Chapter 1047: 20
Chapter 20: XX
Notes:
Woohoo! Chapter 20 already! (And we're still during vacation xD)
I feel like the lengths of these chapters is getting somewhat out of hand, lol. I normally aim for around 3000 words per chapter, plus/minus. Currently I'm averaging quite a bit above that. The last two chaptes were originally meant to just be one chapter, but i split it, because 9000 words was too long for me... who even reads that much in one go? I don't want to overwhelm you after all... But this chapter is long again.... It's almost 7000 words... But this time I decided not to split it. The plot has to move after all. So...long chapter ahead.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Kakashi pulled up the turtleneck collar of his sweater. It wasn't quite long enough to reach to his nose, but if he ducked his head a little, it covered his mouth at least. Kakashi hadn't thought about how odd it felt to run around with his face bare like that. Nowadays, he didn't even pull down the mask when he slept. Walking around in public without it, made him feel oddly naked. The breeze hitting his cheeks directly felt almost cold despite it being the middle of August. He had spent a few days in the Leaky Cauldron now, and he became increasingly restless.
"Charlie!" Harry's voice made him look up. Kakashi had followed a family to Diagon Alley. He still couldn't open the passage with his own wand, which was inconvenient, but nothing he couldn't get around. It made researching the passage almost impossible, though.
Harry stood at the main entrance of Quality Quidditch Supplies. Kakashi, who had only come for an exploration of the area, and had nothing better to do, walked up to him.
"Charlie, look!" Harry grabbed Kakashi by his sleeve – Kakashi got increasingly used to sudden physical contact and didn't immediately rip free anymore. Then Harry pulled him into the shop. He pointed at a sleek aerodynamic broom with a shiny dark varnish. It was mounted on a podium. A sign next to the broom called it 'the Firebolt'.
Kakashi already knew that some wizards owned brooms like that, apparently. He couldn't figure out what they were supposed to be good for. Harry himself owned one too, though it looked a little different.
"It's the Firebolt," Harry said needlessly because Kakashi could read. "The newest model. Fastest broom ever."
"Yes indeed," the proprietor walked up to them. "You're completely correct there, young man. The Irish International Side just ordered seven of them." He nodded with the smile of a vendor who remembered a good deal. "Next year during the World Cup, most teams will fly one, I reckon."
Kakashi still couldn't begin to guess what the brooms were for. When Harry called it the fastest broom, with excitedly sparkling eyes, he surely didn't mean the 'fastest sweeping' broom. Kakashi scrutinized the new model. It had two handles at the lower end of the broomstick. Wait… Those weren't handles. In his mind, he turned the broom around. Those were for the feet. The brooms were meant to be sat on, he realized. So, they were probably a means of transport. An odd decision to travel by broom, Kakashi thought with a shake of his head.
He wasn't all that interested in brooms. He couldn't use a wand. Why would brooms be any different?
The proprietor had by now turned away from the two boys and started talking to two wizards who had just come into the shop.
"You already have a broom," Kakashi reminded Harry who was looking at the broom again, with big longing eyes. Clearly, this thing was expensive, Kakashi thought. They didn't even dare to write the prize on the sign.
Harry blinked in surprise. "Oh, yeah. I have a Nimbus 2000," he spoke as if Kakashi was supposed to know what that was. He took a step away from the podium. "I can't afford it anyway," he muttered. "Not without half-emptying my vault."
Together they left the shop again as if Harry only wanted to show him the broom.
"Harry! Over here, Harry!" A plump and red-faced boy came running up to them. He waved as he ran, and then tripped over the cobblestone. As he fell, he grabbed onto the closest thing he could find, which was Kakashi's shoulder.
For a moment, Kakashi was grateful that the boy had yelled at them before he came running because Kakashi didn't know how he would have reacted if he hadn't. If some unknown kid just came running and grabbed him like that… Kakashi balled his fists in his pockets but quickly loosened up again. When the boy let go of him, with an apologetic and shy smile, Kakashi took a step back to get some distance.
"Sorry, sorry, I… I tripped." He looked from Kakashi to Harry, then back to Kakashi. "I'm Neville, by the way, I'm...uhm… Harry and I are classmates."
"Neville is a friend," Harry said a stubborn little frown on his face. The way the chubby boy's round face lit up happily was quite endearing, Kakashi thought.
"Yes. And you…" Neville sounded uncertain. "I don't know you from Hogwarts. Are you Harry's cousin or…?"
"No, I only met him a week ago," Harry quickly interrupted with a grimace. "He's a wizard Neville, he just doesn't go to Hogwarts. But, uhm…"
"Charlie," Kakashi introduced himself when Harry failed to give his name. He shook hands with Neville. The boy turned beet red when Kakashi took his hand.
"That reminds me," Harry muttered under his breath as he rummaged through his pockets. "This came for you this morning." He handed Kakashi a crumpled envelope. "I couldn't find you at breakfast," he added sheepishly.
When Kakashi took the envelope, he found a ministry insignia on the front. His own name was scribbled below the insignia in dark blue ink. "Thank you." Without bothering to tell his goodbyes, he left the two boys. He felt surprisingly nervous. If the ministry denied his plea, he'd have to infiltrate Hogwarts some other way. He was confident he could probably do it, but Hogwarts – like most things in the magical world – was still a big unknown for him.
Dear Mr. Major, the letter read, concerning your inquiry regarding a late enrollment into Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, we would like to invite you to a short interview in our offices. Attached you'll find a Ministry of Magic visitor's pass. We would like to welcome you at 11:00 am on August 23, 1993, in Room 304.3G. "
As he read further on, they gave him the address and asked for him to bring all personal papers he had available – which were none. The letter was signed by Miranda Drummer from the Department of Magical Education.
The meeting would be two days from now, which was fine by him. Charlie's cover story was ready and Kakashi was already getting impatient anyway. He was ready to take the next step.
**
"I don't let my comrades die."
"I don't let my friends die."
The voices merged into each other. He couldn't even say who spoke anymore.
"Did you kill before?"
"Can't kill me."
"I know war."
Sirius woke with a violent start. The words were echoing in his mind like a curse. There was darkness all around him, his paws were wet, his belly dripping with some liquid.
For a moment he thought he was back in the London sewers, but then he remembered. He was already well on his way north. The evening before he had all but passed out along a shallow brook near Huntingdon. As he slept, turning in his nightmares, he must have slipped partly into the water. It was cool on this August night. Still tired from days of walking, and aching in his bones, Sirius shook himself, before he drank from the brook.
It was the middle of the night, and he was alone and away from the city. The first time since wading through the London sewer systems he dared to turn back into a human. The stench was still in his clothes. As a dog, he had bathed many times, but he couldn't wash his clothes like that. As he turned back, his clothes were stiff from the dried dirt. He peeled them off his starved body and submerged them into the water.
Naked, he knelt in the knee-high water and scrubbed the detested prison garbs. He used rocks to get as much of the dirt out as possible. Several times, he accidentally ripped the cotton, but he didn't care that much about it. It was already little more than rags anyway. Part of him wanted to rip them into tiny pieces, burn them and throw the ashes in the water… but he had nothing else to wear, so instead, he hastily cleaned them as well as he could. He was terrified that somebody would find him, despite it being the middle of the night, and despite the closest settlement being almost a mile away.
After fifteen minutes, he pulled the garbs out of the water. Sirius wrung them out as much as he could, then he hung them over a bush to let them dry a bit. Just as a cool breeze gripped his bare body, he stepped back into the brook. Sirius knelt to wash his legs, his arms, his torso, and face. He scrubbed so hard, that the goosebumps that had formed with the breeze were soon replaced by burning red scratch marks.
Sirius was secretly grateful for the darkness. That way he didn't have to see the ruins of his own body. He could imagine it anyway. That was horrific enough. Irritated, he scratched at a few old rashes and flee-bites.
He put his head underwater. Washing his hair was impossible. He'd have to cut it off as soon as he found a knife or something like that. It was a tangled, matted mess of black curls. If only he had kept one of Kakashi's knives, he thought.
I know war.
He started, freeing his head from the water. He had heard the voice as clear as day. Searching he looked this way and that, hair dripping from his mane, but he saw nothing but darkness and the silhouettes of stones, trees, and bushes in the pale light of the crescent moon.
I know war.
"What did you mean?" Sirius asked into the night.
I crushed his windpipe, I'm sure of it.
No… no, no. Sirius refused to believe it. Even as he saw it with his own eyes, it couldn't be true. It was Polyjuice, or his mind playing a trick on him. Kakashi, kind and caring Kakashi, who had laughed with him and fed him…was not the same man who had come into the ministry to kill and to…
We're getting out of here.
I don't let my comrades (Friends! It was friends!) die.
Keep him safe.
He had come to save him. Had he broken into the ministry, just to save him? How did he even do that? How was that possible?
Sirius was unable to consolidate the kind teenager he had met in Norfolk, the boy he had traveled with, who had cooked for him and fed him, with the cold-blooded murderer he had met in the ministry holding cells. Those were two different people. They couldn't be one person. Kakashi, he was certain, hadn't even known about magic. How would he suddenly have good enough control over it, to not just break into the ministry, and also take out several highly trained aurors? Did he even have a wand?
Did he have a wand? Sirius' spiraling thoughts ground to a sudden halt. He had never seen Kakashi with a wand, not during their journey, nor in the holding cells.
All of this made no sense to him. Kakashi, he was certain, didn't have a wand. He had weird knives and wire and needles, Sirius had seen all of that, but he had never seen a wand. Surely, he would have at least glimpsed it during these last two weeks.
The fire…
He remembered, when he first met Kakashi, how he thought he started fires out of nothing, but later on, after Kakashi knew who he was, he had used tools to create a fire. After a few days, Sirius had simply chalked it up to faulty memory, but what if it wasn't… Wandless magic?
I know war. Did you kill before?
Sirius shook his head forcefully, water spraying in all directions. He fisted his fingers into his hair, pulled on it until it hurt until the pain brought a stop to his racing thoughts. Stumbling out of the water, he half fell on the undergrowth surrounding the brook. He slung thin arms around gnarly knees.
I know war. I crushed his windpipe, I'm sure.
It made no sense. It made no sense. It made no sense.
But however often he told himself, however often he thought these words, even mumbled them with his fast breath… It was not a charm, that could somehow make his wish come true.
It made no sense… maybe not. But it was reality.
Kakashi had saved him from the ministry holding cell. Kakashi and an accomplice, that Sirius didn't know. Who else would it have been? Who else would even consider helping him? It wasn't like there were all that many people caring about him and his fate.
A fate worse than death.
Kakashi had saved him from that. Why the boy would go so far for a convicted mass murderer he had only just meat, Sirius didn't know. How? Sirius couldn't answer that either. But he had. That was fact. Kakashi had saved him from the dementor's kiss, and Sirius should be thankful.
I crushed his windpipe, I'm sure.
But how could Sirius be thankful, if Kakashi killed his former comrades for him? People Sirius had fought side by side with, in the past? How was Sirius even worth that?
I know war. I don't let my comrades (Friends!) die. Did you kill before?
I will help find rat. The mission isn't complete. Did you kill before? Killing rat.
Sirius shivered where he sat. His memories were merging. Forming an undefinable mess. The image of the boy – a curved eye showing the smile behind the mask, the smell of rosemary and thyme, comforting scratches behind his ears. The image of the killer – the flat affect, I crushed his windpipe, I'm sure.
"He's just a kid," Sirius whispered to himself. "He's fourteen."
I know war.
Decidedly Sirius shook his head. He had to stop. He was getting nowhere. His thoughts were running in circles and he could not find the solution to the puzzle.
Can't you find it? Or do you not want to find it?
He quickly pulled on his still wet clothes, hair still dripping onto his shoulders. Then he turned into Shaggy—Padfoot. He shook himself, the dog's fur now as wet as his body had been. As a dog, he didn't have to concern himself with these thoughts.
A dog's life was simpler. As a dog his first concern was food. Without Kakashi, he had to find that himself. These last days, he had mostly relied on searching through trash. He didn't particularly mind that. Twelve years in Azkaban taught him not to be picky. And really, his only goal was getting to Hogwarts alive. He didn't care much what shape he would be in then as long as he was still able to kill Peter.
Killing rat. Did you kill before?
Merlin, he was still fighting these memories as Padfoot? What was wrong with him? He shook himself one final time, then he made his way north. In the next village, he would find something to eat. Maybe, some time later he could learn how to hunt. Maybe remembering what Kakashi had done, would help him.
He remembered the boy stalking on soundless, light feet. He remembered a hand shooting into the water with minimal splash. Kakashi had been a hunter.
Kakashi was a killer.
A killer all along.
But still, as the dog started moving, he could smell it. Rosemary and thyme.
**
The ministry was a busy place by day. It was also much easier getting into it with an invitation, Kakashi realized, as he stepped out of the visitor's entrance into the Atrium. The Atrium was full of life. People in these odd wizarding robes that Kakashi was only slowly getting used to were appearing in puffs of green flames from the many fireplaces lining the walls. There was a constant coming and going, the buzz of a hundred conversations, and every now and then somebody would be in a hurry and shove past their colleagues to the chagrin of everybody involved.
Kakashi stopped next to the huge fountain that featured golden statues of a wizard, a witch, a half-horse/half-man being, a goblin – he had already seen them in Gringotts – as well as another small humanoid creature with big flappy ears he didn't know. The ceiling of the Atrium was of a beautiful blue with shiny golden ornaments moving over it. The floor was polished so well, that Kakashi could see himself reflected in it. The last time he'd been here he hadn't cared much for the opulent beauty of the place, now it struck him that this wasn't just a place for work and business, it was a place of power and this entrance hall was supposed to inspire awe into everybody who first entered it.
Kakashi didn't feel much for it. Maybe, if they didn't try to throw his friend into a prison that was so horrible, most people would not even talk about it, maybe then he'd be more inclined to acknowledge the architecture. Or maybe it was the fact that they should have invested in better protection rather than this overt splendor. What worth was a big Atrium when he had just proven how easily he could sneak in and out of this place?
Kakashi followed a group of witches and wizards to a registration desk. A short man with a bowler hat and a small mustache sat there, working his way slowly through the onslaught of visitors. Kakashi patiently waited in line.
When it was Kakashi's turn the man barely looked up at him, as he let a golden antenna glide over his body. "Wand, please."
Kakashi handed over a wand.
"What is your business here," he asked looking up at the name tag, Kakashi had clipped to his sweater, "Mr. Major?"
Instead of answering, Kakashi handed over the invitation he had received via owl. "I see, I see." The bowler hat man carried a name tag that was half-hidden under the folds of his robe. His name was Munch. "Thank you."
He handed both the invitation and the wand back to Kakashi. "First Floor," he said before he turned to the next in line.
As Kakashi walked through the ministry, he familiarized himself with his surroundings. He had already spent a night here, but back then he'd been focused on not getting caught. Now, he studied the plan that told him exactly what department was on which floor. He copied it with his Sharingan just in case he needed to come back here again, sometime later.
He arrived in room 304.3G exactly five minutes past eleven. Not willing to push it any further, and already having familiarized himself with the architecture of the building, he knocked at the office door of Miranda Drummer.
Despite believing that Miranda was a woman's name, upon entry, he was greeted by a man's voice.
"One might think, if you really wanted to come to Hogwarts, punctuality would be in order," the man snarled. He had a voice as if he was pressing it through his nose. Very soft, very tight and contained. It was a thin man with pale and sallow skin, greasy black hair, and a hooked nose. His teeth looked almost as bad as Sirius' as he spoke. Kakashi could smell his bad breath up to the door though it wasn't overwhelming. He also smelled a little of the dust from underground cellars or dungeons and of other fumes that Kakashi couldn't quite place. "No excuse?" the man asked with a raised eyebrow, the s-sound whistling through his teeth. Black eyes were boring into Kakashi.
"Are you Miranda Drummer?" Kakashi asked, still a little surprised, because he had never heard the name 'Miranda' before receiving the letter, but he had learned that names ending on the letter A were usually female.
The man sputtered. "How dare you…! Don't be impertinent!" the man threatened. He didn't take Kakashi's question well. In his anger, his already sallow face paled even more.
"I'm sorry," Kakashi pulled out his invitation. "I was supposed to meet a Miranda Drummer here."
"Yes, correct." At that moment an adjoining door opened, and a witch in a mint-colored dress robe stepped into the room. "I'm sorry for the confusion, Mr. Major." She looked at him with a kindly round face. "May I call you Charlie?" Kakashi nodded. "Well, Charlie, it's a pleasure to introduce to you, Professor Severus Snape." She waved towards the man.
Meanwhile, Snape still stood fuming over Kakashi's prior question. Now, he aggressively fixed the sleeves of his shirt and robes and then crossed his arms. He moved slowly and looked down on Kakashi in a way that spoke of haughty disdain. Kakashi did not like this man.
"I see," Kakashi turned away from the professor and back to the witch. "What did you want to talk about?"
Again, Snape seemed to take some affront to his actions, though this time Kakashi could not fathom what the problem was. Did he expect Kakashi to talk to him first and foremost rather than the witch who had actually invited him to the meeting?
"Before we will decide over your enrollment, and," she looked at Snape for a moment, "the exact procedure, I would like you to give us a bit of information about yourself – to clear up some questions."
Kakashi agreed with a shrug and then walked past the professor to sit opposite Ms. Dummer's desk. With a seething huff, Snape sat down as well, though he pushed his chair as far away from Kakashi as he could, without making it too obvious.
"Can you tell me about your parents?"
And so Kakashi told the sad tale of Charlie Major. A boy born on September 15, 1978, as the first-born son to Madelaine and Anthony Major in Johannesburg, South Africa. He spoke of a younger brother called Michael, of his first magical incident setting the curtains in his house on fire, and how his brother had been hurt in the accident. He had the tale all set up and ready.
Speaking with Harry about his aunt and uncle and about his friends and their families, reading up on South Africa, the United Kingdom, and the world in the library, listening to witches and wizards in the Leaky Cauldron, Kakashi had created a tale that was so full of holes, that it would never fly in the shinobi world. If he were to attempt and infiltrate an enemy shinobi village with such a lie, he'd undoubtedly be found out within a week. But this world was different. In this world, fourteen-year-olds were not expected to invent their whole life stories, they were not deemed a threat. In this world, wizards thought muggles to be primitive, so when he told his story about how his disapproving muggle family had wanted to ship him off to a boarding school far away on the countryside, and how he had slipped away on the airport and somehow made it on a plane to London, they thought his story seemed perfectly reasonable. They barely even questioned whether the South African police was looking for him and when he told them, his family wouldn't want him back anyway, they seemed satisfied with grim acceptance.
He had needed a story that would explain why he didn't appear in any registries they had access to. A South African kid who had run from his hateful parents and somehow smuggled himself to London by the age of 11 was surely an odd tale. To them, however, it seemed more plausible than the idea of a magical child slipping through the cracks of their own system.
Kakashi had relied on that. As long as they thought that the mistake laid elsewhere and not within their own ministry, they would be perfectly willing to accept the story with minimal research.
Well, Ms. Drummer would at least. Snape seemed more skeptical. In fact, Kakashi realized a little worried, that this professor might be troublesome.
"I lived in London until four months ago, and then I went to Horley because I hoped I could get a job there," Kakashi ended his wild tale, "in a bakery."
"It didn't work out?" Drummer asked though she seemed completely disinterested in the bakery-thing. Which was good, as it was the biggest hole in his story. "Thank you for telling us, Charlie. That must have been hard. In the name of the ministry and Hogwarts, I apologize that we didn't find you sooner. But I think, now that we have this out of the way, we can talk about how to proceed." She looked at Snape expectantly.
The man snorted. "You can't believe this hogwash of a story, Ms. Drummer?" he snarled in a tone of utter contempt. "Clearly, he is lying. If he weren't, he would be asking us to get back to South Africa, wouldn't he?"
"I think Charlie has explained why he doesn't wish for that. Of course, we will attempt to find his parents in Johannesburg, yet in the meantime, we cannot let a young boy stay without an education." As Snape wanted to retort something, she looked at him strictly. "This is not just in the boy's interest, but also to protect the Statute of Secrecy. It is paramount that Charlie learns to control his magic."
Snape seemed to accept that argument at least. "You misunderstand me, Ms. Drummer," he said in a quietly seething drawl. "I don't wish to deny this boy his education. I simply don't believe he is telling the truth. I may not know much about Afrikaans, but I do know a Dutch accent, and this couldn't be further from that."
"I have a speech impediment," Kakashi explained casually. "I have problems with the L-sound."
Snape glared at him.
"Professor Snape," Drummer started warningly, "we cannot deny him his education based on your suspicion about an accent. Do you have any proof that this boy might not be who he says he is?"
Snape gnawed at his lip. His black eyes were staring at Kakashi, like dark tunnels. He was smart, Kakashi thought. This one he would have to be careful of if he didn't want to be figured out.
"The attack on the ministry," Snape started in a low voice. "A stranger broke in to help Black escape. Auror Gibson almost died in the attempt." Kakashi was shortly distracted by the relieving knowledge that Sirius' friend had lived. According to the last information in the Daily Prophet he had been in intensive care. "A few days before that, there was a sighting of an unknown young wizard, able to perform magic without being detected by the trace through some dark witchery."
"I remember well enough," Drummer said sounding exasperated. "You may have noticed that I work here."
"Of course," Snape nodded with a tight expression on his face. "I believe this boy may be him." Smart, Kakashi thought, though Snape clearly had no proof beyond his own suspicion. Drummer seemed to think the idea was absurd. "If you allow, I can perform a spell that will show any illusions on the boy's exterior. I also have brought a potion with me to counteract the effects of a Polyjuice."
The fact that Snape had brought the potion meant he had his suspicions fixed long before meeting Kakashi. At least, now Kakashi knew it wasn't his story that had made him question Kakashi's identity.
"This seems a little over the top," Drummer frowned.
"Is it?" Snape retorted snidely. "If this is indeed a dark wizard and a companion of Sirius Black, we would risk Harry Potter's safety by sending Charlie to Hogwarts." He spoke the name in a tone as if he didn't believe for a second that it was a real name.
Drummer seemed to understand the argument. Regretfully, she agreed. "Charlie, would you mind us checking your identity? This won't hurt." As she spoke, she looked questioningly to Snape, as if not sure herself about the 'hurting' part.
"It won't" Snape nodded. "Just a few spells to reveal the truth."
Kakashi was a little nervous now. He didn't know how well Transformation or his dyed hair would hold up to this magic. He had a plan in his mind, what to do if it broke any of his disguises, but he didn't really fancy having to explain himself.
He still agreed to the procedure.
First, Snape gave him a disgustingly smelling and even worse tasting potion, but it had no effect whatsoever on Kakashi. Snape frowned unhappily at the lack of reaction. Then he pointed the wand at Kakashi.
Unlike with the minister, this time Kakashi tried very hard, not to pull the wand out of the man's hand, even if it would be easy. He still raised a hand in front of his eyes as if to shield them from an attack.
"Revelio veritas," Snape muttered in the unknown language wizards often used for spells.
Kakashi blinked as a flimsy white light hit him. He didn't feel anything. But as he quickly checked himself over, he realized that although the hair dye and the contacts and the makeup were still there, his Transformation was gone. Still, with his hand in front of his face, he could quickly reapply the partial Transformation without anybody noticing.
Another worrying thing, he learned. Wizards could break through his illusions. However, it also meant there was a sort of interaction between his use of jutsu and their magic. Which meant he might have to explore how exactly he could manipulate magic with his own techniques. If their magic could affect his jutsu, it was possible that it would work the other way around as well.
"I think that is enough," Drummer said a little red in the face.
Snape looked as if he had bitten into something sour. "I apologize," he gritted out through clenched teeth, looking like he'd rather vomit out his breakfast than admit a mistake.
"No problem," Kakashi reassured them as he looked back up at the two, Transformation already reapplied. "I've read about Black."
But they didn't seem eager to reveal any information about Sirius. Although, maybe they had forgotten, that they had already given him a vital piece of information. They thought Harry was Sirius' target. Which was good, because obviously they were wrong, and any wrong information the ministry had would be good for Sirius. On the other hand, though, Harry would go to Hogwarts, where Sirius was going too, to catch the rat. So, lucky fools that they were here in the ministry, they protected the wrong target, but they'd conveniently still be in the right place to catch Sirius by accident.
Now Kakashi knew for a fact, that he had to go to Hogwarts. That was where he was needed. Whether Sirius wanted his protection or not. He wouldn't let them throw a friend back into this hellish prison everybody spoke about.
"Yes," Snape said in a sour tone. He sat back in his chair looking embarrassed.
Drummer coughed slightly. "Prof. Snape is here to ask you a few questions regarding your current know-how. So, we can create a school curriculum for you, that would be best suited. At your age, you would normally now start your fourth year in Hogwarts, however, there are concerns that the curriculum might be overwhelming for you. That would also mean that two years from now, you'd have to write your first big exams. Your OWLs."
Kakashi nodded, although he had no interest staying for two years to write any sort of exams. As he couldn't even use magic, he doubted the difficulty of the classes would at all matter to him. Thankfully, wizards seemed to largely accept his jutsu as magic – if maybe a for them slightly odd and unknown form of magic. He hoped he could fake most of his tasks.
"Professor, would you like to take over?"
Kakashi could hear the other man breathe. He still seemed angry from either Kakashi calling him Miranda or his failed attempt to expose Kakashi as a dark wizard. Eventually, he gave a short huff.
"Certainly," he hissed the word from between tight lips. "Mr. Major, I have here a written questionnaire regarding your theoretical knowledge of magic. This test was painstakingly created by the teachers of the main subjects," he spoke as if he thought his colleagues had gone through too much of an effort for just one kid. "After that I will ask you to perform certain spells and magic, to ascertain your current level."
He pushed a long scroll of parchment in front of Kakashi. Drummer gave him ink and a quill.
"You have 60 minutes," Snape said without further preparation, looking at an hourglass that he pulled from his pocket.
It wouldn't have mattered if he had only 10 minutes, Kakashi quickly realized as he read the myriad of questions. The parchment was neatly separated into six sections, named 'General Wizarding Knowledge', 'Herbology', 'History of Magic', 'Potions', 'Astrology', and 'Theory of Magic'.
He found four questions in the category 'General Wizarding Knowledge' that he could answer remembering what Sirius had told him about the magical world. There were two questions in History of Magic that seemed familiar to him, and one question each in the Potions and Herbology section that he could answer based on his general (non-magical) knowledge on poisons. Astrology was the most surprising part of the test to him.
Kakashi knew to read the stars. Lost in enemy territory without equipment, it was often the only means of orientation. Traveling through England, the sky had always looked like that of his homeworld. It looked different, of course, but the differences could be chalked up to the geographical distance and were not necessarily proof that he had traveled to a different world altogether. The year had the same number of days, the days were the same 24 hours long, and there was only one moon. Even the lunar calendar was the same.
Now, he found out that it wasn't only similar… their night's sky seemed identical. It didn't make answering the questions easier for Kakashi, as he didn't know the English names for all these celestial bodies, but at least he could answer certain questions regarding the earth and lunar orbit. He also felt quite proud at being able to draw up an accurate lunar calendar. The rest of the questions about astrology were weird things about reading zodiac signs and the magical effect of different positions of the moon. It all sounded like nonsense to Kakashi.
Only fifteen minutes after he was handed the test, he said that he was finished. He let go of the end of the scroll. The stiff parchment rolled itself up all on its own. Like a spring that was drawn apart and as he let go of the end, it snapped back together. It had done that all the time as he went over the question. Every time, he lifted his elbow off the end, the parchment had rolled up a little. It was quite annoying. Kakashi found his own paper scrolls much more convenient and wondered why wizards didn't just use paper.
"Already?" Snape asked through his nose.
"I don't know most of this," Kakashi replied aware of the haughty smirk on the teacher's face.
"I can see that. Well, maybe your wand work will be better."
He spoke in a mocking tone. As he told his story, Kakashi had also mentioned that he only bought his wand a few days ago, so clearly Snape had all reason to assume that Kakashi would humiliate himself.
"Your wand, boy," Snape waved impatiently until Kakashi had his wand out and raised. "First, a Wingardium Leviosa?" The words sounded were meaningless to Kakashi. Snape waited expectantly, but Kakashi had no idea what he was supposed to do.
"Maybe you should offer an example," Drummer said with a kind smile towards Kakashi.
Snape gritted his teeth. "The boy is hopeless if he doesn't even know that much. One would think, he could have at least read a beginners' coursebook on charms in preparation for this meeting." But then he quickly jerked his wand out of his robes and made a quick swish-and-flick movement. "Wingardium Leviosa." A small post-it note on Drummer's deck flew up into the air where it hung for a moment before Snape canceled the spell again. He turned back to Kakashi with a raised eyebrow.
As Kakashi watched the post-it-note slowly flap back down, he prepared his strategy. He had seen Suna shinobi use their puppetry jutsu often enough, that he had at least understood the concept behind it. He couldn't control a complex puppet, but he felt confident that he could let a piece of paper fly using an invisible chakra string.
"Wingardium Leviosa." The paper shot into the air, remained there for a moment before Kakashi let it fall again.
Snape furrowed his brows looking at him. "It's WinGARdium," he corrected, clearly taking issue with Kakashi's pronunciation. It seemed redundant to Kakashi as he had clearly fulfilled the task. Was the correct pronunciation important?
"Now an Incendio." He waved his wand in a lazy demonstration creating a small puff of flames.
That was easy enough for Kakashi to mimic. He was asked to perform a few other tasks, though soon, Kakashi didn't follow anymore. With two pairs of eyes fixed on him, he knew they would notice if the jutsu was too different from the demanded spell. He could, for example, get the same result he needed for a knockback curse with a small wind or earth jutsu, but surely, they wouldn't miss a sudden burst of wind. So, he felt much safer just failing most of the tasks.
Snape was pinching his nose when Kakashi failed an Expelliarmus spell at last. "First grade," Snape snapped at him and he looked as if he wanted to take Kakashi's wand, rip it in half and not let him go to the school at all. "The boy has so little talent, even the first graders would show him off."
"Professor!" Drummer exclaimed scandalized. "I was guaranteed by Professor Dumbledore himself, that Charlie will enjoy the best education and care Hogwarts can provide. But he's also a fourteen-year-old boy. Surely, he will do better with his peers."
Snape shook his head unhappily. His lips pressed together tightly as if constipated. Then he huffed, his face loosening up in resignation. "The boy will not survive the fourth year. I can guarantee you that. But – though I strongly advised against this – Professor Dumbledore asked for Mr. Major to be put in third grade if necessary."
"A splendid idea," Drummer clapped. "That way, although he may have to attend supplementary classes to catch up on the old subject matters, at least for the elective courses he can start with his classmates." She looked at Charlie. "How does that sound, Charlie? You would only be a year older than your classmates. If it doesn't work out, I fear we'll have to push you back into grade two after all, but we could at least give it a try."
Kakashi nodded. He remembered that Harry would start his third year too. It was actually perfect, though he bristled a little at the idea that he might not be able to keep up with some thirteen-year-old children. He had after all finished the academy at age 5, seven years younger than the average graduate.
"Splendid," Drummer said again. "Let's get to the sorting. Professor Dumbledore told me you would bring the hat? He and I agreed that in this particular case, we should spare the boy the entrance ceremony." She looked at Kakashi pityingly as if said entrance ceremony was a great event that nobody should have to miss. "Normally," she started to explain unprompted, "the sorting is something every new student looks forward to. But I doubt you want to join a group of eleven-year-olds on their march to Hogwarts and be sorted in front of the whole school with children much younger than yourself."
Kakashi grimaced. It wasn't so much the part where he had to be with a group of young children, but more so the prospect of having to do something in front of the entire school, that spooked him off. Kakashi didn't like attention on himself. Especially not in this case. Who knew what this 'sorting' entailed? He might out himself as 'non-magical' after all, and if so, he'd rather not do it in front of everybody.
"I have brought the hat." Snape agreed. He grabbed a bag from next to the desk and pulled out a leathery something. As he unfurled it, it turned out to be… well, an old pointy hat.
Notes:
Those of you who were looking forward to more Kakashi trolling the magical world. I hope this satisfied you. I'm not a big snape fan, but I tried not to bash his character. He's unpleasant to children, and Kakashi is no exception. I like to imagine that Snape is really miffed at the fact that 'Charlie' managed quite a few spells while completely butchering the pronunciation. He's a bit weirded out by that? Is the kid so untalented that he can't do a simple knockback-curse, but at the samet time so skilled that pronuniation doesn't metter to him? Fun. Of course, I was thinking about the 'Wingardium LevioSA' scene with Ron and Hermione in the first book/movie. I bet Hermione will be equally miffed as Snape, when Kakashi can succeed at his spellwork without proper pronunciation.
I like to imagine that Snape has found his match in Kakashi. He's a bully to most of his students, but Kakashi won't take it that easily. The kid's seen worse than a bullying bat.
Sirius scenes always kill me... Whenever I write him if only for a few hundred words he's more and more miserable. He's truly alone now...He's also slowly pieceing together the truth about Kakashi, I think. He'll need a bit longer. After all Kakashi can't help him now and he has other things on his mind too, plus he doesn't really WANT to solve the puzzle quite yet, terrified that Kakashi and fake-Kakahi would end up being the same person....Also...Assuming the kid came from a different dimension with child soldier shinobi is maybe a bit far-fetched for him still...But babysteps... I feel really bad for putting Sirius so much on the back seat now. As long as he's alone there's just not that much to do with him....
I have in the past talked about KAkashi's house before so...some of you will probably know already, but what do you think his house would be?
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