Chapter 1: ❈—01:: Sasuke Uchiha 2.0 [I]
Three hours.
That's how long we've sat in our empty classroom waiting for Kakashi Hatake to show up, and if I'd thought that his behaviour was childish, annoying, and remarkably unprofessional while watching it on a screen, actually living through it, and knowing that this man is who I'll need to depend on to help me attain the strength I so desperately need, is ten times worse.
"What are you doing, Naruto?"
The question comes from Sakura Haruno, one of the two other people in the room with me and my newly assigned teammate, and until last night, a girl who my feelings for were overwhelmingly similar to the irritation one feels when they suddenly need to take a shit at an inconvenient time.
The final person in the classroom, and the target of Sakura's query, is Naruto Uzumaki, village idiot and troublemaker. And, according to these other memories I now possess, the Nine-Tails jinchūriki.
I... honestly don't know how to feel about that last one. Mostly because I would like to believe that The Fourth Hokage wouldn't be stupid enough to seal a Tailed Beast in a person, much less a baby.
But then again, according to my new memories, The Third Hokage is a leader who thinks that it's somehow a good idea to protect the man who signed off on the extermination of one of the village's founding clans, without thinking about, or more likely completely ignoring what would happen when (not if, when) the other clans find out about it.
Of course, thinking about the fate of my clan inevitably leads me to thinking about the man who has never been far from my thoughts for the last two years.
Itachi. The Rogue Uchiha.
The man who I realize now that, if these memories are somehow true, murdered 67 of his relatives and traumatized his brother for life, simply because Danzo Shimura had asked him to.
And you know what? I hated him less when I thought that he'd simply lost his mind or turned traitor.
I only notice Sakura and Naruto's frightened stares when Sakura manages to stutter out, "S-sasuke, a-are you okay?"
I blink at her question, then I realise; I'm oozing Killing Intent, wild and unfocused. And while I'm pretty sure that any ninja worth their salt would find it cute at best, to fresh genin like Naruto and (especially) Sakura, it must be chilling.
The realization of what I'm doing causes me to stop, but before I can even begin to stammer out an apology, Naruto blows up hotter than an explosive tag.
"Hey, asshole," the blonde screams. "What the fuck was that? You trying to intimidate me, or something?"
Momentarily, I'm taken aback by his reaction, then almost unconsciously one of my eyebrows climb; seriously? He took that as me trying to intimidate him?
Why would I even want to intimidate him?
Unfortunately, Naruto saying anything at all in my general direction is more than enough to send Sakura into full-on harpy mode, and right now's no different.
"Don't you dare call Sasuke names, Naruto," the girl says with venom in her tone. "You're the idiot who was trying to prank our new sensei.
"Like something so stupid and obvious would ever even work."
Naruto was going to prank Kakashi?
I stare at Naruto's hand and notice the eraser in it.
The eraser prank; just like in my new memories.
Naruto looks hurt by Sakura's words. "But Sakura," the boy begins, "I—
"Shut up," the girl cuts him off. "I don't want to hear your—
The door swings open with a creak, and Leaf Jonin Kakashi Hatake slouches into the room.
Distracted by my unintended burst of killing intent, Naruto hadn't finished setting up his prank, but even so, Kakashi takes one look at the three of us and says; "My first impression of you? You're all idiots."
Naruto rages, Sakura blushes, I scowl.
Not because Kakashi's words annoy me (though they most certainly do), but because they're what my memories had told me the Jonin would say.
Yet again, despite all it's inconsistencies with my actual life, another event from that "Naruto" anime has come to pass.
First was Teams 7, 8, and 10 having the exact members that it says they would; then Kakashi being late; and now, Naruto's eraser prank and Kakashi's words.
So many inconsistencies, and yet notable events keep slotting into place.
Where will it end? I wonder, a little chill running down my spine.
Kakashi's voice pulls me from my thoughts. "Meet me on the roof," he says, then disappears in a burst of smoke.
The three of us blink in confusion at the suddenness of Kakashi's exit before Naruto screams; "Hey, where'd he go?"
Sakura rolls her eyes. "He said to meet him on the roof, you idiot. That's obviously where he went."
"Oh, right," Naruto says with an awkward head scratch and self-deprecating chuckle.
"Come on," I say, and without waiting to see if they're following, jump out the window and begin to walk up the walls of The Academy to the roof.
This is one of the many inconsistencies between real life and the supposed Naruto universe; in the story, the Omnidirectional/Terrain Traversal Technique, colloquially known as the Wall-Walking technique is something that's taught to new genin, in real life though, it's taught in The Academy.
The fifth year of The Academy, to be specific. Ensuring that by the time we graduated almost two years later, even a talentless idiot like Naruto had more or less mastered it.
With an abrupt dash and a cry of "Last one there's a buttface," said talentless idiot tries to turn our walk up to the roof into a race, but neither Sakura nor myself engage.
When we finally make it up, almost half a minute after him, Naruto looks upset, but we ignore him and head for where we see Kakashi leaning against the railing on the other side of the roof.
"Well, hello again, my cute, little genin. Glad you could make it," Kakashi says brightly when we near, his sole open eye completely guileless and a happy smile clear on his face despite most of it being covered.
I don't need any memories from a strange other life to let me know that it's bullshit.
"Hey," Naruto says loudly, "why'd you ask us to come here?"
I swear, that boy only has two volumes, and the other one is louder.
Kakashi doesn't seem bothered by the boy's volume or tone though, in fact he sounds practically chipper as he answers.
"Oh, that? Yeah, sorry, I'm allergic to classrooms, and I thought that it might ruin our introduction if your new sensei went into anaphylactic shock.
"Speaking of; my name is Kakashi Hatake. I like some stuff, dislike other stuff, and if you want me to tell you my dream, you're going to have to buy me dinner first. Now, you try."
At that Kakashi pointed at Sakura, his entire being still radiating that happy smile.
None of us, not even Mr. Loudmouth to my left, can come up with an appropriate response for what just happened.
Though I'm sure my reasons may differ from my new teammates'.
"Um." Sakura blinks, then clears her throat. "I'm Sakura Haruno. I like—" she pauses, side eyes me, then blushes a little "—music and fashion. I dislike—" here a stink eye is shot at Naruto "annoying people who don't listen. And my dream for the future is to have a happy family." Another blush.
Unprompted, Naruto goes next.
"I'm Naruto Uzumaki," he proclaims loudly. "I like ramen, don't like the three minutes you have to wait for instant ramen to get ready, and I'm gonna become the Hokage. Believe it!"
Sakura rolls her eyes, Kakashi's smile intensifies, and Naruto grins, but eventually, they all turn to me, waiting for me to speak.
But I don't speak. Because it's real; the story is real. Sure, not all of it, maybe not even most of it, but enough of it that it would be stupid to ignore it at this point.
And that terrifies me. Because, that story? The story of The Hidden Leaf? It narrates some very unsettling things.
"Hey, dumbass," Naruto says. "It's your turn."
"Shut up, Naruto," Sakura chastises.
I observe the three people before me; these three people who I know so well but might really not know at all.
I don't know why what happened last night happened. I don't how it happened. And, despite everything I now know, I don't really know what will happen going forward.
But I do know this:
"My name is Sasuke Uchiha. I like sunsets. I dislike loud noises. And my dream for the future is to be really fucking strong."
CREATORS' THOUGHTS 
Jackpot_kun
Jackpot_kun Welcome to my Naruto fic. I'm posting it here in the hopes of reaching a wider audience.
I hope you enjoy it.
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