Chapter 15: THE TRUTH IS
James Danvers
I stand beside Cass frozen. None of this was supposed to happen. No one was supposed to know yet. How did so much go wrong so fast?
"Cassidy, I think that you should go now."
"Oh, are you sure because I can stay and help you talk to…"
"I'm sure. I don't need you to look over my decisions as a mother."
Cass looks at me and I nod my head telling her mom is right. She kissed me on the cheek and walked around and out the door.
"Mom I .."
"Not another word."
She walks to the steps and stops just short of the first step.
"Girls come down here now!"
I hear the door open and soon after Kiki and Z walk downstairs.
"All three of you sit down."
I try to sit next to Z but Kiki manages to wiggle her but in between us. I can tell Kiki isn't exactly happy with me either.
"I want someone to tell me what is going on. Now."
All of us sit silently. Waiting for someone else to speak for us. My mom doesn't look angry but she doesn't look very happy either.
"Everything is true," Z says "I'm pregnant and that picture is mine."
The room goes silent. No one says anything for a few minutes.
"Did the both of you know about this?"
Kiki and I both nod our heads.
"Let me guess you don't know who the father is?"
"No ma'am."
She's lying? But why? After everything that just happened she was still willing to lie for me. I can't let her take the brunt of it. I have to say something.
"She's lying."
"What?"
My mom looks at me confused.
"Are you saying she does know who the father is?"
"Yes she does"
Her head turns back to Zarah but before she can say anything I have to instead.
"It's me mom. I'm the father."
I wait for her to yell at me. Scream. Do something. But instead she just sits. Like her anger is slowly brewing.
"Kiki, go to your room and give us some time."
"Ok mom."
Kiki gets up and walks up to her room. I have no clue what is coming next.
"When did you first find out?"
"About 3 days ago."
"You took a test?"
"Yes, both a drugstore one and a blood test."
Mom takes a deep breath.
"James, why didn't you tell me?"
"Z and I thought that it might be better to wait to tell you and her dad."
"That's the worst idea you've ever had."
My mom sighs and places her thumb and forefinger on the bridge of her nose.
"So what's the plan?" She asks as she removes her fingers from her face.
"I want to keep it."
Mom looks up and directly at Z. She stands from her chair and walks toward Z. She kneels next to her and looks into her eyes.
"Are you sure about this? You still have a few weeks to change your mind."
I turn to Z to see how she will respond. SHe slowly nods her head. Confirming what I already thought she was going to say.
"Ok. If that's what you want to do then I won't stop you."
"You won't?" I questioned.
"Well it's her body James so at the end of the day it's her choice of what she wants to do. Plus I'm not your legal guardian so I can't take control or anything. But I will support you in any way possible. If you need a ride to appointments, advice on issues or anything else, just let me know. I will happily answer what I can."
I watch as Z's eyes fill with tears. Mom opens her arms and leans toward Z, slowly enveloping her in a tight hug. After a few seconds mom backs up and then begins to stand up. She brushes off her lap as she stands up the rest of the way.
"I have to get something from my room. If you would like, when I come back I can take you home Z."
"I think she might…"
"That's ok. My car is outside. I drove myself."
Damn she must really be mad at me. She has never cut me off mid sentence like that before. Mom nods her head and then walks up the steps. Z wipes her eyes, stands up, and begins to move toward the door.
"Z please wait."
"Why should I?"
"Because I want to talk to you."
"Talk to me? About what. About how you let your girlfriend insult me? How you let her think I'm a slut? Or how you sided with her saying I should have used protection and didn't even think about telling her that this kid is yours!"
"I did think about it!"
"Then why didn't you say anything!?"
I shut my mouth and stare at her. The truth is I don't know. I don't know why I didn't say anything. Or why I even sided with Cass in the first place. Was it because I'm not ready for her to know the truth? No, that's not it. The purpose of this date was to tell her the truth.
"I can tell you why. No matter how many times you say it, deep down in your heart you don't care about me or this baby."
I open my mouth to speak but her hand shoots up signaling me to not say another word.
"You want me to believe that you care. I don't know why that is. What I do know is you're just an asshole who thinks that you can say and do whatever you want without any form of pushback. That's not the case. You have been living in a dream world for years. I fell right into it by falling for you. No matter how hard I try I can't stop these feelings that I have for you and I don't know if I ever will be able to. But I won't stand here trying to hope that the father of my child wakes up to face reality and realizes that he will never truly care about the mother of his child and that we will always come second to whatever girl you are with in the moment."
Her voice shook with her last words. Ending with that she walked out and slammed the door behind her. Damn it, I majorly screwed up this time. And I have no clue how to fix it.
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