Chapter 39: Chapter 38
"The town's being quarantined?" Kit repeats dumbly.
Baz frowns. "According to who?"
"The Department of Health and Public Hygiene."
"They sent the DHPH?!" both Baz and Kit exclaim.
"What is wrong with them?!" Baz seems almost outraged.
For such an important government agency to have made their way here, the higher-ups must really be scrambling to cover this whole matter up from the rest of the world.
"Well, not the DHPH like the whole department," Kat tries to joke, but it falls flat. She clears her throat. "But they apparently sent someone over." The way she says it makes one think that it must be someone important. "I should really get going," Kat says, already walking away. "From the sound of things, this could end up being really ugly." She gives one last wave before she starts running again.
Baz extends his hand. "Wait–!" But before the word has even finished leaving his lips, Kat has already disappeared from their sight, the fog swallowing up her figure.
"Argh, damnit!" Baz says. "Well there must be more information at the office. So," he turns to Kit, "shall we continue?"
Wordlessly, Kit follows Baz and they continue walking in silence as before.
Eventually, the sounds of the crowd ceased; they had left them behind. The office was not in a particularly busy section, so it would make sense that the closer they got to it, the less noise there would be. (Or at least, Kit hopes that they are heading towards the office.) It was now just the two of them. Thinking about this, Kit sees a chance to finally talk to Baz. But how to start? Should he just bring up the topic like that? Wasn't that a bit too blunt? But asking how he was should be fine, no?
Gathering all his courage, Kit opens his mouth. "Baz… You…"
"Hm?" Baz glances back at him. "What is it?"
"No, no. Nevermind." Getting cold feet, he tries to write it off. "I forgot what I was going to say…"
"...Alright."
Kit berates himself internally. Why couldn't he ask such a simple question? But the thought of having to open up to someone else like that; being so vulnerable, made him hesitate. Why is it that he finds it so hard to bare his heart to others?
He should have made a bigger effort. It was just Baz, he tells himself. It shouldn't be hard. He knew Baz. Yet, precisely because it was Baz that he found himself being more nervous. Try as he might, he couldn't, he can't bring himself to show Baz how he feels. Not even the slightest hint of it.
And so they keep on walking. Neither saying a word. Baz too caught up in his own thoughts, and Kit too scared to say anything. They don't hold hands again.
~~~
By some sort of miracle, they make it to the office. Aster is outside, leaning against the wall and smoking, the puffs of smoke mixing with the fog.
As soon as they see xem, Baz exclaims, "Aster! How could you?! Abandoning us not even halfway, did you want us to die?!" Getting no response from Aster, this only serves to rile up Baz more. "Hey, hey, I'm talking to you! Are you ignoring me? Are you really going to be like this? What is wrong with you today? Kit, Kit, help me out here."
Not wanting to get involved, Kit walks past them, into the office.
"You too, Kit? You're going to ignore me too?" Kit can hear Baz yelling after him. "You're both horrible, I hope you know that."
"Argh! Just shut up, will you!" Aster has finally had enough. "Do you really have to make such a big deal out of everything all the time?"
"Big deal?" Baz's response comes after a beat. "You think I'm making a big deal out of this? And just who do you think you are to be lecturing me?"
Kit doesn't get to hear Aster's response, the door closing behind him. Still the sound of their arguing travels to him, and even if he can't make out the words anymore, Kit knows they're still yelling at each other.
Inside, the office is dark, none of the lights have been turned on. The glass separating the reception area from the main office space has been completely shattered, the glass shards crunching under Kit's feet. The cubicles' walls have all been overturned, papers scattered everywhere and even a chair is lying right in the middle of the floor. Like this, one could almost imagine this place being an abandoned building.
But at least he can breathe again. The fog doesn't seem to have gotten inside, and finally, Kit can feel his lungs clearing up with each breath of "fresh" air he takes.
But it's cold. Too cold. It sends a shiver down Kit's spine. Is this what going into a haunted place feels like? But this place is not haunted. Yet there is an aura of… bleakness.
And with no one in the office, Kit is at a loss on what to do. Cleaning up seems a bit pathetic. And as for catching up with work… The idea of simply doing paperwork makes Kit want to laugh. Right now, the last thing he could care about is filing some report.
It's all so pointless… Kit thinks as he takes a seat behind his desk. The chair creaks underneath him, the sound amplified several times in the otherwise silent room. Outside, Baz and Aster are still arguing, their voices only faintly carrying over.
So pointless…
Here he is, standing in a dark room, surrounded by a total mess, powerless to do anything. The futility of it all has never weighed so heavily on him. Everything they had done up until now, it would mean nothing.
And it frustrates him. Not being able to do anything, the powerlessness he feels… It's worse than being faced with the end. Waiting for it to come, just watching the hands on the clock maddeningly tick hour after hour, minute after minute, second after second… There had to be something better to do than that. If this was all he could do, he was sure he would go mad. Maybe he was already going mad, had been since the beginning. It certainly felt like it, the way his thoughts were spiralling out of control.
Just like an agonising person would have their entire life flash before their eyes, at this moment, Kit's entire life comes to his mind with a clarity that is almost blinding. Everything, his dreams, his failures and everything in between, they're all there, forgiving nothing, and now he knows that the saying 'hindsight is 20/20' really is true.
All these years, what had they amounted to? For a long time now, the feeling that he had been wasting his life had been creeping up on him. But now, this feeling is slowly taking a life of its own, and the realisation is upon him before he can catch his breath. He would die, having achieved nothing in his entire life. All these years: wasted. Never able to do anything, not even able to save himself; he really was a failure.
How he wishes he could be anyone else…
But the power to change his fate is no more within his grasp than he is any closer to fixing any of this mess.
He rests his forehead against the desk, the cool metal against his skin grounding in a strange way.
In this position, all the exhaustion from yesterday finally catches up with him, and he feels his eyes growing heavy with sleep. Soon, his eyes are closing and he drifts off into dreams.
His dreams are filled with grotesque imagery, corpses that don't seem to stay dead, and screams that are like those direct from the underworld. He's surrounded, bloody, deformed hands grabbing his legs, pulling him down with them. Soon, he is falling. Falling into a suffocating darkness.
"Kit." Someone is calling his name. "Kit. Wake up."
Jolting awake, he sees the Director standing over him.
"Get up. You're coming with me," she kicks the leg of his chair, and he falls on his ass to the floor. But the Director doesn't even spare him a backward glance, just walks away. "Hurry up."
"W-what?" Still half-asleep, his brain is having trouble processing the Director's words. "Coming with you…? Going where?" Kit scrambles off the floor and hurries to catch up to Fluorite, who is already halfway out the door.
"You're not allowed to ask questions until afterwards," she answers curtly. Clearly something has her in a bad mood. In a worse mood than normal.
It is not without a vague sense of unease that Kit gets into the passenger's seat of the Director's car. He also can't help but notice that all traces of Aster and Baz are gone; they're no longer by the entrance and they weren't inside the office either. Where they are or where they could have gone are unknown to Kit.
Concerned, Kit watches the Director start the car and pull out of the parking lot brusquely. It's easy to see that reckless driving apparently runs in the family. After a few minutes of being on the road, Kit tentatively tries to ask Fluorite once again where they are heading. "Director…"
"I told you to shut your mouth."
With a snap, Kit does as told. He doesn't try asking again.
Finally, they arrive at their destination: a house on the far west sector.
Still too scared to try talking to the Director, Kit can only get out of the car and follow her meekly to the house's front door. She rings the doorbell, but there's no answer. They wait a full five minutes before the door opens a crack. A woman, most likely the housekeeper from the way she's dressed, pokes her head out.
"Yes?" the housekeeper asks. "How may we help you?"
"We're here from the BMA," the Director says.
The housekeeper's eyes widen for a fraction of a second. "Excuse me," she starts closing the door again, "just a minute please." The door closes with a click and they're back to waiting outside again. Thankfully, this time the wait is less, and soon the door is opening again. "Please come in," the housekeeper opens the door wide. "The madam is waiting for you in the living room down this hallway."
Fluorite brushes past them without a word.
"Thank you," Kit tells her before hurrying to catch up with the Director.
Walking side by side, Kit hears the Director mutter under her breath, "All this fuss for just one missing person. As if there weren't more important things to do. As if they were the only missing person! Fucking headquarters, who do they think they are, telling me how to do my job? Priority… Ha! Of course they would take priority when they're paying you all that money!"
A missing person? This must be the case he'd overheard her talking about with Kat yesterday. Which would mean… This is the woman whose husband was supposedly abducted by the demon!
Suddenly, Kit starts feeling his stomach twisting into knots. He doesn't want to get involved in a case like this. He doubts that he is even the right person to be selected for this job. What could he do? He wasn't going to go up against a demon.
His legs shaking underneath him, he makes his way to the living room, where an elderly lady is already waiting for them.
Hearing them approach, the woman turns around to face them. "Ah? You've finally come?" her tone is nothing if not polite, but her words are in complete opposite from the tone.
Kit can see the Director trying to stop herself from lashing out. 'Entitled bitch!' Kit can almost hear Fluorite spitting out the words. But she manages to rein herself in, keeping her face neutral.
"Please," the woman offers them a practised smile, one that is too perfect for it to be real, "have a seat."
"Thank you," the Director replies stiffly. Both Kit and her take a seat. A few beats of silence pass, until finally, the Director talks again, "How has your daughter been?"
"She's sleeping right now. The doctor had to prescribe her something so she would finally calm down. The poor thing…" The woman shakes her head. "It really hasn't been easy for her. Her husband, my son-in-law, he was always so good to her, and for this to have happened so suddenly… You must understand why she reacted the way she did, and why she wasn't able to meet with you today."
A muscle on the Director's forehead twitches. "Yes. We completely understand."
So it was the woman's daughter that had gone to the office yesterday.
"Of course, I know it would have been preferable if you could have talked to her. But, well…"
"Listen," the Director interrupts the woman, "just tell us anything you know. Any information is useful, alright?"
For a split second, the older woman's expression flickers; the polite smile she had been keeping up faltered and there's a flash of anger behind her eyes. But the next second she's back to schooling her expression; the change so fast that Kit almost believes he must have imagined it.
"Yes, yes," nothing about her smile seems strained, all traces of her previous anger have completely vanished off her face, "I would hate to waste your precious time." (Even if her tone held no hint of sarcasm, the slight intended by her words is clear.) "Where should I start?"
"Anywhere is fine." The Director's patience is running out.
"I'm afraid I don't have much to say…"
"Please just get on with it." It must be taking the Director's entire willpower to stop herself from just walking away from here.
"Very well." The woman smoothes her hands over her legs. "Since it was summer vacation, my daughter and her husband decided to come to spend the days off here."
The Director pokes Kit in the side. "Do as if you're writing something down," she whispers at him.
"W-what?" Kit whispers back. The Director can't seriously be expecting him to write on parchment or paper tags right? But one look at Fluorite's face tells him otherwise.
"Just do it. I don't care if you're just doing scribbles. Make her think you're taking notes."
By the time Kit gets something to write on and his pen out, the woman has already summarised the time they had spent in town.
"But, well, you see," the woman continues, "after the entire… fiasco with the warehouse a few weeks ago, my son-in-law had to travel back to the capital to take care of business. He was going to be coming back yesterday afternoon, and my daughter had gone to meet up with him at the train station and were going to be driving back together. But of course, that didn't happen, because… Well, I expect you know all about that."
"Right," Fluorite says dryly.
"I won't go into details about that; I doubt you want to hear my side of that story."
"Please. Keep on track."
"But after it was over, thinking it was all going to be alright, I get a call from my daughter, and she's screaming and crying and just talking absolute nonsense. I had no idea what she was talking about; she was absolutely hysterical. I tried to calm her down, ask her where she was, but she just kept going on about some demon, and kept repeating that 'he was gone' and had been taken away by the creature. I thought she had gone crazy. I had no idea who 'he' was. It wouldn't be until later…" She falls silent for a moment. "Did you know it took the police two whole hours to find her? Did they tell you how they found her, in the middle of the road outside of town, drenched in that… that blood rain? The car was completely destroyed, most of it was missing, and the driver's body… They say it was like they had turned his body inside out. I can't imagine what it must have looked like… What must have happened for his body to end up like that. And for two whole hours, my poor daughter was there, surrounded by that– that horrible scene."
The Director grits her teeth. 'What the hell do I have to do with the police, woman?!' her face clearly seems to say, 'Of course I know they're useless good-for-nothings! Why are you complaining to me about them?!'
"They took her to the hospital, and that was when I received a call that she was there. But when I arrived there, they tell me she had escaped. 'Escaped? Escaped where?' I asked, but those people couldn't even tell me how she had managed to get past them." The woman shakes her head. "At least she didn't go out and do anything crazy. I suppose the rest of the story you must be aware of."
Quickly, Kit's brain fills in the gaps. So desperate must she have been to find her husband, that she had escaped from the hospital and made her way to the Bureau's office, where Aster, and later Kat, had found her. From the sound of the woman's story, the probabilities that some demonic creature was behind the husband's disappearance are becoming more and more likely. But if that really is the case… It is no use looking for the man anymore. At this point, they would be lucky to find some sort of remnant that they could bury.
"Yes, thank you for your cooperation. Your… information will certainly prove to be very useful," Fluorite lies. "We will do everything in our power to—"
There is a sudden crash behind them, like the sound of a vase breaking on the floor.
"Fen!" The older woman stands up abruptly. There is a deep crease between her brows. "What are you doing here?! Didn't I tell you not to come down?"
"Fen?" Kit repeats. That name… Where had he heard that name before?
"Oh, yes. You must excuse me, but my grandson… Fen, come here. You might as well greet our guests now that you've come."
A young boy hurriedly makes his way to the woman's side. This boy… Ah, that's right! The pieces finally clicked in Kit's brain. This was the boy from the bakery from a few days ago!
This… This was…
Oh, no…
If Fen was this woman's grandson, that meant it was his father that had been killed. Suddenly, being in this room becomes suffocating, a nauseous feeling starting to build up in Kit's stomach the more he stayed here, looking at the boy.
His head bowed, Fen quietly greets them, "A pleasure to meet you." With his eyes downcast, he hasn't looked at Kit. Perhaps even if he did look at him, he wouldn't even recognise him. He must be going through a lot at the moment; none of the energy or youthfulness Kit remembers him having is present, instead he almost seems… hollow.
"It… It's nice to meet you too," Kit answers softly. Fluorite stays silent.
The woman nudges Fen. "Now, go back to your room." Fen only nods and does as told. Perhaps it's his imagination, but Kit can almost swear Fen's eyes look red and puffy.
After Fen has left, Fluorite pointedly clears her throat. "Well then, we will be leaving now. Once again, thank you for everything," she says stiffly. Her tone more seems to be saying 'go and die in a ditch', but the woman ignores it.
"Of course. Helga will see you out." The housekeeper from before appears out of nowhere.
"Please, if you would follow me…"
~~~
Out of the house, in the car on their way back to the office, the Director finally speaks to Kit.
"From now on, I will be entrusting this… investigation to you." She snorts. "Ha! Investigation! Fuck them and their stupid demands. Investigation they call it. More like a wild goose chase if you ask me. Damned bureaucrats. You offer them money and they will lick the shit directly from your ass!"
"D-director…"
"What is it?!"
"I… Why me?"
"Why you? Why you what?"
"Why am I in charge of looking for this person?" He had no idea where to even start. He had no clues. No nothing. What did she expect him to do?
"Because you're great at diplomacy." Her answer is fast, no hesitation. (Well… Compared to Fluorite, most people were great at diplomacy…) "You can make it seem like you're doing a bunch of official stuff, do some fancy fake tracking arrays and shit; I don't know!"
"I…" So she was just shrugging off her responsibilities and dumping them on him?!
"Listen, Kit, I couldn't care less what you do. Just make it seem to those people as if we're looking for the guy and that's it. If you find the corpse, great! If you don't, it doesn't matter. It's all the same. The guy's dead and that's a fact."
Kit stays quiet. The words of the Director weren't false, and yet… There was this part in the back of Kit's mind that he couldn't ignore. He barely knew Fen, didn't even know what the boy's father looked like, but he couldn't help but feel bad for the kid. To have such a cold, detached approach to it… He couldn't be like that.
Even knowing it was useless, he would try to find something. At least some sort of memento that they could hold on to.
When they get back to the office, the Director tells him one last thing: "Oh, yeah, I almost forgot. Go talk to Mousie and Gnocchi. Tell them not to come to the office anymore. I already called their parents, but it would be good if you went and saw them personally. Don't mention anything specific. I don't want them getting involved in any of this, you hear me? Tell them it's a direct order, and if they dare disobey it, I'll kill them myself."
Dropping him off, she then speeds away, off to god knows where.
~~~
Pointless, all pointless.
Kit rubs his hands across his face. Sitting in that empty office, all by himself, he feels like screaming. He hasn't seen neither Aster nor Baz in days, much less Kat or the Director. Jessica has stopped coming to the office too; the Director's orders. So now it's just him.
Him, alone, in this dark, cold room. For days, every single hour of the clock, he's been racking his brain, trying all and every single spell, seal, array that came to mind to find the missing person. But it's no use.
Totally pointless.
What was the point of all this? Why did he become a magician in the first place? Wasn't it because he wanted to help people? Ha! Great good he is being to anyone right now!
He couldn't even be a good teacher.
Thinking about how his talks with Mousie and Gnocchi went, he wants to tear his hair out.
Not surprisingly, Mousie had cried.
("Master Kit, please. Please don't go. I know you don't want to tell me anything, but I know." Mousie begged. "Why? Why won't you tell me anything?"
"I can't, Mousie."
"At least tell me you'll be fine."
"I can't. I can't lie to you.")
Gnocchi had been uncharacteristically quiet, hadn't even spoken a single word during the whole time. And Kit hadn't even been able to comfort them. He hadn't known what to say. In the end, all he could uselessly repeat over and over again was 'I'm sorry.'
He hadn't had the courage to call Dee, much less go see them.
At least he could be sure she would be taken care of at Jessica's house. At least she wouldn't have to be in immediate danger.
Lost in his thoughts, he doesn't hear the front door opening and someone making their way inside the office. It isn't until the person is right in front of them, that Kit notices their presence.
"Dee?" Kit bolts up from his seat. "What are you doing here?!"
Dee opens their mouth but before they can speak, Jessica comes running after her.
"Sorry," Jessica sounds slightly out of breath, "I tried to stop them, but they turned into a fox and escaped through the doggy door. I had to chase them all the way here." Jessica grabs Dee's hand. "Come on, Dee. We're leaving." She starts pulling them towards the door.
"I don't want to!" Dee screams, grounding their heels on the carpet so Jessica can't get them to move anymore. "Let me go! I don't want to be shut away all day!"
"Dee! Let's go!" Jessica pulls on their arm sharper, but Dee doesn't budge. Instead, they let themselves flop to the floor, their weight making Jessica stumble. "Stop that!" Jessica scolds. "Stop that, or I'll drag you back myself!"
"I don't want to go back!" Dee finally manages to yank their arm back. "I want to stay here!"
"You can't stay here! We shouldn't even be here in the first place!"
"Then you can leave! I want to stay!" Dee shouts, her hands clenched into fists. "I won't go back! You'll have to get me first if you want to take me back!"
"Dee!" Jessica sounds furious. She raises her hand, threatening to hit them.
All this time, Kit had been watching in silence everything occur, but finally, he decided to intervene. "Wait!" He steps forward, shielding Dee behind him. "Let me talk to them, alright? I'm sure I can make them see reason."
Jessica drops her hand. "Fine." She turns to walk away. "But if you don't manage to convince them, I'm not taking responsibility for them anymore. They can live on the street."
Kit knows it's just an empty threat, but he knows he'll have to try his best. Once Jessica has left, Kit turns to look down at Dee.
"So?" Dee crosses their arms over her chest.
Kit walks back behind his desk and takes a seat once more. "So what?"
"You're going to tell me to go back with Jessica, aren't you?" Dee sniffs. "Well, I already told you, I'm not going back."
"Why did you come running all the way here?" he asks them, a hint of annoyance behind his words. He doesn't have time to be dealing with this, and the only reason why he does, is because he knows if he doesn't, no one will.
Dee is taken aback by the tone of his question. "W-why?" They blink a couple of times. "Because I wanted to?"
"Hm. And why did you want to come? Didn't Jessica tell you you were to stay home until further notice? You have no business here." He doesn't mean to sound harsh, but it comes out sounding like that anyways. But he's too tired to care.
Dee opens and closes their mouth.
"You caused a lot of trouble to Jessica, you know? You shouldn't have escaped."
"But you–"
"But what?" he almost snaps.
Dee's face hardens. "I wanted to know what was going on. They just told me to stay in the house and not to go out under any circumstances. No one wanted to explain what was going on. What was I supposed to do? I wanted answers."
So stubborn, he thinks. His annoyance spikes. "That doesn't matter. You shouldn't have gone out."
"Why not? If no one wanted to tell me anything, I decided I was going to take matters into my own hands!" Dee stomps her foot. "Don't I have a right to decide? It's my life after all. I can't be the only one that doesn't know! You can't keep me in the dark!"
"That's not for you to decide!" He slams a fist on the desk and Dee jumps in fright. Too late, he realises she's never seen him get angry before, much less at them. "I…" He rubs his temple. He hadn't meant to get this angry, but all the stress from the past couple of days had gotten to him, and now he feels bad for having taken it out on Dee.
"You–" their voice sounds slightly shaky.
"Look, Dee," he sighs, "I'm sorry. I… I didn't mean to shout at you." Now that the moment has passed, he feels a growing sense of guilt, and he wants more than anything to make it right. He gestures for Dee to take a seat, and a bit hesitantly, they do. "Let's start over. Have a real talk, hm?"
"Talk? But you're not going to tell me to go back, won't you?" they ask bitterly. "You're just going to repeat the same thing: to go back with Jessica."
"Don't give me that look." Kit gives a tired sigh. "You should go back. It's for the best."
"Is that all you're going to say? No explanation? I just want to know what's going on. It's not that big of a deal, right? I'm not asking for much, I just…" Dee lowers their gaze. "I don't want to be ignored or just be brushed off. So why won't anyone tell me anything?" she says in a lower voice.
"It's…" Kit doesn't know how to answer. How does he explain this in a way that won't make them immediately freak out? How much was he allowed to say? He himself didn't even know half of what was going on. In the end, he chooses to settle for, "It's complicated."
"Complicated?" Dee frowns. "So you're not going to tell me anything either?"
"Sorry."
"Hmph." Dee grits their teeth. "Well, it's whatever. I was already expecting that answer," they say bitterly.
He sighs. "Listen, Dee…" Rubbing a hand over his eyes, he takes a deep breath. "This whole thing… I don't want you to be worrying about it, okay? There's a lot that not even I know. You just… have to be patient. I promise that when all of this is over things will go back to normal," he lies. He wants to believe that things can go back to how they were before, but the truth is, he can't. So he'll just have to pretend enough that Dee will not be able to see through his lie. Deep down, he feels bad about doing so, but he wants to protect Dee from the harsh reality. "In the meanwhile, you'll wait patiently and do as you're told, right? It would be of great help."
"...Fine."
"You'll go back with Jessica, then?"
"Sure, whatever." Dee flicks their hair over their shoulder. "You don't want me getting in the way."
"I didn't say that…"
"You implied it."
"I… Dee, it's not like that. You… Yes, I don't want you here, but not because you're a bother."
"Then why?"
"It's better for you. It's… safer."
"Whatever you say. I don't care." But they very clearly do care. "That's all grown ups ever do; tell you what's best for you."
"But it's true."
"Ah! There you go with the grown up talk again!" Dee balls her hands into fists. "Is it really so horrible you can't speak clearly about it?"
"Don't let it bother you," Kit evades her question.
"...Shouldn't it?"
Kit shakes his head. "You're still too young. There's no need for you to be concerning yourself with grown up talk."
"I guess…" Dee pouts. "But I don't like that you keep talking to me as if I were a baby."
"...I'm sorry. I promise you, once this is all over, I'll tell you everything, ok?"
"Promise it."
He hesitates. "Alright. It's a promise."
"Let's shake on it!" They spit on their hand and extend it to him.
"Dee!"
"Hehe, just kidding." They wipe their hand on their shorts. "But I will remember this!" She hops down from the chair. "I'll go with Jessica, but you better not forget about me, you hear me?"
"Of course I won't. How could I ever forget about you?"
CREATORS' THOUGHTS 
ghostcat
ghostcat look! i'm not dead!
Weekly Power Status
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Ranking 
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