Chapter 4: 4.ABYSS
If evil is the opposite of kindness, beauty is the opposite of ugliness, and the truth is the contrast of falsehood, then what is the opposite of a human?
There is no answer to this question. Some might say ghost—others would say, god!
....
Finishing the last piece of chicken on my plate, I burped in contentment.
" That was delicious, madam Pomfrey," I said to the matron
" Headmaster has returned from his work. He will be here in a few minutes and I want you to say everything to him. "Said Pomfrey seriously
I groaned irritatedly thinking about that old coot.
' Why the fuck does he care, he should have been dancing in joy with those marauders. Whatever, I have to tell a logical explanation to him without involving rosier and the other Slytherins. I will settle the score with rosier and others personally, but I have to see that this issue doesn't become bigger. That damn old man will try to make this big to humiliate Slytherin ' I thought seriously about ways to make the impending conversation finish quickly.
Footsteps echoed in the corridor as dumbledore, Slughorn and McGonagall entered the hospital wing.
Slughorn's here as he's my house head and McGonagall is here, maybe because she's the deputy headmistress.
' Merlin's saggy balls ' I groaned seeing all my least favourite people in the castle.
" Good evening, Severus. How are you feeling now? " asked dumbledore while sitting on a chair beside my bed.
" I will live, headmaster. As you know I have been a regular visitor to madam Pomfrey since my first year. Thanks to the brave lions of Gryffindor" I said mockingly.
McGonagall cringed hearing my words, Slughorn stood dumbly in his place like he was forced to be here, while dumbledore was still smiling in that annoying way he does
" Can you tell me what happened to you, Severus? Professor Slughorn found you in an abandoned classroom in the dungeons this morning. You were badly injured, my boy. " said dumbledore while ignoring my taunt at him.
" I was experimenting on a spell and it backfired. I was knocked to the wall and hit my head pretty hard. I blacked out and the next thing, I know I'm here" I lied with a calm face.
I know that everyone in the room knew it was a lie, but they can't do anything about it.
" Poppy said some of your injuries were due to some nasty spells, Severus. Spells that we don't teach in Hogwarts. You don't have to be afraid, just say the truth and I will see that the ones responsible are punished accordingly to the school rules" said dumbledore seriously.
I cracked up hearing his hypocritical words. Punished accordingly, my arse.
" I was bullied and humiliated for the last 5 years by those precious marauders of yours. Why weren't they punished accordingly? Are these rules written this morning, headmaster? " I asked angrily.
" No need to get angry, Severus. James and his friends never meant to harm you. They were just harmless childish pranks" said dumbledore calmly
I clenched my fist in rage. I felt like casting the killing curse at him right this instant and my magic boiled up in me threatening to unleash.
But, I controlled it and took a breath to calm myself.
' Not now, sev. Not now, the time will come ' I thought while maintaining a calm face.
" I suffered many bruises, fractures, concussions, cracked bones, and public humiliations due to their so-called pranks during my 5 years here and the reason being I'm a Slytherin or I have greasy hair or because I exist. What crime did I commit to suffer these things from the age of 11, headmaster? " I asked calmly looking into dumbledore's eyes.
Everyone looked down in shame except dumbledore who was about to speak. But, I didn't give him that chance.
" Tell me, headmaster. If the reason I had to suffer all this is that I exist as said by your golden boy potter, then isn't the one called dark lord who kills muggle-borns because they exist are similar? What difference is between you and them? Now, if you can leave me alone. I would like to take some rest and recover to attend the end-of-term feast tomorrow" I said to everyone and looked dumbledore in the eye.
I felt a mild pain in my head like something is trying to drill into my head, but the feeling vanished as soon as it came.
Dumbledore stood up from his chair and gave me a last glance filled with caution, interest and a little fear, I think and left
" I apologize for the behaviour of my students as their house head, Mr.snape. Rest assured, I will not let them continue their cruel pranks anymore. Get well soon " said McGonagall and followed dumbledore out
" Get well soon, Mr.snape," said Slughorn and hurried out of the hospital wing.
I huffed in irritation at Slughorn, he never did anything to help me as I was a half-blood and of no value to him.
" Why are you looking at me like that, madam Pomfrey? " I asked the matron as she was scrutinising me for some time.
" You've changed. In the past, you would lash out in anger at the headmaster every time, but now you were calm. You said some harsh words which were true, but you said them in calm. " said Pomfrey seriously.
I sighed as Pomfrey knew right away. Well, she was the only one who treats me like a human in this huge castle, excluding lily.
I squashed the thought of lily in anger. I don't want to think about her anymore.
" I don't want to waste any more of my time on him. I know he will let them scot-free anyway, so why should I waste my breath? No one cares about me anyway " I said nonchalantly.
I felt Pomfrey run her hand over my head gently and wrap her arms around me in a hug. I froze at the sudden gesture.
" I care about you, Severus. You are like my son. So, don't say that no one cares about you. I will always love you" said Pomfrey lovingly.
I tried to keep the tears threatening to spill out of my eyes at her words. I slowly relaxed in her arms and closed my eyes feeling the loving embrace of Pomfrey, which I missed for a long time.
' I love you too, poppy ' I thought as tears flowed from my eyes.
....
[ LILY POV ]
After Severus disappeared around the corridor. I walked into the common room and ignored the chatter of the students and climbed the stairs to my dorm.
I flopped onto my bed and sat numbly as the words Severus said reverberated in my ears.
' Did I smile ?' I questioned myself and replayed everything that happened at the lake.
No matter how many times I try to remember I don't think I smiled. I placed my head in my hands and groaned in irritation since Severus never lies, but I don't remember smiling.
I heard footsteps near the room entrance and looked up to see mary coming inside.
" You okay, Lily?" asked Mary in concern.
" Yeah" I muttered weakly
" You don't look okay to me. Are you sad about snape? Did snape say something to you outside ?" asked mary while sitting beside me on the bed.
" He said I smiled," I said to her
"I don't get it," said Mary confusedly.
" He said I smiled when potter hung him upside down at the lake. But, I didn't smile" I said
" You smiled, Lily, "said mary
" No, I did not. I would never do that" I said seriously.
" I saw you smile. At first, I thought you wouldn't but I know what I saw and I saw you smiling as potter flirted with you in front of snape" said mary.
I froze as her words made me remember feeling happy at potter's flirting and maybe a tiny bit due to seeing Severus like that.
' What I have done ' I thought as I broke down in tears.
...........
[ DUMBLEDORE POV ]
I hurried towards my office after exiting the hospital wing.
Footsteps echoed behind me as Horace and Minerva joined me.
" To my office, Minerva," I said to Minerva who nodded in answer.
" Horace, why don't you ask some of your Slytherins what happened to Mr. snape yesterday ?" I said to Horace, who nodded and hurried to the dungeons.
After entering my office, I slumped down into the nearest chair and heaved a sigh of relief.
Minerva sat in another chair and was looking towards me dubiously, while Fawkes landed on my shoulder and stroked his head against my cheek in comfort.
" What happened,albus? Why did you run away in such a hurry? " asked Minerva
" I did it again, Minerva," I said sadly
" Did what? Care to elaborate" said Minerva.
" The moment I entered the infirmary, I felt something. The feeling kept growing the longer I stayed in there and the closer I was to Mr.snape. Did you notice that Mr.snape was acting unusually? "I asked
" He usually is very angry in the infirmary, but today he got angry but he reined it in. I wanted to see what he was concealing, so I tried looking in his mind...." I said
" You performed legilimency on a student. How dare you, albus? " shouted Minerva angrily and stood up from her seat.
" You can shout all you want at me at a later time, Minerva. But, first, listen to me." I Said
" I will not leave this be and I will not forgive you, albus," said Minerva with barely concealed anger in her voice and sat down.
" I tried looking in his mind, but I couldn't. " said dumbledore.
" what do you mean, you couldn't?" asked Minerva knowing, he was one of the best in mind arts.
" There was nothing to see, his entire mind was dark. It was like the abyss and I felt the presence of dark magic" I said seriously.
" Those are some serious allegations, you are making on a child, Albus. Maybe you are mistaken " Said Minerva seriously.
I sat in silence for a few seconds and sighed.
" Maybe, you are right. Looks like I'm getting old. Well, you are dismissed, Minerva" I said
" I didn't forget about you trying legilimency on a student. I will talk about this in the next board meeting" said Minerva seriously and left the room.
I stood up from the chair and walked towards the window overlooking the great lake.
I looked at the still waters of the great lake and the pitch-black darkness deep down in the lake.
I closed my eyes remembering the darkness I saw in Severus' mind, the suffocating pressure of helplessness and the eye which stared back at me
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