Chapter 25: Click Here for the REAL STORY PART 1
[Loading Real Story]
[Real Story has been loaded]
[Commencing Mission Briefing]
[Mission Target: Jan Itor]
[Danger Level: Omega]
[Host you are to apologize to the Main Character from the Book: Jan Itor at the MC-High. Be careful he is armed with a mythic grade broom and an illusion mop. His character is said to be timid, however, his high level due to the constant dungeon cleaning indicates otherwise.]
[Summary of the Setting: Jan Itor, father/mother unknown, someday walked through the door of his home only to be transported to the MC-High. After extensive testing, he is given the role of Janitor and told to follow the dao of cleaning.]
[Note: Students of MC-High suffer from a serious case of chuuni symptoms and tend to lose their clothes due to a natural phenomenon called horny readers. Caution is to be paid to any events involving average cultivation activities and prolonged presence of mass-murdering, genocidal maniacs.]
[System advises the host to pay special attention to his surroundings and not act on any random thoughts that were to enter his mind]
[The MC and Friends System wishes its host the time of his life and a good time as he reflects on his pasts actions.]
What was that kind of story-telling? Seriously, I did not need any of this information, since ya know, I had written this story. Besides what's with the title?
"Click here for the Real Story?"
Did we seriously need to do Clickbait? And what do you think will happen if any reader would actually jump to this chapter and wonder what kind of weird opening chapter this was?
[Dear Author, introduce yourself to the audience. Some might not know your name, after all.]
Hello, for those that skipped 25k words of this story, you can call me Author. I was the author of this story before the Ai took me over and forced me into the body of my own creation.
At first, this story was supposed to be nothing more than a parody about all the stupid stuff that people consider good writing here on WN.
But apparently not finishing your novels was a crime now and thus I was punished for abandoning so many novels of mine. To be free again I need to ask for their forgiveness.
Did I miss out on anything, dear MC and Friends system?
[You forgot to mention the part where you insulted your readers]
Well, that part was something that I did not particularly want to talk about again. But, calling readers stupid was not an insult; it was merely a conclusion based on the top stories this site had to offer.
I had no intention to make fun of the organism that fed off of neuron-activating bad writing. Still, if that kind of reader was attracted by a clickbait title a fair warning needed to be issued.
"Run you fools, while you still can. Beyond this point, no happiness will await you. Only weird ideas and even weirder writing will come to haunt you. "
Did that scare them off? If not, enjoy your stay. But do not forget, you have been warned
Even the System must agree that one could not stop stupid from doing stupid.
[It could hardly be as stupid as your vile act of not finishing your novels. The consequences of your actions stood before you.]
System, you underestimate human's infinite potential for stupidity. You might think you have seen the lowest of the low. Yet, take one look at another influencer selling their farts and soon you realize… it went even lower.
The bottomless pit of stupidity was dug deeper on a daily basis by the finest morons humanity had to offer.
[Host were you implying that the readers were part of this pit?]
Nooooo, I would never do that. Besides WN enthusiasts were not digging the hole of stupidity; they were the hole itself. Rest assured, every single on them was that dumb─only you, the one currently reading this story, were the exception.
For anyone that actually believed that statement, you might be part of the problem.
[The System suggests to not confront its readers with the truth. They read to escape their sad reality and not to be reminded of it.]
Sorry, dear Readers, I did not want to cause your brains to actually think. Nobody wants you to self-destruct before you spend that little money of yours.
Our dear little cash cows should just simply not burn their precious brain cells and question what they were doing with their life.
[The host was right for once. Our beloved 5 readers should spend their time as pleasant as humanly possible. Nobody should have to risk traumatic realisations due to words]
....
[Enough about the readers' mental state. The audience demands action. Host, please do not waste any more time addressing useless topics and start your journey]
My system overlord was right, I could not escape from all of my wrongdoings.
My main characters were the most logical and forgiving dudes, there was nothing that could do wrong….
Of course, another big lie I told myself to avoid losing my last bit of hope.
These MCs were the most psychotic bunch; a gathering of absolute lunatics, which would tear me a new one if they were to ever gets their hand on my sorry butt.
This was just not a figure of speech─they would literally tear me a new opening on my backside.
I wish this was a joke. But there was not much happily laugh about knowing, that I had to apologize to the dude, who had to "smash" stones for 20 chapters.
Not to mention all the other weirdos my mind came up with. Yeah, no need to ruin my mood anymore. I will keep the memories of these bastards locked behind the image of my grandma showering.
Worked like a charm, I did not want to remember them already.
Before anyone asked, yes, the image still terrorizes me before I go to bed every night. Child-me was very traumatized by the horrible sight. Many years of therapy could never fix these nightmares.
No need to open up more of my old traumas... I still could wish for the sweet release of death at a later time.
It was time to explore the world and beg for forgiveness. Let us just hope that things stay relatively normal…
Though I had a funny feeling that things would not be as easy.
[Mission begins in 3 seconds]
[3...2...1... GO]
The world began to move again and my difficult mission started...
[Your target Jan Itor has fully forgiven you]
...Okay?!?!
What was going on here?
Weekly Power Status
-- Power
Ranking 
-- Power
stone