Chapter 350: Chapter 350: Why Don't You Ask the Dementors? (Edited)
From Professor McGonagall's perspective, her demands were reasonable, but Umbridge had no intention whatsoever of accepting them. In fact, as a mere lackey, she didn't have the authority to accept anything.
The removal of the Dementors was a matter only the Minister of Magic could order, and the current Minister was precisely an irresponsible one. Expecting Fudge to order the withdrawal of the Dementors was as unlikely as expecting Sirius Black to die in the wild from eating poisonous mushrooms.
Umbridge: Are you looking for trouble? Are you trying to make things difficult for this investigator?
"Minerva, please, don't joke!"
"I'm not joking."
Umbridge: ...
Umbridge didn't even have time to fake a smile, and in a sharp, quick tone, she shouted, "That's impossible. Minerva, I warn you that removing the Dementors is extremely dangerous. It will make Hogwarts lose protection and expose innocent children to the eyes of evil lunatics. Are you willing to take that on?"
"But Sirius Black has already managed to enter once under the eyes of the Dementors," replied McGonagall with crossed arms, looking coldly at the clown in front of her. "Even the portrait of the Fat Lady has not been repaired yet."
"I believe the school's professors, including Headmaster Dumbledore, are enough to protect the students. Not even You-Know-Who can harm them, let alone someone like Sirius Black. If we're going to be blunt, the real harm to the students comes from the Dementors that the Ministry of Magic has raised."
The last sentence completely shattered Umbridge's defenses. She started to behave defiantly: I don't hear, I don't hear.
Seeing Umbridge's uncooperative attitude, McGonagall also found herself in a difficult situation. Nonviolent noncooperation implied that they would only cooperate if violence was used. However, Umbridge was an official from the Ministry of Magic, and Hogwarts wasn't a refuge for dark wizards. How could she attack a legitimate official?
McGonagall felt powerless. The negotiations were at a standstill.
She knew it would be difficult to make the Ministry admit its mistake, and making them withdraw the Dementors was nearly impossible, but she had to try. Because this was the best opportunity to rid Hogwarts of the Dementors.
At that moment, the end-of-class bell rang. Umbridge, who was at a disadvantage in the negotiations, grabbed the opportunity like a lifeline and said to McGonagall, "McGonagall, it's lunchtime, shall we go to the Great Hall first? To be honest, I miss the pudding in the Great Hall."
"Of course," said McGonagall, taking a deep breath, and led Umbridge toward the castle, changing the subject.
Behind her, Umbridge smiled contentedly. This stratagem was something she had learned at the Ministry: when faced with a complicated problem, you could delay and wear down the other party, waiting for the right moment to find an opportunity. And, of course, she had her own hidden intentions.
During her time as a student at Hogwarts, Umbridge didn't stand out much, but now that she had "succeeded," she wanted to come back and flex her power.
...
"Next week, before class, each of you must submit an essay on the topic of werewolves, on two rolls of sheepskin parchment, focusing on how to identify a werewolf. Class dismissed!" Snape assigned the task and ended the class, leaving the young wizards lamenting in the classroom.
Tom walked out of the classroom following the flow of students, preparing to head to the Great Hall for lunch. As he walked down the corridor, he saw Professor McGonagall walking toward the Great Hall alongside a pink mass.
"Umbridge? What is she doing here?" Tom recognized the witch who had visited Hogwarts with Fudge two years ago immediately. He thought she couldn't have good intentions coming to Hogwarts; it couldn't be just to visit her old school.
Tom quickly analyzed the situation and guessed Umbridge's purpose in coming here: to clean up the mess left by the Dementors.
"Perhaps this is an opportunity I can seize?" Tom thought. He didn't want the Dementors to continue lurking in front of Hogwarts every day. If he could seize this opportunity to expel the Dementors from Hogwarts, it would be for the best. And if he couldn't, at least he should consider whether there was any chance to use Umbridge to enhance his reputation with the Dementors.
Tom began to craft his plan as he walked toward the Great Hall. At that moment, Umbridge had already taken her seat in the staff area.
But she soon regretted it.
Umbridge, dressed in a pale pink robe, suddenly drew the students' attention. Many of them were pointing and whispering as they saw her from below. That wasn't a big problem; after years of experience, Umbridge had developed thick skin in social situations. She didn't mind being pointed at.
It was what Professor McGonagall did next that got Umbridge riled up.
What really concerned Professor McGonagall was the next action. She stood up, cleared her throat, and lightly tapped the tall goblet she had in her hand to signal the students to be quiet.
"Dear students, I ask that you welcome the high-ranking Undersecretary from the Ministry of Magic, the Commissioner of Magical Law Enforcement, Miss Dolores Umbridge, who is visiting us at Hogwarts."
Professor McGonagall paused and looked at Umbridge before continuing, "As you all know, last Saturday during the Quidditch match, Dementors invaded Hogwarts and spoiled our game day. The Ministry of Magic, which has jurisdiction over the Dementors, deeply regrets this incident and has sent Miss Umbridge to assist us in investigating the recent Dementor disturbance. I'm sure she will provide us with a satisfactory response."
After introducing Umbridge, Professor McGonagall closed her mouth and waited for the young wizards to applaud Umbridge. Despite Umbridge's unfavorable image, in the end, she was there to address the Dementor problem, and the students gave her a polite applause.
The applause was slightly awkward for Umbridge, who only wanted to show off to her old school. She knew the students expected her to punish the Dementors, but her goal was completely opposite to theirs. The sincere smiles and applause from the children at that moment seemed ironic. Of course, after so many years in the Ministry of Magic, Umbridge had already shed any moral burden, so that slight discomfort soon turned into shame. Umbridge thought those little wizards were immature and only caused trouble for her and the Ministry of Magic, and Minerva, who instigated them, was particularly loathsome...
Amidst the applause, Umbridge gradually adjusted her attitude. She was clear in her mind that she only needed to give an explanation, and there would always be someone who believed her.
In the field of marketing, there's a crucial thought called "any publicity is good publicity," which means that if you want to promote an idea, even creating negative news is better than being ignored. A president who has a loose tongue and publicly abuses journalists even has voters who believe "he's human." And what if Umbridge has the backing of the Ministry of Magic and presents a logical and reasonable explanation?
However, she was naive. McGonagall's initial speech was only the beginning. What would really put her in a tight spot was McGonagall's next question.
"Miss Umbridge, could you share with the students your plans for punishing the Dementors?"
"Of course, wait, what punishment?!" Umbridge was taken aback, and her eyes widened, raising her voice slightly.
"Regardless of the Dementors' initial intent, it is undeniable that they have caused trouble for the students, so it is inevitable that they be punished." On the way to the Great Hall, McGonagall reached a conclusion: the Ministry of Magic can't openly back down, but she can make them suffer a setback in practice—punishing the Dementors in reality and then verbally debating with the Ministry of Magic.
And by doing it in front of the whole school, she could maximize the advantage of public opinion.
Indeed, upon hearing what McGonagall said, the Great Hall buzzed with discussion. The young wizards thought McGonagall was right, and the Dementors deserved punishment, regardless of their initial intent.
"My father said Dementors are just servants of wizards, and now they've dared to do this! It's unacceptable!" Draco Malfoy complained loudly while sitting at the Slytherin table. The Dementors that appeared during the match had truly annoyed him.
"No excuse should allow the Dementors to evade punishment." More and more young wizards realized this.
"Errors must be punished!" Tom raised his voice and exclaimed, which elicited agreement from the surrounding students.
Umbridge already had sweat on her forehead. Although Fudge agreed to punish the Dementors, it was the limit that the Ministry of Magic couldn't cross. And now, Minerva had bypassed the investigation and demanded the punishment of the Dementors before debating. This was truly a disaster!
What kind of negotiation starts with the bottom line of one of the parties? Furthermore, if they dared to punish the Dementors now, she couldn't even imagine what they might dare to do soon!
"Well... achieving the well-being, security, and development of all wizards is the basic principle of the Ministry of Magic. We have decided to grant the young wizards of Hogwarts real, complete, and broad power to address the problems of their most important, direct, and real interest. To achieve this, we have built a reliable, competent, efficient, and high-quality Ministry of Magic service team. Of course, we will also improve our own construction, play a role in coordinating relationships, and strive to unite and coordinate the situation. We will carry out our tasks with extraordinary determination, extraordinarily effective measures, and extraordinary work results..."
Umbridge didn't know what to say for the moment, so she recited the usual clichés she used at Ministry of Magic meetings and began to repeat them. The words were elegant and filled with ambition but didn't contribute anything real. They only had one advantage, which was that they never went wrong.
"So, does the Ministry of Magic intend to punish the Dementors? Yes or no?" Fred was somewhat confused by what he had heard, so he stood up directly and asked aloud.
"Dear student, please do not interrupt my speech. You are wasting everyone's time, with so many professors and students throughout the school, every minute you waste from all of us is equivalent to several hours of loss..." Umbridge was a little annoyed, irritated by being interrupted in her speech, irritated that Fred had asked a rather sharp question.
So she scolded him severely. According to her idea, Fred should have sat down embarrassed and in silence.
But he didn't. Fred wasn't the type to clam up over a trivial matter like this; he wasn't like that. So he ignored the angry look his brother Percy shot at him.
"Time cannot be accumulated!"
At that moment, one phrase diverted everyone's attention in the room.
"Sorry, what?" Umbridge thought she might have misunderstood something.
"I said time cannot be accumulated," Tom repeated what he had said, "one minute for one person is one minute, one minute for a group of people is still one minute, it doesn't become five minutes or ten minutes due to the increase in people. So, at most, Fred has made us all lose one minute."
Umbridge: ...
After Tom finished speaking, his fellow students around him agreed.
"Exactly!"
"That's right..."
"Miss Umbridge, I'm willing to let Fred waste my time."
All the students looked at Umbridge, waiting for her response.
"Yes" or "no," two simple words were presented to Umbridge, cornering her.
"Yes and no," Umbridge replied with her head held high, "it's an important matter that requires long-term discussion, serious and rigorous investigation."
Upon hearing this, the young wizards suddenly felt disappointed. They thought this official had come to help them vent, but it turned out they still had to wait for a long-term discussion. Did they think their situation was false?
Silence fell in the Great Hall.
"Why don't we ask the Dementors?" a clear voice echoed in the hall.
Umbridge looked towards the voice and saw a little girl with a strange outfit and pale blonde hair speaking.
The person speaking was Luna.
People around her, upon hearing her comment, covered their foreheads: This crazy girl is having another episode! How can we communicate with the Dementors? This method is too unreliable.
But Umbridge on the stage didn't think the same. After hearing Luna's words, her eyes lit up; she had found a perfect solution.
The young wizards who didn't know the truth always thought that Dementors were inhuman, cold, and cruel creatures, incapable of being understood. But in reality, it wasn't so. As an insider at the Ministry of Magic, Umbridge knew the nature of the Dementors very well.
She knew very well that these creatures could actually be communicated with. Otherwise, how could the Ministry of Magic control them and establish rules for them?
However, they were indifferent and cruel... so much so that very few people were willing to communicate with them. But the coincidence was that Umbridge was someone who could understand them and was willing to communicate with them. When she entered the Ministry of Magic years ago, she had gone through many trials to rise.
Immediately, she seized the opportunity and claimed that this was the way to go. After lunch, she would take the school's teachers to interrogate the Dementors.
Since this incident involved the Dementors, it was natural and reasonable to directly question the "creatures" involved. What could they find out...
Hehehe...
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