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0.05% Guide to raise my cutie husbands / Chapter 1: Woke up in a weird world
Guide to raise my cutie husbands Guide to raise my cutie husbands original

Guide to raise my cutie husbands

Author: fairytail72

© WebNovel

Chapter 1: Woke up in a weird world

" Dong Dong ! Dong Dong !"

Who ? Who was calling her ? Yu Dong was stunned and confused , her mind felt blurry and woozy like someone has hit the back of her head with a brick, where was she ? What was she doing ? The last thing she remembered was being outnumbered by a group of zombies - and why was her spiritual energy in so much chaos ?

Even though Yu Dong had no idea what was going on , she still used whatever energy she had to check her internal condition - did she suffer from some internal injuries or something ?

Her spiritual energy responded at once after checking her meridians and the result was - she consumed too much drugs ! Drugs ! DRUGS ! That made Yu Dong sit up straight alright , she was a zombie control officer with an apocalypse over her head where will she get the money to do drugs ? Has her inner world gone crazy ?

But if this much wasn't enough to confuse her - what was more , the sky above her head was blue - freaking blue like she has seen in the old pictures of her ancestors and the surroundings were flourishing with greenery - there were trees that were a shade of beautiful green and a river stream that was clean and crystal clear .

Yu Dong was confused - where was the red smokey coloured sky of the apocalypse ? Where were the muddy rivers which they have to filter with their spiritual energy before they could drink it ? And how come so many plants were growing up without the special care of agriculture experts who like her had awaken spiritual energy of nature .

And why was her body not hurting ? Wasn't she buried under a pile of zombies ?And why was she feeling like she needed to vomit.She waited and waited and waited for the pain of being ripped and chewed apart to come but nothing - there was no pain except the emptiness and wooziness of being drunk as a skunk .

" Oh you are awake " exclaimed a gruff woman's voice , then maybe the woman caught sight of her green complexion and severely scolded " don't you dare to vomit on my cart , Dong Dong ! I had used up all my savings and strength to pull you out of that tavern - dodgy place , Don't know what you were thinking !"

Huh ? Tavern what Tavern ? Wasn't she at the town squire ?

Yu Dong looked up , her head was still throbbing but thanks to her spiritual healing she could at least repair some of the damage done

to her body , unlike before where her eyes couldn't focus on one thing - now she could finally have a clear view of the woman who was driving the ox cart - she was middle aged , yet she looked sturdy except for her skin was a waxy yellow colour that showed lack of nutrition .

Yu Dong was even more confused ,a second before she was fighting with zombies now she was being reprimanded by this woman in just another second , what was happening ? Who was this woman ?

The woman sighed "Dong Dong you are really good ! Drinking and frolicking around when your wife is giving birth ? How can you - is your wife and child more important or that little slut in the tavern ?"

Then the woman paused and looked at Yu Dong sympathetically "I know that you don't like your wife and even if - even if your wife is like that , they are still kind to you aren't they ? How can you abandon your wife when - you still carried your wife through your doors and made your wife your own person , didn't you ? Now that your wife is in labour how can you go frolicking leaving your wife in hands of others ?"

Yu Dong , understood none of this - she subconsciously reached for her sword , finally coming on to the conclusion that the person in front of her was most probably an illusion flower but just as her hand reach to her waist , she realised that her sword was missing .

Bloody hell ! This was not her body ! Her sword 's existence was branded in her own body , meaning that only with the destruction of her body would the sword be severed , if it was not here - then - then where was she and whose body was this ?

Yu Dong pinched her cheeks , then looked around a little more attentively - this wasn't her world . There was nothing so clear and clean and beautiful in her world ( keep your surroundings safe and clean or the apocalypse ain't far from us either ) , so she died ? Yu Dong did remember being out numbered - the latest mutation of the zombies were highly intelligent and smart , they learned how to hide and lure humans and this was why she was attacked , if her sword wasn't here and she was not in her own world - tears sprung in her eyes , Oh God , she died didn't she ? Now what will happen to her little brothers ?

For ten years they were dependent on her now all of sudden they have to rely on each other ? At least they had enough food and water stored in their inner world for quiet a few years .

Maybe by then , they will grow up ? And learn how to use their spiritual energy - Yu Dong knew there was no chance for her to return not when her body was torn and eaten - she could only hope that her brothers would be able to live a proper life without her .

After grieving for a few minutes , Yu Dong finally recovered and sniffed - this was what she had learned from her experience how many officers sacrificed themselves so that the common people could live their lives safely ? She wasn't the first and she wasn't going to be the last either .

At least she was lucky enough to get a chance to live again - even if it was someone's else body .

Yu Dong sighed , now that she finally calmed herself down she finally started to understand what happened - while she was fighting the zombies , the Yu Dong of this world was having a nice time , drinking and having fun with the number one prostitute of the town . The Yu Dong might have overdosed herself on drugs maybe And died at the same time she lost her life .

" you said my wife is in labour ?" Asked Yu Dong finally grasping the most important bit of the conversation at the same time , she reached to touch her chest and only relaxed when she felt the squeezy soft feeling .

At least she still had these - wait what if ? She looked down at her tattered pants and gulped - oh no , please no .

That would be down right weird .

" yes , your wife went in labour an hour ago "the woman saw that Yu Dong didn't look a lot concerned about Mrs . Yu and felt bad for Yu Dong 's wife .

Yu Dong was actually nervous but she was a spiritual cultivator it just wasn't her nature to act in a frenzy or anxious way .

Yu Dong wasn't anxious but The woman was , she hurriedly whipped her ox and the ride became even more bumpy - Once or twice Yu Dong felt an urge to vomit .

God , how she missed her strong and sturdy body - not only did she died , she transmigrated in an alcoholic's body with a wife and child on its way - she , Yu Dong , the old bachelor of her squad was finally married , just like that ? And why was this woman driving an ox cart shouldn't it be a job of man ?

After what looked like a promised bumpy ride until her body might crumble to dust , the ox cart finally stopped and the woman dragged her to her house - calling it a house was really giving it a lot of face through it had a lot of rooms all of them were cracked and the roofs were leaking .

The fences were almost breaking but at least the yard was big , that was comfort to Yu Dong .

The woman dragged her all the way up to the room where the screams of pain and agony were resonating - the woman pushed open the door and Yu Dong wanted to stop her from doing so because they haven't sterilised themselves but it was too late the door to the labour room was opened - and laying on top of the bed was a gorgeous looking through a sickly complexion with a nine months pregnant belly - man !!!


Chapter 2: My wife is a man ?

Yu Dong stood on the door way and her entire expression was something really weird , she stared at the man with a pregnant belly and her mouth dropped , she felt like her three views of the world were crumbling - what happened to biology ? What happened to XX and XY chromosomes ? What happened to uterus and what not ? How come a man got pregnant , if her wife was a husband - shouldn't she be the one with a pregnant belly ?

She was shocked but the three husbands of The previous Yu Dong were even more shocked - how come their wife returned home so soon ? What was she doing here ? Shouldn't she be at the tavern with that Xiaohua , enjoying the time of her life ?

The one who was scared the most was the man who was groaning on the bed , he still remembered that Yu Dong got mad at him last night because he was making too much noise , thus , even though he was feeling like he was on the death 's door , he pursed his lips and turned silent , clutching his belly - his life wasn't important but the child in his belly was , if his wife got angry and she actually did something in her anger , he wouldn't be able to bear the consequences !

The one with a high ponytail and sharp features glanced at Yu Dong and his features hardened , if not for this woman being his wife , he would have thrown her out ! How dare she come here after doing what not with that prostitute !

However , he didn't - instead he looked at the man who looked the gentlest of all, the man with gentle features frowned but he still smiled politely and said " Wife - you haven't wash yourself yet why don't you take a bath before entering ?"

Yu Dong was waiting for this the moment she got an excuse , she hurriedly turned around and left , not caring whether she looked like a serious douche bag who abandoned her pregnant girlfriend - no , boyfriend .

Instead she hurriedly escaped to the kitchen and sat down clutching her hair , ' my wife is a man ' , ' my wife is a man who is pregnant with my child '

She kept muttering in her head but even after constant muttering , she still couldn't wrap her head around the reality that belonged to her now , a man actually got pregnant and he was also in labour ever since last night ? What was wrong with this world ?

The woman who brought her back , followed her to the kitchen , saw Yu Dong sitting there clutching her hair and sighed , she really didn't know how to make Yu Dong understand " Dong Dong , I know you are not happy with your husbands ( wife ) because they are not as beautiful as other Mers but they are still your husbands aren't they ? Don't you think its a little heartbreaking for them if you abandon then when they need you the most ?"

Mers what were mers ?

" I really can't believe that you actually went to the tavern and had that happy powder , people say it rots the brains of whoever who eats it yet here you are " exclaimed the woman as she busied herself and started boiling some water for Yu Dong to clean herself .

Rots people brain ? Happy powder ? Maybe that would explain why she had no recollection of this world , instantly she stopped the purification of her body and sent her spiritual energy to her brain , it took only a few moments for the fog to clear and finally Yu Dong realised that this world was not like earth , unlike the three genders of the earth - this world's gender hierarchy was totally different - this world didn't have much men thus they were treated like some rare gems , they were treated as princes , while the women whose population was higher than men went out for work and was responsible for earning money while the men stayed at home and waited to be spoiled but since their population was less that 1% women liked to spoil their man if they were lucky enough to marry one .

But except for these two genders there was another gender , a gender that was scorned upon - and that gender was - Mers . They looked like man and their figure resembled that of a man too but they were a bit shorter and delicate , they also had a cinnabar mole in the centre of their forehead that resembled a blooming red lotus . They had everything that a man might have but they didn't have the ability to make a woman pregnant , instead their body developed in such a way that they were the ones who got pregnant no matter whom they married whether man or woman .

Just like a woman they had an opening that could give birth but compared to women they hardly ever survived the labour and died - but their population was too much to control as girls and boys were rarely born - so no one cared if one mer died , they would simply go ahead and marry a different one if their mer died in childbirth - which was exactly what the original Yu Dong was aiming for , she had gotten bored of this young man and was aiming for bringing another mer in her family specifically the mer that was named as the number one prostitute of the tavern .

The previous Yu Dong didn't care about her husband or child in-fact she was looking forward to hearing the death of her husband and the unborn child so that she could happily marry the mer she liked .

Yu Dong rubbed her face and sighed , God , if you were aiming for my reincarnation couldn't you have at least transmigrated me in a body of a decent human ? What was with this shitty transmigration ?

No wonder her husbands looked like they were faced with a monster when they saw her , if she was in their place she would have looked at her like that too !

God , she refused to take this body - who knows where it has been and how many STD's was it carrying - a refund , a refund , she wanted a refund ! She didn't spend her entire life serving and protecting others only to be reincarnated as a douche bag shithole of a person !


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