Chapter 11: "A Not-Date. Whatever That Means."
This story is Fanfiction, and I don't own ๐๐ผ๐ป๐ผ๐๐๐ฏ๐ฎ!, if I did, Aqua would be even more useless. ๐๐ผ๐ป๐ผ๐๐๐ฏ๐ฎ! Is owned by ๐ฆ๐๐๐ฑ๐ถ๐ผ ๐๐ฒ๐ฒ๐ป and ๐ก๐ฎ๐๐๐๐บ๐ฒ ๐๐ธ๐ฎ๐๐๐๐ธ๐ถ.
-<[๐ผ๐, ๐พ๐ง๐๐ฅ!]>-
"๐๐๐พ๐๐๐๐พ๐๐๐๐พ๐๐๐๐พ๐-๐ฐ๐ฉ๐ด๐ฉ๐ช๐ต-!" I stumbled, "Damn It Darkness!" I yelled at her irritatedly.
She moaned.
"GORAAAOW!" The roar echoed from behind me and my two retreating party members, "Why did you have to poke the damn Drake?!" Megumin yelled at Darkness as well.
She moaned again.
I shook my head and focused on getting us out of here.
"GORAAAOOOOOW-!" The undead Drake roared once more.
"""AAAAAAAAH!/H~!"""
โฆ
This was not how I expected today to go.
What I had planned was to go bully some Toads, maybe have a picnic, with Darkness as the table because she probably would annoy me otherwise, and drop Megumin off at her Inn.
But ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฐ~, there just ๐ฉ๐ข๐ฅ to be an undiscovered entrance to a dungeon near the plains.
๐๐ฆ๐ค๐ข๐ถ๐ด๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ต ๐ฎ๐ข๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ด ๐ต๐ฐ๐ต๐ข๐ญ ๐ด๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ด๐ฆ!
"Megumin! Do the thing!" I yelled, before grabbing her and placing her on my shoulders.
She blushed from the contact I had on herโฆ admittedly very soft thighs.
"A-Alright!" she agreed, before focusing on her staff, and started to chant, "๐๐๐ ๐จ๐ฉ๐ง๐ค๐ฃ๐๐๐จ๐ฉ ๐ค๐ ๐๐ก๐ก ๐ข๐๐๐๐, ๐๐๐๐ ๐ข๐ฎ ๐๐๐ก๐ก๐๐ฃ๐! ๐๐ค ๐ฅ๐๐๐ง๐๐ ๐๐๐ก๐ก๐จ, ๐๐๐จ๐ฉ๐ก๐๐จ, ๐ข๐ค๐ช๐ฃ๐ฉ๐๐๐ฃ๐จ, ๐ฉ๐๐ ๐จ๐ ๐ฎ! ๐ฝ๐ง๐๐๐๐ฉ ๐๐ง๐๐ข๐จ๐ค๐ฃ, ๐ก๐๐๐๐ฉ๐๐ฃ๐ ๐ฉ๐๐ ๐จ๐ ๐ฎ! ๐๐๐๐ ๐ข๐ฎ ๐๐๐ก๐ก, ๐๐ฃ๐ ๐๐ง๐๐๐๐๐๐ฉ๐ ๐ข๐ฎ ๐๐ฃ๐๐ข๐ฎ, ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐-"
-<{๐๐๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐๐๐ฝ๐ผ๐พ๐}>-
*๐๐ป๐ผ๐ฐ๐ธ ๐๐ป๐ผ๐ฐ๐ธ ๐๐ป๐ผ๐ฐ๐ธ*
I knocked on the door of the room Megumin was staying in, "You awake?" I asked through the door.
I heard a muffled "Give me a second!" before the door opened some seconds later.
"H-Hi Jenny!" She greeted me, her face a tinge of red.
I chuckled, her face going a shade deeper, "Seems you dressed up rather nicely, I thought we were going to slaughter some Toads, not go on a date~" I teased, and she looked to the side pouting, "Wouldn't want you getting your clothes all dirty sweetcheeks~"
"I-its a Not-Date!" She huffed.
"Yes. A Not-Date. Whatever That Means~" I teased again.
I don't think she'd be able to handle any more teasing from what I could see, "L-lets just go alright!"
She pushed past me, and started walking down the stairs to the main hall. I turned to follow suit, before running into aโฆ friendly face.
"Oh- Uhโฆ hey Darknessโฆ What's up?" She looked surprised to see me, before saying "Oh, Hey Mis- Uh, I mean Jenny! How are you?"
I was startled by the strange look on her face, before answering, "Yeah, taking Megumin on a little Toad hunting, but I would rather think of it as a date."
Her face darkened for a split second, before she asked, "Can I come?! I could be bait! All slimy, wiggling around in that tigh-"
I held up my hand, obviously uncomfortable, "O-ho-ho-kayโฆ Too much information." She never broke eye contact with me.
I sighed, knowing that she would keep asking until I said yes, "Ugh, Fine. I guess you can come. But whatever Megumin does to you is on you." A little bit of drool fell from her mouth.
"I know, I want that to happen."
I sweatdropped, but then heard Megumin from the Inn's lobby, "Hey Jenny! You coming?"
"Just a sec! Got a friend to-" "A Friend?!" Megumin yelled, sounding rather upset.
I descended the stairs with Darkness trailing behind me. I stopped by Megumin's side, before asking her, "Are you ready to go?"
She stared at Darkness, with strange, empty eyes. Darkness started panting.
She stared for a few more seconds, before turning to me, her eyes vibrant once more. "Sure!" she said with a small smile.
โฆ
It was a swell stroll to the field, though Megumin did occasionally turn to star at Darkness every now and again... I had an Idea.
"Hey girls, could we stop by here for a bit?" They turned to me confused.
I strolled to a nice spot, a small flat of grass, before putting my bag on the ground, pulling a small blanket, along with some baskets of food.
"A picnic?" Megumin asked, her voice sounding rather cheery. Darkness started muttering about being a table for some reason.
I turned to them, sat on the blanket, a smile gracing my features, "Heh, yeah. Come n' sit down, sweetcheeks!"
Her face went atomic, before holding her face in her hands, muttering, "But-But-But its too soonโฆ hehehe~"
Darkness walked past her, snapping Megumin from her little daydream. Her smile died, glaring at Darkness, "๐ฎ๐ช๐ฏ๐ฆ๐ฎ๐ช๐ฏ๐ฆ๐ฎ๐ช๐ฏ๐ฆ๐ฎ๐ช๐ฏ๐ฆ๐ฎ๐ช๐ฏ๐ฆ๐ฎ๐ช๐ฏ๐ฆ-" she started muttering.
"Uhโฆ Megumin? Sandwich?" I offered.
She immediately regained her smile, "Sure!"
โฆ
Some minutes into the picnic, Megumin complimenting my food, and Darkness offering to 'Be my chair' I noticed something.
I've always been considered 'lucky', If lucky meant stumbling into a creature's nest, filled with gold.
And it seemed that my luck decided to strike again.
"Hey, do you two see that?" I asked the girls, and they looked over to the hill I was pointing at.
There was an opening in the hill that wasn't there the last time we were there hunting toads. It looked like the entrance to a dungeon.
"Hey, Meguminโฆ wanna go dungeoneering?" I asked her, My chitin brow raised.
And then darkness answered for her. "Yes! We'll use me as bait!" with a flush, before grabbing both of us in her arms and booking it to the entrance.
โฆ
"Did I ever tell you why I hate sand?" I asked the two before they shook their heads 'no'
"I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Like my shoes, my hair, even my unmentionables. The latter is a pain in the ass to clean." I started ranting because I swear for as long as I live, I refuse to step on a desert planet.
The damn Dune Worms gave me PTSD! They are evil! Evil I tell you!
"And no, Darkness, I will not be using you like a horse. There is a time and place, and here is neither." I told Darkness without the need to look back.
I've been around her for long enough to know when she's gotten any perverted fantasies.
I'm still mad that I was labeled 'Mistress' by the masochist. I mean, I get it, I glared at you.
But that was ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ค๐ฆ, ๐ต๐ธ๐ฐ ๐ธ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฌ๐ด ๐ข๐จ๐ฐ.
Excuse me If I find that unfair. I didn't even consent-
A chill went up my spine, before Megumin interrupted the deafening silence, "You thought something rude just now, didn't you Darkness?" She said, with no little amount of edge to her voice.
Darkness's breath hitched, before nodding, "Y-yesโฆ Will I beโฆ 'punished', for it?" She asked with hope in her voice.
Megumin stared at her with dead eyes, before finally, "You are now the shield. Go on up ahead. Please trigger a trap and die."
Honestly, I would be more worried if I didn't see darkness take an Explosion point-blank and come out with a bruise.
Honestly, her defense is a little ridiculous.
Megumin turned to me, her face slightly light from the light the fungi were emitting, a serene blue glow accentuating her features.
"Seems we're finally alone, right ๐ ๐๐ฃ๐ฃ๐ฎ~" She said, her eyes slightly hazy with a tinge of blush on her child-like face.
A deranged yet somehow still sweet smile was the most prominent feature on her face, paired with her (They could glow?!) now glowing red eyes.
In the show, or, the Light novel, Megumin's age was set around 16-14. But apparently, the authors (They are affected by something called 'Bleed through') weren't exactly on the mark with that.
Some things were missed, others were just flat wrong, and some things like traditions were off the dot.
Butโฆ I was curious. So I had to ask, and two weeks ago, I had the perfect opportunity.
The morning after her sleep in the guest rooms on my ship, I was cooking some omelets and toast for breakfast before I asked her, "How old are you anyway? I know looks can be deceiving because I've met my fair share of old people who look like children"
And that one Nekomimi, but I consider her a shoot-to-kill target.
She stared at me blankly before sighing, "I'm twenty, almost twenty-one."
My eyebrows shot up in surprise.
"๐๐ฐ ๐ด๐ฉ๐ฆ'๐ด ๐ญ๐ฆ๐จ๐ข๐ญโฆ" I muttered. I wasn't sure how, but she caught what I was saying.
"Is it different where you came from?" She asked.
"Yeah, back home- Hup!" I flipped the omelet, "The age of consent was Eighteen."
She muttered about that being strange, and something about 'those damn stuck-up nobles', before I finished our breakfast.
I'll admit, the ensuing Food-gasm was definitely worth the slap.
Megumin leaned forward, trying to cup my cheek, but failing due to the height difference. I chuckled, which caused her to pout adorably.
"Heh, I-" I was interrupted by the sound of clashing metal, wellโฆ
The clashing of metal against something, accompanied by some very familiar moaning.
We both sighed, and said simultaneously, "๐๐ข๐ฎ๐ฏ ๐ช๐ต ๐๐ข๐ณ๐ฌ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐ด๐ดโฆ" Before I started running towards it, my Handcannon was ready just in case.
"C'mon Sweet-cheeks! No time to waste!" I yelled to Megumin before she grabbed her discarded staff and sprinted after me.
โฆ
"Christ! How deep is Darkness anyway?!" I yelled, after all, we've been running towards the sounds of a (definitely one-sided) battle.
"I think we're almost there! *huff* Damn short legs!" Megumin responded, but turned to me again, holding her arms out.
"Fine," I grumbled before scooping her up into a bridal carry.
Some corners later and we found a panting darkness running from-
Is that a skeleton?
โฆwait-
That's a-!
THAT'S A FUCKING DRA-"DRAKE!"
""๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐-""
And that brings us to now.
-<{๐๐๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐ผ๐๐๐ฝ๐ผ๐พ๐}>-
"๐๐๐๐๐๐๐!" As Megumin finished her chanting, I grabbed Darkness and jumped, positioning her behind me, And a look of understanding flashed across her face.
Before-
*๐ฝ๐๐๐!*
"Yes~!" She shouted
โฆ
๐๐๐๐, ๐ผ ๐กโ๐๐๐ ๐ผ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ก ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ ?
-<[๐ผ๐, ๐พ๐ง๐๐ฅ!]>-
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