Chapter 19: Good winter stock

"You're sure you can afford this?" Anaisa whispered desperately as the shopkeeper filled a sack with more and more food.

The cook at the manor had always done all the ordering for food, with groceries being daily delivered to the kitchens at their home in the city. Not much was ever stored there.

To see Trace so casually ask for enough food to last months, and for the shopkeeper to comply as if it was an everyday request…

Trace looked at her strangely. "Of course, it's normal to stock up before winter."

Anaisa was overwhelmed with more guilt. He was spending this much money to feed her through the winter, when she planned to be gone… well, she hadn't really decided when she planned to leave. Not yet. There was a lot to consider, like how she was going to get back to the city, but she was sure it would be far sooner than they ran out of the large amount of food he was purchasing.

Trace's one-room little home, where the barn was larger than the house and the furniture was all homemade, was on par with a modest lifestyle, but to afford this much food at one time? Perhaps, she told herself, it would keep long enough for him to eat all of it before it went bad. It wouldn't be a waste of money if it still got eaten, right?

She swallowed her guilt and tried to focus on the memory of Barnabas spitting at her, slapping her. Anaisa couldn't let minor distractions like her husband's finances distract her from her ultimate goal.

"I started a garden at the house, so we have our own supply of green onions and root vegetables in addition to daily eggs and milk. We should probably get some preserves if you don't have any experience making them, though Mom usually gives me some of what she and Sarah make…" Trace listed on until Anaisa's head spun. She put a hand on the counter to steady herself.

It seemed if she stayed here she was unlikely to go hungry ever again. Perhaps she should consider delaying her departure.

"Anaisa?" Trace said her name gently and her head snapped up to look at him with wide eyes. "I get the sense you aren't fully here. Maybe you'd like to go next door and browse fabrics while I load up? If there's a pattern or color you really like, we can get… you said you can sew?" He looked like he was trying to recall, and she nodded.

"I can sew."

"Wonderful, I'll meet you there when I finish loading the food onto the wagon." He smiled and pointed out the direction she should go.

Anaisa left in a daze. The sunshine helped her regain her concentration and she breathed deeply. This wasn't a dream. It was real. All of it?

Chewing on the inside of her mouth, Anaisa became more anxious. If Trace had sent her away yesterday when she first arrived, there would have been no hard feelings. She would have found a way back to the city somehow.

But now, seeing how much he had, that if she stayed, she would be fed easily and clothed by relatives and cared for in the comfort of a dry home to be able to prepare herself well for the journey… her head ached.

To get used to all this, and to lose it later when she ran away… perhaps he would try to stop her. Feel some ownership of her after putting so much money and effort into taking care of her.

Anaisa gritted her teeth. That couldn't be allowed to happen. She either had to leave soon or find a way to make herself independent.

His secret. If she knew it, maybe he wouldn't be able to keep her against her will. It was not the ideal way to go about things, but if being raised by her father had taught her anything, it was survival under less than ideal circumstances.

She would never want to threaten to reveal his secret to gain her freedom, but if it became necessary, the option was a good one to have. Besides, if Katia needed out of whatever marriage she found herself in, it might give Anaisa the leverage to make Trace help her sister.

Nodding to herself, Anaisa ignored the pit in her stomach. That was what she needed to do. Out of the corner of her eye she saw a strange yet familiar man staring at her, and realized she must look odd standing alone outside.

Quickly, she moved on and headed into the fabric shop. All manner of colors and patterns were draped and hung across racks in a dazzling display.

"Oh," Anaisa said in surprise. She had not expected such abundance in this small town! At least she was wearing the new dress from the king's officials and not her ragged, brown dress they'd thrown away.

"Welcome!" A man came from the back of the shop dressed in a fine suit. The cloth had to be silk! "How may I help you today, miss?"

"I'm just looking," She smiled politely, trying not to commit to purchasing. The proprietor looked curious, but his attention was needed by a woman perusing some lavender floral fabric on the other side of the shop.

Left to her own, Anaisa browsed, too scared to touch anything lest she be yelled at or required to buy it. She and Katia always had a dressmaker come and decide on what to make with their father's input on the rare occasion he needed to use them as ornaments for social advancement; the girls never had any say on their own clothing, though it usually turned out very nicely. Anaisa leaned close to a warm-looking wool fabric similar to what Trace's coat was made of. If she needed to flee during cold weather, it would keep her warm…

"I haven't seen you in town before," A voice from behind Anaisa made her whirl and clasp her hands behind her back, though she had nothing in them to hide. It was the man who had been looking at her outside.

"I haven't been here before," She replied evenly. "Why should you have seen me?"

He chuckled, his eyes taking her in from head to toe and back. Her upper lip curled with distaste. She didn't like him.

"You seem a bit familiar… regardless, I'm glad you're here now, and I do like seeing you," The stranger smirked.

"I'm afraid the feeling is not mutual," She tried to keep a lid on her temper. "I wish you a good day, sir."

"Now, now!" He chided, "No need to insult me upon our first meeting, unless you mean to intrigue me further, in which case you have succeeded. Nodding at me outside and luring me in here."

Anaisa frowned and turned back to the wool, determined to convince the man to leave her alone.

"You have misunderstood. I did not nod at you, nor did I 'lure' you anywhere. I mean only to be left in peace," Her tone grew angry at the implications he made. "Leave me be."

"But we're only just getting to know each other," The man moved closer, standing just behind her and lowering his voice. She shivered with anger and turned on him.

"I have been polite long enough," Anaisa snapped, raising her voice. "I have asked you nicely to leave me alone and you have refused. I will now tell you to your face, get away from me or you will regret it."

She wasn't above kicking, scratching, even biting someone. Her father had beaten her soundly for biting one of his drunken friends who 'accidentally wandered' into the girls' room at a house party a year ago.

The shocked looks from the other store patrons didn't bother her nearly as much as the interest in the man's eyes. He was dangerous.

"I'm not sure that I would regret it," He whispered as he stepped back and gave her a short bow before raising his voice to a level the others could overhear, "I apologize if I offended you. I hope the next time we meet will be more pleasurable."

"It doesn't seem that my wife finds any pleasure in your company, Conlan." Trace said from the doorway. "I'll thank you to leave her alone."

"Your wife?" Conlan seemed overly interested, and assessed Anaisa again. She glared at him. "I see. I was actually on my way to your home, Trace, but got distracted and decided to visit this charming store on a whim. I have a letter from our mutual friend in the city."

Trace's face darkened, startling Anaisa. He looked like a stormcloud. It scared her.

"So soon? Then deliver it so you can be on your way," He said tensely. "I'm sure you have better things to do than linger in this small town."

Conlan's catlike smile sent alarm shooting down Anaisa's spine. The man slid his gaze over to her once more, and she felt her body tense for a fight. Conlan winked at her slowly with the eye furthest from Trace so that he wouldn't see.

"Perhaps, for now, you're right, Trace. Farewell." Conlan's grin widened. He pulled a letter written on very fine paper from his inner coat pocket and handed it to Trace with a flourish. "No reply is needed, of course."

"Of course," Trace responded as he put the letter into his own pocket without even glancing at the scrawling, refined handwriting across the front of it. "Goodbye, Conlan."

"Until we meet again," Conlan turned once more to Anaisa, "I don't believe I caught your name."

"I didn't give it to you, and you don't need it," Anaisa glared openly, which only seemed to delight the man.

"Very well, then, it seems I shall have to earn the knowledge of it," He winked at her again before heading out the door whistling. "My congratulations on your nuptials. I wish you every happiness."

Suddenly, Anaisa remembered where she'd seen him before.