Chapter 10: Chapter 10

The next day, the lodge was a completely different place. Overnight, it had turned into a ghost town.

Dan finally sighed as we walked down the empty sidewalks between the closed shops. "I'm stuck in hell."

"What do you mean?" Ava asked.

"I know Tracy was no good, but I still can't stop thinking about what if I tried to win her back."

"Ick. She cheated on you and called you boring. Fuck her," I said.

Dan nodded solemnly. "I know, but some part of me is stuck on her."

"You're stuck on the relationship, not her. You want the comfort of knowing someone is always there. Before your breakup, you and Tracy weren't getting along. You were already hinting that she was tiring you out. You're so stuck in the dumped mindset that you forget everything else but the good times," Ava said. She was so damn smart.

"You were together for years. Losing something like that is bound to be a trip," I offered, sounding considerably less smart.

Dan gave us a nod but grew quiet. He jammed his hands in his pockets and stared at the ground as we walked.

"And what about you?" I asked Ava.

"What about me?"

"You've been daydreaming an awful lot since you met Paulo."

Ava shrugged. "I liked him. I liked him a lot, but it doesn't matter. Can you imagine him and I dating while you and Chance hated each other? It would put stress on the relationship, and we'd never make it. I love you more than any guy."

I grinned at her. "I still think you're being stupid. The two of you were cute together." I pulled a slightly crushed bag of chips out of my coat pocket and started munching.

Ava shrugged again and looked away from me. "We were, but he hasn't even tried to talk to me since, and I've seen him around more than a few times. If he's not going to fight for me now, how will he handle me when we get serious, and I inevitably get cold feet?"

I laughed. That particular scenario had played out a few times, to say the least. Not one man had fought hard enough to keep Ava around. That was all she needed. Someone loyal enough to fight for her. She was totally worth it.

We stopped at a small gazebo and looked up at Mount Rika. The day was deceptively sunny, and tiny specks could be seen skiing down the slopes. The wind whistled past us softly, and the icy breeze lifted my hair. For as much as I hated being cold, I actually liked that classic cold smell that always seemed to permeate the air in the winter.

"I can't believe people are still skiing," Ava said.

"I mean, what else are the people who are staying going to do? They might as well continue on with their vacation," I said.

Dan looked up at the mountain. "What about you, Ryann? Are you ever going to decide a man is worthy enough for your attention?"

Yikes.

"It's not about worth."

"No, it's about you being too afraid to commit," Ava said, her tone laughing.

That was only half of my problem. "I'm not afraid of commitment."

"You couldn't even commit to a degree." Dan laughed. "Every room in your apartment has been painted except yours because Ava refused to pick for you. When you go to study, you always take multiple subjects because you can't choose just one. Admit it."

I might have had a tiny fear of commitment, but there was so much more to my problem than something so simple. It wasn't like my fears were irrational. I knew for a fact that I was hard to love. Ava and Dan were the only people to actually love me, and I was so tired of being hurt by those who should.

"Never." I huffed between bites of chips. "I committed to you two."

"Yes, but we're the only ones. You won't let anyone in close enough to become good friends because then you might have to choose them over us at some point."

Close, but that wasn't the reason. I didn't trust anyone else not to hurt me the way everyone else had. Dan and Ava had snuck past my defenses, but I'd since learned the signs of friendship and could prevent anyone else from getting too close.

I glared at Ava. "Do you want me to pick other people over you?"

"Of course not, but you should at least have the option. Dan and I have plenty of other friends. You just have us."

I tried to cross my arms over my chest, but they were too poofy, and it was too hard. "I happen to think the two of you are more than enough."

"You're more than enough too, Ryann. You know that, right?" Ava said softly.

I pushed a swallow through my tight throat and looked away.

Ava wrapped her arm around my shoulders, and Dan wrapped his around my waist, creating an awesome group hug. Together we stared up at the mountain, and they let it drop. Despite their harsh observations, I'd meant what I said. Why on earth would I need anyone else when I had them?

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