Side Story 6: Immortal Crane
A few weeks passed and Walmart was an outstanding success. Every person in Liyue has heard of it and it was the most popular store currently. Selling produce that was dirt cheap and were of the highest quality, clothing fit for the qixing that even commoners can buy. And most importantly, women were buying tons of make up and clothes. Marvelling at the effects of lotions and shampoos. Beauty is omniversal after all, women just can't get enough of it. As Ein was swimming in Mora while naked, just like Scrooge Mcduck.
"I'm rich baby!" He always wanted to try and swim on money. Ein could do that back in earth, but currency in a different world just hits different. He had enough fun and was sitting on a makeshift chair of mora. "Hmm, now I should probably give this to Ganyu. She's working a bit too much after all, you got to give some to the plebs Ganyu." He sighed and took out a scanner that would identify important stuff and separate the shitty documents that were put there by lazy bums.
"If you work, you lose after all. Words of wisdom to go by. Why do it if other people can? Just build a base and watch them work hard and see the money roll in." Of course business doesn't work like that, but that's irrelevant.
He hanged out with Ganyu a couple of times after that, making her some dishes that were low in calories but exquisitely delicious. Making her more happy than ever, she could eat delicious stuff after all without dieting and exercising for it.
He arrived at Ganyu's office and the staff made way, his walmart quickly became gigantic for Liyue's commerce. Even getting stuff from Inazuma with Yae's intervention, and he was also regulating the products that were sold to other establishments for wholesale so the economy won't collapse while investing in livelihood. His work and business were praised by the Liyue Qixing, making his position basically immovable in the nation.
If his products and establishment were to be gone, riots would occur almost immediately. He made an announcement one day when people were making problems in his store, ripping some clothes, swapping items. That he would close down as he never thought Liyue was such a disgusting nation that housed unsavory characters. Controlling even the politics as the qixing immediately cracked down on the perpetrators, as people started to get antsy after just a few days of his shop closing down. It was also not helping that people thought of him as an adeptus, sacred beings that were worshipped in Liyue.
"Heh, amateurs. I control this nation now, people can't live without isekai walmart here, and they could do nothing kekeke." He rubbed his hands and entered Ganyu's office. Giving a light greeting, seeing as she was buried in paperwork. "Yo, Sweet Rain. You look a bit troubled there." He used her name's literal meaning to tease her as she sighed heavily.
"Ein, I told you not to call me that." She pouted at him and then smiled wide. "So? Did you bring me lunch or something? I'm actually pretty hungry right now..." Her eyes became dazed and was imagining his divine cooking.
"Hmm, is that what you only think of me? Your personal chef or something? I thought you were my good friend Ganyu!" He faked being hurt and was very very convincing. Controlling his facial expressions to a T and even started to tear up.
"Awawawa, no! It's just... Whenever you come here you give me a treat, and I just got used to it is all. Mou~ you're teasing me again aren't you!?" She glared at him while he laughed. "Well, you're just so innocent you little cutie you. I have lunch right here! But also a special surprise." He took out a lunch box and the scanner, multiple ones. So that she could separate the documents based on categories, upping her efficiency to the max.
"Ohh? What is that?" She stared at it curiously and touched it, the gadget lit up and started talking with his voice. "Ganyu jou-chan, we'll be assisting you with work. So you could finish it all in a few minutes." She got surprised and looked at Ein with a raised brow.
"Pretty neat right? They'll sort every document and prioritize the important ones, giving you a summary. So you could just sign or stamp them automatically, they also could if they don't need your supervision. Make a new policy that everything arrives at the morning and nothing would come in after. Except things that need rapid response of course." He nodded in satisfaction as Ganyu looked at the machines in wonder.
"Wh-why thank you. Let's test them and see if they really do work as well as you described." She then put stacks on the scanners and they started to analyze them at blinding speeds. Sorting ones that were important and stamping the others with her signature. In a few minutes, they were all done and she only had a small stack that needed her attention. She checked it all and they were correct.
"Wow, this is amazing... I mean, I do like the work that Rex Lapis has entrusted me with, but it is quite... Overwhelming." She gave a wry smile as he raised a brow at the name. "Rex Lapis huh? I do know that guy, want me to request you a leave or something? I know you work every day of the week."
Ganyu was startled at his words. "You know Rex Lapis!? How? Nobody knows where the geo archon is... Are you possibly an archon or something?" She eyed him suspiciously as he gave a smug grin. "Ohh, you could say I taught him a lesson. All of the original 7 of them, they were quite unruly back then." He chuckled as Ganyu gasped at the thought of him schooling the archons. 'Well, best that she doesn't know I killed one of them too.'
"Ohhh, want to see Ei and Makoto's dance lesson?" She got confused as she didn't know who those are. "Ahhh, they're the gods of Inazuma now as far as I can remember. They were pretty fast learners too!" Of course the sisters would be. Or they risk the world.
"Wh-what!?" He then took out a tv and started fiddling with the remote. There, Ganyu saw a film of the Raiden Shogun and her sister dancing with maid clothes on. "Master~ do you like it?" They said with a flirty voice, making Ganyu choke on her saliva.
"I... I feel like I'm watching something illegal." 'How would Yae or worse, Inazuma react to this?' She looked at Ein that was laughing as she started to sweat. 'He's more dangerous than I thought... I wish he doesn't make me do that or something. I should probably ask cloud retainer about him, she must have information about someone teaching the archons.'
She gained her wits and poked him. "Aren't you just bullying them?" He looked at her like she was talking nonsense. "They were unruly remember? That's their little punishment, oh. I should show this to Yae when I go to Inazuma. Come with me okay? Travelling with others is much more exciting, don't worry about work I'll make Rex Lapis be the secretary for a few months."
Ganyu gulped and decided to not retort to that. As she just witnessed the evidence that he could do that. She laughed nervously and nodded. "Of course... I'll come with, now that I think about it. I haven't went out of Liyue in a long time." Ganyu supervised this nation being built from the ground up. She was here since it's inception and it isn't wrong to say that without her, Liyue won't be the same.
"I'll be visiting Mondstadt for a bit. A friend is in dire need of things you see? And maybe I'll build a walmart there too. But I'll return in a jiffy." He poked her nose and patted her head. "Bye sweet rain, don't forget lunch." She got embarrassed as he always managed to rile her up. She said her goodbyes and he disappeared like the wind.
She sighed and looked at the food he prepared. "I didn't know you were that amazing... Well, at least I do know you're very kind and caring." She looked at the scanners and took a bite of his food, giving a wide smile as she planned on visiting Cloud Retainer due to finishing work in record time.
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Ein teleported in Mondstadt and tried to find Mona. He quickly found her and she was on a bench, looking haggard while looking at her wallet. "Hah, I don't have any mora anymore again. I guess should I just be a fortune teller? No! I shan't be using hydromancy and astrology for the sake of mora! But I'll be living on salads again." She was agonizing and Ein simply felt bad at her situation. It was honestly pitiable.
"Yo, Mona. Did you miss me?" She looked at the familiar voice and saw him. "Ein? Where did you go? You suddenly disappeared from the city and I thought you just went off and died or something."
He laughed and sat down with her. "So? Having problems with life?" She sighed and started to bite her lip. "If only I could focus on research, just like that man. Life without being bogged down by mundane worldly affairs! It would be wonderful." She was obviously frustrated and was having a tough time trying to get by, making Ein smile wryly. Patting her back tenderly.
"You know, how about we have some lunch? I was in Liyue and I'll cook you some of their specialties. I'm quite good you know?" He smiled as she perked up. "Really? Ahem, sure. I appreciate the gesture, being an astrologer. Sustenance is surely welcomed so I can continue my research."
He bopped her nose as she blushed from embarrassment. "Don't worry. You did show me around here back then, I'm quite grateful for that. And Mondstadt's number one astrologer deserves some good food now doesn't she?"
Mona nodded and stood up, leading him to her house as she deemed him to be a good guy. Giving her groceries back then and leaving immediately so she wouldn't refuse. It lasted her for some time and it was surely welcomed.
They arrived at a door with seals as Mona quickly opened it. He saw tons of books and telescopes, entering the surprisingly near house. "Ohh, you keep the place tidy. Good job." He gave a thumbs up as Mona snorted. "What, you didn't expect it or something? I'm the number one astrologer, of course I keep my research nice and in order."
He smiled and patted her head as she took off her hat. "Okay, ms. Astrologer, such a tsundere you are. Though you are more smug and prideful, just wait for a bit okay?" She pouted at him and started to wait.
She thought of why he would do this. And was quite perplexed, he doesn't know much about her after all. "What a weirdo, but this is much appreciated. I will repay this debt later." After a few more minutes, she started to smell a delicious aroma. Making her drool, she hasn't had breakfast yet after all because simply, she is broke as hell.
"Here, I made tons of food. Eat to your heart's content." He arrived with chinese cuisine and that almond tofu dessert that made Mona's eyes shine. They looked like art, and she hasn't had this much food on the table for a long time.
Gulping her drool, she picked up a fork and started to eat. "Ahnnn~" She covered her mouth and blushed like a tomato. 'Wh-what is this!? Is this the food of the gods? It is simply divine!' She slowly took more while seeing him smile smugly at her. "Told you, good right? Go on, that's just for you."
She simply nodded and started to eat again. Marveling at the taste, melting into her chair as she chewed. After some time, she finished it all and was absolutely stuffed. "Ahhh, I haven't been this full since forever."
He gave a smile and had an idea. "Hey Mona, you're the best astrologer right? I'm quite interested in it, but I'm a businessman you see." She perked up and puffed out her chest. "Of course! You won't see someone better than me!"
He chuckled at her pride. "Well, I would like to invest in your research. How about it? Pretty good no? I'll learn more and you'll have more leeway in your research." Her eyes glowed as she thought that this must be her lucky break. Thanking the stars.
"Are you sure? I mean, yes! I will unravel the mysteries of the stars. And you won't be disappointed with my discoveries for sure." She had a smug look on her face, but she was surely happy.
"I see, well I'll look forward on it. You're going to receive some new equipment and funding later. I'll hire someone to deliver it to you, take care of yourself best astrologer." He patted her head and left.
"Hehehe~ That stupid Albedo won't get ahead of me now! I can finally focus more on hydromancy and discerning the mysteries of this world! This was ordained by fate! Long had I forseen it." She got excited and even cursed her co-worker Albedo that was in better condition than her. She then calmed down and remembered the delicious dishes he prepared.
"Thank you, this means a lot to me. I will show you that your trust in me will not be wasted."
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Ein decided to make a walmart here in Mondstadt as well so Mona could get groceries for cheap. Also to control the city's commerce, but of course he would also be questioned again by the knights of Favonius again, and he didn't like that pirate cosplayer.
"Well, if he learned his lesson. He'll stay clear and won't dig. This is the city of the free after all, what a shame. That Jean and Lisa looked to be good people and they might have more information about the world. "If he still does want to annoy me with his schemes. A sudden change of personality can't be explained anyway." He would just wipe him clean and call it a day.
Kaeya shivered and dropped a glass of wine in a bar. Making the red haired owner raise a brow. "What's the matter Kaeya." He asked his annoying little brother, as this is very out of place for his usual relaxed and confident self. "Nothing... I must be tired, that's all." He felt like he was in danger and was about to get killed, sweating copiously.
Ein finished signing papers for some land and built it almost instantly as well, not caring about the knights. "Hah, I sure hope that nobles aren't a thing here that will demand shit, or I'm going to give them lobotomies galore." He finished decorating the place and was about to recruit some employees, when he saw a little girl with unique ears running around.
"Lalala~ Dear Anemo God, please make Klee's bombs blow in the right direction and only blow up bad guys. The end." The little girl said with a bright smile, making Ein amused. He walked up to her. "Hey sweetie, what's your name? And what are you doing here?" He gave a smile while patting her head. (Pic here)
She looked at him and gave a greeting, looking cute as hell. "Spark Knight Klee of the Knights of Favonius!, reporting for duty! ...There's some more, but uh, I forgot. I'm not so good at remembering..." She fidgeted and took out a handbook from her bag, looking like an elementary schooler.
"Hngh! Damn, this little creature is too cute." He mumbled, he then took out some candy and gave it to her. "So? What'cha doing around here little Klee? I'm Ein, call me big brother okay?" He eyes lit up and took the candy, savoring it as she never had candy that good before.
"Thank you Ein-nii! Do you wanna come fish blasting with me? I'll get grounded for a whole day, but it's way worth it coz the fish taste sooo goood!" She gave a wide smile and casually suggested dynamite fishing.
"Is that legal around here? Well, it is the land of the free... Okay my little cute knight! Lead the way!" She got excited and jumped up and down, having a companion that didn't scold her was rare after all.
"Un! Let's go! There's a lake nearby and we're gonna catch loooooots of fishies!" She started to run with enthusiasm, thinking of the delicious fish they'll get.
"Hey, slow down little missy. I know, how about I show you something nice!" He picked her up and started to levitate from the ground. "Woahhhh! Ein-nii, you're super cool! You can fly without gliders! Let's gooo!" She giggled and enjoyed the wind as he laughed.
Arriving at the lake, Klee started to unpack her bombs. "Hehe~ Mwauhahaha, lucky all my new bombs are waterproof!" She then lit them up and threw them into the water. An explosion rumbled at the lake and after a few moments, fish started to float.
Ein clapped and patted her head. "Good girl Klee! We have tons of fish now. I can prepare them and we'll have delicious fish." She nodded and was satisfied by his praise. Nobody praises her when she was blowing up things in Mondstadt.
Ein started to prep them and roasted them in some fire while Klee drooled, fidgeting on her seat as she was getting impatient. "Ein-nii! Is it done yet!? They look suuuuper amazing!" He chuckled and cooled one down, handing it to her while also taking out the bones. "Here you go little knight. What a great catch, enjoy your hard work."
She took a bite and was surprised by their extra deliciousness. "Ohhhhhh! Ein-nii! You're simply the best, Klee can't make them this good." She ate with glee and almost finished them all, making him smile.
"Hey Klee. Want to see some amazing explosions?" He was used to his kids wanting to blow things up and Klee reminded him of them. "Amaaaazing ones?" She got excited and looked at him with anticipation.
"Umu, I'll show you some very nice explosions. Like baaam! And kapow." He exaggerated as Klee stood up and immediately pulled his sleeve. "Let's go Ein-nii! I want to see!"
He then put her in his arms and flew, finding an isolated place without people near Mondstadt, he found one immediately and there were only some masked goblin like people there. "Some hilichurls! They're bad guys Ein-nii! Let's blow them up!" She pointed at the monsters and was about to use her vision, powers that were given by the gods by chosen users. And hers were simply, destructive. Being pyro and boosted by her wild imaginations, she could summon explosions with her fingertips that gave the knights migraines.
"Ohhh? Bad guys huh? I'll show you how this big brother takes care of them then." He erected a barrier around the place and on them so Klee won't get harmed. Ein flew away for a bit confusing Klee. "Ein-nii, I thought you were gonna blow them up."
"Shhh, wait for it Klee. Patience is a virtue, and I'll show you some pretty nice explosions." He willed 10 kgs of antimatter, the sphere travelled silently with a coating so it won't explode prematurely. The hilichurls were minding their business in their camp and wasn't aware of an overwhelming bomb coming.
"You see Klee, that thing can explode stronger than castle bravo. A bomb from where I'm from, it will go kaboom! Just wait, remember too. When you make explosions, always say this."
The hilichurls noticed a sphere that arrived at the middle of their camp. They then touched it and the coating was taken off. "Art, is an explosion. Katsu!" BOOM. A blinding light washed all over the surroundings, even people from Mondstadt saw it and wondered if a 2nd sun appeared near them.
The bomb then went off, vaporizing anything on its way. Burning the hilichurls in a fireball that were millions of degrees. Teyvat hasn't seen an explosion like this since time immemorial, blasting the surroundings with 90 petajoules of pure energy. Luckily, it was contained and the blast radius only covered a hundred meters or so.
"Wowwwwww..." Klee looked in admiration as she never seen such an explosion before. "Well? Beautiful right? How about it? This big brother wasn't lying you know?" He chuckled as Klee looked at the mushroom cloud that appeared after the explosion.
"Un! You're the best Ein-nii! The bestest in Teyvat! That was suuuuuper duuuuper amazing!!! Do it again!" He laughed and patted her head. "Hmm, maybe some time later. You might get in trouble you know? A knight mustn't leave their post and abandon it. And this will be our little secret. Or no more explosions." He winked at her and put a finger on her little lips.
"Un! I promise! I won't tell anyone! You promise too okay? We will blow things up later." She hugged him tight and nuzzled to his chest. "Okay, I promise. When I'm not busy, we'll go and blow things up. Rex Lapis can just make new mountains or something." They then returned to Mondstadt and Klee didn't want to leave him. Clinging to his leg and crying.
"Ein-nii. Do you really have to go!? You're the bestest ever and I want to hang out more..." She said sadly as he received damage. "Ugh, Klee. You're the spark knight right? You have duties, and I do too. Don't worry, I'll come back later, that's a promise." He put out his pinky and she sniffled.
"Okay. Bye Ein-nii. Don't forget okay!? Or I'll blow up your house." She waved goodbye and ran with her little legs back to the headquarters. "Hah, what a cute little kid. Just like that Qiqi zombie. I just hope she's enjoying life right now." He then started to recruit employees for the walmart here.
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After a couple of days, it was now stable and there were no hiccups. Mondstadt immediately liked the new mall and people went in droves. "I guess I'll return to Liyue for now. I hope Mona and Klee likes their presents." He gave Mona a telescope with special filters and a ridiculous magnification that can see stars even billions of lightyears away. While Klee received a plushy and some grenades that of course have a quick instruction and safety measures, only exploding when there are no life around and erecting a barrier for Klee or allies. Except when the AI in it detects hostiles.
Ein then teleported to Liyue and tried to find Ganyu. "Hmm? She's at a mountain? I guess having her work done for her gave her some time to enjoy nature." He felt her presence on a mountain and flew there so he won't surprise her or the ones with her.
He saw a crane like being and a woman with silvery white hair, holding a convoluted spear. Looking all cool. "Yo, Ganyu. I see you have some friends, want to introduce me?" He gave a smile as the crane and the woman looked at him with interest. (pic here)
"Is this the one you talked about Ganyu? One is thankful for your care of her, she likes work as much as the bounties of the lands of Liyue. This one is named Cloud Retainer." A female voice resounded in his mind as he looked at the crane.
"Haha, she sure is. And I'm Ein, I just saw that Ganyu was overworked and at her office every day. So I helped a bit with her work is all."
"Mou~ I don't work that hard... Maybe." The crane laughed at her. "See, you doubt even your own freedom as you work tirelessly for Liyue Ganyu. And this is one's disciple, Shenhe."
"My name is Shenhe." She gave a slight bow, her facial expression unchanging. "Nice to meet you too. Not a talker huh? Emotional bindings?" He observed her and felt energy in the red ropes on her that was linked to her brain.
She gasped and the crane was surprised as well. "It seems you are not normal, this one is intrigued about your origins Ein. Ganyu has asked for knowledge about you and she claims that you know Rex Lapis?" The crane was sure he wasn't an evil god, but his origins leave more to the imagination.
"Ahhh, yes I do actually. Want me to call him here or something? He'll come quick, he can't refuse me after all." The crane was shocked and looked at Ganyu, she nodded and the crane sighed.
"One will believe you, Ganyu does not lie after all. She's such a sweet child, one just cannot believe that you have taught the archons thousands of years ago."
Shenhe was surprised at this revelation. After all, as a disciple of an adeptus, she knows how powerful even the subordinates of Morax are, and he was a teacher of them. 'He must be treated with care, I surely cannot beat him.'
"Well, enough of that. How about we celebrate Ganyu's release from endless work and have a little banquet?" He took out a table, some drinks, and food that was for vegetarians just to be safe.
"One cannot thank you enough for that. Ahhh, how about hearing stories of Ganyu's stories when she was but a little child? One fondly remembers her cute moments, wanting her horns to be caressed and sulking if one does not do it." She chuckled as Ganyu's face turned an atomic red.
"Cloud Retainer! Don't tell him that!" Both of them laughed while Shenhe started to drink some tea that Ein prepared. Completely ignoring their talks.
"Haha, why do you not want him to? Is this what humans call being embarrassed in front of the ones they are fond of?" Ganyu almost choked as Ein patted her head. "Oya? So you liked your horns being caressed? My hands are quite dexterous Ganyu."
They teased her to no end as they started to partake in the banquet. "Hmm, Shenhe, did you like the treats? I made them myself." Ein included her in their talks as she was isolating herself.
"Un, it is delicious. Thank you." She was a woman of few words and a tough nut to crack, making him smile. "How about this, try it. It's approved by Ganyu."
She looked at the almond tofu that was dripping with a luscious sauce. Piquing her curiosity, she took a spoonful of it and tasted it. "Hmmm~" She cracked a small smile and started to eat it with vigor.
"Ohhh? One hasn't seen you like this Shenhe, your cooking surely must be exquisite?" The crane tried it and was surprised. "Hmmm~ One hasn't tried something of this caliber in one's life."
He chuckled. "Nothing much, just practice. So, Shenhe. Did you like it? Here, have some more." She quickly took the dishes and tried the delicacies. "You are a good cook, I like these." Which is high praise coming from her.
"So, do you have any questions Cloud Retainer? I'm sure you have some." He sipped some tea, waiting for her inquiries.
"One is pleasantly surprised at your adept reading of my desire. Now that you saw through the red ropes. Do you have anything that can help Shenhe? She is a good child, and it pains one to use it on her." Shenhe looked at them and was surprised by her master's words.
Cloud retainer has info on him after all. Morax came at her abode to inform her of him, warning the adeptus in never antagonizing him at any cost. And she also knew he rid Xiao of his karmic debt which is something even the geo archon himself couldn't do.
"Hmmm, I can. But what's in it for me?" He gave a grin as the mood became awkward. "Uhhh, Ein that's..." Ganyu can't think of anything that would make him agree, remaining silent as she looked onto the one who raised her.
"That... One does not know what is it you desire. Please do tell." She didn't have any choice, she can't pressure him and he is someone more powerful and grand than even the archons. She cannot think of something that he would need.
"Hmmm, it's not much. Just something from Shenhe." The three tensed and thought what is it that he wanted from her. "How about a date in Liyue?" He smiled as everyone got shocked.
"Date? One doesn't understand... What would you need a date from Shenhe when you could just peer into a calendar?" Ganyu facepalmed and remembered that they live out here in the mountains. She felt a headache coming and Ein was looking at her to explain.
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Thanks for reading! Klee saw the most magnificent explosion! Maybe next time a supernova would be better? I quite like Shenhe, she's basically doomslayer that is calm. Anyways, ciao.
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