[Don't take it seriously!]
In the vast and vibrant world of Naruto, where the prowess of a shinobi is both revered and feared, there exists an Uchiha unlike any other.
Uchiha Yoichi, a name that would forever echo through the annals of Konoha's history, not for his Sharingan's might, nor for his bravery in battle, but for a power so bizarre, it left even the most stoic of ninja in stitches.
It all began on what seemed to be an ordinary day, with Yoichi training in the forest, honing his skills and mastering new jutsu. Little did he know, a peculiar squirrel, with fur as white as snow and eyes gleaming with mischief, was about to change his life forever.
As Yoichi locked eyes with the creature, he felt a surge of chakra unlike any other, and in the blink of an eye, he vanished, only to reappear atop the Hokage Monument, startling a flock of birds—and the Third Hokage, who was enjoying his morning tea.
Word of Yoichi's inexplicable power spread like wildfire, and soon, the whole village was abuzz. The Uchiha prodigy had gained the ability to teleport randomly every time he laid eyes on an animal.
While some saw it as a formidable ability, Yoichi found it to be more of a curse than a blessing.
Trying to control his newfound power, Yoichi embarked on a journey of self-discovery, which, unbeknownst to him, would be filled with the most uproarious misadventures.
From popping up in the middle of a heated debate in the Jonin Council, courtesy of a stray cat, to interrupting a secret Anbu meeting because of a mischievous frog, Yoichi's life had turned into a comedy of errors.
Determined to find a solution, Yoichi sought the counsel of Tsunade, the legendary Sannin known for her medical ninjutsu.
However, upon arriving at her office, he was greeted by Tonton, her beloved pet pig. In a flash, Yoichi vanished, only to reappear in the middle of the village's hot spring, much to the shock of the bathing elderly shinobi.
Realizing the gravity of the situation, Tsunade, between bouts of laughter, agreed to help Yoichi. Together, with the aid of Jiraiya, who couldn't resist documenting Yoichi's misfortunes for his next novel, they embarked on a quest to control or at least mitigate his erratic teleportation.
After many trials and errors, including an unexpected trip to the Land of Waves because of a seagull, Tsunade concocted a seal that would help Yoichi manage his power.
Though it wasn't a perfect solution, as Yoichi now had to wear sunglasses whenever he was around animals, it significantly reduced the randomness of his teleportation.
Uchiha Yoichi's tale soon became a legend in Konoha, a story told with fondness and laughter.
His adventures served as a reminder that even in a world filled with peril and strife, there's always room for a good laugh, especially when it involves an Uchiha and his uncontrollable power to teleport at the sight of animals.
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"Lord Yoichi, this is Lord Orochimaru. He wished to visit you, so he sought me out," Mina announced upon her return, trailing another figure dressed in a kimono with a thick hemp rope tied around the waist, accompanied by golden eyes and pallid skin.
Today, Yoichi was set to meet all three Legendary Sannin.
"Lord Orochimaru, please come in," Yoichi welcomed his guest, instructing Mina to prepare tea, then both settled in the living room.
After serving the tea, Yoichi inquired, "Lord Orochimaru, what brings you to me?"
"I heard from Jiraiya that someone has signed a summoning contract with the most temperamental serpent in Ryūchi Cave. My summoning beast also originates from there, so I was curious to visit."
Orochimaru's voice was raspy, carrying a sinister undertone, perhaps a reason for his lesser popularity in the village compared to Tsunade and Jiraiya, though his reputation among female ninja was somewhat better.
"While inquiring about Shin from Manda, it hinted at something intriguing. I'm not merely a contractor with Ryūchi Cave but its master.
There must be a distinction between the two. Yoichi-kun, being another individual who has signed a contract with the serpents of Ryūchi Cave, do you understand the difference?"
After pondering Orochimaru's question, Yoichi decided to give him a lead, "Perhaps it involves Senjutsu."
Currently, Orochimaru lacked encounters with Jūgo, leading to ignorance about Senjutsu's existence.
"Senjutsu? What is that?"
Orochimaru's interest peaked upon hearing about Senjutsu, aspiring to master all ninjutsu and uncover the world's truths.
"Physical and spiritual energies combine to form chakra, but adding a third type, natural energy, refines it into Senjutsu chakra. However, natural energy is challenging to control; it demands a vast amount of chakra to train, or else it leads to death."
Considering being devoured by the Snake Sage as another form of demise, Yoichi didn't exaggerate.
As for the trials, Yoichi believed Orochimaru's capabilities were sufficient to surpass them; even before mastering Edo Tensei, Orochimaru was adept in genjutsu.
"Mastering Senjutsu chakra enters one into Sage Mode, enhancing ninjutsu significantly. Furthermore, the three Great Sage Regions possess unique Senjutsu."
Orochimaru's excitement grew, "It sounds like a formidable ace. Does Senjutsu chakra enhance all forms of ninjutsu? And what's Ryūchi Cave's special Senjutsu?"
"I haven't learned Senjutsu. My visit to Ryūchi Cave was to find Shin, so I'm unaware."
Yoichi shrugged. His knowledge of Senjutsu was theoretical, and real-life practices might vary significantly. However, he acknowledged Ryūchi Cave's Senjutsu as exceptionally potent.
"My apologies, Yoichi-kun. Hearing about unfamiliar ninjutsu excited me."
Orochimaru calmed his enthusiasm, then inquired about accessing Ryūchi Cave.
"Lord Orochimaru, have your summoning beast perform reverse summoning."
"It demands five hundred human sacrifices."
Hearing this, Mina shuddered at the thought of a man-eating summoning beast requiring such a toll.
"Lord Orochimaru, you're quite generous to your summoning beast. Subduing Shin required a fierce battle."
Yoichi shared the location of Ryūchi Cave: "It's in a village at the northernmost point of the Land of Iron. Their ancestors achieved perfect Sage Mode through training in Ryūchi Cave, granting their descendants the ability to absorb natural energy.
Find the village chief, and he'll guide you to the underground caverns. From there, it's up to you to find the barrier to Ryūchi Cave."
"Thank you, Yoichi-kun!"
Grateful, Orochimaru acknowledged Yoichi's assistance, sparing him the search for five hundred sacrifices for Manda.
Post-discussion, Orochimaru prepared to leave, "Yoichi-kun, thank you for today. You've earned a favor. Should you need help, seek me out."
"It was a small favor, Lord Orochimaru."
After escorting Orochimaru out, Yoichi turned to Mina, "How's your learning? Has Tsunade been teaching you diligently?"
"Yes, Tsunade-sama has been thorough, though I haven't performed surgery yet."
Mina shared her progress in medical ninjutsu and recent studies in detoxification.
Suddenly, Mina hesitated, then confided, "Lord Yoichi, I feel Tsunade-sama is inquiring about you. She once asked if you showed interest in my clothing."
Lowering her voice, Mina's embarrassment prevented her from mentioning lingerie.
"Why would she suddenly ask that?"
Yoichi feigned righteousness but inwardly felt uneasy, relieved he had disposed of the pink cotton item.
"She suspects my character?"
"I assured her there was nothing of the sort!"
Mina reassured Yoichi, who she tempted several times without eliciting the behavior Tsunade suggested.
"Enough about her. Let's prepare for dinner, Mina."
After dinner, Yoichi retired to his room early, planning to make a night visit to the Hokage Building to copy the Sealing Book. If discovered, he planned to use the Demon Passport on Hiruzen.
The Hokage Building, protected by both the Anbu and the most powerful safeguard, the Hokage himself, posed a challenge. Yet, with the Sharingan, Yoichi found evading the building's guards relatively easy.
After hypnotizing a guard with genjutsu, Yoichi learned which rooms held the village's most guarded secrets.
Methodically searching, he aimed to find the Sealing Book.
His genjutsu skills, while not the strongest in the Uchiha clan, were among the top tier.
The guard's memory was altered to forget the hypnosis, ensuring no traces were left behind.
Searching the confidential rooms, Yoichi found the Sealing Book in the last room, only to be confronted by an angry voice.
"Uchiha Yoichi, what are you doing in the Ninjutsu Room at this hour?"
Turning around, Yoichi saw Hiruzen staring coldly at him, ready for combat.
"I wished to see the Sealing Book, if that's alright, Lord Third."
While speaking, Yoichi presented the Demon Passport to Hiruzen.
"What nonsense are you... I see, well, make sure to close the door behind you. The Sealing Book is in the innermost part."
Upon seeing the Demon Passport, Hiruzen's eyes softened, his anger dissipated, replaced by a benign smile.
After directing Yoichi to the book's location, Hiruzen chuckled and left, muttering about the need for early sleep.
"Wait, Lord Hiruzen, come here first!"
Yoichi called Hiruzen back, delivered a series of slaps, then waved the Demon Passport and sent him off to sleep.
With Hiruzen's face swollen but still smiling warmly, he agreed it was time for bed.
After Hiruzen left, Yoichi admired the two remaining uses of the Demon Passport, planning to leverage it wisely next time.
Then, he proceeded to the scroll room, finding two identical Sealing Books. One contained common ninjutsu, while the other held true forbidden techniques like the Flying Thunder God Technique and Edo Tensei.
With limited time and the presence of other patrols, Yoichi quickly copied the valuable forbidden techniques without being greedy to copy all ninjutsu, knowing there wouldn't be enough time till dawn.
With the forbidden jutsu in hand, Yoichi meticulously covered his tracks before quietly leaving the Hokage Building.
However, as he neared the Uchiha district, he was unexpectedly stopped.
"Halt! Who goes there?"
After a brief exchange of glances between their red Sharingan eyes, the other party, recognizing Yoichi, apologized for the misunderstanding, mistaking him for an outsider due to the late hour.
With a crackle of electricity in his hand for illumination, Yoichi dispersed the lightning chakra upon recognizing the individual as Uchiha Tomizu, a fellow clan prodigy, now a member of the village's guard.
"Tomizu, I didn't expect you to have graduated and joined the guard. Are you enjoying it?"
Despite Tomizu's ambition for more than just village patrols, he inquired about Yoichi's late-night presence outside the clan area.
Yoichi, keeping the details to himself, suggested Tomizu consult the Second Elder for any queries, then left.
Back home, Yoichi planned to carry the copied forbidden techniques with him, ready to train suitable disciples in the future.
Among the jutsu, he was particularly interested in mastering the Flying Thunder God Technique and Edo Tensei; the former for its near-immortal potential, the latter as an 'unlimited power bank.'
"Let's give training a try. My Yin Release affinity should aid in mastering sensory techniques."
After jotting down the training methods, Yoichi securely stored the scrolls, knowing he'd need a secluded place for the more advanced steps.
Meanwhile, Jiraiya, having earned a handsome reward from a mission, sought to reunite with Orochimaru and Tsunade for a rare gathering, eagerly accepted by both, provided Tsunade wasn't footing the bill.
Despite it being daytime, the trio found solace in the quiet of the bar, their conversation veering from the mission's ease to Senjutsu inquiries.
(End of Chapter)
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