Chapter 290: Atmosphere

'Dear father...

I have wasted so much time, I have hated so much and there are so many things I regret in my life that I can't be counted on one hand.

Yet, there is nothing I regret as much as I regret having hated you and not having come to talk to you when I was young.

Maybe you would have rejected me or you would have treated me badly, although I highly doubt it at least I wouldn't die with that doubt now.

Every day of my youth, before falling asleep I hoped I would dream of you because in my dreams I would get the happiness and the life I was hoping for. A life with you. But when then I woke up sweating cold for the nightmares as I only dreamed about my deplorable life of mine.

When rarely I dreamed of you and me together waking up from that imagination was even worst than waking up from the nightmare because that was when I realized I could never have it.