Chapter 1: How a Great Man Dies
The sound of footsteps echoes through the halls of an old castle, as an old one eyed man makes his way towards the room where his old master resides.
The man opens the door and enters what seems to be a ballroom where a party is being held.
"So you finally accepted my invitation" a calm accented voice calls from the side
The old man turns his head to the side to see his former master, in all his glory. Looking as young as the day he met him… the day he enthralled him.
"I am at the end of my days" the old man replies "I thought now would be a good time to say my goodbyes, apologies and thanks" he shrugs
"And which of those do you bring to me?" the party host asks, as all eyes are now focused on the two men
"All of them. Thank you for helping me with that Japanese vampire Toru, apologise for leaving you the way I did and to say goodbye as I haven't much left to live" the old man spoke as he smiled bitterly
The man called master frowned "Xander… you know I-"
"No" the now identified Xander interrupted "I lived my entire life as a normal man, I will die a normal man" he then turned to leave "I already lost everyone I care about and the only thing keeping me going is my stubbornness" he then turned to meet the eyes of his former master Dracula one more time "and I have but one more goodbye to say"
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If you ask an average person that went to high school with Xander Harris to describe him in a single sentence, they would most likely say Xander Harris is the butt of every joke or that he is a clown or whatever else in that context.
If you ask someone from the Scoobies, they would say he is the doughnut guy, the distraction or the comic relief.
However, if you ask the demons of hell, they would describe him as a pain in the ass, the bane of their existence or simply a brave warrior.
What many don't understand is that when the spotlight is on the hero in the shining armor, no one looks towards the knight carrying the chipped axe. Everyone looked towards Buffy the chosen slayer, or willow the powerful magician, but not Xander the comic relief.
They never noticed Xander the man who took hits from vampires that can dent metal and stood up again.
They never noticed the man that magic seams to simply not work on.
They never noticed the man who broke every prophecy he came across.
And they defiantly didn't notice how in every situation where they are helpless, he saved the day with his 'wacky' plans.
Not even Xander.
Xander's life was not easy by any means. His parents were alcoholics and abusive. It was so bad that he had to steal from his father's wallet to eat or purchase clothes or other school supplies.
When he started school he met his best friends for life, or so he thought at the time, Willow and Jessie. They were the 'losers' and Xander liked it that way, no chance of snobs or boyfriends/girlfriends getting in the way.
Xander had to mature quicker than his friends, so he found solace in the fact that he can be as immature around them as he needs to at least have a semblance of childhood. His favourite were the sleepovers as Willows parents went on long trips for their work so Xander stayed with her.
She was not alone and Xander was not with his 'parents'. It's a win-win situation.
As Xander didn't think collage was something he can afford, he never really tried in school, despite Willow trying her best to convince him otherwise, and so he never did well in his studies. The years went by as Willow became the class nerd and Xander and Jessie the class clowns.
This continued till Buffy Anne Summers walked into their life. The first time Xander saw her he fell off his skateboard and face planted at the entrance of the school.
Hey, he was a teenage boy and a cute ten outa ten blond in a miniskirt walks in front of him. his brain just lagged a bit.
However, it didn't take long to find out there is more to this blond than distracting legs.
For some reason, this petit blond high school girl is a chosen slayer of vampires. And not the sparkly kind that Willow loves either. They are more like the blood demon kind.
It is when he killed his first vamp that he swore he'll kill them all… except for Angel… and Spike… and master Dracula… shut up
Anyways
The adventures had them fighting everything from vampires to demons to gods. It was a new world ending event every week and a new enemy every day.
This continued day in and day out. But at the end of the day his girls were always there so it was ok, until it was not. Tara, Willow's girlfriend, was the first to die.
To this day, Xander wonders if letting Willow reset the world in her fit of rage was the right choice, because it didn't get better. Faith, Anya, Renee, Willow, Cordelia, dawn and Buffy, all died because of one demon or another. They died because of some catastrophe or another... they died because he couldn't protect them.
He was the only one normal. The average man among demi-gods.
Willow's Magic can destroy entire dimensions.
Dawn has enough power to unlock hell.
Faith, Renee and Buffy are slayers. That means strong enough to punch a steel plate full of holes.
Yet the one 'normal' man outlived them all.
Xander hated it. Why do the people he loves die while he lives, only to be told he will die in a month at the age of sixty.
The worst part is that it isn't magic, a curse or a demon that will kill him.
It was cancer
What a cruel joke fate is playing on him. So he did what any man that went through the things he did and came out sane… mostly sane… somewhat sane… never mind
He did what HE would do in such a situation. He went around and said goodbye to the people and 'other' he knew and then went to Wolfram & Hart.
"What can we do for you, Mr Harris?" asked the pretty blond receptionist that Xander was almost perfectly certain weren't a human.
Wolfram & Hart is a law firm that uses magical contracts to enslave its employees. It was created by the three demons Wolf, Ram and Heart. It is basically a law firm for demons to 'legalise' their assets.
But that is not why Xander was here "I need to see the PTB"
"Sorry sir, I don't know what you mean" the Blond responded
"You called me Mr Harris even though I never came here before" Xander indicated "Tell them their pain in the ass is here"
"Again sir I-" whatever she was about to say was interrupted by the phone ringing
She answered the phone paused and then hung up "Please proceed to elevator 3" she spoke with the same smile
"Gotcha" responded the smiling old man Xander as he moved to the elevator.
---
It took a minute but eventually the elevator door opened to reveal a white room with ivory pillars. Xander stepped out of the elevator and walked down the hallway till he reached a room with seats spread around it. The room reminded him of the meeting room of organisation 13 from kingdom hearts.
Sitting on it were beautiful beings, perfect in every way and to Xander, filled with faults.
"We care not what a lesser being believes. Why are you here mortal?" a voice echoed in the room
"You can read my mind, but can't tell why I'm here?"
"Speak" the voice echoed again
"uh… Powers That Be, I have come to bargain" Xander spoke with a smirk
An amused voice responded "What have you to offer US beings of unimaginable power, and what do you wish in return"
"Oh that's simple, I want you to not take humanities free will away from them and for all my friends to go to heaven" Xander shrugged "even the ones not dead yet"
"But not you?" a female voice asked. Xander couldn't tell who as none of them moved
"I fought demons all my life, if I don't go to heaven for it, nothing will get me in"
An amused snort echoed in the chamber "and what have you to offer in return?"
Xander pulled a small box from his coat "This" Xander opened the box to reveal a notebook. It looked old and fragile but that was not the most important part about it. The most important part is that it containes the method to creating M? A.K.A the Scythe. A weapon created by the guardians to fight the Old Ones.
The Powers That Be took a moment, and then the box in Xander's hand vanished in a bright flash.
"We have an accord" a voice echoed in the chamber
"Great" Xander then turned to leave but paused "Oh, before I forget, I have a powerful vampire as a friend, his name is Dracula, and you might know him…"
Xander could feel the tension in the room. Dracula is well known to be an enemy of the PTB. So much so, they tried numerous times to guide the various slayers to fight and kill him. Now they need to let him into heaven…
"Don't worry so much. I mean, he is immortal. He will live forever unless 'someone' kills him" Xander smirked, then turned and started walking away, leaving one sentence to hang in the air
"That's for giving me cancer, Bitch"
The room was quiet after, but one particular member of the PTB was feeling a lot of attention on him.
---
How does a great man die?
A good man dies with a smile on his face as he did his best and led a good life. He did good deeds to himself and others. He welcomes death as a friend as he did all he can.
A bad man dies with a frown on his face as he did his worst but it was not enough. He didn't get enough, he wants more from life and he can't accept death, he fears death as after death he can take no more.
So how does a great man die?
Is it in the blaze of glory at the heart of a battle for the salvation of the realm?
Is it in a quiet room where he is alone, peacefully in his sleep?
Or is it, maybe, just maybe, that the great never truly die? Maybe they are just not there anymore, but simply took residence in our heart.
No one truly knew where Xander Harris went after that day. It was as if he never existed. He was neither in Heaven nor any Hell. That being said there's one thing's for sure:
many will remember Xander Harris as a major pain in their butt.
CREATORS' THOUGHTS 
Silver_Call
Silver_Call i know, i know
Silver, WTF, another one? finish the first two first (╬▔皿▔)╯
no ￣へ￣
but why? (╯︿╰)
cause i suck ಥ_ಥ
we know (¬_¬ )
yeah well, fuck you (╯‵□′)╯︵┻━┻
put that back (ﾟДﾟ*)ﾉ
yes sir (ヘ･_･)ヘ┳━┳
good boy, now do better (￣、￣)
but i have classes ...(￣０￣)ノ
did i stutter (＃°Д°)
no sir sorry sir <(＿ ＿)>
good now go on (￣_,￣ )
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intro to my mind and posiblly how you look right now -> ಠ_ಠ