Chapter 17: The Misadventures of Gladys and Jack
I don't own fallout. Or anything else for that matter
"Roads go ever ever on,
Over rock and under tree,
By caves where never sun has shone,
By streams that never find the sea"
The gravelly female voice echoed over the air as a light wind blasted across the wasteland, carrying the otherwise melodious song with it. Soon three figures could be seen over the horizon wandering the long-cracked road. Two ghouls; a male and female. And a lone NCR ranger dressed in typical ranger garb, his armor, and a duster coat.
"Still doesn't sound like a song…" the male ghoul said. He was dressed in a duster filled with old bullet holes, a buttoned-up shirt, jeans, and a wide brim hat with a Jack of hearts and a Jack of spades held by the banding. His two, perfectly good, lightly golden eyes twinkled mischievously at the female ghoul as he said it. It had long been a subject of contention, but it was also his way of breaking the silence.
The female ghoul, much more imposing looking in her old-world Police vest with SWAT on the front and a ballisticaly-lined duster coat narrowed her bright blue eyes at him. Her hair, once a lustrous golden blonde hung like a loose stringy curtain around her head beneath the RAID scarf she wore. "One day Jacques, you will want to hear my singing."
"But not now." He replied with a knowing grin at her that she playfully returned.
"As usual, will you two just find a room and work it out?" The ranger said jokingly, thrusting his hips back and forth as he walked in a suggestive motion. "I haven't felt so much sexual tension since I hid from those Deathclaws having an orgy near Spud Town."
"Thanks for that Wolfe, I didn't want to sleep tonight." Ranger K.C. Wolfe laughed as Jack scowled at the very idea.
Ranger Wolfe was in his late forties and his graying black hair showed it. He rubbed his grizzled unshaven face, still smiling at the two ghouls he had come to consider close friends. Due to a little NCR red-tape, he had found himself working with the two freelancers, that was over three years ago. Since then he also found it was a much more lucrative arrangement to hire the two over his own people. The two ghouls had generations of knowledge, experience, and skill matched only by a team of NCR veterans, but much cheaper to maintain.
"As a matter of fact, Gladys; I happen to enjoy your singing." He added with a polite smile.
Gladys grinned at the old ranger, "Wolfe you are such a charmer." If she wasn't a walking corpse and about 100 some odd years younger, she might have considered a relationship with him. But he was married, and his youngest son was entering Bootcamp this year. Last she checked, he was already the grandfather of a four-year-old girl.
"Eh, don't tell the wife." He smiled back jokingly, but then he frowned, scanning the vast wasteland of dirt and long dead trees ahead. "…Just like the reports say. Not a raider in sight."
Jack snorted, standing next to the ranger as he pushed his coat open, resting his hands on the hilt of his twin revolvers in readiness. "…We should've been able to at least spot something right? Nobody walks through the wasteland without something trying to kill them."
Wolfe nodded slowly, his own hand resting cautiously on his sequoia hilt, "…It's just too quiet. Gladys?"
She yawned resting a lever action rifle on her shoulder, she also carried a combat shotgun from her old policing days but that was strapped to her back. "Je suis d'accord les garçons."
"Darlin, your speaking native again." Jack said with a playful smile Gladys gave him a similar smile and an unnerving look, but she acknowledged it with a roll of her blue eyes.
"I agree boys… I'd like to say no raiders is a good thing, but you can't trust that out here."
Wolfe snorted in agreement and gestured for them to follow him as he walked on towards one of the more intact dilapidated houses off the road they were walking. "Might as well take a break, it's getting late anyway…" Gladys hummed her song walking along behind Wolfe as Jack's gaze lingered around, watching the area before he too followed.
"Bloatflies." Wolfe said as they closed in on the two-storied building, it was intact compared to its hollowed-out neighbors. He recognized the familiar annoying sound, pulling his sequoia but Gladys scoffed.
"Ah-ah don't waste your bullets." She said confidently, cocking her rifle and holding it to her eye as Jack drew one of his pistols. "Bet I get more than you Jacques." She cooed as the old cowboy held out the revolver just as a small swarm of a dozen Bloatflies buzzed through the windows. Almost immediately half of them were dead as the gunslinging ghouls put them down.
"Got four!" Jack shouted happily as he holstered his revolver and drew the other one, already firing into the mass as her lever action put down another three.
"Two with one Jacques!" she replied killing two bloatflies with one bullet as if that feat was far more impressive. Opinions may differ as Gladys won the 'game'.
"Ah you got more stopping power." He noted sourly, like the good sportsman he was. She grinned, however, easily punting a dead bloatfly with a perfect 'football' kick far away from the house.
"Sourpuss doesn't suit you, Jacques." She noted as Ranger Wolfe pushed open the front door. Frowned thoughtfully and closed it.
"Let's find another."
"What's wrong with-" but even as Jack said it he scowled and covered the stub that used to be his nose. "…What's rotting in there?" he asked as Ranger Wolfe stepped away.
"About… a caravan and a half." He noted as Gladys shook her head sadly. "It explains the large number of flies, but not the lack of raiders."
"Dead Caravans usually mean raiders." Jack said as Wolfe pulled a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and lit one up with a New Vegas matchbook, puffing the cigarette absently as he offered Jack one, Jack shook his head, politely declining.
"Yeah, but they do it in the open. Why hid their work?" Ranger Wolfe frowned, reaching into his coat and pulling out his Ranger Map. "…This is the Bonemunchers territory. Cannibal Clan. Those bodies were way too intact to have been killed by a cannibal clan." adding disdainfully. "Too much meat left behind."
"We also passed through that other raider territory…" Gladys looked over Ranger Wolfe's shoulder on the other side, pointing somewhere near where Arizona used to be. "The Rabids? No sign of them either…"
"Lot of gnarled bones though." Jack noted, punting another bloatfly not nearly as far as Gladys had. "So… what? Did they switch turfs or something?"
"…Maybe something worse." Wolfe noted sourly, "…More like, and this is my theory, some big boss is grouping up the scattered clans. Why can't they just kill each other like everyone else?" he puffed a cloud of smoke as he exhaled.
Gladys merely shrugged as Jack pulled out a whiskey flask and took a sip. "Well. Are we still going to camp?"
"Not in there." Wolfe reminded her, "Let's head on."
Jack however shook his head and pointed eastward, the direction they were heading, "…Storm. Bad one too." The unmistakable sight of an oncoming dust storm raging far ahead, but it was coming at them fast. "We either suck it up or try one of these other wreaks."
Ranger Wolfe eyed a few of the other houses and pointed, "That one. The one missing part of the second floor. It looks as secure as we're going to get." They approached the front door, testing it briefly and finding it locked.
"Darlin." Jack noted stepping aside as Gladys took a bobby pin from her pocket and knelt before the lock. Humming softly to herself as Wolfe eyed the storm… it was speeding up.
"I'd hate to rush you Gladys." He said hesitantly, watching as it swirled and curled like an avalanche of dust.
"Terminé." She said with a smile as the door clicked open and they entered, Jack slamming the door behind them just as a rumbling roar outside struck the house. It shook briefly at the sudden storm's anger but seemed to still as Jack leaned against the door.
"…Well… shit." He mumbled, "…I'll take that cigarette now if you're offering." He said to Wolfe who was about to hand the pack to him only for Gladys to give them both a look.
"Not in the house." she said primly as Jack sighed, pulling out his whiskey flask instead and shrugging at Wolfe who merely smirked. Jack offered him the flask and he took a swig as well. "… Let's see if this place has anything." Gladys said notedly, beginning to explore.
"Dibs on the bed if we got one." Jack replied as Wolfe began to check his map.
"Probably got bones in it." Wolfe noted to himself, rubbing his scruffy chin. "All old houses do." He added sadly as he dusted off an armchair and sat in it, trying to figure out a proper course. They needed to figure out where the raiders were. And make sure they weren't grouping up. Big raider groups meant big problems…
"Ah! Merde!" Gladys hissed angrily from somewhere in the house as Jack suddenly came rushing from the other room.
"You alright!?" he shouted concerned, already drawing a revolver and rushing to find her.
"Yes, I'm fine…" she replied a little angrily, "I just tripped over…" she paused, "Wolfe! Come see this!"
Wolfe blinked, folded his map and joined them in the room. It was some sort of storage room. It still had traces of canned food, gas cans, a liquor bottle or two… and a hatch on the floor. "That's new." He mumbled, kneeling towards the wheel handle and gripping it. "Jack?"
Jack knelt by it as well, and together they turned the squeaking hinge as Gladys drew her combat shotgun, standing over them. It wouldn't be the first hidden room they opened that had a feral ghoul or two. It opened up, leading to a ladder into an old safe room…
"Anything?" Jack asked as Wolfe began to climb down, he lit a match once he reached the bottom and looked around.
"It looks like a fallout shelter. There are a couple of beds, food, some trinkets… gas cans, duct tape."
"Oh, sweet grab me a roll." Jack said as Gladys glanced at him. A silver wheel of duct tape jumped from the hole as Jack caught it and shoved in his coat pocket.
"Seriously?" she asked.
"What? Never underestimate duct tape." Jack replied.
Wolfe released an audible sigh in the hole. "Nothing but depression down here…" the house suddenly creaked and groaned, a sandy breeze blasting through. Gladys frowned.
"It's not much better up here…" she added as Wolfe climbed back up.
"At least we're safe for now." He noted, "And the place is clear." He climbed all the way out as Jack shut the hatch, "I'll take first watch." He noted, pulling out his map again and heading back into the living room as the storm roared outside.
Hours later Jack had parked himself on the couch, dozing softly as Gladys had taken the main bedroom. Wolfe rubbed his eyes as he examined his map. The Rabids were gone, the Ragers were killed off, the last of the Fiends moved out and headed further north towards the Mojave, and now the Bonemunchers are missing. Gladys is right, less raiders were a good thing. If they were dead. But only the Ragers were killed and that was done by a team of NCR rangers…
The Rabids and the Bonemunchers… he had hoped they didn't join up together, but that was the most likely option. Wouldn't be the first time some Raider boss wanted to make their own kingdom and grouped up other gangs. He had heard of a place far to the east where an old theme park was conquered.
He shook his head, trying to shake off the sleep that was trying to claim him. Getting up and walking to the window he watched as the sandstorm raged outside, he couldn't even see a foot from the window. He shut the shutters as the windows rattled, securing them tightly and walking around the house, making sure he could shut what could be shut. There was a window long ago smashed that was blowing loudly into the room, he secured the shutters, then shut the door. Rubbing his chin as Jack rolled over on the couch.
With everything secured and double-checked, he sat back down on the armchair, frowning as listened to the storm. He started to doze again, becoming sleepy once more. He grunted to himself, and got back up. But froze… listening… the storm was still going but it had calmed down enough so he could hear outside…
"Stupid humans! I'm hungry! Why do we have to hunt down dumb-dumbs!"
"Shut up! You let them get away! Clubba told you to watch them and you didn't watch them! So you find them or Clubba eat you!"
"Shit." Wolfe hissed, scrambling to Jack and shaking him.
"Wha-" Jack was startled awake but Wolfe covered his mouth, holding a finger to his lips with his other hand before drawing his sequoia.
"…Get Gladys." He said softly, as Jack drew one of his revolvers, quietly moving into the bedroom to shake Gladys awake as Wolfe returned to the window, listing as more voices began to argue. Super Mutants. Worse than a cannibal clan of raiders but just as hungry. There were at least four and they were all arguing loudly. From what he could see they were wrapped heavily in clothing, shirts, pants, scarves whatever they could to cover themselves from the storm. They would've been comical to look at if they weren't seven feet tall, 300 pounds of angry muscle.
"…We going to ambush them?" Jack asked as he and Gladys held their weapons at the ready.
"…I think I'd rather follow them." Wolfe noted softly. "…We might want to know what they're doing."
Jack frowned and Gladys shook her head, they didn't like the idea. One Super Mutant was one too many in their books, they were all better off shot. "What do we care what they're doing! I'd rather shoot them now and save any town nearby." Gladys said in a harsh whisper, as the mutants began to argue louder. The three immediately silenced as the argument suddenly ended with an audible shotgun blast.
"OWW!" roared one of the mutants then all hell broke loose. They started firing their guns at each other, a stray bullet piercing through the wall of their house just over Jack's head, he fell down cursing silently as Gladys and Wolfe hit the deck as well.
"Stop! STOP!!" roared one the mutants, louder than the others. "Stop Fighting! Find the dumb-dumbs! Take them back to Clubba!"
"Dumb-dumbs are long gone! Let's go back! Say scorpions got them."
"If gone then we get new ones! Find more dumb-dumbs for Clubba!"
"…They're hunting for people?…" Wolfe frowned thoughtfully, "Why?"
Jack frowned then eyed Wolfe coolly, "…I heard stories from an old ghoul once. Name of Harold. Said that the mutants gathered people to dip them in FEV. Turn them into more mutants…"
Wolfe scowled angrily, that would be bad if true. Raider-raised Super mutants sounded particularly awful. "Now can we shoot them?" Gladys asked, her voice dangerously cold. She HATED super mutants, even more than raiders.
Wolfe rolled his eyes, "Fine." He said finally, all three of them getting to their feet as the Mutant's arguing continued outside, the storm dying down around them into a low hum. Gladys took her RAID bandana and covered her face, as well as pulled out some old goggles for her eyes, Jack did the same. Wolfe just put on his gas mask helmet. "Gladys and I will draw their fire. Jack. Go out the back and circle around to ambush them. But try to leave one alive… I want him to run."
Jack nodded understanding, staying low as he headed out the back door.
"... Leave one alive?" Gladys asked casually as Wolfe nodded, his voice modulated by the mask.
"I want to follow him back to his hideout. I don't care if they KILL the raiders, but I don't want more mutants in the process."
"Kill them all." Gladys said firmly, opening the window shutters slowly as she peaked the sill, the mutants were STILL arguing. One of them threw a punch. "…At least they aren't smart mutants."
Wolfe eyed the four of them, all towering and bulky. "…Sledgehammer, Shotgun, two hunting rifles." He said, making notes of their weapons. His eyes however flickered too across the dirt street, a slight glance of Jack could be seen. "Get ready. I'll go first." He said, approaching the door, and opening it ever so slightly. Luckily the arguing made sure the super mutants didn't hear it creak open.
As if synched together, they attacked. Wolfe swung the door open, the mutants turned to him surprised seconds before the sequoia fired a bullet at one of the mutants carrying a hunting rifle. Its head exploded as the bullet slammed through its eyed and out the back.
"Attack!" roared out the shotgun mutant, seconds before Jack emptied his revolvers into the back of the second hunting rifle mutant. He stumbled towards the house just as an explosion ripped through the glass window as Gladys pumped her shotgun into his chest.
The sledgehammer mutant charged forward towards Wolfe swinging hard and ripping through the doorframe as Wolfe ducked, blasting his knee as he dove backward. The Mutant stumbled forward still swinging his hammer at Wolfe as Gladys pumped another shotgun blast into its head, splattering the wall as the last mutant fired at Jack. Jack dove behind cover as the shot blasted a hole in the rotten wall of the house he was using for cover.
A collection of bullets plowed through the mutant's body as Wolfe, Gladys, and Jack peppered him full of holes as it dropped to the ground dead. "So much for leaving one alive…" Gladys noted as Jack approached them, checking his coat for new holes.
"Going to need a new one at this rate." He grumbled, shoving a gloved finger through a fresh hole sourly.
"It builds character." Gladys said charmingly, "I think it makes you look rugged." She added as Jack seemed to cheer up.
Wolfe however kicked a dead mutant corpse, scowling angrily. This was a minor solution to possibly a big problem. Jack examined a few of the corpses as Wolfe had a silent tantrum. Jack eventually pulled up a rolled-up piece of paper and opened it. He smirked. "Wolfe. Is it me? or does this look like a map to you?"
Wolfe took it, carefully examining it. "It's a map alright… it has got raider territories marked all over it, along with a few settlements…" he scowled, looking eastward. "…It looks like they came from that direction if I'm reading this right."
"Then I assume that's where we are going?" Gladys asked, reloading her combat shotgun as Jack reloaded his revolvers.
Wolfe frowned, he didn't like the idea of a horde of mutants running around the wasteland if he could do anything about it. Best case scenario they scout it first before he radioed for backup. He nodded as the two ghouls grinned, "Yes. But only to get the lay of the land. We need to see what they're up to."
"Well let's get some more sleep first. You look dead tired Wolfe." The ranger rubbed his eyes, they did attack once his watch was over. "…Alright. Let's find a new house…" he eyed the dead mutants, "…Preferably away from the corpses." He said, walking down the road away from the ghost town.
Gladys smiled at Jack as he too walked on after Wolfe. Gladys soon began singing again as she followed.
"Over snow by winter sown,
And through the merry flowers of June,
Over grass and over stone,
And under mountains in the moon."
And this time Jack didn't tell her to stop.
End of Chapter.
Sorry to any possible confusion, the last chapter was the end of Arc 1, there are three total, and this is technically the beginning of Arc 2 despite it being a flashback. We'll be back to our regularly scheduled Swat later
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