know whether it will be right for your skin."
The skin-care products Mahiru used cost quite a bit of money, and they
were all very high quality. But that didn't necessarily mean they were
compatible with someone else's skin. It was a matter of individual
physiology, so it wasn't necessarily true that the products Mahiru used
would be good for Chitose. But she could try them and go from there.
"Could I? Beauty Salon Mahiru is open for business?"
"It's not that big of a deal. You just smear it on and then massage it in;
you can do it yourself. I'm sure you don't want me putting my hands all
over you."
"Wait, but I'm just fine with touching you and getting touched by you,
Mahiru. Actually, I want to touch."
"…Where are you planning on touching?"
Chitose's gaze shifted down to Mahiru's body, so she quickly covered
herself with both arms, but Chitose cackled with laughter and waved a hand
in front of her.
"Just joking, just joking. Of course, if someone's touching you, that'll be
Amane, right?"
"…Chitose."
"Heh-heh, you can't frighten me, not with that bright-red face. You just
end up looking cute instead… I get it already, stop glaring at me!"
"And just whose fault is that?"
"Yeah, yeah… But seriously, in a way, it's really impressive that Amane
can pull himself away without letting anything show on his face, when you
squish these things against him."
"It's not like I've been squishing them against him on purpose, though."
"Uh-huh, I've watched you do it and seeing that made me think you're a
natural seductress."
"It's not natural, either."
"Sure, sure, whatever you say."
Chitose's knowing grin pierced Mahiru's heart, so even though she
wanted to object, Chitose didn't seem likely to hear what she had to say.
She formed her face into a discontented pout, but that only made Chitose
smirk even harder.
There was no way she could hold her own against Chitose, so Mahiru
stopped trying to hide and let out a big sigh.
"Well, Amane never makes a move unless he gets a push, so I think
you're doing the right thing, putting the pressure on. I think you'll be happy
with the results if you keep on pushing until you see the wolf inside."
Just as Mahiru was thinking it was about time to get out of the bath,
since she was feeling flushed from Chitose teasing her about all sorts of
things that she didn't consider to be joking matters, Chitose spoke to her not
in a teasing manner, but in a gentle tone of voice.
I don't think that Amane has got a wolf inside him…
She did actually think that Amane was someone with wolflike qualities,
but not in the way Chitose was thinking.
Wolves are devoted creatures that care for members of their pack and
form strong bonds with their mates.
A person who was kind and thoughtful to the very end once you were in
his circle—that was Mahiru's impression of Amane.
Thinking about how she wished she could form that kind of bond with
Amane, she retrieved the skin toner that she had laid out, rubbed it in her
hands, and slid it over her body.
She wasn't quite out of the bath yet. Before stepping into the changing
area, before drying herself with a towel, the first task in her skin-care
routine was to lock in the generous amount of moisture that her skin now
held, so she spread on the toner carefully.
"…Even supposing that he did turn into that wolf you're talking about, I
think Amane is the type of guy who would kneel and beg forgiveness
afterward."
"Ah-ha-ha, you're not wrong! He would definitely take responsibility."
"…Gradually chipping away at things isn't exactly my ideal, so I
wouldn't be too unhappy about it."
"You wouldn't? So you mean you'd be kind of happy to get gobbled
up?"
"I'm not loaning you any skin-care products anymore."
"I'm sorry, I'm sooorry!"
Chitose got out of the bathtub with a big grin on her face as Mahiru gave
her a warning in a slightly sharp tone of voice. Mahiru sighed again and
passed Chitose the bottle of toner.
After properly completing their skin-care and hair-care routines, Mahiru
and Chitose changed into their pajamas and were finally able to relax in the
bedroom.
Mahiru had been unable to relax in the bath because of Chitose's direct
and intrusive interrogation. But Chitose must have sensed Mahiru's subtle
signs of mental exhaustion, because she was deliberately not paying
attention to her and was instead smiling at herself. "My skin is so much
smoother than usual!"
Chitose was wearing a gray sweatshirt and shorts. She sat cross-legged,
happily rubbing her legs where they stuck out from her shorts.
"Wow, I feel like a twelve out of ten today!"
"That's great. I think you'd get an extra point if you corrected your
posture, though."
"Man, you're so strict. You never sit like this, do you, Mahiru?"
"If I did, you'd totally be able to see my underpants."
Chitose was the type to wear shorts, but Mahiru had on a nightgown
with long sleeves and a hem down to her ankles.
Even though it was fluttery and had plenty of space to spare, it wouldn't
be enough for her to sit cross-legged, and if she did, she would have to hike
it up, and that would be far too immodest.
Instead, Mahiru sat with both legs slightly to one side, and Chitose
looked at her with what seemed to be admiration.
"You've got a lot of pajamas like that, huh, Mahiru? I think they're cute,
but my big brother would laugh at me and tell me they're all wrong for me,
I'm sure."
"Can I just say, I think it's all right to let things that people with no tact
tell you pass right in one ear and out the other?"
"Oh, harsh! You're really hard on my big brother, aren't you? Though I
guess he did make fun of Amane, so I get why you wouldn't like him."
Chitose smiled and explained that he had been teasing them out of
affection and not malice, but Mahiru couldn't conjure much in the way of
good feelings when she recalled meeting Chitose's brother. Previously,
when they had gone over to Chitose's house to hang out, she had heard one
of her brothers saying insulting things about both Chitose and Amane, so
Mahiru could never see herself liking that older brother.
As far as Mahiru was concerned, he had made fun of two of her dearest
friends, so it was impossible for her to like him.
Deep down, she could have found a way to ignore him making fun of
Amane, because he didn't really know him. But the things he'd said about
Chitose were a different matter.
She knew that Chitose's older brother had only used such indelicate
words toward Chitose because they were family, but even so, there were
things that were okay to say and things that were not. Chitose always
laughed and said she was used to it, but even she had to be hurt by it.
It was unthinkable that Mahiru would hold any goodwill toward a
person who could misjudge that.
"…If I had to say, the thing I disliked about him was the way he treated
you, Chitose. And that he laughed at you after making fun of you."
"Huh? …Well, let me just say in his defense that I like my big brother,
and he's got good points, too, okay? That said, he is the type to run his
mouth without thinking and then feel bad after saying something uncalled
for. After you went home, he came and apologized to me."
"Even so, you seemed so sad when he was saying it, so I can't allow it. I
think your brother must have something wrong with his eyes. You're cute,
Chitose. No matter what anyone says. I guarantee it."
Mahiru looked straight at Chitose as she made this declaration,
unwilling to concede that point. Chitose looked puzzled but happy, and her
face curved into a smile.
"…You think I would look all right in a cute, fluttery thing like that?"
"I think it would suit you just fine. You should let me dress you up from
time to time. Let's throw your Mr. Akazawa for a loop."
"Good idea! I like the thought of shocking Itsuki."
Chitose looked adorable when she wore her easygoing smile. That alone
was enough to convince Mahiru that what her friend's brother said must be
wrong.
Chitose threw her arms around Mahiru with a gentle smile, and Mahiru
found herself smiling as well. She chided Chitose to cut it out but let her do
as she pleased.
"Mahiru, Mahiru, let's go buy matching pajamas together soon!"
"Sure, that's no problem."
When Mahiru readily agreed, Chitose's smile changed.
Mahiru had felt reassured by her friend's usual cheerful grin, but looking
at this new smile gave her a bad feeling for some reason.
"Whoo-hoo! You already agreed, so now you have to let me dress you in
a sheer negligee!"
"Hang on?! If we're matching, that means you have to put it on, too, you
know?!"
"Yeah, that's fine. Of course, I'll only wear it in front of Itsuki, though.
What will you do with yours?" Chitose leered in satisfaction.
Mahiru reflexively slapped at Chitose's thighs.
Chitose was still clinging to her, so she couldn't rip her away by force,
and smacking her was her only recourse. But Chitose didn't seem to mind.
"But I'm sure it'll look great on you, Mahiru! I bet you'll transform into
a sweet little temptress."
"Isn't that a contradiction?"
"If it is, then you're going to embody it."
"Who do you think I am?"
"You're my sweet, lovely Mahiru!"
"…Geez."
Chitose seemed to think that calling Mahiru "sweet" and "lovely" was
enough to earn her forgiveness. Mahiru slapped Chitose on the thigh once
more, then in order to drive the image she had briefly conjured of wearing a
negligee in front of Amane from her mind, she threw herself to the floor,
Chitose and all.
"…Come to think of it, how did you and Akazawa wind up dating,
Chitose?"
They had turned off the room's overhead light and just had the side lamp
on, gradually getting ready to sleep, when Mahiru hit Chitose, who was
lying beside her, with a question that she had been curious about.
Chitose was always elated to gossip about love interests when she stayed
over, but surprisingly, she had never thought to tell Mahiru her own story.
Illuminated by the faint lamplight, Chitose snapped her eyes open and
shut dramatically several times.
"Me? I don't think it's all that interesting of a story, and if anything,
there's probably some parts that will make you uncomfortable."
Chitose had already been dating Itsuki when she met Mahiru, and she
always talked about how close they were now, but she rarely said anything
about the past.
Mahiru had raised the question because she realized that she hadn't
expressly asked about it before, but Chitose didn't seem to want to
volunteer the story.
"I'm not exactly hiding anything, but…hmm. Well, I guess it would be
unfair not to tell you, since I'm watching your romance grow."
Chitose let her gaze drift around, looking not displeased but rather
unsure how to explain. Somehow or other, Mahiru could tell that this
behavior was something she did when she was remembering.
"Just know that it's not the sweet story you're expecting, all right,
Mahiru?"
"…As long as you don't mind telling it."
"Okay. Mm, how do I put this, I feel so embarrassed just thinking about
things from way back then. So before I was dating Itsuki, right? And I can
see my old self from an objective point of view now, but I was dull, I guess
you could say, and pretty bad at getting along with people. I wasn't
interested in anything but running. You know, that kind of person. And I
was always fighting with my brothers, so I'd say I wasn't a super-charming
girl.
"Hard to imagine, huh?" Chitose said a bit sadly when she saw Mahiru,
who was stiff as a statue, struggling to picture it.
The Chitose of the present was cheerful and friendly with everyone. She
was always smiling and seemed to be loved by everyone around her.
The Chitose of the past that she was describing sounded like her
complete opposite.
"So that's why I was always hated by this one group of upperclassmen
in my track club, see? Especially after I snatched one of the regulars'
positions. Their jealousy…I guess it was unavoidable, and it's not like I was
rude to them or looked down on them or anything, but there's only so much
you can do in school. It's a microcosm of society, after all. 'The nail that
sticks out gets hammered down' and all that."
Mahiru had had a similar experience.
For better or worse, Mahiru had always stood out in all sorts of ways
thanks to her hard work and the talents she was born with. As someone who
had also experienced envy and jealousy, she sympathized deeply.
In Chitose's case, people were jealous of her physical prowess.
"On top of all that, Itsuki had to go and confess his love for me. One of
the upperclassmen who held a real grudge against me apparently had it bad
for Itsuki, too. At first, I didn't really know Itsuki at all and had never
considered dating him, so I turned him down, but even though I rejected
him, from that point on, that upperclassman's harassment got really bad."
Chitose was telling the story now with a smile on her face, but at the
time, it must have been a terrible ordeal.
"I told him I loved running, and turned him down, and I thought that
was the end of it, but that upperclassman didn't like my attitude. She didn't
give up on Itsuki, either, so the harassment escalated in all sorts of ways,
you see?"
"That's…"
"Even so, I put up with it, but well, ultimately, the upperclassman
resorted to violence. Up until then, everything had always been indirect, but
that time she directly… I suspect that she herself probably didn't mean for
it to go so far. In the middle of practice, she deliberately injured me."
Without meaning to, Mahiru mumbled something about the situation
transcending a simple interpersonal disagreement.
"Well, without talking to an adviser, I don't think I'll ever know,"
Chitose answered with a bitter smile. Her reaction wrenched Mahiru's
heart.
"I injured my leg, the most important thing for running track, and was
removed from the roster right before a competition. Well, I felt like I had
lost my reason for living, like I had lost the place where I belonged. I was
so upset I skipped out on the hospital and was out there staring blankly at
the sports field when Itsuki came up to me to apologize. 'It was my fault,'
he said… It wasn't his fault at all, of course. It was all because of that
upperclassman, who was lashing out at me. I knew that, but still, in some
corner of my heart, I did think it might have been because Itsuki had
confessed his feelings for me. I was too ashamed of myself for thinking
such a thing, and I cried right there in front of Itsuki, can you believe it?
After crying for a while, I asked him: What did he see in me? He told me
that he loved my form when I was running, but I knew I might never again
be able to run like I had before."
In sports, a serious injury can make it quite difficult to make a
comeback, Chitose explained.
Even supposing that she received flawless medical treatment, her muscle
strength would decline due to the gap in her training. It wasn't clear
whether she would be able to run like she had originally, and even if she
did, it would take even more time.
Thinking realistically, it made sense that she would be removed from the
team roster while she was recovering, but from Chitose's perspective, it had
been a big enough shock that she'd felt as if she had lost her place in the
world.
But the expression that Chitose wore as she told the story could hardly
be called gloomy.
Far from it, the look in her eyes was one of nostalgia, mixed with what
could only be described as tender affection.
"Then Itsuki said, 'It doesn't matter. I love what I love.' He was so darn
direct and honest, I stopped crying before I knew it."
"…He's very passionate."
"Well, if he didn't really like me, he would never have approached me
after I brushed him off, right? Itsuki's bad at giving up when it comes to
things like that. Honestly, he's so straightforward and serious… Ultimately,
I guess you could say I was moved by his affection. When he said that he
loved me so earnestly, it didn't feel weird at all, and I guess that must be
why."
Chitose scratched her cheek awkwardly, then brushed back the hair that
was hanging over her face and slowly cast her eyes downward.
"So like I told you, in the beginning it wasn't pure love like what you
have for Amane. If you want to put it in a mean way, I was just swept off
my feet and accepted it. Of course now I'm totally in love with him… Do
you look down on me for it?"
"No… The path to romance is different for every person, and love takes
many forms. No matter what started it, as long as you and Itsuki are in love
with each other now and cherish each other, I think that's great."
To Mahiru, relationships were connections that bound together people
who loved one another, and she thought that people's fates could not be
linked by one-sided affection.
But she also knew that that was not all there was to it.
Chitose had left out the details of how she and Itsuki had connected in
the way she told her story, but Mahiru could tell they had taken a different
path than the way she imagined most couples were formed.
Mahiru had no intention of invalidating her friend's experience and
accepted it for what it was.
The most important thing to her was whether Chitose was happier now
than she had been in the past.
When Mahiru slowly shook her head, Chitose smiled slightly, looking
relieved, then casually turned over to face the ceiling and extended her
arms. She slowly clasped her palms together in the air, as if there were
something between them.
"…After I quit the track club, I tried to change myself. I decided to learn
more about the big wide world, not just running. I gained worldly wisdom.
It was out of self-interest, but people have a better impression of you if
you're smiling, and they're kinder, so that's how I made friends. I had been
paying the price for neglecting my relationships with other people, so I tried
extra hard."
She turned a touching gaze on Mahiru, a gaze that seemed to say I'm
sure you understand perfectly well what that's like, Mahiru.
"Well, anyway, that's the story of how me and Itsuki got to where we are
today. Not really the nicest story, right?"
"…Setting aside the question of whether or not it was pleasant, I'm a
little surprised to hear that Akazawa was so persistent."
"Heh-heh-heh. I may have changed a lot, but Itsuki's also changed, you
know? Thanks to his family's education plan, he used to be way too serious,
if anything—a real model student. Though you've seen what he's become,
now that he's mixed up with someone like me."
"…You shouldn't put yourself down like that."
"This is one point I won't budge on… It's only natural that Daiki would
hate me, you know, considering how the serious son he raised so carefully
ended up changing after meeting me," Chitose mumbled quietly, her words
probably not meant for Mahiru to hear. Her voice had a faint, sad tremble to
it.
Mahiru had picked up on the fact that there was a gulf between Chitose
and Itsuki's father, but it seemed to be deeper than she had assumed.
As an outsider, Mahiru couldn't readily fill in that gulf or build a bridge
across it.
But what she could do was snuggle up to her friend.
Mahiru gently brought her body closer, until she could no longer see
Chitose's face, and put her forehead against the other girl's arm.
"…Well, I like you, Chitose," she whispered quietly.
The body she was holding on to shook just a little.
"Eh-heh-heh, thanks. I like you, too, Mahiru."
In a sort of embrace, Chitose curled up against Mahiru's chest, but just
this once, Mahiru didn't prevent it and let Chitose do as she pleased.
"Oh-ho-ho, I'm the first person to enjoy Mahiru's softness."
"…Not necessarily—"
"Huh?! What's that mean, gimme details!"
"That's a secret."
"Oh, come on, that's not fair!"
They horsed around for a bit, and as she felt Chitose's warmth seeping
into her arms, Mahiru slowly closed her eyes.
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
-- Power-
Rangliste 
-- Power-
Stein