Chapter 12: chapter 12
Chapter 12 – Nightmare
"While I doubt anything will happen, please try to stay up, okay? And don't answer the door unless you know it's Ichigo or Miyako."
"Mou! I know that already! I'm not stupid!"
I give her a deadpan stare.
She may be a genius of an idol and a great actress, but I saw her stumble over her words when Ruby asked about basic multiplication.
"D-Don't look at me like that! And you better explain everything when you come back!"
"I will, don't worry."
Not seeing the kids around, I step towards her and plant a soft kiss on her lips.
"Be safe, Ai."
"I should be saying that to you."
Giving her a nod, I pull out the two weapons I would be using for this, umm... 'operation'.
A pitch black kodachi, sharp to the touch.
A wooden bastard sword, the dulled edges slightly frayed from time.
But it wasn't the swords themselves that I was using, but rather, the effects.
The Sword of Silence, which nullified the sound of the wielder.
Another weapon that was 'gifted' to me by the intelligence department.
In fact, they were probably searching for this thing to this day.
The thought puts a smile on my face.
And Night's Ballad, which made the wielder invisible.
Unfortunately, this one was quite useless back in Aspia, due to most fighters being able to sense people's mana, which this thing could not hide.
But for here? On Earth?
It was perfect.
The moonlight shining overhead, I leap into the night, tracking the blood I had left on Hikaru.
Although I had to cross the city, with me being invisible, there was no need to hold back.
Solar magic coursing through my body, it doesn't take long to reach him as I leap from rooftop to rooftop.
Finally arriving at my destination, I jump through the open window of his apartment, looking around the fairly clean kitchen and living room.
Luckily, the guy seemed to be living alone, so I won't have any complications on that front.
Walking down the small hallway, I hear a somewhat familiar voice.
"-Now why did that guy kill himself? I thought he would do that only after he killed Ai, but obviously, that wasn't the case."
Well, if I didn't know it was him before, I sure as shit do now.
Returning Night's Ballad to my inventory, I open the door.
I'd like the guy to see my face before I kill him, to give him a hint of the fear Ai felt, that her kids felt.
"Yo."
Hikaru instantly looks over, confusion quickly turning into shock as he stumbles out of his chair.
Looking at his corner desk, I see the bare wall next to it is covered in photos of Ai in her everyday life.
Creepy...
"W-Who are you?"
"Your worst nightmare."
"W-Why are you here? I-I'll call the police!"
And you think I would let you do that?
"You tried to kill Ai."
Suddenly, his blank face transforms into a charming smile.
"A-Ah, I see. You must be a fan. You know that she's just a liar, right? She's never loved you and never will. She's impure and a manipulat-"
"Don't care."
Before Hikaru could continue, I slashed forward with solar magic enhancing my sword, sending his head toppling to the ground.
It seems he had the wrong impression of me being a deranged fan and tried to manipulate me into being another pawn of his like Ryousuke.
So it's not like it would change anything even if I let him keep talking.
But it was finally over, huh?
No more worrying about stalkers or fans-turned-hitmen anymore.
I could just enjoy a calm, average life with my girlfriend and her kids.
...As calm and average of a life one can get while dating an idol, that is.
"Now... electrical fires aren't that uncommon, are they?"
Solar magic flaring at my fingertips, I set alight both his body and the entire room before pulling out Night's Ballad once again.
"Well, I think it's time I take my leave."
The fire alarm going off and the blaze growing behind me, I make my way toward the open window to head back to Ai.
Back to home.
----- Ai POV -----
Resting on the couch, I fiddle with the dulled knife Cassius had given me while thinking of the enigma that is my new boyfriend.
Ha! Hear that Cassius?
I used the word 'enigma'!
Told you I wasn't stupid!
Anyways... he had secrets.
A lot of them.
And I could only hope that he would keep his promise and tell me them once he got back.
Then again... I should reciprocate with my own truths before demanding anything.
My loveless past, my desperate search, why I had worn my facade...
Everything.
Putting so much trust into someone is definitely scary, but for some reason when I remember it's Cassius, that fear fades away, if only slightly.
And to think, it was only a little over a week ago when he came into my life.
Haa... you definitely fell quite hard for him, didn't you, Ai?
But I don't mind.
I know what love is now, so something as trivial as 'going too fast' won't stop me from pursuing it.
Plus my babies finally have another parent to watch over them!
...assuming Cassius doesn't mind.
No, he wouldn't, right?
He's already watched over them a couple of times, what would-
"I'm back."
"Hyaa!"
Jumping up with a start, I'm caught by the firm arms of the man that has been plaguing my mind.
"That was a cute scream."
Damn you and that handsome smile of yours!
"Don't scare me like that, Cassius!"
Taking a few deep breaths, I calm my rapidly beating heart as Cassius makes his swords disappear.
I definitely need to ask how he does that.
"Sorry, forgot I was still holding that. Anyways, everything's done."
"Done?"
"Hikaru won't be trying to kill you anymore."
While I wasn't book smart, I could pick up on social queues well enough to know what he meant.
My ex, Hikaru Kamiki, was dead.
It was a bit... scary, how little I cared.
Does this make me inhuman?
Would Cassius think of me as a coldhearted woman and leave me?
No... he was the one to do the deed, and I still love him just as much, if not more.
So who cares!
Hikaru tried to take me away from my babies, from my happiness, and he got what he deserved.
Besides, there might have been others he had his hand in hurting.
Others who didn't have a Cassius to save them like I did.
"So... will you be going back to your place?"
Although I didn't want him to leave, staying on the couch must be uncomfortable.
But then again, he could always join me on the bed~
"I'd like to stay for your week off. He might have sent someone else in the time he had and I'd rather not risk anything. If you don't mind of course."
"Nope! Not at all!"
Not. At. All.
Sitting down, I pull on Cassius' hand to sit down next to me.
"Now. I hope that you intend to keep your promise."
"Of course. Are the kids in bed?"
"Yep! But actually... I think it'd be better if I told you all about me first."
Feeling my voice tremble from my unease-
No, unease wasn't quite right.
It was terror.
The memories of all the pain I went through as my true self come flooding in.
While I had decided to not use my facade in front of my family anymore, and I had already shown my genuine self to Cassius a bunch of times, I had still yet to talk about something so... personal while doing so.
The feeling of vulnerability made me tremble.
Suddenly, I feel a warmth around my hand, causing me to look up and see Cassius with a kind expression.
An expression radiating love and care.
"Ai. It's all right. While I don't know you're history, I love you. The genuine you. So don't be scared."
Right.
He... already loves me, even with my real self.
The real self that made my mother hate me.
And the real self that helped me discover love.
"Y-Yeah. Sorry, Cassius."
What is there to be scared about?
It's just Cassius.
The kind, caring, warm man I've fallen in love with.
Alright!
Ai Hoshino is gonna talk about her trauma!
"I was born to an abusive mother, mostly emotionally abusive, and grew up without a father."
Taking a shaky breath, I muster my courage and continue.
"Eventually, she was arrested and I was sent to an orphanage, and a year later when she was released... she never came to retrieve me."
Yes.
I never knew love.
But you changed that, didn't you Cassius?
You and my sweet babies.
"I was lost, you know. So lost. I didn't know what I wanted to do in my life. That was until I met the president. He asked me to be an idol, and of course, I thought that was stupid. I mean, not even my own mother loved me, why would anyone else? I didn't even know what love felt like, how could I say it to my fans?"
It was a tough journey, to get where I am.
Filled with mistakes and hurdles.
But I got here.
And I'm forever thankful for it.
"But he told me that lying was fine. In fact, it was a desirable trait for an idol. And then, well, my motivation was born. To find love. If I refined my lies... honed them so well that they blended into reality, it would eventually be the truth."
A desperate hope.
I can't help but laugh at how stupid of a girl I was.
But then again, I was eventually able to truly say 'I love you', so was it really wrong?
"And then... I met Hikaru. It was the first time I felt 'attraction', and while I know it was a surface-level attraction now, at that point, I thought it was love. Or something close to it."
Such a silly girl.
Giving my first to Hikaru was both the worst and best decision I ever made.
Worst because, well, the one who took my virginity also tried to kill me.
And best, because I was able to have my babies.
"We only dated for a week, and with the feeling of attraction not growing, I thought that if we went all the way it would create love, or at least bring me closer to it. As you could guess, it didn't. After finding out that path was going nowhere, we broke up."
Well, I broke up with him.
Maybe that's why he wanted to kill me?
Who knows~
"And then, I found out I was pregnant. It was... scary, at first. But then I realized that it was the greatest chance to find love. Mothers are meant to love their children naturally, right?"
But that obvious fact was also the shackle that kept me from showing my true self to them.
After all, if my true self couldn't love her children... what kind of monster was I?
"I also thought it would tell me why... Why my mother abandoned me like she did."
My eyes involuntarily become watery.
Oh, this raging pressure in my chest.
This... is sadness, no?
It's been so long...
I don't like it.
"C-Cassius!"
Help me!
Save me!
"W-Why!? Why didn't Mommy love me!?"
Before the tightness in my chest becomes unbearable, I feel my body being pulled toward Cassius' chest.
Ah, this warmth.
Like a blanket on the coldest of nights.
Even that simple action already made me feel so good.
I didn't even need to think about what had calmed me, because I knew instinctively that it was love.
Something so simple, so beautiful...
That makes me wonder even more, why didn't Mommy want to feel this?
I thought it was me.
That I was simply unlovable and incapable of loving.
But now that I know it's not the case, why!?
"Shh, shh, it's okay, Ai. Just let it out."
And with those gentle words, I release the dam of emotions that I had been holding back.
Unleashing all my sadness, my confusion, and my desperation into Cassius' chest as he slowly rubbed my back.
An unknown amount of time later, I could finally stop crying.
That felt... good.
Really good.
Like a tension that had been building throughout my entire life was finally released.
"Ai, sometimes... people are just bad parents."
Hearing Cassius' words, I look up at his face, his eyes softly staring back at me.
"It could just be genetics, something going on in their life, hate of their partner... many things. But the most common is probably having a poor childhood themselves."
He then softly holds my chin, pulling my face up until our eyes are level.
"That's why I respect you so much as a mother. You did the most important thing you could do. Lies or not, you gave Aqua and Ruby a wonderful home and beautiful childhood. You broke the cycle, Ai. The cycle of hate and pain that many fall into."
I feel the wetness returning to my eyes.
But this time not out of sadness, but rather happiness.
Overflowing happiness.
"You're a wonderful mother, Ai. And all that pain of your past, you can leave it behind. Because your children love you. I love you."
Ah.
I'm definitely crying now.
How could you, Cassius?
Men aren't supposed to make their girlfriends cry, you know?
"So let's make happy memories from now on. Enough to wash away all the sadness of your past. Together, alright?"
"Mm!"
For some reason, I don't want him to see my face right now, hence I bury my face back into his chest.
Yeah.
With my babies and Cassius, I'll make happy memories.
More than enough for a lifetime.
But for now, I just want to be held by his loving arms.
"Huam~"
Ah, I'm getting sleepy.
"Don't move me, Cassius~"
I don't want to leave this spot.
Good thing I brushed my teeth already.
"Goodnight~"
"Haa, didn't you want to ask about me? Whatever. Goodnight, Ai."
Suddenly, I feel his weight shift as his breath brushes across my skin.
"My love."
An electric jolt running through my spine... doesn't happen.
Instead, I just feel happy.
Like a second pair of Cassius' arms had wrapped themselves protectively around me.
Yeah, I didn't need my mother.
Just these pleasant feelings with my current family are enough.
Enough to last me for a lifetime.
Weekly Power Status
-- Power
Ranking 
-- Power
stone