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Fantasy 28 Chapters 99.3K Views
Author: Delliiriium

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4Reviews

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  • Stability of Updates
  • Story Development
  • Character Design
  • World Background

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Dr_Zombie

Pretty good story so far, very well written with decent descriptions, etc. Probably one of the better ones, in terms of grammar and spelling, on this site. Keep writing, hope you win the contest.

6yr
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SimmeringHours

I'd give this a five out of five up to chapter five (Only five chapters has been posted so far.) The grammar and writing is smooth and great. The characters have distinct characteristics. The story is intriguing and makes me anticipate what's going to happen next... Don't want to spoil anything here. Keep up the good work!!!

6yr
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FriedSpringRolls

I am a dog I love spring rolls! I give you 5 stars! Keep it up! Write more and publish chapters everyday! Fried spring rolls is the best food! Fried spring rolls is best when dipped on sweet and spicy sauce!

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6yr
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AerynSun

I like it! Quite an interesting angle to have two MCs from the onstart and I think it has good potential. The language is smooth and strong, and very descriptive to help the reader understand the setting of each scene. The origin story of greed and gluttony makes you want to know how it will pan out in the two characters' lives. Will you be providing a bit more background to the world? Eg in the auxiliary chapters? Keep going, it's great so far!

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6yr
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Author Delliiriium