Chapter 12: VOICES IN HER HEAD
Zuri hadn't decided on a punishment for Faye yet. To be honest, she didn't even want to see her again, even though she had an upper hand right now and that omega's fate was in her hands. She could ban her from this pack, just like her father told her to do.
However, that was not what she really wanted. She didn't know what she wanted. In her eyes, both Xaden and Faye were the same. It wouldn't have come to this if Xaden had been committed to this union.
"You need to lose a little more weight," Karina said, as she helped Zuri bathe.
Her mother came to her bedroom suddenly before she dismissed Esther and Sarah and took over their job of bathing her.
It had been a while since her mother saw her naked and she was always obsessed with her figure. She would know if Zuri gained even an ounce more weight and would tell her to stop eating like a pig.
"I was recovering." From miscarriage.
Zuri didn't say the latter part out loud. She still felt weird with the very idea. It felt like someone gave her something, but it was gone even before she knew what it was. It also didn't help that she had been spending her time in bed, pretending to be sick and recuperating when the truth was; she simply felt tired.
She was exhausted, even though she did nothing but sleep all day long.
Therefore, in the past few weeks, she had just been sleeping and eating. And because of what happened to her, nobody thought much. They assumed she was mourning the loss of her baby and Zuri didn't have the energy to correct them.
"You need to lose weight."
That was all her mother said. There was no arguing with her about it. She wanted her to look perfect. Because in her twisted mind, the best weapon for women like them was their body. They needed to appear appealing in order to capture their mate's attention, only then they could have a comfortable life and their word weighed something.
"Zuri, do you understand me?" Karina scrubbed her skin raw. It was too hard for her liking, but she didn't protest. She was used to the pain. Everyone in her life tried to hurt her.
"Yes, mother." The answer came instantly, she had no other option to answer her differently.
Karina looked at her daughter and sighed. She rubbed in more soap and scrubbed her skin again before she washed her hair.
The silence inside the bathroom was a little bit depressing and uncomfortable. Zuri wanted this to be over, but after bathing, something more awful was waiting for her.
"I know you don't like this," Karina said when Zuri was about to close her eyes. "This will be over soon."
"Do you even know that Father and my mate had been planning a treason?" Zuri blurted out and the fact it didn't surprise Karina told her what she needed to know.
"Men always crave power." It almost sounded like she was justifying it. "We, as women, should support them. They are our… mates. Our alphas. They own us."
Zuri didn't say anything, only because it was pointless. Her mother was raised with such beliefs and that became her survival instinct. It worked for Karina, but for her…
Zuri closed her eyes again when her mother reminded her to lose weight. She wanted her to be as skinny as a stick.
After that, Karina left the bathroom to prepare a night gown for her. Alpha Xaden and Zuri would spend the night together.
The alpha had been away and with the reason Zuri was still recovering, Xaden slept in a different room, but starting from tonight, they would sleep together again.
The thought of that was nauseating to Zuri. She felt like there were a hundred bricks pressing down on her chest, making her unable to breath. She felt like the walls were closing in on her.
Clenching her fist, Zuri began to pound it against her chest, as if it could help relieve this suffocating feeling.
"Zuri, come out now," Karina shouted from outside the door.
Zuri opened her eyes. She was still in the bathroom. The walls were not closing in on her and there was not a brick in the vicinity. She looked up and saw her reflection in the mirror. She fixed her expression and walked out of the bathroom with an impassive face.
A revealing nightdress lay on the bed, and her mother told her to wear it. She did, without making a peep, and Karina said a few things again before she left the bedroom. Zuri didn't follow what she was saying. It must be some bullshit about how to please Xaden. They had this conversation before the mating and marking ceremony. Zuri didn't need to hear that again.
Zuri stood next to the bed and stared at the door when it swung open and revealed Xaden's figure. The alpha was tall and big. His body looked like it was built with muscles. He was handsome with brown eyes that looked almost dark and those eyes were on her.
Just like all the alphas, he exuded power and authority. Even without saying anything, his presence was strong enough and he looked calm and composed, tempting Zuri to scratch his face.
'Scratch him.'
'Kick him.'
'Claw him.'
There. The voices echoed in her head. This was what happened when she didn't drink her medicine. These heathen voices would urge her to do something outrageous, daring her to follow through.
"Let's get it over with quickly," Xaden said.
How sweet. That was the first thing he said to his mate when he was going to fuck her.
'Blood will look good on him.'
'Cut his throat.'
'Gauge his eyes out.'
"Let's do it." Zuri tuned out the voices in her head and started to undress herself. She couldn't see the point in herself wearing this dress in the first place.
Xaden did the same. It was only a task for them.
Gifts
-- Gift
received Weekly Power Status
-- Power
Ranking 
-- Power
stone