/ Fantasy / Rebirth of a Nobody
Synopsis
Marcus, your every day normal gamer was one of the only dedicated players in The World. Down on his luck following the terrible string of being unsuccessful at finding employment following his graduation, suddenly passes away in an accident and wakes up to find himself 11 years younger just before the launch of his favorite MMO of all time.
Armed with the knowledge of his past life, along with a second chance, can he right the wrongs of his past and save his family?
A classic weak to strong story without an overbearing sense of OP MC plot armor, join the adventure as he works to uncover the mysteries of The World, and what went wrong in his past life and why he was brought back.
Book Cover was found on DeviantArt and edited by the immensely talented Suoshi. If it belongs to you DM me for removal
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Write a review*Writing Quality: Excellent, not too complicated to hush you away, not too simple to make you believe it's mediocre, it draws you in and tells the story without much effort, great grammar. *Stability of Updates: As a new novel it is still not following any rigorous schedule. *Story Development: I only read the first chapters until the story began, and it was described and written well enough to allow me to relate with the MC, the parents, the friend and his situation as to why he would enter the game at all, however, perhaps because I haven't dwelled further it's difficult for me to understand what makes the game special, he received a message saying if he was bored of his life, but what does the game offer? and why would he encounter it in a private message rather than a poster in the streets, the game isn't public? etc.. etc... it lacks a point of inflexion that would attract readers in my opinion. Like that small thing that makes your novel unique, this, however, doesn't mean it's mediocre, this point of inflexion could appear in the future. *Character Design: So far I have seen MC some of the in-game characters, even interaction between NPCs and they're loyal to one another. *World Background: The entire premise envelops the game and I haven't delved further into the game to accurately judge whether it is deep enough or lacking, but I'm truly unable to understand what makes the game especial, supposing it allows you to get money in the real world, is that really it? Overall in my personal opinion, find myself with confused emotions regarding this novel, for one the structure is solid, grammar is perfect, description of events happens fluently, the in-game elements or representation of the UI in words is also properly laid on, but the premise is weak, it lacks a deterministic point which will attract readers to stick with it rather than keep scrolling. The cover also needs some improvements, overall I give it a high score because unlike most novels in this site, this is the total opposite, some of them have interesting premises but due to lack of skill they're destroyed either by bad grammar or a world that's not properly structured, etc... In this case, the world is properly structured, the grammar is perfect, but the world itself is weak and doesn't lead to anything that would attract (at least me) to read further because I can envision MC perhaps completing some quests and getting strong, beating a boss and obtaining loot, gaining money in real life, perhaps that's not how you want it to be, and instead plan something bigger for him, but that's how I perceived it with several short chapters and you need to portray that as well for them before the reader departs. Best Regards!
So I went way past the chapters that you've wanted to set as premium, and now I feel like I should give my thoughts on what I've read so far. Storywise, it's fine as a generic video game novel. However there's still stuff that lacks premise and explanation. Firstly, what makes this game so special from the other games, aside from a large playerbase during release, and how does it connect to the MC's real life? I feel like there could be a massive plothole here unless you've planned the future really well, or there might be issues in the future. If the company, per se, designed these devices that are used for the game and it turns out they have something with them that touches on forbidden stuff like time travel or whatnot, you'll have to execute it really well. Now to some minor issues. Firstly, aside from during the phantom tourney where it was apparent our MC was streaming the battles, I had issues knowing when he was streaming and when he stopped streaming. Not only that, there seems to be very lacking in terms of interactions, since all the streamers I've seen frequently interact with the chat minus situations where they're forced to do something that completely preoccupies them. Although the situations you have the MC in prevents him from casually interacting, the only real interactions I've seen was only like 1 chapter in the book, and I suggest having more interactions to make the character seem more like a real streamer (e.g thanking the viewers more for their donations). I also recommend making it more obvious as to when he started streaming and when he stopped. Onto the next issue I feel. The battles, although the descriptions are there, felt lacklaster in the sense of 1, there's not really much interactions. User A uses x skill on the monster, the monster dodges, than activates x skill of its own. This also happens during tourney, as character a casts a skill that summons tentacles, but then we just jump to character b's POV of suddenly becoming entangled. I'm not sure if you can understand my suggestion here, but for example: Character A uses [warcry]. Letting out a loud howl, the members in the parties felt themselves strengthen as they watched their attack stat sharply rise. Something like this paints for more imagery, and although there are areas where you did do this, some areas felt lacking or executed not well enough. This is something you can polish. Final thing I feel that your story really needs is risk. For one, this character is playing this game for some odd reason instead of working on a way to save his family's business, yet we don't know how the game is related to his past at all. If you die in the game, you die irl is one of the most popular risks. In the case of the King's Avatar, we have the MC working towards building a new team and going back to pro league, hence there is a clear goal. With your story, aside from making a guild and whatnot, it seems like his goals are unclear of what he wants to do different in this life. If I had a chance to go back in time, I wouldn't spend it playing a video game that would eventually die unless there's a very good reason to. Be careful of these plotholes.
Reveal SpoilerAfter reading some chapter's I gotta say I really enjoy your Story and it's curing me of my boredom on Webnovel. There aren't that many Stories that revolve about a Nobody that becomes someone Great. This Story has lots of potential I hope you don't mess it up. With that said I will continue reading and give more Reviews in the Future.
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Reveal SpoilerI really like the story and the pace of the world building, it also has nice and not too many interactions with characters, also I noticed that the mc isn't dumb like other authors would do with their mc.
Not a review just a question (only gave 5 stars because I didn't want to mess up authors ratings for my question) You said Mc isn't gonna have OP plot armor, but how is that possible if he has a system in the modern world?
Hard to put down after picking up. I just wanted to keep reading it. the characters are well written and the interactions are well written and this is just well written in general. Definitely recommend.
So... it may seem like a typical isekai story on the surface, but then, I can sense that there are some unique spins on this genre. Being reborn in a game that's about to end its service seems like a nice touch. I can't wait to see how this will all unfold.
It's a really good story that follows the idea of jumping back in time. Even though it's a common novel idea, the author still manages to draw you into the world. The itemization and quests along with the fame system are well balanced and believable. The writing of the environment also paints a grand picture of the game in your mind. The only thing I would note is that it has a slow start to the story, taking around seven chapters before you even get into the time jump. So if you can stick around for that then you're in for a good ride!
The book was quite appealing. Combining rebirth and Video game in a unique and pleasant way made it quite enjoyable. But I kinda wonder, a guy with eidetic memory and was average Joe..🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️ That's the first... Maybe that what makes this book intriguing... Loves to read more.
Wonderful author and story in the making here. The story is wonderful and has amazing concepts. The character design is well flushed out and has realistic personality. THE MOST AMAZING PART IS THE UPDATES it is very hard nowadays to find a good author that has stable updates. OVERALL WONDERFUL AUTHOR AND MY BEST WISHES TO THEM!
I haven't read many novels of this genre but reading this novel is boosting interest in me to read more of its kind. I liked the concept and enjoyed every minute of my reading time. that's all any story needs to be good, if you enjoy it, it's gold.
The book is extremely thrilling and it took my time, I love the author's description and with Marcus not being ambitious made the book more interesting! A great piece io work. I was into romance but this was more than I've expected. Can't wait to read more!
Love this book beyond,I would definitely use some grammar from this book ,I love the ML ,the character design is great ,the story development is great too honestly I think everything about this book is great . that's way I gave it an overall 5.0 mark .great work Author and all the best with this masterpiece I highly recommend this book.
Wow, this is a great masterpiece! I've become addicted to the book already (lol) I haven't seen an English so clear and understandable. The author takes his time to bring forth this wonderful book and I must say I'm impressed. Thank you so much author for bringing this book my way and I'll be here supporting the book to the best of my ability.
It was a good light-hearted read. After reading various rebirth novels, I feel that this was the much needed one. This is just some nobody we can all relate to and always fantasize about. All in all, I recommend reading it and I also look forward to what more you'll bring to us author :)
Thank you very much for an invite for a free reading of your creation. The story is interesting, has a great detailed description, and is a prolific writer that knows his plot well, interesting as you go on with the chapters.
The author has taken quite the tried and true genre and has done a wonderful job making it their own. The story is progressing but it doesn’t feel like it is going too fast. There is a good mix between combat, world building, story, and character development. The novel is an easy read and is a nice surprise from a new author
Author One_Winged_Angel
Shameless Author Review here: I have enjoyed a lot of similar genre stories on this platform and with my background I felt the urge to put my own work out there. I am dedicated to putting out flawless chapters and if you locate any grammatical or spelling errors, please point them out and they will be immediately fixed. I am consistently working on creating a nice balance between chapter updates and will committedly release chapters on the daily. I wish I had put more work into the first chapters and published more than 1,000 words each chapter, I may go back and up their word count without adjusting the actual flow of the chapter. I maintained a minimum of 1k words per chapter up until chapter 30 at which point I raised it to 1500 and will not go below that. The story will continually be developed and follows Marcus and his adventures through a game that has much more going on behind the scenes than he had initially thought. The risks will constantly be increased as the story progresses and the novel becomes more fleshed out. I absolutely love creating characters and having them fill roles within the story. The cast shall be expansive and constantly growing and decreasing. I aim to have no two characters alike and want to have a nice variety in the main and supporting cast. I love adjectives and really enjoy growing the world around our cast and hope that shows through my work. I love world building and generating the setting that our characters are in. I really hope you guys enjoy the story and take the time to like, vote, and comment, I read every comment and am more than happy to reply to your questions. Feel free to join the discord to see more behind the scenes information and connect with fans.