Silly Order
AN: Septem, tis' a silly place.
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The big-breasted red-haired woman, apparently called Boudica, thanked Zvezdnyy profusely for resurrecting the soldiers. For some odd reason, her Polkovodets insisted that she could only do this once every year.
Why did her Polkovodets lie? In Zvezdnyy's mind, her Polkovdets was always someone who told the truth. From her perspective, never once has her Polkovodets lied to her. All her words were truth absolutes.
It was like a kid seeing their parents smoke when they preached about how smoking is bad for you. The girl could not comprehend it.
Thus, just as the army was heading back to Rome on Emperor Nero's order, Zvezdnyy approached her Polkovodets, who were carrying large boxes of metallic ingots.
"My Polkovodets?" Zvezdnyy called out, prompting the Goddess to stop walking and turn her head to face the blonde-haired girl. Her voice had some uncertainties, so Zvezdnyy cleared her throat and continued, "For what reason doth thou lie about mine abilities?"
"...It feels cruel for them." Her Polkovodets said after a few seconds of deliberation, "Here we are, in the past, with extremely powerful abilities capable of easily dictating the course of history, yet we're restricted. All the changes we did were for nothing. Like an art app that automatically deletes whatever you've created the moment you log off."
For some reason unknown to Zvezdnyy, her Polkovodets scratched her neck. She had a different look in her eyes.
Those eyes spoke of pain, but that pain disappeared the moment she dropped her hands.
"But why, pray tell? If it matters naught, then why deceive? Why Obmanyvat?"
Her Polkovodets' eyebrows twitched. Lips flattening into an unamused line, the Goddess replied, "I don't want a repeat of what happened in the last Singularity. Others would worship you, and the moment you step out of line, do something unexpected, and they'll turn on you."
Zvezdnyy recalled how quickly the villagers turned on her. How in the span of mere minutes love turned into hatred—enough hatred for the villagers to try and kill her.
"Ah, now I comprehend. 'Tis clear to me now. Should my powers appear constrained, I would not manifest as a Messiah in their minds."
"Yes, exactly. You are an extraordinary girl in an ordinary world, Zvezdnyy. You must learn constraint, learn that you should only use an appropriate amount of force for a given situation and never go over."
There was a knowing tone that underlies her Polkovodets' voice, as though she was very familiar with the problems of 'using too much'.
With that done, her Polkovodets continued helping the soldiers with their job. Even when Emperor Nero came and said, "Why is a Goddess here toiling with menial work? Do you consider Rome to be so grand that you would do anything you can to help? Umu, that must be why you're here helping the soldiers pack up."
Her Polkovodets had her stay around Ritsuka while she busied herself with more work. Work. Work. Work! It's always work! Zvezdnyy sulked while kicking the ground.
"Oh hey, Zvezdnyy!" Ritsuka approached. As though suddenly comprehending something, Ritsuka took a dramatic pose, "I hear through the grapevines that you had to write an essay. How is it? How did your Polkovodets think of it?"
The Way of Drama. Yes, this should get her mind off things.
"I have completed my essay with valor, my fellow compatriot in the Way. Alas, my efforts were rewarded with a mere 80 out of 100, a result more disappointing than I had foreseen."
"Mufufufu, what result did you foresee?" Ritsuka leaned forward so he was closer to the girl.
"I harbored expectations of a perfect score, a flawless triumph. Alas, such a glorious achievement eluded my grasp, slipping through my fingers like sand in the wind."
Zvezdnyy made a grabbing motion with her hands towards the sun.
"Alas. I will endeavor to do better this time." Zvezdnyy's hands fell down to her sides, "I will achieve that perfection. As the Witch who will save all of humanity swears."
Ritsuka suddenly felt an uncontrollable urge to pat Zvezdnyy's head. She was indeed an adorable kid, someone who the teen could easily see as a little sister—an enjoyable little sister, not those brats who constantly fight tooth and nail with their brothers.
Listening to that urge, Zvezdnyy was momentarily stunned in silence and inaction as someone other than her Polkovodets started patting her head— her most sacred place.
"Mmm, I am completely and absolutely sure that you, the Witch who would save all of humanity, would have no problem reaching that perfection so long as you fight just a little bit harder."
"Yes yes, enough." Zvezdnyy slapped Ritsuka's hand away after feeling its presence upon her hair for too long. Spreading her arms out as though to welcome her audience, "Now—mff!"
The girl was suddenly smothered in a pair of large breasts. Her limbs floundered about like a fish out of water before she started trying to push away so that she could breathe.
"Thank ye so much, for returnin' those soldiers back to life Zvezdnyy!" Boudica said affectionately.
The hard leather parts of Boudica's corsets bit into Zvezdnyy's cheeks. Though it didn't hurt, it was uncomfortable. "I… can't… breathe!"
In an instant, Boudica's large and bountiful chest deflated and flattened. It didn't sag like a pair of balloons without air but rather retracted into the body. This reduction in breast sizes caused Boudica's mature disposition to appear far younger, almost like that of a pre-pubescent girl.
"What?"
"Haaaah!" Zvezdnyy took in a large gulp of air that was denied to her before.
Boudica herself looked at her missing chest in mounting, silent horror. The corset that was worn around Boudica's body was meant for a much larger-breasted woman. It was unchanged by Zvezdnyy's wish, and thus, the actual caps were hanging off like Christmas ornament, revealing the nipples underneath.
Even so, this exposure was secondary to how her breasts were gone.
"My bosom!"
Boudica cupped her hands over where her chest was supposed to be. She heard a harsh slap as her hands hit rungs of hard ribs instead of the soft flesh that constituted her breasts. "How did this— what— how—? Did ye—?"
Boudica was struggling to get anything out. It was like someone trying to get too many words out at once, and those words were stuck because of how small the exit was.
"Whew." Zvezdnyy rubbed her cheeks since they were sore from being pressed up against hard leather.
Ritsuka meanwhile was just staring at Boudica. He was unmoving, motionless as a stone statue as his eyes couldn't be removed from the Servant's exposed chest.
As Zvezdnyy continued to rub her cheeks, the girl noticed how Boudica was still massaging her non-existent chest.
Pulling down her left eyelid while showing her tongue in the form of what she read as a 'blowing raspberry', "Bleuh." Zvezdnyy said, "Such is the consequence of your impulsive act of squishing me against your chest without provocation."
"Wait! Please change it back, I promise I won't do it again! That's a big sis guarantee!"
Zvezdnyy responded, "Maybe if you catch me."
Then, turning on a dime, Zvezdnyy ran away, and a sphere of distorted light surrounded her body. Her speed was incredible, faster than even a car on the highway.
"What—? Be she truly a human and not a Servant?" Even Boudica was shocked.
"Spatial distortion, detected." Mash said as she too, looked at the steadily disappearing form of Zvezdnyy, "Zvezdnyy is likely warping the space around her, shortening distances to move faster."
Boudica looked thoughtful for a moment, before suddenly pulling out her sword from the scabbard. There, raising it up high, Boudica summoned forth a chariot pulled by two very fine horses of white. Her Noble Phantasm <Chariot of Boudica>.
Riding upon that chariot, Boudica lost the worried and panicked look and instead looked like a warrior queen, the same one who led her people into battle against the Romans during the Boudican Revolt.
"Get on," Boudica commanded.
Ritsuka and Mash got into the chariot with no issue.
"Can't believe I'm saying this, but we're gettin' my breasts back."
The horses moved and pulled the chariot along with them. Ritsuka struggled as the sudden movement lurched him backward into Mash, who thankfully held onto the chariot's frame and kept the black-haired teen from falling off.
"Come on, Diamond Jubilee, Golden Jubilee! Faster, catch up to that lass!" Boudica shook the reins to the horses.
From Ritsuka's perspective, the biting wind suddenly became much more intense as another jolt almost sent him over the edge of the chariot.
"We… should probably get Kukulkan involved."
"The Goddess, Senpai?"
"Yeah, she's probably the only one who could stop Zvezdnyy."
Sitting down inside the chariot, Ritsuka brought his bracelet close to his mouth before speaking into it. "Um, are you there, Goddess Kukulkan?" He had already opened a channel beforehand.
"I'm here, over."
Ritsuka snapped his fingers as he realized he was supposed to add an 'over' when he finished to greenlight the other side to respond basically.
"Not sure if you noticed the commotion, but the current situation is that Zvezdnyy made Boudica's…" Ritsuka paused as he tried to find a word to respectfully describe breasts, "Boudica's chest to be much smaller—"
"She WHAT?"
Kukulkan violated proper protocols as the information was just too shocking.
Just as the teen was about to respond, "OOF!" He was suddenly thrown against a side of the chariot once more as Boudica turned at a sharp angle.
"Senpai!" A worried Mash descended upon Ritsuka, examining him all over for any injuries.
"Are you alright? I'm flying up now to get a better view. Over."
Ritsuka placed a hand on Mash's shoulder, telling her nonverbally how he was fine. Returning to his wrist, "Yeah, I'm fine. Currently, Boudica is chasing her down using a chariot and me and Mash are on it. Over."
"...Alright, I see you guys and Zvezdnyy. Can you tell Boudica to stop? I'll deal with this. Over."
Ritsuka glanced at a fierce Boudica, uncertainty in his voice, he replied, "I'll try. Over."
Getting up, Ritsuka tapped on Boudica's shoulder to get her attention—
"What be it? I'm busy controllin' the horses right now." Boudica demanded.
Instead of falling over and following her orders like last time, Ritsuka gulped and stood his ground, calmness in his tone, "Goddess Kukulkan said that she'll deal with this. She asks you to stop chasing Zvezdnyy."
"..."
The wind slowed down as Boudica pulled on the reins of the horse. In 20 seconds, the chariot went from halfway to supersonic down to a snail's pace before halting entirely.
"Fine. I'll let the Goddess deal with this." Boudica moved to cover up her exposed chest by taking out several ropes and binding the loose cups of the corset.
Before anyone could say anything else, a green streak of light blitzed across the sky like a meteor. The green meteor came down but didn't crash as it halted just before it could touch the ground. Then, that meteor flew, following Zvezdnyy.
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Zvezdnyy continued to run, churning the spacetime around her so that the topological distance was actually shorter. Such a warping of space permitted her to move at arbitrary speeds only dictated by how fast she wanted to go.
She was like one of those 'speedsters' a classmate of hers was so fascinated by. Someone capable of moving at incredible speeds.
Zvezdnyy was having a lot of fun. This chase was exciting as it got her heart pumping. It was incredibly fun as well.
Just as the girl continued to run, she suddenly squinted as a powerful green light source from her left blinded her vision. Raising a hand up to block the light source, Zvezdnyy felt her stomach drop as she saw how stern her Polkovodets looked once her radiant aura disappeared.
Spacetime returned to normal as Zvezdnyy stopped running.
"Greetings, my esteemed Polkovodets! How fares the day in your esteemed presence?" Zvezdnyy's voice cracked as it got to the end.
There was a disappointed look on her Polkovodets face.
"Why did you do it, Zvezdnyy?"
"I… I was going to change it back even if she hasn't caught me." Zvezdnyy dropped her usual way of speaking in favor of the more direct method. "It wasn't permanent." She sulked, kicking the grassy field underneath her feet.
"You can't do that Zvezdnyy. You can't just change someone's body on a whim— do you remember what I said about extraordinary powers in an ordinary world?"
"Yes?"
"You have great powers, and thus you also have great responsibilities. You can't just change someone without their consent. It's a violation of their bodily autonomy."
Wait a minute, doesn't her Polkovodets heal people? Doesn't that also involve violating their 'autonomy'?
"But, don't you violate it when you heal those people?"
Instead of getting angry, her Polkovodets had an understanding expression, "I asked Emperor Nero if I could heal her men. She agreed. If the soldiers didn't want me to heal them they would've protested and I would listen to their protest and move on. For those who are too injured and cannot give their consent either verbally or nonverbally, I would listen to the troop's apothecary, a professional who is responsible for healing troops and having the soldier's trust."
"O—Oh…"
"Now, you're going to turn around and say sorry to Boudica before changing her back. Never alter an innocent without their consent again, do you understand?"
Zvezdnyy nodded with a subdued motion. She looked down on the ground in shame.
"Ahh, you know what? To fully enforce this view, Zvezdnyy, you're grounded for the rest of the Singularity."
"What?!" The girl jolted up.
"You're not going out of my field of view. You're gonna stay near me and never go further than 30 meters."
Oddly enough, instead of anger, Zvezdnyy felt a palpable sense of excitement instead of anger. So, the girl concluded, she'd be able to stay next to her Polkovodets no matter what the Goddess was doing.
Is this what it'll take to monopolize her Polkovodets' attention?
Seeing no response, her Polkovodets held her hand and said, "Come on, let's go and say sorry to Boudica."
"Alright."
For reasons completely outside of the comprehension of her Polkovodets, Zvezdnyy skipped towards where Boudica's chariot was. The Goddess followed closely behind the reality warper, hovering a few centimeters above the ground as she always does.
After about five minutes of Zvezdnyy skipping cheerfully, the duo reached where Boudica resided, the Servant was sitting by the trunk of a tree, under its cool shade away from the hot summer sun. The human and Demiservant were mimicking Boudica and did the same thing as her.
"She's here," Ritsuka said as he got up. "Just as I said, Kukulkan can handle this!"
"I dinnae recall doubtin' ye, Ritsuka." Putting an arm on her knee, Boudica pushed as she got up.
The most striking aspect of her was the tightly bound strand of rope wrapped around the Servant's chest, binding it tightly.
"Now please, Zvezdnyy, return me bosom. They're a symbol of me proud womanhood."
"Wait. Before Zvezdnyy does that, don't you have something to say to General Boudica?" Her Polkovodets ushered Zvezdnyy forward.
For a second, the girl was confused before realizing she was supposed to apologize. Her excitement made Zvezdnyy almost forget why she was coming here at all.
Doing a curtsey, Zvezdnyy bowed her head, "Forgive me, for I erred in altering your form without your consent or that of an apothecary."
Boudica nodded. "And I thank ye for that."
Slowly, Zvezdnyy deliberately added to the drama as she slowly brought her right hand up to her face with a wide swing. "With arcane words and gestures grand, I cast a spell, with a trembling hand. To rewind time, to days of yore. Return thee to thy form once more. I wish to revert my changes."
In an instant, Boudica's chest expanded to how it once was, breaking the ropes and filling the cups of her corset nicely.
Looking at this, Ritsuka spoke his thoughts out loud, "Zvezdnyy, why did you never chant when you teleport, but for something as simple as reverting your changes, you must chant?"
"Oh, that? 'Tis a mere preference of mine."
In short, 'Zvezdnyy is chanting because she likes it'.
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AN: My first attempt at creating a 'silly' chapter. It's meant to be funny. Laugh. I command you.
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