I spend the rest of the day trying to act like I don't care that I have hickeys. People are staring, some of the UBAs (college boys, or as Tanaka calls them -skrrrtt niggas) even call me out on it. Praising the man that conquered and left their mark on me like that. It is weird how man talk of sex, when they talk of it they talk of conquering, of destroying as if the act itself is some kind of a war. And when women speak of sex they speak of being conquered, being overpowered. Only on social media do I see women captioning their pictures in ways that insinuate that they too have an upper hand in sex. It is not like that with Tsi and I, no contests to be won. Just bodies aflame, and hearts soaring.
I pretend not to notice the way people look at me, how they are quick to assume it's definitely a man who did it to me. I am killing Tsi today.