Synopsis
'The Secret World Online' is a world of cultivation, magic, kingdom building, ancient legacies, ancient powerful beasts and other strange concepts. A virtual world where a system exists to guide you through the vague prompts and skip most of the boring things. Everyone wants access to this new VRMMO.
Going into beta phase, Jack Hunt strangely receives an invite from an old friend. Not knowing what he’s doing, he gets absorbed in the virtual world as he founds his own village, meets new people and kills mystical beasts. Slowly he unravels the truth about this so-called ‘virtual world’...
This is a story that I'm working on after getting inspiration from reading 'The Lords Empire' in particular, then various other Wuxia/Cultivation novels I have read previously.
My first proper attempt at writing a long story and learning/feeling as I go, so don't expect high quality nor much editing, so if you read it thank you so much!
(Rough early chapters, it improves later on. I'll remove this message when I have rewritten them)
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11Reviews
4.2
- Writing Quality
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The story actually sounds quite interesting but every chapter I read it turns out to be more and more confusing. Real world people appear as NPS's inside the gameworld. Nothing is explained, while you get more and more information that is just not relevant for the current story progress. Lots of things don't make much sense.
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The story, and its content are solid. It's the formatting that makes it a tough read to get through. Especially in the beginning of the story, you will find that scenes change without a prior indicator, which gives a very disorienting experience. I really would like to read this entire story, but as the reviews and comments probably indicate by their lack of numbers, its a really tough read to get through. Should the author find the time to streamline his or her formatting to a more legible level such as those often seen with the more popular novels on here, then I would love to continue reading it. As it stands, I had to lower my rating because of the formatting and legibility of the novel. I think the author would greatly improve the fanbase numbers for his or her novels if they'd invest some time into researching this and applied the lessons learned to the entire novel.
Is there any use for the harem? Or is it like lord’s empire where harem is for some background and show? Please do let me know, so that i can continue to read with expectations. Thanks
truthfully I got lost just within the first 12 or so chapters, nothing is explained and the events feel extremely jumbled and out of place, the grammar it self is good and I could see this improving but I feel the whole beginning would have to be re-written once again in order for the flow of the story to be back in order
Great novel. Hope that you ake some more chapters. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Hey there! Good day for writing! If you wanted to see whether you can get paid by distributing the current work or getting financial support by writing new work, you might want to contact rebecca.review@outlook.com. A brief introduction, some sample charpters or links will be appriciated when reaching out.
Tbh i like the story a lot but I think you need to reread some chapters and fix them up some part the mc does stuff not really fitting his role are at the given moment I love the story but just some part need fixing
On chapter 55 and I'm enjoying the story so but I wish there was more details about what other people are doing, Jack's sister. That and what happens to people who play the game while pregnant.
It's not an easy case. An imbalance between gameplay and character world. I like the gameplay. I don't like reading about events outside the system.
I've read till chapter 5 or 6, and I dislike the way it's going. But that's not the problem. The problem is, the writing just feels strange. I'm not a native english speaker so I'm unable to spot the reason, but it disturbs me so much that I'm unable to read it anymore. Still, try it out, everyone has differnet tastes