Chapter 17: Don't Get A Vasectomy!
Attention all Ladies and Gentlemen:
Do not force or your man to get a Vasectomy! It's unnatural and agonizing!
I had mine a few months ago and I haven't been the same again. Now when I go to take a pee I hesitate more than normal. My nuts now tend to straddle my boxers in a very uncomfortable way. I am just now getting over the emotional trauma of the initial recovery period.
The "doctor" only gave me a Valium to attempt to calm my nerves, but I took two Xanax as well just to be safe. It didn't help because I felt every single maneuver, from the time they taped my abnormally huge wee-wee to my stomach all the way to the time I was getting shots in my little nut tubes.
So the "tiny" incision, which was not tiny at all in my mind, hurt like a motherfucker. It may have only been a 1/4" long but to me it felt as if my entire nut sack had been split and flipped inside out! Then the doctor begins giving me all these shots to numb my nuts and the tubes and what not, OUCH! It seemed as if he were operating on my heart, that's how far the pain traveled through my body.
Twenty minutes laying on a table with my wee-wee taped to my stomach and my nut sack cut open...horrible. I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night just whimpering and clutching my nuts with both hands. It's kind of like the horrible dreams that Vietnam veterans have.
Knowing what I know now, it would have been condoms for life for me! If I had a time machine I would travel back to right before and bitch out. No one will ever touch my nuts again, even if it is in a sensual fashion!
Don't let the Ladies trick you guys! It's just 20 minutes and it's cheaper. But the 2 weeks of pain that follows...that's the kicker! Don't fall for it like I did.
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