Chapter 180: Natsuki's visit (2)
Natsuki: hey can I tell you a secret?
Yuuka: a secret?
Natsuki: yup! Only a few people know about it so don't tell anyone.
Yuuka: okay? But what does that have to do with me having a bit of similarities to Kaneki?
Natsuki: I'll tell my secret first, I'm an ability user.
Yuuka's thoughts*
(I already know about this)
Yuuka: really?
Natsuki: yup, I have to ability to see someone's true color, views, motives and soul.
Yuuka: that seems very useful huh?
Natsuki: ... Not really, seeing everyones colors and soul is honestly very depressing.
Yuuka: depressing?
Natsuki: yeah, seeing how others view you and their motives and I guess a bit of their feelings towards you would make you feel depressed and lonely right?
Yuuka: I guess so?
Natsuki: but you know my ability was the reason why I actually became friends with Kaneki-kun.
(I already know this too)
Yuuka: really? What kind of color did Kaneki had?
Natsuki: I would be lying but his colors actually change quite frequently.
Yuuka: What?
(I didn't know this!)
Natsuki: yeah. I don't think I can explain how his colors changed. But I could say he was very angry, sad and most of all afraid.
Yuuka: what do you mean by afraid?
Natsuki: you know how he didn't trust you at first yesterday?
Yuuka: no?
Natsuki: well... That's because you somehow reminded him of someone, someone he used to care about.
(Wait she's talking about)
Natsuki: Miyu-chan. The reason why we're doing research to find the Crown. And one of the 3 girls who estranged him.
As Natsuki said that she made a face filled with anger.
Yuuka: Natsuki?
Yuuka was a bit scared.
Natsuki: I... Don't get it.
Yuuka: what?
Natsuki: I don't get how could they hurt him?
Yuuka: Natsuki...
Natsuki: his colors showed he was lonely, afraid and suffering. Even though many people in school think he's violent and is willing to hurt anyone for power they don't know the "real" Kaneki-kun.
Yuuka: ...
Natsuki: I know he is a good boy inside after all he did saved us and help some other people outside of school.
Yuuka: outside of school?
Natsuki: yeah... The day when we became friends in that cat cafe after both of us part ways a kid came up to me.
Yuuka: wait a kid?
Natsuki: yeah, The kid and I talked for a bit but also she told me "That Onii-chan there helped me when I was lost".
(He helped a kid?!)
Natsuki: if I would guess he didn't want to see anyone sad like him. When I told him about my struggles and he listened and he accepted me as his friend.
Yuuka: really?
Natsuki: yeah, you wanna know what similarity you have to with him?
Yuuka: what is it?
Natsuki: you both are afraid of being hurt, abandoned and forgotten by your loved ones.
Yuuka was saddened hearing that.
Natsuki: and also.
Yuuka: also?
Natsuki: you two care for each other.
Yuuka was shocked hearing that.
Natsuki: you are afraid of hurting him yes?
Yuuka nodded.
Natsuki: you know in the camping trip before Kaneki-kun got Demonitis he was panicking because he didn't want to become friends with Shino-san.
(What is she talking about?)
Yuuka: what do you mean?
Natsuki got off the bed and said.
Natsuki: he didn't want to cause Shino-san and you any problems. Because he didn't want anyone in school think any of you as someone who is trying to use him for your own benefit.
Yuuka: wait is it because-
Natsuki: yup, he first thought about how everyone would view you two so he didn't want to do it. Even though Shino-san reminded him of Shita-chan.
Yuuka: he thought about us first?
Natsuki: yup, just goes to show why he is afraid of having friends that being the one who causes problems for them.
Yuuka: I see, but why are you talking about him?
Natsuki: well the reason why you're crying right now is because it has to do something with him right?
Yuuka: what?! No way! You got it all wr-
Doki!
Yuuka: oh yeah... You're right... It has something to do with him.
Yuuka remembered.
Natsuki: really! In that case tell me!
Yuuka: fine but be prepared.
Natsuki: don't worry I'm prepared!
Yuuka: alright the what happened was-
She told Natsuki about her nightmare and how Kaneki was devoured.
Natsuki: !!!!
Yuuka: Natsuki?
Natsuki: I WAS NOT PREPARED FOR THAT!
Yuuka: what did you expect?
Natsuki: that you like him like m- forget that!
Yuuka: sigh~ I'm honestly worried about his wellbeing, only a week ago he had Demonitis then he had to fight those monsters and yesterday he had to fight a bear that almost costed his arm.
Natsuki: I see, you're worried. Well I guess it can't be helped.
Yuuka: yeah...
Natsuki: but maybe we should clear our mind.
Yuuka: how exactly?
Natsuki: what else? We cook!
Yuuka: ... I guess that could help. Yeah let's go cooking after all I have to teach you how to cook
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