Chapter 15: Old News

Demyan

It had been a day since the ball and I was stuck in the whirlwall of wanting to go about my schedule like how I planned for the month or just choosing to stay locked up in the mansion for a few days and deal with everything later.

Even though I wanted to pretend like the dance between Ethan and I had never happened, it lived in my mind rent free for the entire night. I was sleep deprived because instead of ignoring a problem that had been bothering me since I was twenty, I spent the whole night once again letting it eat me up inside that halfway through I just sat outside by the balcony.

I was lucky Dad and Pa had noticed Ethan and I danced but simply thought we were just having a good time. I was not sure if they were just saying that to prevent me from stressing about it anymore than I already was because they knew I overthought a lot.

You would think after all these years I would finally learn how to conquer my thoughts that often ran wild with me but it seemed they were doing a better job at evolving than I did. Plus it was hard to ignore my chaotic feelings for Ethan when I was stuck in the room we spent so much time in.

Even though I had taken out every picture, teddies and whatever other gifts he had gotten for me throughout the years, it still felt like he would just randomly walk into the bedroom with his collection of juice boxes and very roughly throw himself on the bed as we got ready to spent the night watching movies on his laptop.

Malia had spent a few nights here as well but I preferred to keep her away from the very room my ex had been in just out of respect for her. I was lucky I had a girlfriend who was as understanding as her because I knew if it was anyone else, they would have probably forbid me from being in the same room as Ethan with our past.

"I saw the picture," she smiled as she wiggled her eyebrows through the screen of my phone as we video called the next morning, "Of you and Ethan."

"Oh no, don't tell me you're jealous," I laughed as I brushed my curls in the bathroom; whilst my phone was balanced on a small stand, then raked a hair mousse to keep my hair moisturised throughout the day.

She let out a cute snort before she rolled her eyes, "That's old news. Plus you two seemed to be in two different parts of the universe even though you were next to each other."

I shrugged as I let out a sigh. The great thing about Malia and I we were best friends before we started dating therefore a topic such an one's ex never frightened any of us. "I was there for Dad and the family mostly."

"Ethan is family too Dem. You have to remember that."

"I know," I gave her a small smile, "I just think I was a bit overwhelmed by everything. Plus it's different knowing he was my boyfriend before."

She nodded as she hummed, "Well I think you were very mature to show up and I'm sure it meant a lot to your fathers. Plus I'm sure after your last conversation with Ethan a few months ago he has probably given up."

My stomach flipped slightly when I thought about our dance. Even though I felt like I did nothing wrong by dancing with Ethan, I also still felt it would not be the wisest choice to tell Malia, Ethan had not given up. I just felt like it was something I could handle on my own and the last thing I wanted was for her to be upset whilst she was pregnant.

"I think it has," I smiled, "He's probably wrapped up around someone new."

"And the news of the baby must have discouraged him," she agreed.

The other thing about that was that no one but the direct Chernyshevsky-Coleman family knew about Malia's pregnancy because I asked them to keep it that way for now. I was not sure why I had done it. Maybe because I did not want Ethan to find out through word of mouth.

I still felt like I owed it to him to tell him myself because there was a point where I genuinely thought I would be having children with him and no one else. At first I hoped when I came to London maybe he had truly moved on and that would make it easier for me to tell him, but after last night I knew how much it complicated things.

"I think it has," I smiled as I lied to her for the second time in a few minutes. It had probably been the most I had lied to Malia in such a short time frame since I had met her, but I truly believed a little white lie would not hurt. As long as I did not cause her any unnecessary stress I would do anything in my power.

"Will you be available for the first ultrasound in two weeks?" she beamed as she then pointed the camera to the full body mirror that showed off her still extremely flat stomach.

"I will be, it's huge on my calendar I wouldn't miss it for the world," I sent her a kiss through the screen which she blushed too before sending me one back. "I love you very much Malia."

"I love you Dem, I'll call you tonight again."

"Okay babe," I winked, which made her shriek in laughter before we finally said goodbye to each other.

Once the call had finally ended I looked at my reflection in the mirror with absolute confusion. How in the world was I going to sort all of this out before Malia arrived in two months?

Just as the thought crossed my mind, a ding from my phone caught my attention as I saw a message from a number I had not contacted in a very long time.

It was from Ethan.

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