29Reviews
4.47
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Boss, the fanfic is amazing, love it and you got this, keep going, more chapters, keep working author-San.
................................................................................................................................................... ....
Was going in a nice direction till chapter 25 where he had the brightest ideea... adding summoning to the story turned it from a good one to garbage which is why I sent it right into my Trash list. Imagine destroying your story like this.
Reveal Spoiler
Good story with a good mc and solid world building, the only issues I have is that they writing can (only sometimes) be a bit iffy, and that the powerset of our MC is hard to understand. I personally didn’t like it very much when he got a summon feature to call forth other characters as his “followers” but luckily it hasn’t played too big of a role.
English is not my native language. I will write what shortcomings I noticed in this fanfic. The first shortcoming is the multiple strengthening in battle. If anyone does not know, this nonsense was invented by the Chinese. No one becomes stronger in battle. All that people get from battle is experience and more effective use of their skills. The second shortcoming is the unrealistic description of the main character's thoughts. In dangerous situations, people hardly think, they just do. The solution literally appears in our heads by itself, without a path of how the solution came to us. The third shortcoming is the illogicality of the system. Blood is much more difficult to control than ice. Therefore, he should have mastered ice much earlier than the battle with the bear. Mages who control tons of water can take control of blood only during the full moon. But the main character can control blood, but cannot turn water into ice and control large amounts of water. Plus, the main character is strangely weakened. Katara was so weak at the beginning because she did not have a teacher. As soon as he appeared, her development went rapidly. The main character actually has a teacher. The system itself gives him the right moves, but he is slightly stronger than Katara (at the beginning of the series).
GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD
Overall, I would say that this is a pretty, enjoyable avatar story. The main character is likable, and he is definitely going to get incredibly strong before the start of the main story, but he isn’t necessarily curb stomping the best of the best right away. He has some great teacher so far, and he takes advantage of that, as well as trying to use the system the best way possible. I also like the relationship he has with his family, making sure to take care of them, and teach them, his siblings, at least, and he cares greatly for his father and mother. This is much better than the usual trope where the main character sees his family as a burden, not caring about that one way, or another, or is nothing but story characters. He knows that this is the real world for him, that the people around him are more than characters from the show. Overall, I would say that the story is definitely worth at least checking out to see if it’s your cup of tea, and I think most Raiders will find it to be an entertaining read. overall, I would say that the story is definitely worth at least checking out to see if it’s your cup of tea, and I think most readers will find it to be an entertaining read.
I have been wanting to read this novel for month but was afraid it will be discontinued like all avatar fanfics with a gamer system. Now I am gonna have a bit of faith in you. I really hope it turns into a long novel especially for It to turn AU or MC to unite all nations to make an army to defeat otherworldly opponents or something?
[img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=Loving it][img=Loving it][img=Loving it][img=Loving it][img=Loving it][img=Loving it][img=Loving it][img=Feeling it][img=Feeling it][img=Feeling it][img=Feeling it][img=Feeling it]
untuk ceritanya sangat bagus terutama dalam pengembangan karakter. tapi menurutku karakter lain dari naruto sangat menggangu jalan cerita. untuk sistem sudah sangat bagus. cerita yang bagus.
excellente histoire qui mériterais un 5 étoile , elle les rate car les mise a jours ne sont pas stable mais chère auteur ne vous y trompé pas, j AIME votre histoire ( adore= i love it) . j ai vraiment rien a redire sur cette histoire a part les mise a jours qui sont vraiment base ( je suppose que l auteur est occupé IRL ce qui explique les 3 étoile sur la stabilité des mise a jour au lieu d un 1 étoile) j ai mis toutes les autre étoile sur 5 étoile. continué votre bon travail =) ( FRENCH)
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NxdjjdfhMhkxhdhlkkykjdkjyzkgjsjstjsjgsyjskyeuoeykekuduldkysyksykskysyksyksyosykkyzkruxrk xrnkxronuxfnuoxtnoudt7ondt7ojdjto7tj7odtj7odnto7dbt7odtn7odtn7odtb7odt7boxtuobxtn7oxtn7oxtbo7xtn8oxtbuoxtuobxt8obxtbuoxtn8pxtn8pxt8npxtubozfbukzfbukzfubkzfbukzfubkzfbukxfu
Reveal Spoiler
I just like the book so I decided to write a review, just wish updates weren't so slow.
Great story… but takes too long for updates otherwise the rating would be higher
[img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update]
Es una muy buena novela con una buena utilización de los personajes y coherencia . Un gusto poder leerla.👍
-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best
I really love Atla fics however, I hate when people make fics and add unreasonable elements (pun-intended) to them. Time and space bending... NO. with that aside, you need to go through your chapters and fix the spelling mistakes. I understand English might not be your primary language, but you can use grammerly or even AI (not for all sentences tho). Hold yourself to some standards my man.
Reveal Spoiler
Am the author so my review will certainly be biased but I really think this book deserves a 5 stars review, my opinion at least, I put a lot of time and effort into it and made sure to smooth Any rough edges, plus I learned from my previous 2 books and applied my experience here. So I hope you enjoy it.
Great potential but the mc stupid af. state points just don't exist ig. not to mention it just starts getting really random around chapter 35
Boss, the fanfic is amazing, love it and you got this, keep going, more chapters, keep working author-San.
................................................................................................................................................... ....
Was going in a nice direction till chapter 25 where he had the brightest ideea... adding summoning to the story turned it from a good one to garbage which is why I sent it right into my Trash list. Imagine destroying your story like this.
Reveal Spoiler Good story with a good mc and solid world building, the only issues I have is that they writing can (only sometimes) be a bit iffy, and that the powerset of our MC is hard to understand. I personally didn’t like it very much when he got a summon feature to call forth other characters as his “followers” but luckily it hasn’t played too big of a role.
English is not my native language. I will write what shortcomings I noticed in this fanfic. The first shortcoming is the multiple strengthening in battle. If anyone does not know, this nonsense was invented by the Chinese. No one becomes stronger in battle. All that people get from battle is experience and more effective use of their skills. The second shortcoming is the unrealistic description of the main character's thoughts. In dangerous situations, people hardly think, they just do. The solution literally appears in our heads by itself, without a path of how the solution came to us. The third shortcoming is the illogicality of the system. Blood is much more difficult to control than ice. Therefore, he should have mastered ice much earlier than the battle with the bear. Mages who control tons of water can take control of blood only during the full moon. But the main character can control blood, but cannot turn water into ice and control large amounts of water. Plus, the main character is strangely weakened. Katara was so weak at the beginning because she did not have a teacher. As soon as he appeared, her development went rapidly. The main character actually has a teacher. The system itself gives him the right moves, but he is slightly stronger than Katara (at the beginning of the series).
GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD
Overall, I would say that this is a pretty, enjoyable avatar story. The main character is likable, and he is definitely going to get incredibly strong before the start of the main story, but he isn’t necessarily curb stomping the best of the best right away. He has some great teacher so far, and he takes advantage of that, as well as trying to use the system the best way possible. I also like the relationship he has with his family, making sure to take care of them, and teach them, his siblings, at least, and he cares greatly for his father and mother. This is much better than the usual trope where the main character sees his family as a burden, not caring about that one way, or another, or is nothing but story characters. He knows that this is the real world for him, that the people around him are more than characters from the show. Overall, I would say that the story is definitely worth at least checking out to see if it’s your cup of tea, and I think most Raiders will find it to be an entertaining read. overall, I would say that the story is definitely worth at least checking out to see if it’s your cup of tea, and I think most readers will find it to be an entertaining read.
I have been wanting to read this novel for month but was afraid it will be discontinued like all avatar fanfics with a gamer system. Now I am gonna have a bit of faith in you. I really hope it turns into a long novel especially for It to turn AU or MC to unite all nations to make an army to defeat otherworldly opponents or something?
[img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=Loving it][img=Loving it][img=Loving it][img=Loving it][img=Loving it][img=Loving it][img=Loving it][img=Feeling it][img=Feeling it][img=Feeling it][img=Feeling it][img=Feeling it]
untuk ceritanya sangat bagus terutama dalam pengembangan karakter. tapi menurutku karakter lain dari naruto sangat menggangu jalan cerita. untuk sistem sudah sangat bagus. cerita yang bagus.
excellente histoire qui mériterais un 5 étoile , elle les rate car les mise a jours ne sont pas stable mais chère auteur ne vous y trompé pas, j AIME votre histoire ( adore= i love it) . j ai vraiment rien a redire sur cette histoire a part les mise a jours qui sont vraiment base ( je suppose que l auteur est occupé IRL ce qui explique les 3 étoile sur la stabilité des mise a jour au lieu d un 1 étoile) j ai mis toutes les autre étoile sur 5 étoile. continué votre bon travail =) ( FRENCH)
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NxdjjdfhMhkxhdhlkkykjdkjyzkgjsjstjsjgsyjskyeuoeykekuduldkysyksykskysyksyksyosykkyzkruxrk xrnkxronuxfnuoxtnoudt7ondt7ojdjto7tj7odtj7odnto7dbt7odtn7odtn7odtb7odt7boxtuobxtn7oxtn7oxtbo7xtn8oxtbuoxtuobxt8obxtbuoxtn8pxtn8pxt8npxtubozfbukzfbukzfubkzfbukzfubkzfbukxfu
Reveal Spoiler I just like the book so I decided to write a review, just wish updates weren't so slow.
Great story… but takes too long for updates otherwise the rating would be higher
[img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update]
Es una muy buena novela con una buena utilización de los personajes y coherencia . Un gusto poder leerla.👍
-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best-best
I really love Atla fics however, I hate when people make fics and add unreasonable elements (pun-intended) to them. Time and space bending... NO. with that aside, you need to go through your chapters and fix the spelling mistakes. I understand English might not be your primary language, but you can use grammerly or even AI (not for all sentences tho). Hold yourself to some standards my man.
Reveal Spoiler Am the author so my review will certainly be biased but I really think this book deserves a 5 stars review, my opinion at least, I put a lot of time and effort into it and made sure to smooth Any rough edges, plus I learned from my previous 2 books and applied my experience here. So I hope you enjoy it.
Great potential but the mc stupid af. state points just don't exist ig. not to mention it just starts getting really random around chapter 35