Zero has changed since the last time I saw him.
He was looking better now, more aware, more substantial. Gone were the raggedy, stained clothes of a homeless person, patchy beard and the dirt covering his face. His hair was clean, moving slightly in the wind. He was clean-shaven, which made him look a lot younger than I thought he was when we first met. Piercing blue eyes, handsome, strong. He was wearing a t-shirt, black jeans and nothing else, standing barefoot in the snow, seemingly indifferent to the horrible cold that was biting me even through my parka. There was a curious smile on his lips, humorous sparks in his eyes.
And yet, with all that change, he looked just as mad as he did before. Only now, juxtaposed against the healthy appearance, Zero's insanity was even more apparent, even more frightening. And there were other things horribly wrong about him, too. He had no shadow. There were no footprints on the snow behind him. There was nothing at all to suggest that he was real, except for the fact that I could see him, and feel him, and I knew that he was.
Zero looked at me, tilting his head a little, and said:
'Do you really?'
#
The words hang in the air between us. I swallowed, feeling cold sweat streaming down my back. Zero was still looking at me, awaiting an answer.
'Can you... can you read my mind?'
He stared, unmoving.
'I know you. You're Matthew.'
I slowly nodded.
'Yes. We met once before, on a street. Back in December.'
Zero touched his neck.
'Really? I thought it was a dream.'
I took a careful step forward.
'No, no it wasn't. We met, and you told me...'
He smiled.
'I remember! I was the one there. I said: am I real? And you said: sorry, mister! Our friend here had one too many drinks! But it wasn't you. It was the other you. Was it you?'
I blinked, uncomprehending.
'I was the one there, too. And you said to me that you remember. You said: Zero Five Ten. That's a PA number. It belonged to my mother.'
Zero smirked.
'That's silly. Numbers can't belong to people.'
Then his face changed, and he looked at me with sudden darkness in his eyes.
'People, though. People can belong to numbers. Do you have a number, Matthew?'
There was danger in his question. I felt it seeping through the cold, coiling around me. But I didn't know the right answer.
I licked my lips.
'Do you?'
He raised his eyebrows, amused.
'Numbers are dangerous. They gave me one, but I slipped away. I left it where no one can find it. Now I'm just zero. Zero zero zero zero...'
His words echoed through the snow and dissipated into the air. Now that the initial shock of seeing him was receding, I was starting to think clearly again. The first thing I thought about were the Protectors, who undoubtedly were already circling back to the main building in search of me. The second thing I thought about was that now, after I broke Zero's invisibility Affect, everyone walking past could see him, barefoot in the snow, wearing nothing but a t-shirt in the middle of January. The third thing I thought about was Claire, waiting for me back in the cafeteria.
Despite the sheer insanity of the situation, I needed to find a solution. I needed to get Zero out of here, somewhere where the Protectors won't see him, as far away from Claire as I possibly could. We'll be able to talk then. I'll ask him all the questions burning in my mind then. Right now, all I needed to do was persuade him to come with me, or better yet with Mickey, to a safe place.
I said:
'You came to me for a reason, Zero. You wanted something from me. What do you want?'
He frowned.
'I don't quite remember. But I will, when I need to.'
He smiled, but there was something painful about his smile.
'When the time comes, I'll remember. Yes, yes. I will.'
He sighed.
'You see, I'm not always real, but when I am, I am, and then I see that I was, and I know. But sometimes what I was is not what I need to know, or be. That's why I came to you. You are always real, and you are what I need to be to know, and make it real. Do you understand?'
I shook my head.
'No. Not yet. You need to explain it better, Zero. Will you explain it?'
He shook his head angrily.
'I did! I just did, damn it! Don't you see?! Why doesn't anyone see?!'
The anger flashed and disappeared. He suddenly looked very tired. He turned away, as if remembering where he was, noting the snow for the first time.
'I came to see... Someone was calling me. Someone precious. I came to remember who it is, or was. Or will be. Was it you?'
I made another step forward.
'No. It was someone I asked to.'
'Who?'
'You daughter. Tanya.'
He looked at me, slowly taking in my words. His lips moved, repeating her name. Then his eyes widened, and he recoiled in terror, hiding his face in his hands.
'No! No! No! She can't see me! She can't see me! She can't be when I am, no!'
I made the last step and, with careful deliberation, placed my hand on his shoulder.
'That's okay. If you don't want to, she won't. I'll make sure of it.'
His skin wasn't scorchingly hot, like the last time I've touched him. He wasn't an apparition, either. No, he was real, standing in front of me in flesh and blood, trembling.
'But for that, I need you to come with my friend Mickey to a safe place. Can you do that, Zero?'
As I said it, there was a sound of steps behind my back. Mickey ran out of the door, eyes darting around. He stopped a couple of meters from us, briefly shocked to see Zero. Then he shook it off, and made a symbol with his fingers.
"P"
So, the Protectors were not far behind him.
I beckoned him to come over.
'This is Mickey, Zero. Do you recognize him?'
Zero looked past us, as though not hearing my words.
I turned to Mickey:
'You need to take him away from here.'
Mickey stared at me.
'Where the fuck am I supposed to take him?'
'Somewhere safe... My apartment.'
'Are you crazy?! They're watching your apartment!'
I pushed them both in the direction opposite the main building.
'Well they're not watching it right now, are they?! They're here looking for me. You have to go, now!'
Mickey tried to say something, baffled, but then simply nodded and grabbed Zero, dragging him away.
I looked until they disappeared behind a corner, then turned around and headed back to the building.
In the doors, I stumbled into the woman with dark hair.
'Oh, sorry. Hell of weather, huh?' I said nonchalantly and walked past her without a glance.