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Chapter 41: Feelings of Love

It was a little past seven that night, and the seven members of the student

council had just walked twenty minutes from the cottage to a nearby shrine. After

climbing the long stone staircase and passing under the gate, they found themselves

in front of the main shrine at the end of the winding stone pathway. Countless stalls

lined the pavement, and the area was bustling and lively.

"Whoa… This is the real deal!"

Masachika was expecting this to be more of a small, local festival kind of thing, but

there were far more stalls and people here than he could have ever imagined. Touya, wearing

a yukata, proudly smirked and boasted:

"Surprised you, huh? The firework show is pretty spectacular as well, if I do say so

myself. They even bring the portable shrine out the front door and do a lap around the building

during the show."

"Wow, seriously?"

Even the girls in the group seemed to be both impressed and taken aback. Incidentally,

every one of them was robed in a gorgeous yukata. I am so happy I brought a yukata with

me, thought Masachika as he looked at them.

I'm glad I got Grandpa to send this to me. If I hadn't, I'd have been the only one here

in normal clothes at this massive festival. It would have felt so awkward.

He let out a sigh of relief that he'd managed to not stick out like a sore thumb, although

barely. But the girls looked stunning. Chisaki, Yuki, and Ayano were gorgeous with their

traditional black hair and features, but that probably went without saying. Alisa and Maria,

however, were extremely beautiful as well, even though they did seem somewhat like foreign

tourists renting and experiencing kimonos for the very first time. The only drawback was

that the large belts would usually make women like them with huge busts look fat…but that

seemed to have been taken care of when a certain someone helped them get dressed—that

certain someone being Ayano, and her incredible skills as a maid were really showing. But,

well…there was only so much technique could do to help someone who was as blessed as

Maria…

"Anyway, how about we walk around and check out the stalls in the meantime?"

"Good idea."

They decided to check out each stall in order…but after just a few minutes went by, a

group of random guys came over and started talking to them. Perhaps this was an adverse

effect of being surrounded by beautiful young women.

"Hey, ladies. You here on vacation?"

"Whoa! Check out the cuties!"

They appeared to be a group of six university students at first glance. Each one of them

was dressed casually and carrying nothing with them, which made it obvious that they'd

come here for reasons other than the festival. Both Masachika and Touya stepped forward

the moment the guys started talking to them, but there was no way two guys could fully block

off five girls from six aggressive university students. The interlopers immediately split in

the middle and approached the girls from all sides, creating a half circle to block them from

leaving—as if they were used to doing this. They then checked the girls out like they were

evaluating their worth.

"What do you guys want? They're not interested in whatever you want to do," Masachika

clearly stated.

"Exactly. We came here to enjoy the festival, so you guys need to get out of our way,"

Touya added with his arms crossed in front of his massive, imposing body. However, they

didn't budge and instead laughed foolishly.

"Come on, don't be like that. We're locals. We can show you guys around."

"You're freakin' adorable. What's your name?"

"Yo, is that your real hair color? Oh, wait. Can you even speak Japanese?"

While two of them dealt with Masachika and Touya, the others tried striking up

conversation with the girls in an overfamiliar manner. Masachika was overcome with disgust

that no words could describe. He and Touya communicated using only their eyes, and they

swiftly slid to each side, boxing out the guys while glaring at them.

"Seriously, do you think you could stop? You are scaring them, so you need to back off.

We'll call the police if we need to."

"Duuude, you're being way too dramatic."

"We aren't trying to make anyone feel scared. Hey, tell me your name. Bonjour? Hola?

Guten Tag?"

One of the university students joked around, trying to get Alisa's and Maria's attention

from where they stood behind Masachika. But right as Masachika began to clench his teeth

in frustration, Alisa and Maria started shouting in Russian.

G o b a c k t o the f o r e s t, Monkey!

"Обезьяна, возвращайся назад в лес!"

E w ! G r o s s!

"Фуу, противно!"

"…?!"

The scathing Russian almost made Masachika burst into laughter, despite knowing this

was not the time for that.

"Whoa. What language is that? Hilarious."

But one of the guys just laughed it off as he reached out to touch Alisa. Masachika

instantly felt something snap inside him. His desire for wanting to end this peacefully had

immediately disappeared as he grabbed the guy's wrist and squeezed it as hard as he could

while scowling.

"Don't touch her."

There was no warmth in his chilling voice, making his ill intentions more than clear. The

student council members who weren't familiar with this side of him were left speechless.

Even the foolishly laughing university student stopped smiling and took a step back, but the

guy almost immediately narrowed his eyes and lowered his voice to overcompensate for his

embarrassing reaction and threatened:

"The hell's your problem, man? You better let me go if ya know what's good for ya."

The air between them grew tense, the volatile emotions spreading among the other

university students until all six of their silly expressions twisted with malice. Touya quietly

prepared himself, Yuki secretly clenched her fists, and Ayano shot three mechanical pencils

out of her sleeves before catching them in between her fingers. Tensions were high, and the

situation was only getting worse…when all of a sudden, two of the university students on

the left suddenly collapsed without making a sound. The instant everyone simultaneously

looked over to see what happened, the two guys next to Masachika both took a swift strike to

the neck and collapsed as well. The one who'd knocked out four guys in mere seconds was

none other than the vice president of the student council, who had remained silent until now.

"Huh…?"

"What the…?"

The remaining two guys were dumbstruck as they backpedaled, still unsure what was

going on, but Chisaki simply walked right up to them and swung two hooks at lightning

speed, hitting their jaws and knocking them unconscious just like the rest. Within seconds,

six men were lying on the ground, causing a stir among the crowd that had started to gather

around. Nevertheless, Chisaki paid no attention to the spectators as she grabbed two guys

per hand by the collar and looked over at Touya.

"Sorry, Touya. But do you think you could grab those two for me?"

"…Sure," Touya agreed with a somewhat complicated expression, unable to decline his

girlfriend's request. After making sure he picked up the other two by the collar, Chisaki

casually suggested:

"Sorry, but you guys go on ahead. I'm gonna break, fold, and stack these somewhere

so they won't get in anybody's way."

"Those don't really sound like verbs you use with humans… 'Break'? 'Fold'…?"

"What? You wanna watch?"

"I'll pass," Masachika replied instantly with a straight face.

"If you say so," she said, raising an eyebrow before disappearing into the thickets behind

the stalls along with six unconscious university students. Masachika slowly looked away as

the darkness of the woods started to look like the entrance to hell.

"Phew…"

After exhaling and cooling his head, he faced the remaining four and deeply bowed.

"I'm sorry. I ended up putting everyone in danger instead of actually diffusing the

situation."

There wasn't even a hint of rage left as he apologized for letting his emotions get the

best of him. Alisa blinked at him as if she was taken aback for a moment, but she almost

immediately placed a hand on his shoulder in a fluster and stammered:

"Y-you're fine. You tried to protect us, and that made me really happy. So lift your head

back up, okay?"

The other three began to join in as well.

"Nobody was bothered by what you did. Something tells me that they were not going

to listen to reason."

"You were very brave. I quivered."

"You don't need to apologize for a thing. ♪ You were so cool! Now, come on. Let's

enjoy the festival."

Just like her little sister, Maria patted Masachika on the shoulder as well. But when he

lifted his head back up, he was met with Alisa's worried gaze and Maria's comforting smile.

Maria then took his hand along with Alisa's and added:

"Come on, they have cotton candy over there. ♪"

"Y-yes…?"

"Huh? No, uh… I'm not really a big fan of cotton candy."

"Really? Then it looks like it's just you and me, Alya. Come on."

He'd immediately refused without thinking,so Masachika watched Maria and Alisa head

over to the cotton-candy stall and started to regret how he had accidentally blown off Maria,

who was being extremely thoughtful. But he wasn't yet ready to enjoy the festival. He

couldn't switch emotions that quickly. Even though the four of them may have forgiven him,

he had let his emotions get the best of him nevertheless and made the situation worse, only to

have someone else save his ass. So he was still reflecting on his rashness and beating himself

up over it.

"Don't let it bother you so much. You were so badass," Yuki whispered after swiftly

slipping by his side as if she could tell he was down.

"Thanks…"

"Seriously, don't worry about it. You got mad for all the right reasons. I bet Alya's heart

was racing when she saw you like that."

"What are you even talking about?"

Masachika may have sighed in a fed-up manner, but having a nerdy exchange with his

sister like this actually made him feel a little better. Unfortunately, that reminded him of

exactly what he wanted to say to her as well, and he swiftly shot her a sharp glare.

"Wait a second. What happened to our truce you proposed?"

It was as if his eyes were saying, "What were you doing, provoking Alya in the kitchen

after king's game?" But Yuki looked back at him like he was an idiot.

"What? The only reason you make truces is to get your opponent to lower their guard

so you can strike when they least expect it."

"Damn… She's right…"

"Besides, you should be thanking me for giving you two a chance to get closer. That's

some 4D chess right there."

"What makes you think I even want that?"

"Listen to yourself. You two have been getting really close this entire summer break.

Am I wrong?"

"Er… That's… No…"

Curiosity sparkling in her eyes, she poked him in the side with her elbow as Masachika

recalled the time he had spent with Alisa during this summer break…but all he could

remember was her angry face, and he froze with a question mark over his head.

I remember being sent straight to heaven, being kicked and punched, and…uh…? We

haven't been getting along at all. If anything, our relationship has gotten worse…

No matter how long he racked his brain, he could only remember the mistakes he had

made—to the point that he was about to start worrying that she was sick of him, instead of

them getting closer.

Wait… No way… Have I been a real piece of crap this entire summer break?

A sense of gloom hung over his head as he watched the Kujou sisters slowly returning

with cotton candy in hand.

"Hey, uh… I'm going to go make sure things are good between Alya and me," he

whispered.

Yuki rolled her eyes at him as if she could see the panic on his face and replied:

"All right, enjoy. I guess I'll take Ayano over to the chocolate covered–banana stall and

teach her how to really please a master."

"What? No."

"…I'm kidding. Hmm… I think I'm going to go over to the katanuki stall and make

the owner cry."

"Don't be too mean."

"Oh, right. Here, I'll lend you my camera. Come on, Ayano. Let's go."

"As you wish."

While he was watching them mirthfully make their way over to the die-cut candy street

stall, Alisa and Maria returned, but when he looked in their direction, hisjaw almost dropped.

"Whoa…"

"…? What?"

"You two look very picturesque even though all you're doing is holding cotton candy."

"Oh my. ♪ Really?"

"…Hmph."

Maria placed a hand on her cheek and smiled while Alisa frowned as if she didn't know

how to respond, but Masachika was being genuine. He wasn't merely saying this to get on

Alisa's good side. Yukata and cotton candy. This simple combination was extremely

charming, slowly guiding Masachika's finger to the camera's shutter button.

"Hey, come on… If you're going to take a picture, at least tell us first."

"Sorry. I didn't want to ruin the moment. I can delete it if you want me to, though."

"No… It's fine…but my mouth might have been wide open and…"

"Don't worry. You could make any expression you want and still look good."

"O-oh…"

Alisa swiftly looked away as if she didn't know how to react and began munching on

her cotton candy. Maria grinned as she watched her sister's reaction, but Alisa immediately

shot her a piercing stare, so she spoke up, changing the subject.

"By the way, where did Yuki and Ayano go?"

"The katanuki stall."

"'Katanuki'?"

"Oh, uh… How should I explain? You get this rectangular candy mold with the shape

of something like an animal outlined in the middle, and you have to use a toothpick or a

needle to carve it out. If you manage to do that without damaging the rectangular mold, you

get a prize."

"Wow. ♪ That sounds like a lot of fun."

"I wouldn't really recommend it to beginners. You could spend hours on it without even

realizing it."

"Really? Then I suppose we should save it for last."

"Yeah, definitely. First, let's check out everything we want to see, then if we have time,

we can try it out," he suggested to Maria, when he suddenly noticed Alisa staring at the

goldfish-scooping game at a nearby stall. Incidentally, the cotton candy she had bought only a

few minutes ago had magically turned into a stick void of any sweet cotton. Oooh, mysterious.

"Alya, do you want to try to catch some goldfish?"

"It does look like fun."

"Then come on. What about you, Masha?"

This is my chance to show I'm not a total scumbag, he thought while shifting his gaze

to Maria.

"I still have a lot left to eat, so I think I'll just watch," she replied, holding up her cotton

candy.

"Can you hang on to this for me, then?"

"Sure. ♪ Right, let me take your camera, too."

"Oh, great. Thanks a lot."

After Alisa handed over her cotton-candy stick and Masachika entrusted her with Yuki's

camera, they headed straight over to the goldfish-scooping game, paid the middle-aged

shopkeeper two hundred yen, and received three scoopers and a small bowl before squatting

in front of the inflatable pool. That was when Masachika immediately realized that Alisa was

an amateur. Seeing her hold the water-filled bowl in her hand was already a dead giveaway.

That was going to increase the distance she had to scoop and increase the amount of damage

the scoop was going to take. Plus, sticking your head over the water was a bad idea as well,

since the shadow would scare the fish away. Furthermore, trying to catch fish that were

running away would—

"Ah…," Alisa softly muttered after almost immediately destroying her first scoop. Out

of the corner of his eye, Masachika watched her eyes narrow as she grabbed her second

scoop. Meanwhile, he filled his bowl to the brim with water before placing it in the inflatable

pool to float. After using the bowl's shadow to guide the fish just where he wanted them, he

swiftly pierced the water at an angle with his scoop, and without slowing down, he circled

it under water before scooping a fish into his bowl.

"Gotcha."

He did the same thing for the next goldfish and the next one after that.

"Wow, Kuze. You're amazing ♪," Maria cheered in delight. It was that genuine praise

that fueled his drive and made his skills shine even more brilliantly than before. All he'd

been trying to do at first was show off a little so he could give Alisa some advice, but Maria's

unexpected praise ended up making him feel so good that he started scooping up three to

four goldfish at a time. By the time he ran out of all three paper scoops, his bowl was almost

overflowing with goldfish. There were at least thirty.

"Wow. ♪ What a performance. ♪"

"Heh…"

He smirked and glanced at Alisa…only to find her clearly irritated and staring at her

empty bowl. His face instantly froze.

What was I thinking?! I completely dominated her! …I mean, it wasn't a competition,

but still…!

That was when he finally realized that he'd gotten so into the game that he had genuinely

forgotten the original goal: make Alisa happy. What ever happened to giving her a few

pointers so that she'd like him more?

"Uh… Alya, do you want me to teach you how I did it?"

"…No, I'm fine. Thank you very much."

Although late, he still offered to give her some advice, but Alisa succinctly refused,

handed the ripped paper scoops back to the shopkeeper, and stood back up. Masachika

immediately declined to keep the fish and followed her as regret slowly swallowed his heart.

"H-hey, they're doing water-balloon fishing over there if you want to try it out?"

He promptly invited her to play another game at a nearby stall to redeem himself. It

seemed to have a thirty-second time limit per one hundred yen. The water tank was ovalshaped with a hollow center, like a stadium'stracks, and balloons of all different colors gently

floated in the water. Maria instantly raised her hand when she saw it.

"Oh, me! I want to try. ♪"

"…I guess I'll try, too."

"Then let's all do it together."

They squatted side by side in front of the tank, each with a string in hand. Attached to the

end of each string was a four-prong hook. After the shopkeeper gave them a countdown, they

used that tool to try and hook the rubber bands attached to the water balloons. However…

"Ah…!"

"Ah! Mmm…!"

Alisa and Maria were having an extremely hard time with the lightweight, unreliable

hooks. For the most part, the hooks wouldn't face the right direction, and if they did get it

around the rubber band, the hook would almost immediately come undone. Twenty seconds

had gone by, and neither of them had gotten even one water balloon. Masachika began to

focus on the girls to his sides and wait for his chance.

They're having a rough time… Perfect. Now it's my time to shine. I'll catch one balloon

for each of us to make up for the goldfish-scooping game!

Burning with motivation, he locked his eyes on the surface of the water. He bided his

time until there were only four seconds left, when…

Now's my chance!

…he swiftly hooked onto a rubber band facing the opposite direction of the flow and

pulled up at an angle. He then waited for the exact moment that the string tightened and the

hook was locked in to snag two more rubber bands nearby.

"Gotcha!"

"Huh?! Three?!"

"Wow! That was amazing!"

He caught three water balloons simultaneously just like he planned and grinned from ear

to ear with evident satisfaction as the stopwatch began to beep at the thirty-second mark…

Right at that moment, the hook also snapped off the rope, unable to hold the weight, and all

three water balloons thereupon fell back into the water.

"Huh?!"

There was a loud splash as water flew into the air, landing onto both Masachika's legs

and the girls'.

"O-oh gosh! I'm so sorry!"

The guilt from getting their beautiful yukata wet wastoo much. He promptly pulled out a

handkerchief, but he hesitated to hand it to them when he had been using it to wipe his hands

off earlier. He didn't have to make the choice himself, though, because Alisa and Maria each

took out their own handkerchiefs and began wiping themselves dry.

"Sorry…"

"It's fine. Not like you did it on purpose."

"We hardly even got wet, so please don't worry about it. ♪ You should worry more about

yourself."

"O-oh, uh… Thanks."

Maria began to wipe Masachika's yukata with her handkerchief, which made him feel

a little bad in a way but also grateful. The shopkeeper ended up giving him all three water-

balloon yo-yos that he'd caught, so they each got one as planned, but…he felt more guilty

about getting their yukata soaked than happy.

I-it's not over yet! I can still redeem myself!

After changing his mindset, he fired himself up once more to show off…but all his effort

ended in vain. At the shooting gallery, he managed to shoot down the doll that Maria wanted,

but its face got damaged when it hit the ground, making things awkward. When he tried to

treat them to stir-fried noodles to make up for getting their yukata wet, the cook decided

everyone needed to hear his wild speculation on what kind of relationship the three of them

were in while unloading every vulgar word you could think of and then some. Masachika

splendidly got first prize, a video game, at the ring toss, but the kid behind him immediately

burst into tears because there was apparently nothing left that the kid wanted anymore; thus,

he gave the boy the video game, which at least got him to stop crying. Nevertheless…there

was no way to fix what was broken: the mood. There was no way Masachika could make

the festival fun again.

"…I'm really sorry," he apologized to Maria and Alisa after seeing the kid's parents off.

The couple held their child's hand, bowing and thanking Masachika as they left.

"…? What are you apologizing for? You did a good thing. ♪"

"No, it's just…something keeps happening, or I end up messing things up. I'm ruining

the festival for you guys," said Masachika in a self-deprecating manner.

"Nothing that's happening is your fault, Masachika. Come on. Eat something sweet, and

cheer up." Alisa smiled in a slightly troubled manner. Her eyes then wandered for a few

moments before she took the chocolate banana in her hands and thrust it at him.

"O-oh, wow. Thanks…?"

A few thoughts flashed through his mind. Ah, an indirect kiss. But the Madonna is

watching. But even then, he almost reflexively chomped down on the chocolate banana

hovering before his eyes. Unfortunately, however, he took a bite right out of the middle to

avoid an indirect kiss and…

"Ah…!"

…the fruit snapped in two where he bit, and the top half ended up falling. Alisa promptly

reached out to catch it, but it bounced off the top of her hand and landed on the ground.

"Ah…"

"Ack! Sorry!"

"Oh my. So close."

Maria quickly crouched and picked up the banana as Masachika froze; he'd messed up,

and there was no one to blame but himself.

"How about we go wash our hands while we throw this away?"

"…Good idea. We'll be right back, Masachika."

"Huh? Hold on. Let me come with—"

"Wait here."

He offered to go with them, since he wasn't comfortable letting two young ladies go off

on their own, but Alisa was stern and her message clear. That was when he realized that there

was probably another reason why they were going to wash their hands together.

"All right… Take your time."

He also realized how insensitive his comment had been and began to feel guilty yet

again. Once he saw them off with an indescribable emotion swelling in his heart, Yuki and

Ayano suddenly approached him from the opposite direction.

"My apologies for keeping you waiting, Sir Masachika."

"Oh, did you two enjoy the katanuki?"

"Yep. The shopkeeper almost started crying after I perfectly carved Nyarlathotep and

Shub-Niggurath out of the mold, so I decided to show him some mercy and call it a day."

"I can't even imagine what those molds looked like, but I'm sure they were disgustingly

difficult." He sighed apathetically.

"What's wrong, my dear brother? Did something happen?"

Yuki raised an eyebrow, noticing that Masachika seemed down.

"Yuki… I'm done… I just can't anymore…"

"O-oh, what exactly happened? You look like you're about to cry."

Yuki's lips pulled back while Ayano rapidly blinked, because it wasn't common for

Masachika to expose vulnerability like this. Before he could explain, though, Touya and

Chisaki suddenly showed up. Masachika sighed once more, then got it together.

"Sorry to keep you guys waiting," Chisaki said as the pair approached.

"Hey. Sorry about all that. Because of me, you had to…"

"Huh? Oh, don't worry about it. If anything, it gave me an excuse to spend time alone

with Touya and check out the festival, so I'm happy."

"Awww.You two are so close."

"Ahem… We are a couple, after all."

"That you are. Giggle."

The couple bashfully smiled with sparkles in their eyes. They looked so happy that it

was hard to believe any acts of violence had occurred that day. Masachika snorted at the

sight and shrugged. After that, the five of them stood around and chatted for a while until

Alisa and Maria finally returned. They spent the next few minutes talking about walking

around together when all of a sudden, a thunderous drumming could be heard from within

the main shrine.

"Oh, sounds like the portable shrine's here…which also means the fireworks show is

about to start."

And just like Touya announced, three portable shrines of all different sizes were exiting

the main shrine and traveling down the middle of the stone pathway while spectators moved

to the side to get out of their way. As they stepped to the side as well, Masachika inwardly

sighed.

Fireworks, huh? Guess that means the festival's almost over as well… I made a real

ass of myself today.

He wanted to make up for all the things he'd done to Alisa, but he only ended up adding

to the list of things he needed to apologize for, making him unbelievably depressed. Then

he suddenly felt a tug on the elbow of his yukata's sleeve, and when he turned to his side,

Alisa was frowning and looking up at him.

"Stop beating yourself up. I told you before, right? You know…"

"…?"

Alisa fell silent as if she was somewhat worried that the other five on Masachika's

opposite side would hear them. Just saying "you know" was far too abstract for Masachika,

though, and he had absolutely no idea what she was talking about.

"You know…when we went out together the other day…and were in front of your

place…"

"In front of my place…?"

Even after getting another hint from his fidgeting partner, he still couldn't figure out

what she was talking about.

When we went out together? In front of my place? In the apartment's hallway? Did

something happen then?

Masachika tried to trace his memories, his eyes searching the sky for clues, until Alisa

suddenly shouted, "Ugh!" and poked his cheek with her index finger. "You really don't

understand women at all."

"Huh. Oh? Sorry?"

He still blinked in confusion while his cheek was poked by an angry woman with scornful

eyes…when she suddenly cracked something of a smile and began to scrutinize his face in

an amused manner.

"So even you sometimes get depressed over a few little mistakes, huh?"

"What? Of course I do."

He arched a brow asif to say, "Who doesn't?" but Alisa pouted back at him in frustration.

"Oh, 'of course,' huh? Everything always goes well for you, despite being so laid-back

about it all, so I thought that maybe you didn't care if things didn't go your way."

"If that's how I appear, that's because that's how I present myself, but I actually get

depressed just like everyone else does."

However, he almost immediately regretted what he just said right after the words came

out of his mouth.

How stupid am I? How isshowing her how pathetic I can be going to help me in any way?

"Oh?" Alisa muttered as she took a half-step closer to him, slightly nestling up to him

and brushing against his arm. She then gently wrapped her hand around his while still facing

forward.

"…? A-Alya…?"

He was struck with panic when she suddenly held his hand, but she didn't even glance

in his direction as she quietly said:

"…You don't have to pretend around me anymore."

"Huh?"

"I want to be there for you, too. I will be there for you by your side to support you. I

mean, I am your partner, aren't I?" Alisa pouted, seemingly in a foul mood, but anybody

could see that she was only trying to hide her embarrassment. She then continued to express

her frustrations, maybe not realizing how obvious she was being.

"I'm always the one being helped, and I don't like that. So you better let me help you

out sometimes, too."

"Pfft! Is that an order?" Masachika laughed at the contrast between her adorable request

and the harsh way she put it. Immediately, Alisa shot him a piercing glare and started digging

her fingernails into his hand she was holding.

"Shut up and stop laughing."

"Ow, ow, ow. Sorry."

However, he couldn't help but crack a smile, even while apologizing through the pain,

and her unnatural yet straightforward words warmed the darkness in his heart.

"Thanks. Just knowing you feel that way makes me happy, and that's more than I could

ever ask for," he softly admitted as he gazed directly into her eyes. And that was how he

really felt. Alisa's words and actions saved him from his self-loathing. Nevertheless, Alisa

herself seemed to take what he said the wrong way.

"What's your problem? You're still going to be like that after everything I said?"

She frowned, but this time, she was truly upset. Masachika was at a loss for a few

moments until he realized that she probably thought he was refusing her help and instantly

began to panic.

"You've got the wrong—"

"Whatever," Alisa hissed in a soft voice as she dropped his hand and turned around.

"H-hey…?"

"Don't follow me."

She left him with those words before briskly walking away. He reached out to stop her,

but it was already too late as his hand only touched air.

"Uh…"

Should I go after her? Masachika wondered, when all of a sudden, someone else tugged

at his sleeve from behind. He turned around to find Yuki and noticed the portable shrine was

getting closer as well.

"Masachika, hand me my camera."

"Hmm? Oh, right."

After giving her the digital camera, she promptly took a picture of the approaching

shrine.

"President Touya, Vice President Chisaki, let me get a picture of you two together."

"Wait. Really?"

"Oh, wow. Thanks, Suou."

Once she took their picture,she got the othersto join in and started taking multiple photos

of the group. Soon after Masachika absentmindedly began to watch, Alisa finally returned.

"Oh, hey. Welcome…back…?"

He was relieved to see her…while also puzzled to see what she was holding. It was a

white foam take-out box, and peeking out from under the slightly ajar lid were eight takoyaki

balls.

"…You wanted takoyaki that badly?"

"No," she replied with a glare, before adding with a smirk, "let's play a game."

"What? A game?"

"Yes."

At that moment, the leading portable shrine was already right in front of them, so the

others were preoccupied with that. Masachika and Alisa gazed into each other's eyes, unfazed

by the loud noises around them.

"Doesn't it annoy you that we ran away…just like Yuki said?"

"Huh?! Uh… Yeah, but… Like… You know?"

Masachika suddenly remembered Yuki's order when she was king—to kiss—and his

heart began to race out of control. Even then, he glanced back at Yuki behind him to make

sure she wasn't listening and lowered his voice.

"But we can't do that, right?"

"I don't mind. What bothers me is her thinking I'm a coward for running away."

"Uh-huh…"

Her eyes were brimming with determination as she gazed into his…which were slowly

glazing over, but he still hadn't given up. He pointed to the others with his eyes as if to

convince her it was a bad idea.

"You want…to do it here…?"

The nervous question made Alisa smirk in satisfaction.

"That's where the game begins. If you win, I will console you once we get back to the

cottage. For example…you can lay your head down in my lap while I gently rub your head

and kiss you on the forehead."

"S-seriously?" he genuinely asked after unconsciously imagining the situation. Alisa,

the ice queen, was going to let him lie in her lap while she rubbed his head? And if that alone

wasn't enough, she was going to kiss him on the forehead, too? He wasn't even depressed

anymore, which meant he didn't need to be consoled, but that proposal was far too attractive

to turn down for a young man like Masachika.

"Of course, this doesn't come risk-free. My lap isn't cheap, after all."

Alisa provocatively raised her chin.

"…Uh-huh. What do I have to do if I lose?"

"Hmm… How about you get me out of here and take me somewhere else?"

"What?"

"I want you to lead me by the hand and take me somewhere we can be alone, then kiss

me. Yes… Passionately, okay?"

His cheek suddenly twitched.

"…You really know how to embarrass a guy, huh? What is this, the climax to a movie?"

"Giggle. The others would be shocked, to say the least. But I have to do something

embarrassing if you win, so this is only fair."

"…So what's the game?"

Alisa let out a brief, smug laugh while holding up her box of takoyaki in an amused

manner.

"The rules are simple. We're playing Russian roulette with these takoyaki. Whoever

gets the bad one, loses."

"'Russian'…? Really, Alya? Wait. What kind of food stall sells those? …And what's

inside the 'bad' one?"

"A ton of wasabi."

"Just like when they do it on TV… Couldn't whoever eats it just pretend it's not hot,

though?"

Right after he said that, he realized that playing dumb would be meaningless, since there

were only two of them, but Alisa shrugged as if she thought he had a point.

"If that happens, then the other has to guess which one was filled with wasabi, and if

they get it wrong, then it's a tie, and we play again."

"Couldn't you still lie even if the other guesses right…?"

"I expect you to be a gentleman."

"Yeah, yeah. You got it."

"Great. I'll let you pick who goes first."

"…You can go first."

After Masachika thought about it for a moment and decided to go second, Alisa

immediately pierced the closest octopus puff with her toothpick and threw it into her mouth.

"Here you go."

"…Thanks."

Her provocative smile as she handed him the take-out box let Masachika know.

She rigged this game somehow, didn't she?

It was all very suspicious, especially when Masachika had a huge advantage with how

the rules were, since he loved spicy food. And yet Alisa was unbelievably confident for some

reason. She didn'tseem to be worried she was going to get the wasabi-filled one…which only

meant one thing: She was cheating. The only reason she was acting so tough was because

she knew she was going to win no matter what.

Ah, so that's what this is about. She wants me to pay for being "inconsiderate."

She apparently did not like how he'd phrased how happy he was when she said she

would be there for him. But even after Masachika realized what the game was really about,

he simply shrugged.

It's not like I can back down now; she already ate one, so that would make her angrier…

She completely misunderstood what I said, though.

But a misunderstanding didn't change a thing because, in a way, he still ended up

embarrassing a young woman who put herself out there. It took a lot of courage to do what

she did…which meant that he needed to fall for her trap. He was going to allow her to win,

act all upset, and let Alisa laugh at him. It was a small sacrifice to make to cheer her up.

Hmm… I'm not a big fan of how wasabi's spicy, so I guess I should be careful I don't

just spit it out…

After he came to accept this harsh reality, he ate an octopus puff…and soon after had

his second one.

Huh? I'm still not getting any wasabi yet.

It was not only unexpected, but he also started to get the sense that something was off

when he was on his third takoyaki.

"Looks like this is the last one for me," Alisa announced, showing no signs of hesitation

as she tossed the last puff into her mouth and smiled provokingly. There was absolutely

nothing about her expression that made it seem like her tongue was burning.

Was it just a coincidence? She's still acting like she won. Did I just get lucky this entire

time and pick all the good ones?

"Come on, there's still one left."

"Y-yeah…"

She shoved the take-out box in his hands midthought, but he still didn't quit speculating,

even while piercing the octopus puff with the toothpick.

What's this feeling…? I think something's wrong. Alisa was clearly at a disadvantage

when she suggested this game, but she seemed unworried the entire time. She has to be

cheating or— Oh.

That was when it hit him. There was only one thing that could explain what was

happening. She wasn't cheating. Quite the opposite, actually. What was missing was…

…a wasabi-filled takoyaki. What if there was never one to begin with?

Then that would mean that all his presumptions were wrong. There was no surefire plan

for victory. It was the opposite. This game was all just…

If there were no wasabi puffs, then that would obviously mean I couldn't lose…which

means I would have to guess which one of hers was the wasabi puff…which also means that

she gets to decide if I'm right or wrong. In other words…

The game was set up for Alisa to lose no matter what. The instant he realized this, he was

overcome with an almost indescribable feeling. It was a mix of exhaustion but heartwarming

joy as well, causing him to smirk bittersweetly.

What a roundabout way to console someone. She pretended it was a game so she could

make the excuse that she didn't have a choice because she lost…just so she could make

Masachika feel better. What a compassionate partner. But…

It was my fault she felt like she had to do this in order to cheer me up…

Once it all came together in his mind, he stuck the last octopus puff in his mouth and

chewed…but of course, it wasn'tspicy at all.Just then, Alisa smugly smirked and whispered:

"<I win.>"

That Russian alone was enough to make him sure his hypothesis was right.

Well, now that I know what she's up to, I can't just let her win.

Masachika suddenly opened his eyes wide and quickly covered his mouth.

"Gwah…! Ahng…! Mmm…!"

"…?! H-huh?!"

"…! A-ahhh! Hff… Hff… Looks like I lost."

He swallowed the octopus puff and looked up, where his eyes were met with Alisa's

puzzled, blinking gaze. The blend of bewilderment and disbelief on her face made him smirk.

Immediately, he swiped the take-out box out of her hand while wrapping his other arm tightly

around Alisa's waist, reeling her in.

"Shall we go, milady?" he asked mischievously with her in his arm.

"Huh? Uh… Yes…?"

The instant she agreed with wide-open eyes, he took her hand and began to run.

"M-Masachika?!"

He could hear Yuki shout out to him from behind in astonishment, but he continued to

run without looking back, running toward the shrine gate while leaving the other five behind.

He cut through the crowd, making sure Alisa wouldn't trip. But once he passed the portable

shrines and saw the shrine gate…

Boom!

…he heard a loud pop and saw a large firework illuminating the night sky out of the

corner of his eye. Even then, he continued to run. Only after he passed through the shrine

gate, ran down the stone steps, and stepped onto the small gravel parking lot did he stop. The

parking area was on a small hill with a view of the city lights along the seaside…and also a

perfect view of the fireworks blooming in the night sky.

"…"

He remained silent as he walked her through the parking area. Only when they reached

the wooden fence did he finally let her hand go. They didn't say a word to each other for the

next ten seconds, gazing up at the fireworks in the sky, when…

"Hey," Alisa suddenly snapped with a sharp tone.

"Hmm?"

When he looked to his side, Alisa was scowling, but he was not surprised in the least,

since he knew exactly why.

"What do you think you're doing?"

"What ever could you mean?"

"…! Don't play dumb. I know you didn't lose, so why did you pretend to?"

Alisa herself knew for a fact that there was no wasabi-filled puff. In other words, she

knew that he was acting…which meant he let her win. She raised her eyebrows, clearly

wanting an explanation, but Masachika calmly tilted his head as if he were the one confused.

"Let me ask you something first."

"…What?"

"Why were you planning on pretending to lose?"

That was when it hit her. He had seen right through her scheme, her goal—everything.

Her eyes widened, a crimson hue tinting her cheeks, and he smiled smugly.

"Bwa-ha-ha! You've still got a lot to learn before you can catch me off guard!"

After boastfully cackling, he calmed down and serenely gazed into Alisa's eyes.

"Thank you for trying to make me feel better. But I'm fine now. Seriously. Just knowing

how you feel makes me so happy."

Alisa opened and closed her mouth repeatedly after she heard how serious he was…

until at last, she frowned and swiftly turned her head away from him, facing the fireworks.

He smirked and faced the fireworks as well. For the next few long moments, they silently

admired the show, watching it vividly coloring the night sky with each air-rumbling pop.

Experiencing every one with her entire body, Alisa suddenly whispered:

"…They're so beautiful."

"They are."

But right after he said that, he realized what he should have said.

Ah, dammit. You're supposed to say, "Not as beautiful as you." At least, I think that's

the line…

He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye and saw the colorful fireworks of ruby and

emerald illuminating her profile from within the darkness. It was a beauty that would take

your breath away, and yet…

Hmm… It's still pretty dark, though. She's way more beautiful during the day, when you

can clearly see her.

That unromantic, worthless thought was the first thing that popped into his head. But at

the very same time, he felt that it wouldn't be right if he didn't say the line. He faced forward

once more, waiting for the right moment to say it—waiting for the fireworks to vigorously

shoot up and explode in the sky.

You're beautiful.

"Ты красивая."

The whisper was swallowed by the explosion shaking the heavens. After glancing at

Alisa out of the corner of his eye and making sure she hadn't heard, he faced forward once

more, the mortification slowly starting to creep in.

Gwaaaaaah! I'm never doing that again! I thought I was gonna die of embarrassment!

He clenched his teeth hard to make sure he could keep a straight face while desperately

hiding his embarrassment…when he felt a hand softly being placed on his right shoulder.

What the—?

Thinking he was being tapped on the shoulder, he turned…

"Mn…"

…and Alisa's lips pressed against his cheek. The feeling of her lips and the tip of her

nose touching his cheek was undeniable. It was undoubtedly a kiss, and he froze. His brain

completely stopped, and he couldn't even hear the fireworks any longer. Only the faint sound

of a kiss reached his malfunctioning ears as Alisa's warmth quietly left his side. Only then

was he finally able to move again. When he glanced to his side, Alisa was smirking and

struggling to prevent a bashful smile.

"'You've still got a lot to learn before you can catch me off guard,' was it?" she repeated

with a bit of a smug tone as she fidgeted with her hair. Masachika was instantly reminded

of what he'd said a few moments before and of Yuki's order as well, but Alisa's kiss was so

shocking that he couldn't be bothered by any of that.

"Al— You…"

But he was lost for words while he placed a hand on his cheek.

"So? Where are you going to kiss me?" she asked with a triumphant expression, slightly

lifting her chin and making his breath catch in his throat.

If I…

If he grabbed Alisa's shoulders right now…would she let him…? He promptly shook

his head to rid himself of the ridiculous thought that came to mind and realized that he should

definitely kiss her back on the cheek. However, her unparalleled beauty emerging from within

the darkness made it impossible for him to act fast. Having his lips pressing against her fair

skin felt blasphemous, and once he began to think like that, even kissing her on the back of

her hand seemed to be an unforgivable act. Then perhaps over her clothes would be better?

The thought briefly crossed his mind until he almost immediately realized how much of a

creep he would look like for essentially kissing her belongings. There was always the option

to back out, but he felt that wouldn't be the gentlemanly thing to do, since she had already

kissed him.

"...!"

At the end of his seconds-long direful struggle was the answer. He took a step forward

in front of Alisa and extended his right hand to the side of her face.

"Mn…"

She squinted an eye, perhaps tickled by his finger brushing against her ear, but she

promptly opened it once more and gazed straight into his eyes. He gazed into hers, his hand

softly sliding down her face and scooping up her hair…as he pressed the tips of her hair

against his lips and immediately let go.

Gaaaaaaaaah!!

Immediately, he was on the ground, closing his eyes while writhing in agony…in his

imagination. His own actions were far too embarrassing for him to handle.

I mean, her hair?! Seriously?! Think about it calmly for a second! If anything, that's

something that only cool, handsome guys can pull off!!

Kissing her bare skin wasn't going to be possible, so in an act of desperation, he'd

decided to go with her hair. However, after actually thinking about it, he came to the

conclusion that what he'd done was extremely pretentious, so he started imagining himself

slamming his head violently against a wall.

"Heh… Ha-ha!"

He timidly opened his eyes to the sound of soft laughter and discovered Alisa was

holding a hand over her mouth and looking up at him with a genuinely amused gaze.

"Giggle… I thought you were going to kiss me on the lips for a second there…but my

hair? Seriously?"

"…Oh, shut up. Sorry for being such a coward."

He swiftly looked away to escape his own embarrassment and sulk a bit, which only

made Alisa laugh even more. As he watched her out of the corner of his eye, she lifted up

her hair that he'd kissed…and pressed the tips against her lips as well.

"…?!"

He stared in mute astonishment as she grinned at him.

"Wimp," she sneered provokingly before quickly grabbing his arm and wrapping hers

around it. She squeezed him tightly, slightly resting her head on his shoulder while facing

the fireworks once more.

"What am I ever going to do with a partner who understands absolutely nothing about

women?"

Her tone was jaded, but her smile was mischievous.

Oh… That's why…

…He finally realized it when he saw that look on her face. There was no way he wouldn't.

Alya, you…

Masachika had been refusing to see it for so long, but there was no way he could deny

it anymore. No longer could he pretend like he didn't notice that she had feelings for him.

And once he realized that, it felt as if his heart was being twisted in his chest.But I…

He looked up at the sky, tightly clenching his fist, but now the once genuinely beautiful

fireworks seemed fleeting and melancholic for some reason. The fireworks bloomed and

dispersed in the sky one after another, as if to create the perfect moment for him—oblivious

to how he felt while the ephemeral, beautiful lights painted their nestling shadows onto the

ground.


next chapter

Chapter 42: Epilogue: A Past That Mustn’t Be Forgotten

"Oh, Masachika. Are you going somewhere?"

"Yeah, I'll be back soon."

"Be careful."

"I will."

Masachika waved good-bye to his grandmother as he left the house. He was visiting his

grandparents' place after the student council beach vacation was over, and today, he was out

on a mission.

"Let's do this!"

After pumping himself up a bit, he began his journey under the hot sun.

"…"

While he'd realized Alisa had feelings for him during his vacation, he didn't know how

strong those feelings were. They could be very faint or shallow to the point that Alisa herself

didn't even realize she was in love. Or maybe these feelings could be clearly defined in her

mind. And if it was the latter, did Alisa want to be more than just friends? Masachika had no

idea, but now that he knew how she felt, he could no longer continue acting like he didn't…

and if he was to pretend as if he hadn't noticed or something, he would still need to find out

how he felt. He needed to decide how he would reciprocate her affection.

Am I…in love with Alya?

He'd asked himself that question countless times ever since that day at the shrine. If he

had to choose between love or hate, then of course, he loved her. That was easy. There were

times that he even felt something similar to being in love. She made his heart race from time

to time. But…

I don't know…

…if you asked him if he was in love with her, he honestly didn't know— No. He didn't

actually want to know, and he knew why.

If I remember what it feels like to love again…

…then he would be reminded of that girl he'd fallen in love with so long ago. He would

remember how much he despised himself for ever forgetting her, and he would start doubting

his own heart. That was why he'd pretended not to notice. That was why he'd always run

away from confrontation.

But…I can't keep running any longer.

He had to face reality. He couldn't use that girl as an excuse to avoid falling in love

anymore. He had to say good-bye to his past love once and for all…and move on. There was

someone who loved him. And there was someone who'd given him courage.

"You can love again."

He tucked those words, said to him with that loving embrace, into his heart as he moved

forward—as he headed toward that park filled with the memories he'd shared with that little

girl from so long ago.

"…!"

The closer he got to the park and the more the familiar the path he took, the more it tore at

his heart, the disgust and sense of rejection only growing stronger. His legs felt unbelievably

heavy, though he was ready to face his past. Maybe I should head back. I can do this some

other time. The excuses popped into his head one after another. But even then, he continued

walking. Greasy sweat unrelated to the hot sun ran down his back while his guts twisted.

Still, he pushed forward. In the end, it took him over thirty minutes to make the ten-minute

walk to the park.

"…Here it is."

But his heart strangely felt at peace the moment he saw the entrance. It was like being

scared of the unknown and then learning what it actually was. The fear was gone. The sudden

relief even made Masachika himself feel somewhat deflated.

Maybe I was actually wasting my time all these years avoiding this place…?

Or perhaps it was merely because this wasn't the most memorable place to him. This

wasn't the playground area with all the fun equipment that he'd always met that little girl at.

That place was only a small portion of this massive park. That place of his memories was at

the opposite end of the park down this path.

"I guess I just have to take this step by step," he muttered to himself, but hidden behind

his lighthearted tone was a strong determination that fueled his next move forward. Families,

a man running, and many other people passed him by while he looked around and slowly

pushed forward down the path.

Oh, that's where we used to play frisbee.

The large open space, surrounded by clusters of trees, reawakened Masachika's

childhood memories. One after another, the memories came back to him as his eyes drifted.

I used to hide over there all the time when we played hide-and-seek… Oh, that roller

slide… We used to love that thing…

There was nothing special about any of it. Nothing more than childish games. But for

someone who grew up never knowing how to be or play like a kid, those days he'd spent with

her were always brilliantly shining in his mind. Her genuine praise. Her blue eyes gazing

straight into his. Those things made him feel like he had a place in the world. They'd warmed

his frozen heart after he was thrown into despair by his mother. He felt like he could do

anything for her.

This path… Yeah… This is where we got attacked by that dog…

He began to fondly remember his past, and it was strangely comforting. The days he'd

spent with her were still as beautiful and brilliant as ever…and it didn't tear at his heart.

He wasn't distressed by a sense of loss. And that was why he was relieved. But when he

suddenly saw the fountain in the playground area, he froze.

This is… This was the last time we…

It was at this moment that he finally realized…that the seal locking away his memories

had been broken.

"<Masaaachika.>"

"<Yeah?>"

After we had finished playing just like we always did, she called me by that

mispronounced name instead of my nickname for the first time in what felt like forever. I

turned around, wondering what it could be…and noticed that the always-cheerful little girl…

was wearing a gloomy expression for a change.

"________________"

Yes… She told me something. Something shocking. But not in Russian. She told me in

Japanese. I was petrified. I was in a trance, and by the time I came back to my senses, she

was gone. I thought it had to have been some sort of mistake; I was going to ask her about

it once more tomorrow, so I went to the park the next day, but she never came. I visited the

park numerous times after that day, but no matter how long I searched, I could never find her.

Maybe I'll run into her today?

I didn't see her today, either, but surely tomorrow…

It was an endless loop of faint hope that was always met with fruitless despair. It was

around the one-month mark when I finally came to a certain realization: I'm never going to

see her again.

Shortly after that, I was taken from my new home with my grandparents and brought

back to the Suou household, where my father told me that he and my mother were getting a

divorce. I was instantly reminded of a conversation from long ago.

"Wow! He's so cool!"

When was that? I had to be in kindergarten when I saw a police officer and said that

to my father.

"Right? I actually used to want to be a police officer way back in the day," he'd replied.

"Why didn't you, then?" I'd innocently asked, as any kid would.

"Because I found something even more important than my dream." He'd grinned, but

there was a sadness somewhere in that smile. I didn't understand what he'd meant back then,

but soon after that, I learned that the Suous were a family of diplomats spanning multiple

generations, and my father had given up his dream to become one in order to get married.

I was touched. The "something" that was even more important than my father's dream was

my mother. He'd chosen the woman he loved over his dream. He's so cool. I can't believe

how cool Father is. I deeply respected my father from the bottom of my heart. And yet…

"I'm sorry, Masachika. Your mother and I are going to be living in different houses

from now on."

And yet after everything he sacrificed—after all his hard work—she betrayed him. Why

wasn't he— Why wasn't I rewarded for all my hard work?

"Okay."

I didn't have to understand. I didn't have to know why. Mother— My birth mother was

a pathetic excuse for a human being who stopped showing her husband and her child love.

That was all I needed to know.

"Then…I wish to— I'm going with you."

I didn't care anymore. Forget this. Everything was a waste of time. I did everything just

so she would look at me and praise me, and it was all for nothing. Pointless. Useless. Trash.

And if something was trash, then why not just throw it away? That mother, who stopped

acknowledging all my hard work and shunned me? In the trash. That grandfather, who still

forced me to continue working hard? Trash. This entire family, who made my father give up

on his dreams? I didn't need them anymore. All I needed were my father and my little sister,

Yuki. They were the only family I needed. As long as I had Dad and Yuki…

"I'm sorry, Masachika. I'm gonna stay here…"

But when I visited my sister'sroom,she sat up in her bed and quietly told me that without

hesitation. It was something I never even dreamed she would say. I was taken aback by her

unexpectedly strong determination.

"Are you worried about your asthma? Don't worry. It won't get worse even if we move

to a new house. If you need someone to take care of you, then we could just bring Ayano…"

Although confused, I was driven by my impatience to persuade her to come with me,

but she never nodded.

"Why?! There's nothing good here! You're better off without this family!"

I let my emotions get the best of me and shouted obscenities, mocking my mother and

grandfather.

"But Mother will be all alone if I leave…" Yuki smiled somewhat helplessly.

That was all it took. Those words. That expression. There was nothing else I could say.

I immediately understood the reality of the situation. My delicate, sickly little sister, who

I thought I always had to protect, was far more mature than I ever was. She had a will far

stronger than mine and more love in her heart than I could have ever dreamed of having.

I was suddenly embarrassed of myself. I realized how pathetic I was for insulting my own

family and losing my self-control. But the little pride I had as Masachika Suou wouldn't let

me admit it.

"Fine! Do whatever you want!"

And that was the last thing I said before leaving Yuki's room, even though I realized

deep down inside that I was only making things more embarrassing for myself.

She'll come around and apologize.

Yuki can't live without me.

I'll forgive her if she says she's sorry.

That was what my ego was telling me every day I didn't see her. When the day finally

came around to say good-bye, I looked at her standing by my mother's side, and that was

when I realized how much of a fool I was.

I was the one who decided to leave, and yet I felt like I was being abandoned. I didn't

feel any better. I felt empty when I left the Suou household. It was as if a cold breeze was

blowing through my empty heart. The entire time, Dad was apologizing to me as if this was

all his fault.

The days just idly went by for a while after that. I didn't have my grandfather's

expectations to meet, that girl who used to praise me so much was now gone, and I didn't

have extra lessons or extracurricular activities I had to do anymore. All I had was peace.

Too much of it. I didn't know what I should do or even what I wanted to do as the days

meaninglessly went by. When I was in my sixth year of elementary school and had to start

thinking which middle school I'd attend, I suddenly got the idea to try for Seiren Academy.

It was, in a way, my revenge. I was going to get into the school that my grandfather

wanted me to go to without any help from the Suou household. That would teach them.

That would show my grandfather and mother just how amazing I was. It would show them

that they lost an unparalleled successor to the family because of their stupidity. That twisted

motivation was why I belatedly began studying for the entrance exam…and ended up getting

in easily.

Heh. How'd ya like that? I got into the Seiren Academy and only had to study half a

year to do it. I'm amazing. I'm special. Those were the things my ego told me while I joined

the opening ceremony as if I were on top of the world. That is, until I saw the student who

scored the highest on their entrance exam give a speech.

"Good afternoon, everyone. My name is Yuki Suou, and I will be speaking on behalf of

all the new students."

It was my sister, who I'd left behind at the Suou household. Her posture was perfect, and

she spoke with such dignity. Seeing her healthy and all grown…finally made me realize that

I wasn't special. I was replaceable. What was really worthless— What was really trash…

was me. I always let my emotions get the best of me. I always let others decide what I should

do for me. I couldn't do anything without relying on others and searching for reasons within

them to do something. And worst of all, if I decided I was going to depend on someone for

something and they didn't react how I wanted them to, I got disappointed, even if I didn't

have any right to. And because of that, I couldn't love my own family, and I forced everything

onto my little sister, who I loved dearly.

But even then, that little sister wasso kind to her brother. She would only show her nerdy

side to him and act like her stupid, adorable self so that he wouldn't feel guilty. She would

never be embarrassed to show him love. Despite already bearing the important responsibility

of the entire Suou household as the successor, she still tried to protect their bond as a family.

She was mature with a big heart and a brilliantly glittering soul, and each time I saw that, I…

"Sigh…"

After taking a seat at the bench by the fountain, Masachika deeply exhaled and felt a

sharp pain in his chest. He felt awful. It started with remembering the last day he'd seen that

girl, and he just kept recalling one bad memory after another. He honestly felt sick.

"I want to die."

Whether he had feelings for Alisa or not wasn't the problem. It was cocky of him to

even think he was good enough for her. Him—a guy with nothing, only wandering aimlessly

waiting for someone to save him. What would he have to do to be good enough for her?

"…I'm such an idiot."

He'd never been in any position to consider if he had feelings for her, but he had been

surrounded by such amazing people with brilliant souls for so long that he'd started to feel

like he was one of them. But perhaps that was all in his head.

"…You're scum."

The self-abuse unconsciously slipped off his tongue. The old Masachika was an even

bigger scumbag than he had imagined. He'd always thought that it was completely his

mother's fault, but he was wrong. He knew that now. The one who broke that family was…

nobody other than himself.

While there were still plenty of things that he felt conflicted about, his mother had been

careful not to destroy their family. She was holding the last line of defense by not yelling

at his dad in front of them.

And yet Masachika alone broke that last line of defense. He made his resentment for his

mother no secret, and perhaps that was the last straw that led to his parents getting divorced,

because maybe she believed that she could no longer protect the bond holding the family

together any longer. The family was split in half after that, and it was Yuki who was still

desperately trying to protect that family bond that Masachika had shattered. It was his little

sister who loved her family more than anything else in the world, and she did it all with the

weight of becoming the successor to the Suou family on her shoulders.

"…!"

Masachika suddenly wanted to cry. His chest trembled while the welling tears were

burning the corners of his eyes. Was it because he felt spineless? Or perhaps it was his love

for his sister? Was it pity? He didn't know, but he clenched his teeth as he fought back the

tears. All he wanted to do now was tightly hold Yuki—her small, delicate body—in his arms

and hug her.

"Sigh…"

His sigh was mixed with countless emotions, but he stood up once more. He still hadn't

finished what he had come to do. He was here to visit all the places he'd spent with that

little girl from so long ago and say good-bye to his past love. However, he felt that this was

enough. He'd never be good enough for Alisa. In fact, he wasn't good enough for anyone.

He despised his family, and it destroyed them. He couldn't even protect his one and only

sister, who he loved more than anyone else in the entire world. He didn't deserve love that

he would get from forming a new family bond. Even if he did get that love…he wouldn't

be able to cherish it like he should.

"…Let's go home," he muttered to nobody but himself and began to walk. The summer

sunlight was so hot that it was burning his skin, and yet he couldn't feel a thing. He was

frozen inside. It was as if his organs had been removed and replaced with a cold clay. His

entire body weighed down on him like mud, and he felt disgusting.

Masachika began to walk mindlessly down the path until he eventually reached a fork

and stopped.

"…"

The path to his right was the park exit. The path to his left would take him to the most

memorable place he'd shared with that little girl: the open space filled with playground

equipment, and the spot they used to play together for hours on end. Masachika hesitated…

then faced the path to his left. Not even he knew exactly why. Perhaps he wanted to take one

last look at every area of the park so he would never have to go there again. Or maybe he had

given into the despair and turned to hurting himself, wanting to tear out his already aching

heart. Regardless, he pushed forward, lowering his heavy head and staring at the ground all

the way. Before long, the paved pathway became gravel, and when he slowly lifted his head,

there it was. The playground was much smaller than he remembered.

The sandbox was framed by green stones. Four red swings were lined up side by side.

A small fence stood behind it and in front of the road to prevent children from running into

traffic. He used to always hate weaving in between the small, staggered fence panels before

he could run over and see her. Masachika chuckled softly while recalling his past thoughts,

then looked to his left, where that dome filled with holes stood…and on top of it was…

"Huh…?"

…a familiar figure. Someone whom he had never expected to see—someone who wasn't

supposed to be there. His mind went blank. As he stood stock-still in mute amazement, the

person sitting and looking at the sky shifted her gaze toward him. And once she saw that it

was him, she stood up, placed her legs against the curved dome surface, and half slid off all

the way down. Once she hit the ground, she slowly approached him before stopping right

before his eyes. She smiled nostalgically…yet wistfully as well. Masachika was speechless.

And with countless emotions swelling in her heart, she told him:

"Long time no see—"


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