Chapter 17: 16

I sighed, closing my eyes and rubbing my temples. "So let me get this straight." I deadpanned. "You asked a Fallen Angel to stab you so that you could see boobs."

He shrugged. "Hey, it worked, didn't it?"

I twitched. "I don't care if it worked, that was a stupid plan!"

He snorted. "Easy for you to say. You have five girlfriends. That's like, premium access to Oppai Paradise! Single guys like Dohnaseek and I have to take what we can get."

"…Let me guess, you guys are friends, now."

He shrugged. "He's told me quite a bit about Fallen Angels that I never knew before. An Angel falls whenever they deny their Virtue… but usually, that happens due to one of three things." He held up a finger. "Their love of humanity," He raised a second finger. "Their hatred of someone else," He extended a third finger. "or being manipulated by a Fallen Angel."

He lowered his hand, putting it into his pocket. "Dohnaseek is of the first category, seeing as he fell from giving humanity forbidden knowledge. As such, he only holds a grudge against High-Class and Stray Devils." He paused, glaring at me. "Speaking of which, what the hell? When I first saw one, it shot lasers out of its' tits! I would think that would be something that you would've warned me about!"

I smirked, crossing my arms. "What, and spoil the surprise?"

He eyed me for a moment, before deciding it wasn't worth it. "Whatever. So, now that you know that the Fallen Angels are there, what will you do?"

I shrugged. "Depends. What are they doing here?"

He chuckled. "They're just there to represent the Fallen presence in Kuoh. It's apparently really boring, since all they do is sit in an old, musty church all day or kill the odd Stray Devil. He openly welcomes my visits, if only for a break from the skull-crushing boredom."

I paused. "So, they're non-violent?"

He nodded. "As far as he's concerned. Apparently, his superior ordered him to try and kill a local Sacred Gear user, but he refused point-blank and then fought the guy to a standstill."

I blinked. "Wait, really?" 'His superior? Kokabiel? What?'

He smirked. "Turns out, both Angels and Fallen Angels can draw power from their Purpose. The example he gave was that the Cadre-Class Fallen Angel, 'the Lightning of God' Baraqiel practically doubles in power whenever he uses his lightning. My buddy Dohnaseek was quite confused about why he was suddenly able to draw fifty times what he once was out of his Purpose, but he used it to smack his boss through a mountain. Odd, eh?"

'…Right. Angel of Knowledge, Tree of Knowledge, really should've seen the connection there.' I sighed. "All right, then. What else have you been up to lately?"

He shrugged. "Buchou took us to get familiars. I got bored and decided to look for one on my own."

I glanced behind him at the menacing Hydra standing behind him, about two stories tall and sporting nine vicious-looking heads. It had glowing red eyes, golden scales, and leathery red wings. Each of its' heads had a series of long, golden spines running from the top of its' skull to the base of its' neck. "I figured. Nice familiar, by the way."

Issei smirked, turning and reaching out to pet one of the heads. "Thanks. It's name is Dreadnought."

The large head leaned into his touch, purring metallically. I chuckled. "You do know that it's just a baby, right?"

He blinked, turning to stare incredulously at me. "You're shitting me."

I shook my head. "Hydras can grow as big as a mountain, and still be considered a baby. The largest of them may be wily enough to create advanced strategies, but they're still only beasts. They're an odd subspecies of dragon that can only mature in certain circumstances."

"…Like?"

I sighed. "Well, first they need to develop trust in another being." I gave him a significant look. "Once they do that, and they are given a stable living environment, they start maturing. After they gain enough sentience to understand the basics of language, the being has two options. Either it can allow all its' heads to develop their own personality, or it can create somewhat of a hivemind and combine the intelligence of all its' heads."

He blinked. "I… see. What's the difference?"

"In the short term? Not much. It's really the difference between having one Hydra with the maturity of a nine-year-old and having nine with the maturity of a one-year-old. With enough time and effort, you can raise each individual head to the level of human intelligence. Or, you could have one mind with an intelligence nine times that of a normal human."

He frowned. "All right, then what about long-term?"

I grinned. "Once the Hydra has developed enough to realize what 'gender' is, it picks a gender and develops sexual organs…"

He held up a hand. "Wait, wait, wait. How the hell do they reproduce before this step?"

I shrugged. "Asexually."

"Asexually?" He considered that, still absently scratching one of the heads under its' chin. "But then, how come we aren't drowning in wild Hydras?"

I snorted. "Simple. Immature Hydras are so stupid that they don't realize what 'reproducing' even is. All it knows is that suddenly, there's another Hydra on its' territory, and it immediately tries to kill it."

He nodded. "I see. Then, they just split in half every once in a while?"

I hesitated. "…Not quite. It requires the involvement of another creature to kickstart the process."

"How so?"

I chuckled. "Tell me, what is the Hydra the most well-known for?"

He glanced up at the creature. "It can regrow two heads where one is destroyed."

I grinned. "Well, if a Hydra can regrow its' head, then why can't the head regrow the body?"

He blinked. "It regrows… its' entire body… from a head."

"Well, not always. The right conditions have to be present. The mana concentration in the air around it, the state in which the head is left in, the amount of materials the new Hydra can eat, et cetera. Once the new Hydra is created, it's usually the size of the original head. It eats as much as it can of its' surroundings in order to complete its' abrupt growth."

He glanced at the purring Hydra. "I am now glad that I never did anything that could rip off a head."

I nodded. "The head that gets ripped off usually has the memories of the original and a grudge against whoever killed it."

He smirked. "That would've been interesting."

I shook my head, muttering to myself about insane blondes. "Anyway, it chooses its' gender, and then it becomes a… let's say it becomes a she. After it makes that decision, its' evolution path gets complicated, depending on which branch it took in the first place. But one thing does remain the same. Once it has gained human-level intelligence, it gains the ability to shift into human form. If it chose to have one personality per head, then you'll be left with nine different girls. If it chose to have one personality between its' heads, you'll be left with one hyperintelligent girl who can create up to eight clones of herself."

He stared at me for a moment, before turning to face the Hydra once more. "I'm not quite sure what to make of that."

Dreadnought didn't seem to understand a word of what we had just said, but still seemed to enjoy Issei's ministrations. I quietly took out my camera and took a few shots of the two for my scrapbook.

…What? Everyone has hobbies. I just so happen to have a scrapbooking collection that may or may not have blackmail material in it. I'm just very good at hiding it. It wouldn't do for people to know I can blackmail them.

I stowed away my camera, just as Issei sighed and addressed his Hydra. "Later, bud. I promise I'll play fetch with you then."

The Gremory family circle glowed into existence, spiriting away the large creature. He turned back to me, raising an eyebrow. "All right, so I told you about my week. Now where the hell have you been all this time?"

I coughed into my hand, my cheeks warming slightly. "I… got lost."

He raised an eyebrow. "Really? Where?"

I sighed, turning away and mumbling a reply. His smirk widened. "Excuse me? I didn't quite catch that."

I groaned, raising my voice slightly. "I was stuck in the same room the whole time."

He started laughing. "H-how did you…"

I grimaced. "I. Don't. Know. I just kept getting lost. I would open the door, walk through, and find myself in the same room I just left."

He laughed even harder. "W-what, d-did you f-forget to knock?"

I growled at him. "I. Could. Not. LEAVE!"

His laughter died down enough for him to ask, "What was in the room?"

I glared. "I'm not telling."

He frowned. "What? I promise I won't laugh. Honestly, how bad could it—"

"Alcoholics Anonymous."

He blinked. "Wait, what?"

"I was trapped in a room… in which there were people… from Alcoholics Anonymous. It was the most disturbing six days of my life. They kept trying to get me to talk about my 'problem'. I've never touched a drop of alcohol in my life!" '…Well, this life, anyway.'

He promptly broke his word, bursting out into wild laughter. 'Fucking Talent… I thought you were supposed to be useful!' I grumbled to myself as his laughter slowly died down.

We stood in silence for a moment, the burbling of the brook the only sound to be heard. Finally, I spoke up. "So… how's your life as a Peerage member going?"

He shrugged. "So-so. Rias really isn't a bad person at heart, she just doesn't seem to value human life all too much. But from what I've heard, that's pretty typical for High-Class Devils."

"Pretty much." I agreed. "Rias tends to treat her servants as family, so as far as High-Class Devils go, she's one of the better ones. Hence why I entrusted Valerie to her."

He nodded. "Yeah, I figured it was something like that. All the other members of her Peerage seem pretty happy with her, so I'm withholding judgement until I see why she reincarnated me in the first place."

I chuckled. "Well, then, you'll be in for a surprise."

He smirked. "Good. And speaking of Peerages…" He huffed and crossed his arms. "What gives? I was expecting a blonde, badass Vampire chick, and I get a kuudere loli with an attitude problem. And then there's the hime-miko Akeno, who I'm pretty sure is a hardcore masochist, Kiba, who practically worships his sword, and an apparently insane Dhampir that I have yet to meet. Rias sure has an odd bunch of merry men. Who are all fucking cosplayers." He hissed in irritation.

I shrugged. "I only brought Valerie. The rest is all her."

"She has Valerie wear a crown, Sensei." He deadpanned. "She uses a crown to hold her ponytail, which is pure white and allows her to look like a dead ringer for Shiro from No Life No Game. Rias's anime obsession is frankly terrifying."

I raised an eyebrow. "First off, your statement bleeds hypocrisy. Your main long-range attack is a rip-off of your favorite anime. Second off, what if that crown is actually a Sacred Gear?"

He blinked, ignoring my first statement. "Really? Hot damn, I'm jealous. I want something solid gold for a Sacred Gear."

I snickered. "You sure about that? I'm sure that bracelet—"

"No."

I pouted. "Fine. Ruin my fun. But yes, I would assume that the crown you say she wears is actually the manifested form of Sephiroth Graal. It can't actually do anything unless it's manifested, and, from what I remember, her Gear is a Sub-Species."

He nodded in understanding. "So, like my Sacred Gear."

"Ah. I take it you know about the Boosted Gear, then?"

He frowned. "Boosted Gear? I have a Twice Critical."

"Nope."

He raised an eyebrow. "Nope?"

"Nope." I agreed.

He sighed. "All right. What is it, then?"

"The Boosted Gear."

He just stared at me. "That means nothing to me."

I chuckled. "Try ))Boosting((."

He shrugged. "All right." He summoned a pair of odd gloves, plated with red metal and studded with green gems. "))Boost((." The green gem on the back of each glove flashed once.

I smiled, mentally counting to ten. "Now try it again."

He blinked. "O…kay? ))Boost((."

He stared in shock as the gems on his gloves flashed once more. "Bullshit."

"I bullshit you not." I replied, snickering, "Twice Criticals house immature Welsh Dragons. The Boosted Gear housed the one who gave the species their name."

He blinked. "Housed? Past-tense?"

I shrugged uncomfortably. "Well, um, you see… You know Ruby?"

He nodded slowly. "Yes? She's certainly kicked my ass plenty of times."

I smiled. "Well, she's Ddraig, the Dragon who was bound in your Gear."

He gave me a deadpan stare. "You're going to have to explain that one."

I chuckled. "Well, you see, I wanted to become a Dragon, and she was the best candidate for negotiation. I much prefer negotiating when the Dragon in question can't hunt you down and kill you if things go wrong."

He nodded. "That's probably smart. I take it things went well?"

"It did… until I accidentally proposed to her."

He blinked. "…Excuse me?"

I sighed. "She didn't know about Peerages, so when I asked her to be my )Queen(…"

Issei burst into laughter. "O-only you, Sensei. Only you can find a way to accidentally propose to a being ten times your power level."

I smirked at him. "At least I have a girlfriend."

He stopped laughing. "Dude. Low blow."

I smiled innocently. "I am a Devil, after all. It should be expected. Now, what was that about the insane Dhampir?"

He ignored me, stretching one arm over his head and yawning. "Uaaah… it's getting kinda late." He glanced at the position of the sun and sighed. "Looks like I'll have to go, soon."

I stared at him. "You do know that I taught you that tactic, right?"

He sighed. "Worth a shot. But yeah, from what I understand, Rias is a complete Otaku."

I raised an eyebrow. "Yes, I know. You just finished bitching about it. What does that have to do with anything?"

He scowled. "I was getting to that, just wait. Now, apparently when the Dhampir, Gaspar, arrived, he was a complete coward with no control over his Sacred Gear. Then, after you brought Valerie, they had a little talk. Rias didn't know what was said, but after they finished, Gaspar decided that he wanted to become as strong as possible, so as to protect his Peerage. He even went so far as to try to get over his hatred of blood, so as to be able to wield his Vampire powers."

I nodded slowly. "…And?"

"...So he remembered that Rias's anime, several of which he had been forced to cosplay for, had badass anime characters. He then decided to look up all the badass anime characters he could."

He paused, grinning. "Of course, having recently decided to embrace his Vampire nature, he first watched all the Vampire anime he could. Now, tell me, who are the most badass Vampires in all Anime history?"

I blinked. "…No."

His grin widened. "Yes. He used anime characters as role models."

I chuckled. "This is going to be epic."

He nodded, grinning menacingly. "I know, right? He's going to be so fricking awesome to fight!"

I sweatdropped. "…Well, okay, then. Enjoy that, I guess. I'll see you tomorrow."

He smirked. "I'll see you around, Sensei." He turned, walking back to his Door.

I turned back to my own Door, opening it and stepping through. I took the Knob off the wall on the other side, slipping it into my side pouch. I walked over to the magic circle in the corner, activating it and sending myself into the dining hall. I headed for the kitchen, checking in on the chaos—I mean, cooking that my girls had been up to for the past few hours.

Once I had arrived home, I cooked myself a hearty meal that was easily God-tier. All the Experience I had from the thousands of souls I had stored inside my Marble added up, and it certainly didn't hurt that I had Angra Mainyu as my instructor. Things went great… until my girls insisted on trying the meal. They devoured most of my food and demanded more. I ended up cooking more than I cared to that night. Of course, they all promptly took offense at the fact that I could cook better than they could, and decided to hone their own skills.

I opened the door to the kitchen, cautiously glancing over the room. Sera was humming happily and stirring a large pot, with Shirone at the cutting board next to her chopping up something green. Gil seemed to be teaching Asia to make some sort of dough, fending off Ruby with a wooden spoon as she tried to taste the dough.

I chuckled at the sight, stepping into the room and closing the door behind me. "Well, this is certainly more organized than I was expecting."

Sera jumped slightly, dropping the spoon and swiveling to face me. "Millicas-sama? When did you get here?"

"About two minutes ago." Shirone replied absently, picking up the cutting board and using her knife to scrape the diced greens into the pot.

Sera frowned. "Was I the only one to not notice?"

Shirone shrugged. "To be fair, we cheated."

Sera blinked. "What?"

"Remember that thing we talked about?" Ruby called from across the room.

Sera's eyes widened. "O-oh. Right."

She turned back to the pot, picking up the spoon and returning to stirring it. I raised an eyebrow at Ruby's vague reply. She sighed, temporarily ceasing her attempts to poach cookie dough. {I told her about the Bond.}

The second eyebrow joined the first. {And what was her reaction?}

Her hand darted out, snatching a piece of dough the instant Gil's attention lapsed. She happily zoomed over to (hide behind) me, munching on her prize. Gil gave her the evil eye, but didn't bother pursuing. She returned to her explanation a moment later, still chewing. {So, a day after you got Lost, Serafall approached me. She told me that she had asked Tou-san for advice, and that he had advised her to talk to me in order to learn the unspoken rules of our little group.}

I blinked. {We have rules?}

She gave me a look full of fond exasperation. {Yes, love. We have rules. Rule one, don't let me cook anything you don't want to explode. I can, and have, burnt water. I blame my Talent. Rule two, don't question the logic behind spontaneous events. If one of us trips and winds up kissing you, we don't bother questioning it and just enjoy the kiss.}

{Fair enough.}

{Anyway, she asked for my advice on how to fit in, among… other things. And after I told her about out Bond, she seemed a bit hurt that you didn't tell her. She does notice whenever you hide something from her, like the other day when you almost mentioned Gil's Divinity. She wanted to know why you don't trust her as much as the rest of us.}

She finished the last of her dough, licking her fingers. {So, I gave it to her straight. I told her how we knew that she was hiding something big from us, and we wanted to give her space to deal with it or tell us about it, before we mentioned the Soul Bond. She hasn't said a word on the subject since.}

I sighed. {That's probably for the best. Either she comes to terms with whatever skeletons she has in her closet, or she'll eventually be faced with a situation where she breaks down.} 'Every main character in the original series faced this problem at least once.'

{Agreed.} Ruby nodded once, before racing back to her post and reaching for another piece of cookie dough. Gil quickly administered the Wooden Spoon of Retribution to block her attempts.

I chuckled. "I take it dinner is almost done?"

Gil huffed. "It would be, if I didn't have to keep making more dough. Some of it keeps 'mysteriously disappearing'."

Ruby didn't bother looking sheepish. "I regret nothing."

Gil rolled her eyes. "I can tell."

Asia shyly interjected before the exchange could escalate into an argument. "U-um, Gil? Am I doing this right?"

Gil turned to see Asia tying on a frilly white apron. 'All right, that level of cute should be illegal.' I decided. I watched in amusement as Gil twitched, resisting the urge to cuddle the girl. Ruby showed no such restraint, glomping the poor Angel and knocking her to the floor. Shirone turned to Serafall. "Behold, yet another tradition—the spontaneous cuddle pile."

Sera's eyes widened. "Can I join?"

Shirone nodded seriously. "Asia-cuddles are wonderful things that must be shared equally."

Sera created a Clone to watch the soup, before joining the impromptu cuddle-fest. I sighed. "And this is why we never get anything done."

Ruby and Sera shushed me, snuggling a confused Asia. Gil sighed, walking over to the oven and putting the tray of cookies inside. "To be fair, it's one of the best ways to waste time that I know of."

I nodded in agreement. "It is, indeed."

"U-um, Sera? Ruby? Can you please let me go now?" Asia finally asked meekly.

"Nope!" Ruby chirped. "Five more minutes."

Asia frowned. "But, I still have to make cookies!"

Ruby was clearly torn. "Cookies?"

Asia nodded. "I'll even give you some dough."

Ruby smiled, letting go of her and standing. "Deal!"

Sera gasped dramatically. "What? You would desert cuddles for cookies?"

Ruby crossed her arms. "Heathen! You shall not demean the deliciousness of cookies!"

I sighed, deciding to find somewhere to sit. This was going to take a while.

After a surprisingly good meal, and sacrificing half the cookies to a hungry Dragon, we bade Sera a good night and retired to my room. After climbing in bed, we fell asleep with Asia's soft wings wrapped around us.

The next morning, I slipped out of Asia's feathery embrace and headed to the bathroom to preform my morning ritual. I returned to see Asia performing the unenviable task of waking Ruby and Shirone. Gil was brushing her hair on the foot of the bed, looking on in amusement as Asia futilely tried to extricate herself from Shirone's sleepy hug. I sighed, walking over to the desk and taking out one of last night's cookies, rustling the plastic bag noisily. Ruby's eyes shot open, her head swiveling. "Are those cookies?"

I smiled. "Yes, they are. Would you like one?"

I quickly found myself empty-handed as the bag of cookies disappeared. I sighed. "Ruby, we've had this conversation before. You can't have cookies for breakfast. You can have one, but no more."

Ruby pouted at me. "But… cookies!"

I chuckled and ruffled her hair. "Yes, Ruby. Cookies. Now, let's wake Shirone so that we can get to school."

She smiled, taking a bite of her cookie. "I have an idea."

"…Go on."

She handed me the bag of cookies, walking back over to the bed. She reached out and began stroking one of Asia's wings. Asia squeaked, turning bright red. "R-Ruby! You know those are sensitive!"

She smirked, glancing at Shirone's flushed cheeks. "I know. That's the idea."

Shirone opened one eye, glaring back at Ruby. "Damn it, Ruby. I thought you were on my side!"

She shrugged. "I know. But then I was bribed, imagine that."

"Et tu, Brute." She grumbled, letting go of Asia and sitting up. She yawned, finally stumbling off the bed and allowing Asia to stow her wings.

Asia slipped off the bed as well, gracefully gliding across the floor. Shirone huffed, eying her even gait. "I don't get how you have the grace of an Angel, but you can still break your locker door so badly they had to pry it open with a crowbar."

She flushed. "I only touched it, I swear!" She protested, slipping off her nightgown and reaching for her school uniform.

I shook my head in amusement. "You seem to forget how little sense my Talent makes. I just got back from an unintentional trip to somewhere in Canada after I took a wrong turn trying to find the school's science lab. Or how you managed to Forget where you put your phone, only to suddenly 'remember' and find it inside my pocket. After I had been Lost for a week."

Shirone blinked. "Wait, really?"

"Yes." I deadpanned. "You also managed to Forget that you hadn't done your homework, and received a perfect score. Don't question the logic, just accept it."

She shrugged, tying her jacket around her waist. "Fair enough."

I glanced around. "Everyone ready?"

They nodded. I smiled, opening a ))Gate(( to one of my jump points in Kuoh. We walked through, exiting into a dark alleyway. Considering that everyone but Asia had night vision, we weren't too worried about running into anyone. I closed the ))Gate((, gently taking Asia by the hand and leading her out of the alley. Once the street came into view, I immediately checked to make sure that our usual breakfast restaurant was open.

…Hey, we had to find somewhere that we could eat lunch with Asia. It wouldn't be fair to make her wait in my room while the rest of us ate with my family. I would feel bad for avoiding my little sister, if not for the fact that she was staying at my grandparents' for the month.

The bell jingled merrily as we entered the little diner. Gil and Asia immediately headed to the counter, merrily chatting with the head waitress. From what my girls had told me, she was three months pregnant and had been working this job for five years.

Ruby, Shirone, and I headed to our usual booth, where Sera was already waiting. Sera smiled, cheerfully leaping to her feet and giving me an enormous hug. "Good morning, Millicas-sama!"

Shirone sighed, glancing over at Gil. "You know, I think I get how you two get along so well."

Sera pouted at her, her arms still wrapped around me. "That's not fair. You call him 'Master', don't you?"

Shirone shrugged, her ears briefly flickering into visibility. "I'm a cat who's addicted to my Master's attention. What's your excuse?"

Sera let go of me and adopted an innocent look. "But, Si-chan, how can I not address my savior with the appropriate respect? To do otherwise would be to be ungrateful!"

Shirone twitched. "All right, then I'm hereby giving you permission to address him casually."

Sera sighed melodramatically. "Oh, but I'm afraid that it's not your debt to forgive."

I watched with hidden amusement as Shirone gritted her teeth. "All right then, I'm giving you permission." I cut in, wishing I hadn't left my camera on the desk last night.

Sera's eyes sparkled, and she wrapped her arms around mine, her breasts pressing against my arm. "Oh, Millicas-sama, you're so humble!"

Shirone twitched. "You're just messing with me, aren't you?"

Sera just smiled.

We finished breakfast with our usual drama, Asia somehow managing to avoid any sudden cuddles from her occasional (adorable) yawns.

As we walked to school, I heard a voice from behind us. "Oi, Sensei!"

I turned, seeing Issei running up to us. He caught up without much trouble, not even out of breath from his rapid pace. He threw an arm around my shoulders, smiling at my girls. "Hey, guys, mind if I borrow him for a minute?"

Ruby shook her head. "Fine with me. Just make sure to get him to class on time, we don't need him getting Lost again."

Issei nodded, leading me towards an empty stairwell. He removed his arm from my shoulders, leaning against the wall. "So… Rias popped into my room last night, and tried to get me to have sex with her."

I blinked. "Huh. That's a thing."

He snorted. "Yeah, sure. It was going great until your mom cockblocked me. Remembered me from a few times I came over to your place. Called me by name, even. Confused the hell out of Rias."

I raised an eyebrow. "…And?"

"And it would seem that my dear )King( realized that I'm not quite what I seem." He smirked. "Even if she's a manipulative bitch, she's still managed to figure it out only from what few slip-ups I've made so far. And that's enough to get my respect, at least."

I nodded. "Good. Now, why are you telling me this?"

He shrugged. "She said she'd explain later today. I wanted your permission to let her in on the joke."

I chuckled. "Sure. Heck, tell the whole club!"

He blinked. "Wait, but you said—"

I smirked, cutting him off. "I know what I said. Just wait until she explains herself before telling her."

He nodded slowly. "O…kay, then. I'll take your word for it."

I grinned. "Great! Now, um…" My smile turned sheepish. "You might want to be the one to lead the way back to class."

Issei burst out laughing.

The rest of the day went pretty well, all things considered. My father had wisely put a special note in my file that told of my 'delicate constitution' that occasionally kept me out of school for weeks at a time. Fortunately, Shadow Clones were excellent for catching up on missed homework.

As the final bell rang, Kiba Yuuto appeared at the door, smiling pleasantly. "Millicas? Buchou wants you in the clubroom."

I nodded. "Alright. Can I pick up my friends, first?"

His smile widened slightly, turning genuine. "You mean your 'friends'? Sure. Take all the time you need."

I smiled back, standing and heading for the door. "Then let's go pick them up."

Issei stood as well. "I assume that Buchou will be explaining things, as well?"

Kiba nodded. "She did say something to that effect, yes."

Issei smirked. "All right, then. Let's go."

Asia followed as I left the room, taking my hand and falling into step beside me. I made sure to let her lead me along, so as to no engage my Talent. She sent me a sidelong glance, her green eyes sparkling with slight concern. {You're hiding something, aren't you.}

It was more of a statement than a question, but I answered anyway. {Yes, but it'll be faster for you to just wait and see.}

Asia accepted without question. Her thoughts turned towards the cookies Gil had taught her to make last night, idly speculating on whether Ruby would enjoy them more if she added chocolate chips.

I chuckled to myself as I saw her (adorable) look of concentration. {I somehow doubt that Ruby would care all that much about the kind of cookies. She just likes cookies.}

{But still, I have to try!} She replied, making a determined face.

I sighed, opening the door to the next classroom. {Just ask her, then. She's right here.} "Ruby, Sera!"

Both girls paused their conversation, turning to look at me. I gestured to Kiba. "I have stuff to do. I wanted to pick you up, first."

They both nodded, grabbing their bags and heading for the door. Well… I say they headed for the door… but, seeing as it was the Dynamic Duo, they more… bounced over. Literally and metaphorically. Asia's hand tightened around mine in warning as several of the guys practically drooled at the sight. 'Must… not… kill…'

Sera grabbed my arm, her eyes sparkling. "Millicas-sama! You came to get me!"

I basked in the ensuing glares. 'That's right, assholes. She's off-limits.' "Of course I did, Sera. It wouldn't be the same without you here."

She smiled happily, staring off into space as her cheeks slowly reddened. I was simultaneously curious about and terrified of what she was thinking. I turned to Ruby instead, sighing when I saw her cuddling Asia. "You know, you seem to be doing that a lot more, lately."

She smiled at me, letting go of Asia and hugging me instead. {I'll explain later.}

'…Ooookay, then.' I waited until she let go before gesturing for Asia to lead once more. We chatted about nothing in particular, mentioning the weather, the latest gossip, like that. When we reached the next classroom, I opened the door to see an irritated Shirone with a flushed Gil behind her. "Someone's been having cuddles without me again. I am not amused."

Ruby smiled, pulling her into a large hug. "All right, fine, if you insist."

I sighed, turning to Gil. "I take it Shirone's been like this all day?"

She nodded. "She French-kissed me in the middle of math class. It's only gotten worse from there."

Shirone smirked, slipping away from the hug to pull Gil into a deep kiss. Gil 'eeped', but allowed it. Asia sighed, ignoring the sight in favor of making polite conversation with Kiba. Sera, surprisingly enough, watched the kiss with great interest. '…I'm not touching that one.' I decided.

Shirone broke the kiss, humming happily and patting Gil's flushed face. {Good girl.}

{…You know, taking advantage of her sub kink in the middle of school isn't really advisable.} I deadpanned, eying the shocked faces around us.

{On the contrary.} Shirone replied, smirking. {She wants people to know whose she is. She'd like it even more if you were the one to do it.}

Kiba coughed uncomfortably. "A-ah… Ravel? You might want to put the moment on hold for now."

{…This is not a conversation for right now.} I agreed, sighing and allowing Asia to lead the way.

Once we reached the doors of the school, I kissed Asia on the forehead. "I'll see you later." I told her. {And be safe. All of you.} I finished.

Issei, Kiba, and I crossed the campus to the old school building, walking up the stairs to the clubroom. Kiba opened the doors, walking through and stepping to the side. Rias was at her desk, doing an admirable attempt at a gendo pose. Akeno was standing by her side. Valerie was sitting at the couch eating sweets, and a tall man in silver was standing behind her.

I blinked, observing him more closely. He wore a charcoal suit, leather riding boots, and an intricately knotted red cravat, covered by a full-length, silver frock overcoat with a cape. His head was covered by a large silver fedora, and his eyes were concealed by pair of heavily tinted circular silver sunglasses. I could see the reflection of the entire room in its' lenses. His hair was silver, and I was willing to bet that his eyes were red.

"'Sup, bitch." He called, grinning widely.

'Abridged version it is, then.' "I need to talk to you about some important guests coming here today." I told him seriously, fighting back a smile.

He froze, before his grin sharpened. "Are they hookers?"

"No."

"And, like that, you've lost me." He replied. He turned to Rias, smirking. "I like him."

She sighed. "It figures you would."

I turned to the last occupant of the room. "Hi, Mom."

She turned, smiling at me. "Millicas. I'm glad to see you're enjoying yourself with your Peerage, even if it is at school."

I shrugged. "As long as they're happy, I don't really care where I am."

She nodded in satisfaction. "Good boy. Your father took several years of marriage to learn that lesson, so I'm glad you could learn it early."

Rias cleared her throat, interrupting my reply. "Good, you're all here."

My mother turned back to her. "Milady, should I tell them?"

Rias shook her head, holding up a hand and addressing her Peerage. "The truth is…"

A large magic circle flared to life by the door, bearing the crest of the Phenex family. A burst of flames flared to life, fading to reveal Riser in his disguised form. "Ah, the human world. I haven't been here for a while." He said arrogantly, turning to stare down his nose at the room's occupants.

Gaspar sighed. "Look, you're going to have to explain this one to me. Who the fuck is this pretentious bastard? He looks like what would happen if a golden retriever had sex with the drapes."

My mother ignored the course language, instead addressing the question. "This is Riser Phenex-sama. He is Rias's fiancé."

Gaspar glanced at Rias. "Wow, I don't envy you. He must be an absolute asshole."

Riser and Issei stared at one another for a moment, before smirking and returning to their fake personas. "Ah, my darling Rias, I've come to visit you!" Riser called, gesturing grandly.

Rias twitched, glaring. "Riser, I told you, I'm not marrying you! Not now, not ever!"

He sighed, irritation flickering across his face. "Look, as much as I would love to 'follow my heart' or whatever, we have no choice in this matter. The contract was signed before we were even born, and my father refuses to break it."

Rias glared. "Be that as it may, I still refuse to marry the likes of you! I will—" She faltered slightly, finally registering what he had said. "Wait, what?"

He shrugged. "I have a Peerage full of girls I'm not allowed to touch until either I marry you or break the contract. They would all be more than happy giving me their virginity. Unfortunately, I am literally unable to have sex, seeing as the magic of the contract binds me. Do you have any idea how annoying it is to not be able to get it up?"

Rias huffed in irritation. "That's not my problem, you pig. You can go burn in hell for all I care."

Riser took a deep breath, and let it out. "You really won't reconsider?"

She shook her head vehemently. "Never!"

My mother stepped forward, clearing her throat. "If that's the case, then I will tell you both the third option. Sirzechs-sama has authorized me to grant you a Rating Game to settle your differences."

Riser twitched. "Mother, what differences are there to settle! Neither of us want this, and I would rather marry a dog than her. At least it would be less of a bitch."

Gaspar snickered. "Buuuurrrrnnn."

My mother shook her head. "My apologies, but this is the only way."

Issei grinned, turning to my mother. "So, if we beat Shika-Shika-Boom Man, here, we're home free?"

Mother nodded. "Indeed. If you can—"

Issei didn't bother waiting, instead dropping his illusion and punching Riser full in the face. There was a high-pitched *Tssiurrrii* sound, and both the circle Riser blocked with and the illusion masking him shattered. Riser grinned, holding up a hand to snap his fingers. Gaspar blurred into existence between the two, one gun pointed at each boy's head.

"Stop this at once!" My mother commanded, ice crystals forming behind her.

My students groaned, stepping back and slipping back on their illusions. Riser turned to his fiancé. "I was going to give you an entire month to prepare, but since you've got him in you Peerage, I'm cutting it down to two weeks. As long as you do something besides sit on your asses, you should have a shot at winning this thing."

Gaspar sighed melodramatically. "Now, that's hardly ladylike of you. I was all up and ready to go, but then you killed the mood."

Rias ignored Gaspar, apparently used to his antics. "I…see. Well, Riser, I will accept your offer. But only so that I can more fully learn the capabilities of my Pieces."

Riser smirked. "I look forward to beating you, then."

'…Ah, who am I kidding. He's going to throw the match. He hates Rias's guts. To be fair, though, the one time he tried to be a gentleman with her, she was not only ungrateful, but his sister was kidnapped in the time it took him to get home. And judging by his irritation with her afterwards, Rias didn't give two shits that he thought it was her fault.'

My mother nodded and spoke, shaking me from my thoughts. "Very well, then. In two weeks' time, the Rating Game to decide the fate of Rias Gremory will be held."

Riser nodded once, summoning another circle. "Well, then. I shall see you then, my worthy opponents."

He disappeared in a large fireball, forcing Gaspar and Issei to step back or get toasted. Gaspar sighed, adjusting his hat. "Well, that wasn't very nice. I was just getting started. Though, being cock-blocked by a hot chick is nothing new to me, considering who my boss is."

Issei grinned. "I'll fight you, if you'd like."

Gaspar turned to him, raising an eyebrow. "Oh? And why the hell would I care?"

Issei shrugged, his eyes gleaming. "I haven't had a decent fight in ages, and you seem to have the same problem. So, let's help each other out. What else are friends for?"

Gaspar smiled, revealing sharpened teeth. "You know, I think we're going to be the best of friends."

Issei's default cocky smirk returned. "Glad to hear it. So, just to be sure, here, do you have a stockpile of souls?"

Gaspar nodded. "Stray Devils aren't very filling, but they do."

Issei held up a fist. "Great, now I won't have to hold back!"

Rias cleared her throat. "Boys?"

They both heaved great sighs, grumbling as they returned to their original places. My mother smiled slightly, a hint of nostalgia in her eyes as she watched the two teens trade barbed insults. Rias sighed. "Grayfia, is there anything else you require?"

Mother shook her head. "No, I should be going. Thank you for your hospitality, Milady. I shall see you another time."

She bowed, disappearing in a flash of white light. Rias turned to Issei, raising an eyebrow. "So?"

Issei put a hand in his pocket, leaning against the wall. "What do you want to know?"

She narrowed her eyes hat him. "Let me re-introduce myself. I am Rias Gremory, heir to house Gremory. You're obviously not the Issei Hyoudou I know, so who are you?"

Issei smirked, dropping his illusion and bowing dramatically. "Wow, thanks for that pompous self-introduction. I'm—just as the appearance suggests—uncivilized and savage, Issei Hyoudou. Vulgar, brutal, and hedonistic; all that I need to be a hopeless person. Please follow the Rules of Use and Dosage Guidelines when interacting with me, Milady. Taking any more than the prescribed amount may lead to nasty side effects."

She raised an eyebrow once more. "I see. Very well, then. I take it you know Riser?"

Issei snorted. "We studied under the same Sensei. He taught me short- to mid-range skills, and taught him mid- to long-range attacks."

She nodded. "I see. Then, I take it you know most of his tricks?"

He shrugged. "Most of them, at least. I'm sure he has some saved up, just like I do."

Rias smiled. "Good. Would you mind if I asked what they are?"

He shook his head. "Nah, it's fine. The biggest thing to worry about are his insane regeneration skills. Not the normal Phenex rate, but to the point that he can heal faster than you damage him."

She nodded seriously. "I see. Now, I take it you have a plan?"

He nodded. "I punch him. Repeatedly."

"…That's it? What about the rest of us?"

He chuckled. "No offense, Buchou, but you'd probably crumple like a paper cup if he so much as looked at you too hard. If you want to do more than just leaving him to me, you're going to have to do some serious training."

"Very well." She folded her hands. "You spoke of a Sensei? What if he trained us?"

Issei winced. "Ah, bad idea. He's batshit crazy."

'Well fuck you too, buddy.' I griped to myself.

Rias sighed. "Well, do you have any better ideas?"

He shook his head.; "Oh, no, Sensei is definitely your best bet. I just don't think you could survive his training."

{Training. From. Hell.} Shirone sent in irritation.

{Hey, it worked, didn't it?} I sent back.

Rias stood, looking at each member of her Peerage in turn. "Are you all prepared to face this training?"

Akeno smiled. "Ara, why would I not? It sounds like so much fun."

Valerie sighed, setting down her box of pocky. "I'll do it." She told Rias in a monotone.

Gaspar gasped dramatically. "Oh, my goodness. I'm soo sorry. See, there's this awesome other thing that I had to do… wait, what was it again? Oh, right, nothing. It's either this or Adventure Time, and I've been binge-watching that show for days. I need a good fight."

Kiba's smile turned slightly strained. "Er… same as Gaspar, I guess. We're with you, Buchou."

Issei sighed. "All right, I'll take you to him later today. I take it you have school covered for his training time?"

Rias nodded. "As a member of the Occult Research Club, you can be excused for 'club activities' at any time."

He smirked. "Nice. I like it. Now, any other questions?"

She smiled, turning to me. "Not for you, Issei. As for you, Troll, I would like to ask a favor of you."

I raised an eyebrow. "So that's why you needed me. All right, ask."

Her smile widened slightly. "Would you mind telling me the True Name of Kiba's—"

"Not telling." I replied, cutting her off. "That would just make it harder for him to find it himself."

She huffed, crossing her arms, emphasizing her large bust. "But why?"

I sighed. "You… do know that I have five girlfriends, right? Boob jiggle does nothing to me. Besides, you're acting like a spoilt brat right now. Just wait, he'll hear it eventually."

She glared at me for a moment. "Fine." She grumbled. "Then, would you mind telling me what Issei's Sub-Species can do? I seem to recall Onii-sama telling me something about your ability to discern the abilities of a Gear by touching them."

I shrugged. "Fine with me."

She smiled, taking out a notepad and a pen. "Excellent."

I walked over, touching the green gems and using ))Structural Grasp(( on it. I hummed in thought. "All right, so this is surprisingly basic. It extends the ability to ))Boost(( to anything you can place your hands on."

Rias sighed. "That's nice, but not too powerful."

I snorted. "How the fuck is the )Boosted Gear( not powerful?"

Rias froze. "B-Boosted Gear? I thought it was a Twice Critical!"

I groaned. 'This is going to take a while.'

'))Avatar((? Check.'

'Kindly old man form?' I shifted my Avatar's appearance, making it shorter and more elderly. It was mostly bald, with only some white, unkempt hair left on the back of his head. It sported a bushy white mustache. 'Check.'

'Obvious troll?' I glanced at the jar of 'glue' in my hands. 'Check.'

'Subtle troll?' I glanced around at the traditional Japanese building around me. I sat in the middle of the floor on top of a velvet cushion, with nothing else in the room. 'Check.'

I glanced up at the ceiling. 'Auxiliary troll? Check.'

I ate a spoonful of 'glue', listening to the footsteps coming down the hallway. The door opened, revealing Issei and the rest of Rias's Peerage. Sona stood beside Rias, her own Peerage gathered behind her. I smiled cheerfully. "Hello, all!" I ate another spoonful of pudding.

Issei walked over, kneeling down to make eye contact with me. "Good morning, Sensei."

"Ah, good morning, my boy! Would you like some glue?" I asked. I continued to smile cheerfully at him, as if I hadn't just offered to feed him crafting supplies.

He gave me a pained smile. "S-sure, Sensei."

I gave him a plastic spoon and held out the jar. "Eat up!"

Issei took a spoonful, making a point to choke it down slowly. "T-thanks, Sensei." He managed, handing me the spoon and stumbling away.

I turned to the people awkwardly standing at the door. "Would any of you like any?"

Gaspar blinked. "…You know what? Sure."

He walked over, taking the spoon Issei left and eating a spoonful. He 'chewed' thoughtfully, humming. "Not bad." He took another. "Not bad at all. Elmer's?"

I nodded, smiling at him. "A connoisseur, I see. Indeed, it is Elmer's, aged for ten years before consumption."

Gaspar smiled slightly, inclining his head. "A man such as you, I can most definitely respect. Teach me well, Sensei."

I raised a bushy white eyebrow. "Eh? Students?" I turned to Issei. "You brought more students? Good! It's always good to have new blood."

I turned to the door once more. "Any other takers?"

Rias looked repulsed, and Sona was avoiding eye contact. Finally, Tsubaki, Sona's )Queen(, spoke up hesitantly. "If I may… why would anyone eat glue?"

I glanced at her, a sparkle in my eye. "Ah, well, you know what they say. A jar a day keeps the assholes away!"

She blinked. Twice. "I… see. I retract my question."

Issei shot her a look that clearly said, 'BATSHIT CRAZY'. She nodded ever so slightly. I sighed. "If no one wants to eat the glue, I can put it away so we can begin."

Gaspar raised a hand. "I'll eat it."

Rias shot him a look. Gaspar just shrugged. "What? It's Elmer's! Top-class!"

I smiled, handing him the jar. "Feel free, my boy. I'm just happy to meet a fellow enthusiast."

He sighed, taking the jar and eating a spoonful. "Well, it's one of the few things that make this world worth existing."

I nodded. "It is indeed. That, and tasty food."

I rose to my full height of four feet, picking up my cushion and moving to the back of the room. I sat once more, gesturing for them to sit as well. The teens hesitantly entered the room, sitting in a rough semicircle around me. I cleared my throat. "Well, now that we're settled, let's begin. What do you know of the supernatural? Name first, then answer."

They all exchanged confused glances. "Momo Hanakai, sir. And, um, we're Devils, sir. We know about the supernatural."

I sighed. "Yes, dearie, but what do you know? Yes, you have wings and magic, but what can you tell me of the enemies you face?"

Sona straightened, adjusting her glasses. "Sona Sitri. The supernatural world is comprised of different Factions, all the result of a different culture's belief system—"

I cut her off with the wave of a hand. "Still not what I was looking for. I'll come back to htat in a moment. Now, what would you do if that nice Dhampir over there decided to do his level best to kill you?"

She frowned. "I would… have Tsubasa use her Twinkle Aegis—"

"No, what would you do?" I asked patiently, folding my hands. "In the time it takes for you to say 'Twinkle', he would have torn your throat out and moved on to kill three other members of your Peerage."

She hesitated. "I'd… create a shield of water."

I eyed her appraisingly. "Nice try, but no. Before you could even create the water, he would have killed you. One more."

She turned to look at Gaspar, studying him. I chuckled. "You should have sized him up first, girl."

She sighed, rubbing her eyes. "I would flee."

I nodded. "A solid strategy, and even if he is faster than you, then you would at least buy enough time to use one of those other strategies of yours."

I turned to Rias, gesturing to the man in the red headband that I assumed to be Loup Garou. "What would you do if he attacked you on a full moon?"

She smiled confidently at me. "I would annihilate—"

"Nope. Too much time. And even if you could get off a blast large enough to hurt him, he's stronger, faster, and can regenerate before you can recharge the blast. Dead." I corrected, smiling pleasantly.

She gritted her teeth. "I would dodge."

"Same issue. He has more physical ability than you, so he could tire you out with no problem."

Growling, she snapped, "Then, I'd die!"

I sighed. "Probably, yes. And that's what we're here to fix." I turned to Sona once more. "In your case… you are a water mage, yes? Use water from your surroundings instead of creating it. If your life is in danger, and there is no other option, recall that your body itself is 60% water. Furthermore," I continued, eyes gleaming dangerously, "as a half-human, his is, too. Pop his heart, stop his motion by freezing all the blood in his body. Even if he has a stockpile of souls ready, they won't help him if he's frozen from the inside."

Sona paled slightly. I turned to Rias. "For your opponent, I would suggest punching him in the face. It would stun him for long enough for someone to help you. Or, you could shove your fingers into his eye and summon your Power of Destruction. His brain is the one thing he cannot regenerate. And even if he could, it would take enough time for you to acquire something silver and stab him somewhere fatal."

She nodded. "I see."

I chuckled. "Good. Now, next question. What is the one thing about the supernatural world you must never forget?"

Both girls blinked. Rias groaned, rubbing her eyes. "Just tell us. We aren't going to guess it."

I smiled at her. "Now, where's the fun in that? Let me give you a hint." I gestured at the room around us. "There's something wrong with this picture, and your Dhampir friend is the only one who seems to have figured it out."

They all glanced around in alarm, Saji stumbling to his feet. "W-what? You tricked us?"

I snorted. "Please. If I were trying to kill you," I cranked up the killing intent. "YOU WOULD BE DEAD. Now, sit down, my boy. Perhaps some glue would help? Vintage 1987!" I smiled cheerfully, holding out a jar of 'glue' to the now-pale Devils.

Gaspar chuckled, unfazed. "It really is good. It just… slides down your throat."

Valerie, also unaffected, sighed. "You really should get a hobby." She told her childhood friend.

He frowned. "I do have a hobby! I take very enthusiastic walks!"

I chuckled. "Sounds fun!"

Rias regained her composure. "I-I see. Well, Sensei, my apologies for doubting you. Now, tell me, am I allowed to use any means to find what is wrong, here?"

I nodded. "Absolutely!"

She turned to Gaspar. "What's wrong with this picture?"

I frowned. "Well, that just takes all of the fun out of it. Put all the fun in camps, why don't you?"

Gaspar chuckled. "Yeah, you fun Nazi."

Rias gritted her teeth. "Gaspar…"

He groaned. "But Riaasss…" He whined melodramatically.

She glared at him. He sighed. "Fiiiine. Fun Nazi." He smiled. "You see, the thing about this building…" His teeth sharpened. "…is that it wasn't here yesterday."

I nodded cheerfully. "Yep! Exactly!"

Rias stood. "What did you do?" She demanded.

I sighed. "I proved a point. 95% of the Moonlit world is comprised of beings who would love nothing more than to kill you, to violate you, to lead you to your doom. They trick you not because they are incapable of otherwise killing you, but because it's fun for them. Merely stepping into their domain grants them tremendous power over you, and speaking with them can place you in their thrall."

Sona narrowed her eyes at me. "And what about you?"

I chuckled. "In accordance with ancient laws, every being of illusion must follow a predesignated set of rules. Every spell must have a reverse, like with The Midas Touch or the Frog Prince. They must tell you these rules, should you ask. Of course, they have their choice of languages to tell it to you in."

I paused, sighing. "Entering their game makes you subject to their rules. You cannot break them any more than your opponent can. There is always one way to win, and one way to lose. Should the trickster lose, they must grant the winner a boon of the same value as the object they sought to win."

Sona's eyes narrowed. "So? How do we 'win' your little game?"

I gestured to the jar of 'glue' that Gaspar had just finished. "You eat the glue."

She blinked. "A-are you serious?"

I snorted. "Hahaha, nope."

I deactivated ))Avatar(( and shattered the surrounding Projection. I came face-to-face with a crowd of surprised teens… all of whom had bright pink hair. "Unfortunately, I don't qualify for those particular ancient laws."

Gaspar chuckled. "Nice."

I bowed slightly. "I take it you enjoyed the pudding?"

He grinned. "I did, indeed."

I turned to the rest of the crowd, bowing dramatically. "Millicas Gremory, at your service." I straightened up. "I will be teaching you for the next two weeks."

I watched as both )Kings( stared at me in shock. "Hey, Issei, you get that?"

Issei grinned, holding up the video camera. "Every moment, in 1080-pixel glory."

We shared a fist bump. "Good man. I'll get the video to Sera—"

Sona miraculously regained her wits in time to throw a blast of water towards the camera. I sighed, throwing up a basic barrier. "Really?"

She smirked, increasing the power behind the water. "Indeed."

I took the camera, forming a Gate and stepping through. "So, the problem with that one is, I can just leave. I'll see you tomorrow, my adorable students!"

I eye-smiled, channeling my inner Kakashi. The Gate closed. 'All in all, a very productive day.' I mused, turning to set the camera on my desk.

My girls were currently in a loose circle, trying to teach an extremely confused Asia the basics of strip poker. "…don't think this is very good idea." She squeaked, leaning away from Shirone as the white Nekoshou tried to see her hand.

I sighed. "Why is it always strip poker?"

Gil sighed, eying her hand. "Hell if I know. I keep getting talked into it, for some reason. I hate the game."

Sera blinked, not seeming the least bit embarrassed about her missing shirt. "Wait, you mean you guys have played this before?"

Shirone smirked. "Many times."

"But, you said—"

"I know." Shirone agreed, her smirk turning smug. "I lied."

Ruby stood, throwing her arms around me and resting her head on my chest. "I missed you."

I raised an eyebrow. "It's been less than an hour."

She smiled up at me. "I know. I still missed you."

I picked her up, taking two steps and setting her on the bed. "All right, then. You said you'd explain later, and now is later."

She hummed happily, nuzzling into my side. "Okay. So, you know how my physiology is more Dragon than Devil?"

I nodded slowly. "…Yes?"

She smiled at me. "It's almost Mating Season, silly. And even if we're skipping this year, my instincts are still raring to go."

I blinked. "Oh, right, I forgot about that. It starts at sixteen, right? Any chance of me having any problems with my Wrath?"

She shook her head. "Fortunately, since you choose to indulge your Greed over your Wrath, it seems that your instincts have prioritized that, instead. Haven't you…" She shook her head. "Never mind, you've said you can't see your own aura. It's… changed, slightly. I can't quite describe it, but it seems to draw us in more, while turning other people away. I'm just… more susceptible to it, since I've started Nesting. I want to stay close, and I want all my lovers in one place."

I stroked her head, watching the drama in front of us. Sera was whining childishly about losing, Asia was staring at her hand, and Gil was stopping Shirone from peeking at Asia's cards. Ruby giggled. "I love my family." She told me. "I really do. Even if it's a little broken, and a lot crazy, I wouldn't trade it for the world." A moment later, she shivered. "It's chilly in here."

I glanced down at her. "Ruby, you're literally only wearing panties. Frankly, I'm shocked that you aren't blushing as red as a tomato right now."

She shrugged. "For the next month, I'm either going to be immune to embarrassment as I try to seduce you, or I'm going to get flustered at the slightest touch. Tiamat has been very helpful in warning me about what having a Claim would do to my cycle."

I nodded. "I see." I glanced back down at her. "But seriously, you might want to find your clothes."

She smirked, sliding onto my lap and pressing her forehead against mine. "All right." She whispered. "If you insist."

She slid off my lap, adding an extra sway to her hips as she walked across the room to grab a spare set of clothes. When she leaned down to pick up her bra, however, I decided that it was time to stop watching.

Shirone smirked, giving Ruby a thumbs-up. "Nice."

Ruby raised an eyebrow, hooking the back of her bra. "My ass, or my attempt at one of your favorite stunts?"

Shirone smirked, eying her shapely form. "Both. You do have a very nice ass."

I ignored them, instead striking up a conversation with my other girls. "So, how did they convince you three to play?"

"Gods only know." Gil grumbled, eying her cards. "They even banned omnipotence, the tyrants."

Asia smiled. "They asked me to."

"I was curious." Sera replied innocently.

I chuckled. "If you're 'curious', then why didn't you take them to a hot spring?"

Sera blinked. "I… didn't think of that." She turned to where Shirone and Ruby were having a lively debate between the merits of tits versus ass. "Hey girls, I know where we're going tomorrow!" She called cheerfully.

They both glanced over. Sera smiled. "See, there's this nice hot spring I know of…"

Shirone held up a hand. "Say no more, we're in."

"U-um, a hot spring does sound nice…" Asia added timidly.

"You… do realize that they're going to grope you, right? There's a good reason that you stopped letting them shower with you." I pointed out in amusement.

She smiled. "Yes, but they'll enjoy themselves, and that's what matters to me."

I glanced at her cards and sighed. "You… do realize that's a bad hand, right?"

Her eyes widened, glancing down at her hand. "Really? I thought low numbers were good!"

I deadpanned at the suddenly sheepish-looking girls. "I'm not surprised."

Gil huffed, face red. "In my defense, I was blackmailed."

I blinked. "I…see." I glanced over at Shirone. "What did you do?"

She pouted. "Why is it always me you ask first?"

We all just stared at her for a second. She sighed. "All right, fine. I have pictures of her dancing with me at the ball, and she's obviously having the time of her life. If I were to show them in class…"

I gave Gil an incredulous look. "She's kissed you, several times, in various public locations. How is this even blackmail?"

She reddened. "S-shut up! That's different!"

Shirone shrugged in response to my unspoken question. "I don't know, and I don't care. If it helps me see Asia in white lingerie, then I'm not too picky about the means."

I sighed. "Fair enough."

Sera blinked. "Wait, white—"

Asia flushed. "R-Ruby talked me into it." She blurted.

Sera smiled widely, giving Ruby a thumbs-up. "Excellent taste. Perhaps white lace next time~?"

Ruby hummed in thought. "No, already tried that one. It takes away from the innocent appeal."

Sera nodded seriously. "I see the problem. Have you tried cosplay?"

Ruby perked up. "No, actually. Good idea."

Asia shot me a look that begged for help. I sighed. "Could you at least wait until Asia isn't here to plot ways to embarrass her?"

They both glanced at Asia. "I suppose." Ruby mused, still considering. "But then, how will we get feedback on what she'd like?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Why would you care? You think it's even more fun if she's embarrassed to wear it."

She shrugged, crossing the room and wrapping her arms around Asia. "I do still love her, you know. If she ever told me that she didn't want to wear something, then I wouldn't make her."

"…But she won't tell you." I pointed out. "So, really, that's not much of a restriction at all."

Shirone smirked, moving over to Gil. "Well…" She murmured, sitting on her lap and running a finger over her collar, "We could always use… other methods. And if I told her to, she'd happily do whatever I wanted."

Gil shivered. "P-please, mistress." She whispered meekly, reddening. "No more maid costumes."

Sera's eyes widened. "…I-is this what they call 'gap moe'?" She asked reverently.

Shirone smirked. "It is, indeed. Now you can see why she's so fun to tease."

I decided to interrupt before Sera got any ideas. "You might want to get dressed, I'm taking us out to eat."

Sera frowned. "Where? There's nowhere good to eat in the Underworld."

I blinked. "Um… Sera… has it never occurred to you to use Teleportation to get your own take-out from the human world?"

She huffed. "Well, yes, but it's too inefficient to use for something so trivial. With the same amount of energy, I could destroy Heaven!"

I blinked again. "And… how would you know this?"

She hummed for a moment. "Um… I think I figured it out one time when I was supposed to be doing paperwork."

'…Not surprised. Not at all.' "Well, I can teach you a version meant for long-range teleportation."

She perked up. "Really? There's a spell for that? If I had known that, I would've been able to go to more Magical Girl Conventions!"

'Aaaand it just now occurs to me why no one would teach her that kind of spell. The collateral damage would be immense if she decided to re-enact a scene from one of her shows. Ah well, in for a penny, in for a pound.' "Well, it's one of my own invention. It's called ))Gate((."

Her eyes widened. "Oooooh. So that's what those green ovals are." She frowned. "Wait, if you have access to a long-range teleportation spell, then why don't you use it whenever you get lost?"

I grimaced. "I tried for a while. It's actually the reason that I developed the spell in the first place. The only problem is, if I use it while I'm Lost, I only manage to jump to somewhere within a hundred miles of the target. In any direction." Several instances where I found myself encased in solid rock or underwater came to mind. "And even if the location is within view, then I can still get momentarily distracted and lose focus for the split second it takes for my Talent to activate."

She nodded. "I see." Her eyes began to sparkle. "Then, can you take me to Magical Girl Day this August?"

I blinked. "Wait, there's a Magical Girl Day?"

She nodded seriously. "Magical Girl Day is the first and only event that celebrates all things Magical Girl. This year, for the first time ever, MGD will be celebrated for 2 days! There will be monuments to historical Magical Girls, and an in-depth lecture on the history of the genre as well as the three broad categories most magical girl shows can be loosely organized into."

Shirone glanced up from her spot on Gil's lap, looking confused. "Wait, how do Magical Girls even have enough to lecture on?"

Sera gasped. "You poor girl! I must explain the beauty that is the Magical Girl genre."

She took a deep breath. "You see, originally, all Magical Girl shows were produced by Toei Animation, so "Magical Girl" wasn't so much a genre as a series franchise. This lasted until Ashi Production's Magical Princess Momo Minky hit the air in 1982, followed by Studio Pierrot's Magical Angel Mami in 1983. The Magical Girl Warrior subgenre, of which I am a member, despite being the most well-known style of Magical Girl show in the west, didn't hit until Moon Sailor in 1992."

She finally paused to breathe, much to my relief. "The wave of shows inspired by Moon Sailor eventually subsided, but new sub-genres spawned soon in its wake. As of present, most magical girl shows can be loosely organized into three broad categories. Neo-classical, as codified by Sakura Cardcaptor. Action Hero, as codified by Lyrical Girl Magical Nanoha. And finally, Deconstructive, as codified by Magi Puella Madoka Magica."

She crossed her arms. "There is a vast wealth of information to cover, and only two days to cover it. It will be a monumental task, but they valiantly undertake it nonetheless!"

Shirone stared for a moment, before visibly restraining her laughter. "That's… nice." She managed.

Sera pouted. "What? I love Magical Girls!"

Shirone shook her head, still stifling giggles. "N-no, i-it's just… I-I never expected you to be the type to geek out about something."

Sera flushed slightly. "O-oh. Sorry."

Shirone shook her head. "No, it's really cute, actually. All of us have something we're obsessed with. Ruby is a weapons dork, Master is a mad scientist, Gil collects treasures, Asia has her love for healing, and I have Master."

Sera smiled. "Okay~! Just be sure to share Millicas-sama with me sometimes, ne?"

Shirone smirked, her tail twitching in amusement. "Sure, but I demand recompense in the form of snuggles."

Sera nodded seriously. "Indeed, snuggles are the most expensive of prices."

I sighed. "I'm glad you have that worked out… but can you two please put some clothes on?"

I smiled, waving good night to Millicas-sama and the rest of my girls. 'My girls… I like the sound of that. Honestly, they're all wonderful! And Asia… even though I though such a feat was impossible, she's still somehow even more adorable than my So-tan! Eeee! I want to see her in so many different costumes! There's Magical Girl, maid, bride, swimsuit… wait, Millicas-sama never did say what kind of being she was.'

I hummed to myself as I skipped down the hall, pondering the issue. 'I doubt she's a Fallen, she's too… untainted. I won't say innocent, because she can easily ignore most of Shirone's attempts to fluster her through course language. Not to mention, judging from the subtle glances she's sent my way, she has far too much Lust to be an Angel. So she's either a Devil, or a human. Angel cosplay it is! All those white feathers, waiting to be spoiled… adding to that innocent theme as I reach out to ravage her… mmm…'

I interrupted that train of thought before I could get too distracted. I had a report to make, after all!

Reaching an intersection, I turned left, walking down an adjacent hallway. I smiled to myself, bouncing in place once or twice. 'Aaah, these clothes really are more comfortable than Milky-tan cosplay. Sorry, Milky-tan, but I'm going to have to give you up for now. It's not you, it's me.'

I finally reached Sirzechs-chan's study, and knocked on the door. "Sirzechs! It's Magical Girl Sera!"

"Come in!" Sirzechs called.

I pushed open the door, closing it behind me. "Hello, Sirzechs! How's your week been?"

He sighed. "Long. You know that enormous tree in the middle of the Sea of Red?"

I hummed, pretending to think about it. "You mean the one with those pretty golden leaves?"

He nodded. "It was originally empty… but that changed as of three days ago. Now, there's an entire city's worth of people that inhabit it. We're not sure what they are, or why they're there, but we're keeping a close eye on them."

I nodded. "Do you need any of my Division to help?"

He shook his head. "No, it should be fine. Thanks, though."

I smiled. "Any time, Sirzechs-chan!"

He turned serious, tapping a knothole in the wood of his desk. "Now, about my son. What have you learned?"

I sighed, dropping my playful demeanor and clicking into 'assassin mode'. My expression turned cold, and my stance shifted. "What is the first thing I ever said to you?"

He thought for a moment. "We were in the middle of a battlefield, and you were killing a legion of Fallen Angels all by yourself. You managed to slaughter them all without a scratch, but you got absolutely covered in blood. Once you finished, you turned to me, looked me straight in the eye, and demanded to be told where the closest river was so that you could wash yourself off."

I nodded. "Would you like a full report, then, Commander?"

He hesitated. "…Yes. If you are comfortable doing so, then please."

I sighed internally. "Commander, my one talent is knowing how to kill people. If it helps you save his life one day, I will happily tell you what I know."

He nodded. "Very well, then. Proceed."

I took a deep breath. "Millicas Gremory. Species, Dragon. Height, 175 cm. Weight, 77 kg. Strengths include high-speed thought, advanced strategy, self-made spells, his Talent, and live battle experience. Weaknesses…" I hesitated slightly. "Cute things, emus, and kiwi."

Sirzechs blinked. "…Excuse me?"

I sighed. "He can't easily say no to cute things, he hates emus with a burning passion, and he's slightly allergic to kiwi. All three of those things could be used against him."

He frowned. "And what about weak points?"

I shook my head. "I usually see none at all. I occasionally see a few whenever he falls asleep, but otherwise I see nothing. It's odd, considering that even you have your head as a weak point."

He nodded thoughtfully. "Continue."

"Very well. From my current knowledge, possible avenues of attack include poison, sleeping drugs, treachery, and other non-contact methods."

He raised an eyebrow. "Not his girls?"

I snorted. "Sir, if you so much as touch those girls of his, he will find a way to eviscerate you in the most painful way possible. His Talent has the ability to relocate him to even abstract concepts such as 'green' or 'old'. Not to mention, every one of his girls has something he calls a Guardian configuration. From my estimation, the current versions of these configurations make that necklace of Ravel's you first tested look like a daisy chain."

The other eyebrow joined the first. "Oh? How do you know?"

I gestured to the light blue D-pad choker around my neck. "I tested it myself. Not even Celsius Cross Trigger could crack it."

His eyes narrowed. "Could he mass-produce these?"

I nodded. "Undoubtedly. He created this in under ten seconds, and his girls didn't seem too surprised."

He sighed, rubbing his eyes. "This may be more serious than I thought. Please, do go on."

I cleared my throat. "Personal characteristics, quirks and general analysis. Millicas is a genius who can undoubtedly be considered Ultimate-Class. However, he is still rather childish when it comes to some things, particularly his view on life." I closed my eyes, refusing to make eye contact for the next part. "And, while he does an admirable job of hiding it… Millicas is clinically insane. He exhibits several signs of sociopathy, and has no moral code of his own. I believe he uses the morals of those Bonded with him in order to interact with the world around him."

He raised an eyebrow, folding his hands. His face gave nothing away. "How do you figure?"

I pointed to a seemingly random knickknack on his desk, something that appeared to be half of a human skull. "As proven by the 'Ravel Incident', he had no qualms about killing whatsoever. However, ever since he has Bonded with Asia Argento, he seems to find killing to be morally reprehensible. He seems completely unaware of this change, implying that he doesn't know of his own tendency of copying morals."

Sirzechs closed his eyes. "And… if he ever needed to be stopped…"

I hesitated, before crushing my own feelings. "It is completely possible for him to snap after something he cannot cope with occurs. In that case… you have two choices. Either have his girls stop him, or kill all of his girls." I sighed. "If you were to kill them all… his mind would shatter completely. He would either go catatonic, or kill himself in grief."

He nodded quietly. "I see. Very well, then." He rubbed his eyes. "I hate that I have to ask how to kill my own son."

I grimaced. "How do you think I feel about telling you? He's the one person who's ever managed to make me feel… different."

He smirked. "Oh? Different?"

I sighed, slumping into a plush chair. "I used to think that everything I did was justified, that my conscience was clear. But now that I actually have a chance to be near him… I only feel filthy. Every time he hugs me, I can't help but imagine how easy it would be to slice his jugular. 'Snick', gone." I shivered. "It feels terrible."

Sirzechs nodded, sighing, "That's… something all of us had to go through one time or another. I refused to touch Grayfia for months after the Battle of Chera Strom. My advice is to just do what you did with Sona, seeing as that obviously worked."

I shook my head. "That's different. I never killed any children, so I never saw her as any of my victims. Even now, I can't help but see Sona as that baby I held in my arms all those years ago. Sona represents everything I fought to protect. She made it seem that all of the killing was worth it." I glanced down at my hands. "Millicas…"

I shook my head. "He reminds me of everything I sacrificed. The knight in shining armor I always wished for, the ordinary life I dream of." I closed my eyes, sighing. "The thing is… I can't see myself killing him, if I have to. And that's what horrifies me the most. Even if he is unquestionably a threat to the peace I fought to protect, even if logically he should be at the top of my hit list, I don't want to see him hurt. I just…"

Sirzechs reached across the desk, gently taking my hand. "That's what love does. It makes logic seem irrelevant."

I smiled bitterly. "Love? Earlier today, I grabbed his arm to walk with him, and had a flashback to when I did the same thing to a member of the Old Satan Faction to lead him into a trap. I remembered in vivid detail every wound I made on the man, and found myself imagining him as Millicas. I had to force myself to keep smiling, even while I was trying not to scream."

Sirzechs-taicho sighed. "What you're describing is called Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. It's quite common with survivors of the Great War. I can get you a good psychologist—"

"No." I interrupted. "I can't. My identity—"

"Would be completely safe." He finished. "The one I have in mind is a human with experience counseling war veterans. You wouldn't have to tell him which assassin you were, just that you were one. You can go disguised, under a pseudonym. The man vehemently denies the existence of the supernatural, so he won't bother looking into any slip-ups you might make. It will be fine, Serafall. You just need to talk about it."

I hesitated. "Commander… permission to make a selfish request?"

He nodded. "Proceed."

I swallowed. "Can… can I tell Millicas about me? About Hassan?"

He hesitated. "…Yes, you may. Just as long as you talk with someone about this."

I smiled at him. "Thank you, Commander."

He nodded. "Now, one more thing. Have you learned anything about his unique magics?"

I nodded, my smile fading. "Yes… and frankly, it's terrifying exactly what he can do. Just one of the two spells he taught me, ))Shadow Clone((, makes my job laughably easy. The Clones can be used for everything from reconnaissance to outright assassination, all of which can be done in half the time, due to not needing to plan an escape. The Clones disperse into untraceable and unnoticeable particles of mana, which look and act like smoke, disappearing into the air. With minimal modification on his part, I'm sure he can make the smoke poisonous, or explosive."

He frowned. "Can the Clone be distinguished from the original?"

I shook my head. "No, Sir. Not by any means I know of."

He nodded thoughtfully, touching the knot in the wood of his desk once more to deactivate the ward. I slipped back into my usual cheerful personality, disabling 'assassin mode'. Smiling widely at him, I asked, "So, Sirzechs-chan, can I please please please go to Magical Girl Day, this year? I'll even use my vacation days~…"

He frowned. "Wait, there's a Magical Girl Day?"

I gasped dramatically. "You don't know about Magical Girl Day?" I frowned. "Well, that can't be allowed. You see, Magical Girl Day is…"

I sighed, running a hand through my hair as I double-checked the address on the paper I held. I glanced up at the dingy bar and sighed. 'Damn it, Don. Why the hell did you invite me here of all places?'

I sighed once more, opening the door of The Dying Seagull and stepping inside. I was faced with no opposition as I walked over to where a man in a trench coat and fedora drank from a tankard of beer. I sat across from him, smiling. "'Sup, Dohnaseek."

He looked up, grinning. "Issei! Good to see you. I'm glad you could make it."

I shook my head. "I wouldn't miss it for the world. Now, what's the problem?"

He shrugged. "Nothing much, just figured that you might want to ask all those questions I promised to answer when we had enough time."

"Just one question." I corrected. "You just said that it would take a while to explain last time I asked."

He took a drink from his tankard, wiping his mouth on his sleeve. "Ask away, then."

I nodded. "All right, then. Let's go from the top. 'Dohnaseek', while apparently being the 'Angel of Knowledge', doesn't seem to actually exist in any of the religious texts about Angels. Neither do Raynare or Millelt."

He sighed, setting his drink down on the table. "You're right. You wouldn't find our names in any religious texts, because we refused to bear the name of an Angel. Names have power, after all, and we wanted no one to have power over us."

He took a long drink, setting the empty tankard to the side. "My name was—"

"Raziel." I finished. "Yeah, I figured. I just needed you to confirm it."

He nodded. "In Hebrew, Raziel meant 'Secret of God'. I was an Archangel, the 'Keeper of Secrets' and the 'Angel of Mysteries'. I stood close by God's throne, and therefore heard and wrote down everything that was said and discussed. From my learnings and my notes, I wrote a book. I called it the Book of Raziel the Angel. I gave the book to Adam and Eve after they partook of the Tree of Knowledge, so the two could find their way back 'home' and better understand their God."

He chuckled. "The other guys didn't like that too much, so they stole the book from Adam and threw it into the ocean."

"Dicks."

He shrugged. "They meant well. Anyway, legend has it that God Himself decided not to punish me, but instead got Rahab to dive for it and return it to the happy couple. That legend is bullshit. While God didn't punish me, he also explicitly told me not to give the book back to them. I did it anyway, and so I fell."

He grimaced. "Of course, the assholes still got the book back eventually, and Raphael gave it to Noah, who used it to build his Ark."

I raised an eyebrow. "…Seriously?"

He nodded. "Yep. That certainly pissed me off a good deal, and I made a point to… well. Never mind that. Anyway, after the Tree of Knowledge was destroyed in the war, I lost sight of my Purpose. The only power I could use from then on was the knowledge in my mind." He sighed. "I dropped from an Archangel to a lowly Fallen in less than a day."

He grinned, and, slowly, golden runes began to dance in the air behind him. The air itself turned black, forming into six pairs of ebony wings inlaid with flowing golden script. "I don't know how I can call upon my Purpose once more, but I'm certainly not complaining."

I blinked. "Wait, I thought Azazel was the only one with six pairs of wings."

He chuckled, dispersing his wings. "He was. Now there's two."

"Obviously." I agreed drily. "But what makes you two different?"

He shrugged. "Our Purpose, mostly. We just so happen to have ways of drawing tremendous amounts of power from it that few others have. I would assume that a tremendous amount of forbidden knowledge would have just been accessed by a large amount of people, in order for me to get this amount of energy out of it."

"And Azazel?"

"Azazel's Purpose changed after his fall, and he became 'the Scapegoat'. He draws power from the amount of beings who blame him for something. As you might imagine, that's a pretty damn big number."

I nodded slowly. "Okay, then. So… what now?"

He shrugged. "My boss doesn't seem to remember his 'surprise power-up' induced beatdown, and I'm not inclined to remind him. He's got this big, diabolical plan, see, and I think it would be best if I played along for now."

"And you do that why, exactly?

He smiled sadly. "Well… see, his plan has a purpose to it. He intended to unite all of the Three Factions against him, proving that it was possible to cooperate towards a common goal. To be honest, he's probably faking his sudden amnesia, so as to let me get a decent shot in on him."

I nodded slowly. "Soooo, you're going to let the guy piss off the entire supernatural world, wait for people to show up to stop him, and then help take him down?"

He nodded. "That about sums it up, yes."

I sighed, rubbing my eyes. "Dude… wasn't it just last week you were helping me score boobs?"

He smirked. "It was, indeed. You never did tell me what happened with that. Did you get some?"

I shook my head. "No, but I did get an open invitation to ogle her at any given time."

His eyes widened, and he leaned in. "Details, man, I need details!"

I smirked. "All right, all right. So, there I was…"

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