Chapter 139: I can go back?

"So, I can go back...? Is that true?"

"That is so, child of Gaia. It's not too late."

A surge of different memories started to flood my mind, ending up with a memory of me sitting at my kitchen table with Sophie. It had been one of our many little times where we just sat and drank some tea while talking about nothing and everything.

"-Hey... James?"

"-Yea? What's up?"

Thinking back at it, that girl had been showing more and more of her true colors as time went along, her doubts and insecurities slowly starting to emerge as she got more comfortable.

"-Thank you..."

"-Hmm? What did you say?"

"-Nothing. Anyway, are you planning any more dives? I am not letting you go without me again!"

Although I had pretended not to hear what she said, I knew what her words meant. I had no idea where she got the idea that I was someone she could trust and lean on, but it hadn't been a bad feeling.

Even if a big part of me felt like Sarah was the reason why I had to go back, it was merely a wall that I had built around me to disregard the fact that Sophie still depended on me. There was no doubt in my mind that I had strong feelings about Sarah but I hadn't even known her for half a year.

So the words that the goddess said about her accepting the demon's proposal...

'Wait...'

Turning my head up from the marble floor, I turned my eyes to the god in front of me, my head quickly regaining clarity. "Theia, did you already know about the demons infiltrating Kurat?"

A warm smile was planted on her face as she spoke equally warm words, "Yes, my child. We already knew that they would start by taking over Kurat. Although we aren't all-knowing, our prophecies are still potent enough to know most of the larger things that will happen in this war."

Now all the synapses in my brain started firing like crazy, my mind quickly making conjectures on conjectures. The conclusion that I started to make was making my heart grow darker by the second, and I couldn't stop my eyes from letting out a desperate blue.

*Swooosh!*

Just before I was about to open my mouth, a harsh wind started to blow inside the temple, signaling the entrance of a third actor. Clad in an identical suit like me and an identical mask on his face, it was weird to say that I was somewhat relieved to see the familiar god standing between me and Theia.

"Hmm? What's this? A god meddling with another one's apostle? I have to say, Theia, you are getting more and more similar to me as the years go by! I'm so proud!"

As the god was mimicking wiping a tear from his face in pride, Theia wasn't quite as relaxed. "I am not meddling, I am just explaining that he doesn't have to go through with your insanity. And are you really one to talk about meddling?"

Standing on the sidelines, the image I had about gods quickly went away when I heard them argue with each other. 'So gods aren't that different from mortals after all.'

Throwing me out of my thoughts, Loki took a hold of the conversation, somehow showing me that he wasn't at all afraid of the one I assumed to be the most powerful god. "No matter. Now, why don't you tell me exactly what you were thinking, throwing around the divinity gifted from Gaia to maintain our world just to try and separate my apostle from me?"

'What?'

Showing just how hard his words hit, the goddess's face crumbled. Taking a hold of her dress she tried her best to steer away from the topic, "That's not... I mean, yes but that's beside the point..."

"In what way would that ever be beside the point? And do you truly think that just by remolding my apostle's physical entity, he would somehow lose the divinity I planted inside of him?"

"You did what?!"

Taking a step to the side, Loki invited her to see the truth for herself, "Go ahead."

With hesitant movements, Theia approached me and placed her hand on my shoulder. Then, a strange sensation entered my body, as if a probe had entered me and was trying to find the source of my sickness.

It didn't take long until the face of the goddess paled, "Loki... What have you done...?!"

'Yes, what did you actually do?'

Laughing through his mask, my appointed god seemed incredibly appeased by her reaction. "Hohoho! Well, you see dear Theia. I don't particularly enjoy losing something of mine, especially not when it's such a treasure."

At this point, Theia almost appeared to be shaking, her hands desperately clutching to the hem of her dress, "Why are you willing to go to such an extent? Why are you willing to give up your life just to make sure he stays with you?!"

"Because if he dies, I lose. That's all there is to it."

It didn't take a genius to understand that whatever he had done to me, his life had gotten connected to mine. However, the reason why a god would do such a thing was something I couldn't understand at all.

Before Theia could open her mouth again, he continued on. "So, now you know that no matter what you do, he will still be my apostle. Can you still stand by the decision to give him another chance at living with those stupid humans? Or was it merely a ploy to try and dissuade him from working with me? Tell me, Theia, was your proposal really based on the fact that you wanted to give him a new chance?"

To me, it sounded like he was trying to get her to stand by her decision to send me back, but it was hard to see why he would want that.

'Does he want me to go back there?'

There was no doubt that if I did get a chance to go back, the available options for me would increase greatly. At this point, I only had Sebastian to act for me in Mensch, but that was nowhere the reach I needed if I wanted to affect the country as a whole.

Caught off guard yet again, the goddess didn't seem particularly good at dealing with the trickster in front of her, now pushed into a corner that would be impossible to get out of. If she suddenly changed her mind, that would mean that it truly wasn't for my sake that she wanted to 'help' me.

However, if she didn't, it would mean that she would accept to plant the apostle of Loki amid her children, giving me opportunities that I would have a hard time acquiring otherwise.

"T-That... I mean, it didn't sound like James was too keen on going back anyway..."

Somehow, I felt like I could sense the eyes of Loki going toward me, signaling that this was my cue. Getting rid of my mask, I put on the brightest smile I could muster while speaking as if I was truly the victim here.

"As I said, I didn't think it was possible to go back. But if it's true that I can go back, and I don't have to lose my connection to the god who saved my life, I don't see a reason not to."

Unable to properly retort to my words, I went in for the kill. Going down on my knees and putting my forehead on the cold floor, I finished the conversation. "Please. Give me another chance at happiness."

This was, after all, the best of both worlds for me. Although I had no intentions of getting along with the humans of Mensch, I couldn't help but feel a need to watch over the few I still found important. Though it had to be said that there was really only one person I was thinking of.

If things truly were like I thought it was, I didn't want Sophie to get caught up in this sick game of the gods. To some extent, I had finally understood what Loki was trying to get at and just how fucked up this world truly was.

So in the end, Theia had to surrender any and all hopes of winning this battle, even if the end result was what she had wanted from the beginning.

"I-I'm...Yes, my child. You will get another chance at redemption. However... You must at least make a contract with me that you will not fight for the side of the demons. At least that much... I should be able to demand."

Rising to my feet, I played the role of an avid believer, "Of course. I promise you that I will not lead humans to extinction and I will not be a puppet for the demons to use."

'After all, aren't I the one who will be using them?'